https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 23 Jun 2026 18:16:55 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842960 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 20:13:50 +0000 Amorini 2842960@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly it saddens me to hear about these calloused baby teachers. :crying: I know there are so many loving and caring ones, and it is such a hard job, day in and day out, and many daycares do not provide the best compensation, etc. But the whole notion of teaching kindness, patience and empathy lies in how we treat these tiny humans. I have heard (in jest?) teachers of big kids say that they don’t smile until Christmas, but ffs, what’s the sense of being cold with little ones? Like just no. It’s not right. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842938 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 17:38:17 +0000 Mama Bird 2842938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: this. My son had a teacher like that in the older group, which is roughly 2.5-5 in that day care. That's a big range, and the teacher was neither able nor willing to meet the youngest kids halfway. She was a very good teacher, but... um... she really shouldn't have had two-year-olds in her group. I know that several kids stopped going No. 2 (sorry if that's tmi!) in her class, presumably because they were supposed to do everything themselves but still needed help. DS had developed a pretty bad problem by the time we figured this out. One kid also barely ate because he was a little picky - in the younger group they'd always find him something he was OK with, but there was no compromise in the older group. Luckily his dad was just about to become a SAHD for other reasons, so he was pulled out of the day care. Yeah, younger kids really struggled there, and if I'd realized sooner that DS was having a hard time, I'd ask if he can go back to the younger group for a few months... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842917 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:49:58 +0000 wrkbrk 2842917@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@peaches1038: Thank you friend ❤️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842916 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:49:38 +0000 wrkbrk 2842916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: Thank you so much ❤️ it is what I’m worried about. Can you tell I have anxiety?! Lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842915 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:48:43 +0000 wrkbrk 2842915@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ajsmommy: Thank you. I feel how you do but am always second guessing myself for not being strict enough!<br /> ETA so basically a disaster of a match for my kid 🤦🏼‍♀️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842913 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:48:01 +0000 wrkbrk 2842913@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@annem1990: WTF re your brother! Not ok!!!!! This is his last year at daycare BUT all of the pre-schools we are applying to come observe him in his room now and I’m currently worrying about that..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842912 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:45:50 +0000 wrkbrk 2842912@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: Agree 100% - see above :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842911 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:45:20 +0000 wrkbrk 2842911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@nwm: That’s exacrly how I feel. Sure it would be great if he wanted to drop it but her taking it away for nap on his first day in a totally new room?? Well guess what. He cried and didn’t sleep. I told her very clearly to give it back. Which she did for another week then took it away again and told me at the END of the week where she claimed he doesn’t ask anymore! Like it was a big victory. And I was seriously shocked. I didn’t know if I should throw down lol. So I accepted it but it makes me so angry when I think about her unilaterally making that decision for my child. It is not a school rule. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842909 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:42:46 +0000 wrkbrk 2842909@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ChitownRo: Right! There are two aids in there who are fantastic and that’s the only reason we didn’t already ask that he be moved to the younger room. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842908 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:42:06 +0000 wrkbrk 2842908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Littlebit7: Thank you ❤️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842907 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:41:44 +0000 wrkbrk 2842907@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: And I have GAD so I’m constantly worried I’ll pass it on to DS either generically or through my behavior! TBH I am too lax at home because of it. So these “rules” kind of came out of the blue to him which is on me. But how do I figure out how to change at home all of a sudden? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842906 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:40:36 +0000 wrkbrk 2842906@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsbells: Sigh they did do this and we were out of town for the entire week of it. So he completely missed the transition days. Good point. I forgot about that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842904 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 15:40:00 +0000 wrkbrk 2842904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amorini: Thank you. The crazy thing is that the school doesn’t have set rules or expectations per age. It’s just this teacher’s idea of what kids should do! She seems proud that she’s getting them “in line” or something. He’s only 2.5 😞 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842853 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 11:43:05 +0000 Mrsbells 2842853@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: it sounds like he isn't ready for the new class. At our daycare they do a gradual transition where he would visit the new class for a few hours each day to get ready for it. Can you ask of he can do that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842850 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 11:26:20 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2842850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: Sure sounds like anxiety. Hard to listen when you're anxious. I'd probably set up a meeting with the director to express my concerns and give them a chance to make things better. Then if they didn't take you seriously I'd be looking for another class or a different center. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It is so stressful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842802 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 08:39:11 +0000 wrkbrk 2842802@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you guy so much for not making me sound crazy!! I’ll respond to each comment later when I have time. I’ve read each one twice!</p> <p>Also DS now is MORE attached to his paci and blanket at home. He never used to drag them around from room to room and now he won’t let either out of his sight. Obviously trying to comfort himself... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842777 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 07:11:06 +0000 Littlebit7 2842777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Reading this makes me really sad for your kiddo. I mean, he’s a little kid. He’s the youngest in his class. My daughter still has trouble doing those things consistently and she’s 3.5.<br /> She was the absolute youngest in her 2.5s program last year. The teacher addressed it several times directly with us, in the vein of “these are the things that are challenging for her but we are working hard with her to master them! She’s the youngest in the class so we expect that, but we are also fully confident that she will learn them!”</p> <p>It seems like this teacher would be better suited for an older class but that’s neither here nor there. You aren’t being annoying; you are picking up on situation which is negatively affecting your kiddo. </p> <p>Hope it works out. It’s hard at this age. They are SO little yet some people expect so much of them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842772 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 06:43:05 +0000 Silva 2842772@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would probably try to push for a new room. it sounds like this teacher, for whatever reason, isn't equipped to deal with normal behaviors from a younger child. She wants more independent kids in her classroom. 2 years and 9 months is not that. My son will have just turned 3 when he goes to preschool next fall, but they won't take him if he's not able to use the bathroom independently- so its a pretty clear line, and they are not a daycare.<br /> Another anecdotal story- my brother had a teacher in 2nd grade who kept pushing my mom to have him evaluated for ADHD/ADD or some sort of global learning disability. She literally told my mother that he should be on medication (this was during the hay-day of Ritalin for little kids). My mom refused and instead had him IQ tested, and then marched into the classroom and told the teacher that the reason my brother was all over the place was because he was bored out of his skull. He never had significant issues in any other classroom. Sometimes, for whatever reason, teachers aren't a good fit for certain kids. Its really unfortunate, but its probably unavoidable- people are people. I think thats where we, as parents, have to do our best to be objective and advocate as needed.<br /> Its the being objective part that is so hard- which I think you are very sensitive to. None of us wants to rush in and clear the way all of the time for our kid, or go around with blinders on so that we only see our kid as perfect. But I don't get that sense from your post, and I think you should keep pushing and advocating until there are more reasonable expectations for your son. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842770 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 06:27:07 +0000 Ajsmommy 2842770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Geesh, this sounds harsh for his age! And I'd have a big issue and want to have him moved from that class or that center all together! </p> <p>These are kids, little kids! And I honestly think sometimes these teachers expectations are too high. They are ansty and can't sit still for very long and transitions are hard... a good teacher would know these things and be prepared to handle these things appropriately instead of just accusing the kid(s) of not listening or bad behavior. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842766 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 05:27:37 +0000 annem1990 2842766@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Probably not the anecdotal story you’re looking for, but this happened to my brother.<br /> His Kindergarten teacher HATED him. She constantly complained to my mother, had him on a “sticker chart” plan (the only kid in the class) and a nightly journal. My parents really thought that his future at the school (K-8) was going to be tough.<br /> Once he had a new teacher in 1st grade, he never had “behavior problems” again. He won a coveted 8th grade leadership award, was always on honor roll, etc. For whatever reason that teacher just didn’t click with him. It’s unfortunate, but happens.<br /> Also, I was a K-2 teacher for many years and I found that while teachers do gossip with one another, they also make their own judgements and behavior stereotypes don’t necessarily follow the kid.<br /> This is just all to say that whole that teacher may not be a good fit for him and you’re paying so you should feel totally comfortable! But I wouldn’t worry that this is going to follow him for the rest of his life. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842764 Fri, 31 Aug 2018 04:29:20 +0000 erinbaderin 2842764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would suuuuper not be ok with a lot of this, especially the paci - that is a parenting decision! When my son (at 4) came home from daycare and told me he wasn’t allowed to suck his fingers in class I was even annoyed, and he’s substantially older! I would absolutely direct the teacher to give it back and probably talk to the director. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842758 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 23:09:39 +0000 nwm 2842758@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i have to echo @ChitownRo, i would probably want my LO out of this teacher's room. taking his paci away against your express instructions?! hard no. this would be a completely different situation if losing the paci was a policy they warned you about, or something you agreed jointly to work on, but she doesn't get to unilaterally decide that and it feels like a red flag to me given the other issues you describe. i'm feeling angry on your behalf. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842754 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 22:11:52 +0000 peaches1038 2842754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Uhhhh that’s ridiculous!! No way h can put on his own shoes! Like what?! He can pull his pants down, but half the time he doesn’t pull them down enough and pee gets on them anyway. That’s a huge transition for C and it sounds like she has unrealistic expectations of him. Does she give you specific examples of him not listening? Is there a lot more structure or academic focus in this classroom or is it still playbased? I would be SO PISSED if they took H’s binky away when I specifically said not to. Like WTF. I’m upset for you and I don’t think you are even close to being THAT parent. Ugh, I really don’t have any suggestions but I’m upset for you and c!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842751 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 21:58:33 +0000 ChitownRo 2842751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I’d talk to the director and ask to be moved to a different class. This teacher sounds cold, which is the opposite of what I would want in someone with my kid for hours a week </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842747 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 21:45:02 +0000 Amorini 2842747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: I don’t think you’re being too defensive or being THAT kind of mom. You are just tuning into a situation that you feel is not right for your DS. It would 100% go mamma bear on that situation (in a very calm but yeah-no kind of way). I agree that they should have listed their expectations (like no diapers in jk) and then also realized that he won’t have the skills of the older ones when they worked out their numbers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842742 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 21:17:00 +0000 wrkbrk 2842742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: So interesting!! I just met this woman 2 weeks ago so I truly have no idea what’s going on in her life. I also don’t know if she’s less generous (aka on their daily sheets, “great day” is never circled) or it’s just my DS. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842740 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 21:14:44 +0000 Foodnerd81 2842740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: well this could make you feel better- the teacher who had a problem with my “problem child” 4 year old last year actually WAS going through family stuff, divorcing, moving. Once I learned that it totally made sense that she just wasn’t 100% with the kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842738 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 20:53:52 +0000 wrkbrk 2842738@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetCaroline: Thank you for the feedback. This is honestly what my wife and I think but I’m worried I’m being too defensive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842736 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 20:43:42 +0000 SweetCaroline 2842736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry but this is on the teacher. Shouldn't she be part of the parent/teacher team that is teaching your son to do these things that he cannot do? He sounds developmentally on track.<br /> The teacher sounds like she might actually have something going on at work or home that is interfering with her ability to deal/perform at 100%.</p> <p>When she says he can't pull his pants down or put his shoes on, what is she looking for? I think I would respond, "Yup, you're right. He's learning. Are you guys working with him on those things here? We're doing XYZ at home."</p> <p>Bah. Good luck mama. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/new-class-feedback-is-ds-not-listening#post-2842735 Thu, 30 Aug 2018 20:38:17 +0000 wrkbrk 2842735@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To add: the new teacher took his paci away for nap explicitly against my instructions and simply told him (and me), big boys don’t need pacis. I was honestly too surprised to argue but I should have. I mean wtf - right? It’s not a school policy or anything. She just decided he doesn’t need it! 😡<br /> ETA but then I think is she a blessing? The structure and push he needs by is resisting because we are too soft?? Ugh parenting is hard. </p>