https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 17 Apr 2026 16:26:14 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801873 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 17:41:30 +0000 periwinklebee 2801873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@snarkybiochemist: I know I should be prepared for figuring out this stuff to be my new normal, good luck with everything!</p> <p>@Shantuck: good to know, I feel like not being beyond exhausted should help with supply too... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801865 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 16:46:36 +0000 Shantuck 2801865@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: also, just remembered that I didn’t pump during the night even though I probably should of if I was supplemetnting. Decided to roll the dice and give myself a break. Just breastfed and went back to bed and my supply still was fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801856 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 14:57:54 +0000 snarkybiochemist 2801856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: I'm still figuring it out, my latest debate is if I should continue pumping at work since I don't meet her daily needs and don't have a stash to fall back on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801847 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 14:09:32 +0000 periwinklebee 2801847@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Shantuck: thank you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801841 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 13:16:17 +0000 Shantuck 2801841@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: I used my double electric pump. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801840 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 13:06:05 +0000 periwinklebee 2801840@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Shantuck: Thank you - super helpful! Did you use a hand pump or electric? I do notice that output seems a little higher with the hand pump, which the lactation consultant recommended for this reason, but so labor intensive if you want to do more than a few minutes on each side... </p> <p>@snarkybiochemist: Thank you! It's so hard, I've found that I've gotten the best output from pumping at like 4am in the morning, when my baby is too sleepy to take a full feed but my supply is pretty high. But then it really cuts into precious sleep time....I never had such an appreciation before for how valuable a little bit of time can be. It's awesome that you guys are doing what works best for you </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801829 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 11:49:43 +0000 snarkybiochemist 2801829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: of course. I hope things get easier soon. I also suggest seeing a lactation consultant and knowing where your comfort lies. I didn't want to offer the breast then a bottle then pump every feed. I would pump between feeds while she was sleeping in the beginning when she still needed to supplement after all feeds, I never pumped in the middle of the night and once she stopped needing day supplements I pretty much stopped pumping. For me although breast milk is important being present with my daughter or having time to recharge or nap or do something for me was more important. I still cry sometimes over having to give her formula but I am coming to terms with it. You will figure out what's best for you and your family and make it work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801825 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 11:16:54 +0000 Shantuck 2801825@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: My ped had me breastfeeding at the beginning of each feed and then feeding 2 oz of breast milk if I had it or formula if I didn’t via bottle immediately after. Every time I fed a bottle, I was told to pump for 10 minutes (which got saved for the next feed - so to answer your question, I was pumping at each feed every few hours). Once we got to the point where we saw a steady weight gain, I then was able to drop the bottle/pumping part of the feed. I emphasized to my ped that I was happy to supplement but wanted to make sure I wasn’t jeopardizing my breastfeeding success down the line and she was really helpful in coming up with a plan that worked for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801816 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 10:30:51 +0000 periwinklebee 2801816@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@snarkybiochemist: @mrswin: thank you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801814 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 10:07:25 +0000 mrswin 2801814@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: I don’t remember what the amount was that she wanted in a 10 minutes period but it was less than 200 mls transferred so she said it would have taken the baby too long to transfer a full feed. Try and look for someone who is an actual IBLC. Even though my DD was full term she struggled to nurse the first little while </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801812 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 09:54:44 +0000 snarkybiochemist 2801812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: yea I got really good at eating while breastfeeding and everything else either waited or my husband did it. I would just settle in on the couch and had total control over the tv </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801806 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 08:53:24 +0000 periwinklebee 2801806@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Goose: Glad to hear another case of long wake times... in our case it seems to be mostly in the evening and associated with cluster feeding.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801805 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 08:50:25 +0000 periwinklebee 2801805@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all - this is super helpful! I knew there were lots of different opinions, but have been surprised at just how much conflicting advice we've gotten from different people at the same ped practice. His weight gain has been just on the border of being what they like to see, so I think that's part of it. Definitely accurate to call it an advice buffet :silly: </p> <p>@Shantuck: How often did you pump? </p> <p>@Kemma: Hah, I like your mantra. Hope things are going well! </p> <p>@LCTBQE: Thanks :heart: I think I'm getting a better feel for when I'm pretty much empty, and trying to either have my husband soothe him with the paci or give a bit of a supplement if he still seems really hungry, as me being a 24 hour a day human pacifier is not good for any of us...</p> <p>@SweetiePie: Completely makes sense. and yeah, I am same - I have to take care of my needs at least a bit or I'm not good for any of us. Thankfully we've figured out some tweaks that seem to have helped a lot with nighttime sleep, and I'm finally feeling a bit more human...</p> <p>@mrswin: I'd love to do a weighted feed. The LC at my ped's office doesn't do them but I think I could see someone privately. Do you know about how much they should be taking in a 10 minute period? </p> <p>@snarkybiochemist: My baby also cluster feeds the most in the evenings... </p> <p>@gingerbebe: good points, I've also been working on keeping him awake...</p> <p>I seem to have started leaking milk all over the place this morning, which I wasn't before, so hopefully that means supply is going up and he won't need to be feeding quite so long to get what he needs... </p> <p>Thanks again - so helpful to learn from more experienced moms and not feel like I must be doing something wrong... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801793 Sat, 03 Feb 2018 02:09:04 +0000 Kemma 2801793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can only speak from my experience but I’m a creature of habit so my kids naturally just “routined” themselves around the rhythm of our household once they got out of the newborn phase. I do believe that most babies and kids thrive on routine but it doesn’t need to be strict or especially time based, it’s more about having some structure to the day (little things like napping after breakfast or having a nap after lunch).</p> <p>One thing that did help me survive the newborn days was to have three things I did everyday - take a shower, make the bed, and have breakfast - and I’m still following that mantra now that my oldest child is five! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801756 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 20:19:25 +0000 Shantuck 2801756@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My second had weight gain issues so I just fed as much as possible in the early days until we got to the point where I didn’t have to wake her to feed. She was a drowsy newborn, which my ped explained in part was because she wasn’t eating enough and thus was low energy. Because she wasn’t eating well, my supply suffered a little in the early days because my body wasn’t getting the message that it needed to make more. It was super stressful but my ped and lactation consultant were amazing at coming up with various plans that involved supplementing and pumping. Eventually we hit our groove and I didn’t need to supplement or pump. Happy to help if I can. I was really stressed by all those early weight gain issues. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801750 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 20:01:48 +0000 LCTBQE 2801750@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ElbieKay: ah love the advice buffet! that's such a good way to look at it. </p> <p>@periwinklebee: this may or may not resonate with you, so big grain of salt, I don't want to be another piece of conflicting advice. my kid was doing what yours is (the endless sessions) and our ped told us he was using me as a human pacifier if we went that long, and to cut the sessions off after 20-30 minutes and then nurse again later on demand (like, not much later... if he wanted it, which he often did, 45 or 60 minutes later). She told me it would give me a chance to refill and wouldn't affect my supply negatively because the frequency of sessions was still so high, and that most of the milk was gone after the first 20 minutes. I remember I literally cried from relief in the doctor's office when she told me that. Limiting the *length* but not the frequency of sessions completely saved my sanity, I was pulling all-nighters one after another of these crazy marathon nursing sessions and was basically losing it from sleep deprivation. someone can correct me if I'm wrong here, but my understanding is that nursing on demand does not mean you are a slave to unending nursing sessions. if you need a break or he is just totally not sated, I think here and there a supplement top-off after a session is not a crime. I didn't have supply issues so I don't want to issue bad advice, but my impression is that it won't sabotage your efforts to get your supply up if you're really nursing that much around the clock. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801744 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 19:32:52 +0000 ElbieKay 2801744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We let our son drive his cycle and went by his cues for quite awhile. We didn't get into more of a proper schedule until he started STTN, and then when I went back to work our nanny was much better about a weekday schedule than we ever were.</p> <p>You have to get to know your kid and figure out what works for him. My son has always been pretty go-with-the-flow and been ok with a flexible schedule, but a different kid might need more structure. I don't think any newborn is seriously ready for a 24-hr routine though.</p> <p>I view parenting advice as a buffet, and I pick what resonates with me. From there I experiment to see what works best with my kid. You will drive yourself crazy if you try to follow every piece of parenting advice so just use it to brainstorm problems and otherwise follow your instincts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801742 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 19:23:18 +0000 SweetiePie 2801742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>2 things:</p> <p>1) don’t let conflicting info stress you - let it liberate you! It means that there’s no right answer, just what’s right for you. The things that are a hard and fast rule you’ll know - like, kid has to be in a car seat in the car. Don’t leave baby alone in the bathtub. But sleeping and eating and minutes on the breast and how to sleep train and blah blah blah - you’ll hear a ton of advice because there’s no hard and fast rule.<br /> 2) you might want to consider what your main priority is (breastfeeding exclusively, a schedule, sleep, etc) and make your decision based on that. For example if EBF is extremely important to you and your main goal, then I would follow the advice to just feed on demand and not worry much about a schedule, falling asleep at the breast, or wake times etc.<br /> If sleep is most important (I desperately needed night sleep for myself and time to recharge during naps, so sleep and schedule were most important to me) I would focus less on feed on demand (maybe allow supplementing, for example) and more on max wake times, not allowing daytime sleep to exceed 3 hours, and getting into a routine like EASY (for now) which will develop more into a schedule in a couple/few weeks. </p> <p>Does this make sense??? It does in my head but I may not be articulating clearly. Basically take in all the conflicting info, decide what your priority is, and distill that conflicting info down to what helps meet your priority. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801728 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 17:32:15 +0000 DesertDreams88 2801728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Like @gingerbebe: , lack of a schedule stressed me out. At 3-4 weeks I started EASY and following waketimes. I never stopped a feeding though, and I never woke LO up from naps if they went long. There was definitely a lot of cluster feeding at night and I was more flexible with the routine during those hours. By 3 months he was in a pretty clear schedule. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801717 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 16:57:35 +0000 mrswin 2801717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: At that age just feed when they seem to want to eat, they do a lot of growing and sometimes can’t go very long. That said my DD was like your LO..if left to her own devices would nurse for well over 45 minutes. We worked with an LC who did weighed feeds and what we figured out was that she wasn’t a very good sucker and had to work really hard to get milk which meant she would use up a lot of energy nursing, pass out for 45 minutes and wake up and want to nurse again. </p> <p>We ended up using a supplemental nursing system for a few week to help her improve her sucking and she eventually shortened up her sessions and consolidated feedings </p> <p>Had the LC done a weighed feed for you? We took my DD in and they weighed her with all her clothes off, then would set a timer for me to nurse her for 10 minutes and then they would weigh her again. They had a very sensitive scale that I think went to a thousandth of a gram </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801714 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 16:50:52 +0000 IRunForFun 2801714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, let him cluster feed. Cluster feeding serves an important purpose - it signals your body to make more milk and regulating your supply for your specific baby happens in those first couple weeks. He may not even be fully awake at the breast while he's cluster feeding so I wouldn't really count that into his awake time. </p> <p>I can understand what they might have meant about implementing a schedule in which he feeds AT LEAST every 3 hours, especially if there were weight gain concerns. But if he is wanting to eat more than that, feed on demand! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801713 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 16:47:03 +0000 JennyPenny 2801713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Congratulations! I think you're getting conflicting advice because there's no *right* answer, just what's right for you and right for your family. I loved having the Eat, Wake, Sleep routine for my LOs and started on it early. I've told friends how great it worked for us and they've said they find it too stressful and would rather do on-demand until baby is older. One thing that seems to work well is looking at the reviews for parenting books on amazon. They pretty much all have mixed reviews because people can love/hate the advice or parenting styles detailed in them. If you read the reviews and find yourself agreeing with the positive people's perspectives and think the negative reviewers sound like nutters then that would likely be a parenting style (and guidelines) that would work well for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801702 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 16:17:49 +0000 jhd 2801702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: no advice but popping in to say huge congrats on your precious boy! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801696 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 16:05:48 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2801696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gingerbebe: I can see that happening too. I personally love a schedule for the kids and once they can successfully get into that groove, I am all about doing the naps and bedtime and even feedings down to the minute. Haha. That being said, when things go off schedule I have a really hard time managing my disappointment I guess and it causes me stress. I find that at he beginning it’s really hard to have a successful schedule so that causes me stress. So even though I’m not a go with the flow person really ever, I’m mostly go with the flow for the first two months of a baby’s life. However, I also have kids who don’t sleep a lot when they’re babies so perhaps that factors into scheduling difficulty in the beginning. When everyone else’s newborns are all sleepy and doing 20 hours per day at the beginning combined mine were doing about 14 per 24 hours. My second had fairly strong jaundice that lasted over a week and that didn’t even make him drowsy. My first slept pretty good at night from the get go and my second ran me through the ringer at night for the first four months. I did the same with both of them except for holding for long naps with my first as I couldn’t with my second, but fed every 2.5-3.5 hours for both kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801677 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 15:33:45 +0000 MsMini 2801677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As newborns I just made sure my babies ate every 3 hours during the day and 4 hours at night minimum. I fed them more often of course as they cued. I didn’t attempt to Keto them awake, just followed their cues re:wakefulness. They were all (3) jaundiced so VERY sleepy through the first few weeks. Just now at 3 months old I am following more of a routine. At far as during the day feed, awake for 1-1 1/2 hours, then down for nap, and repeat until bedtime. No clock schedule though, I just basically follow her cues. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801676 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 15:31:46 +0000 snarkybiochemist 2801676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter was eating every 2-3 hours at that point except in the evenings where I think she ate every hour practically. During the day I tried to follow a rough eat play sleep line of thought but in the evenings I basically just sat with her at my boobs. She would sometimes fall asleep sometimes not but was definitely up more than the suggested 45 min, hell even during the day sometimes she was up longer then that suggestion. I tried to follow her cues as best I could while also still maintaining my sanity and helping my supply. If I wasn't paying attention my daughter would get lazy while eating and could be on a side for forever only sucking every now and then so I had to rub her back or tickle her feet to help her stay focused. She still eats better at night if she is stripped down to a diaper, thankfully during the day she is willing to eat with clothing on.<br /> We had to supplement early on and at first it was offering a bottle after every feeding, now its just a bottle top up after bed and any middle of the night feeds. In the evening though I just went with the cluster feeding so that my body would get as much of the message as it could that I needed to produce more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801666 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 15:17:26 +0000 gingerbebe 2801666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Goose: I guess I'm in the minority as a LACK of schedule really caused me enormous stress. The first few weeks of DS1's life was chaos and I felt totally lost and unmoored by all the conflicting info like the OP is talking about. (He was also colicky and had reflux, so there's that). DS1 was a terrible infant and it wasn't until we instituted a schedule at 6 weeks I felt like I had something to cling to in my day. </p> <p>With DS2, I just nursed and tried to keep him awake and offered him a top off after each feeding. Initially this was because of jaundice, but we kept it up - either with pumped breastmilk or formula - and was able to stop doing it after a few weeks when I knew my supply was regulated and I could tell when I was empty and when I wasn't. DS2 liked to cluster feed for 4 hours from 2am to 6am in the beginning and on some nights when I was just too tired, I gave him a bottle and held a paci to his mouth while we both tried to snooze a bit. He fell into a 3-hour feeding schedule very quickly and we did drowsy but awake from the beginning and he was a great newborn. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801661 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 15:09:23 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2801661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That early on my LO naturally had an every 2-3 hour feeding routine. I did a mix of breast and bottle and at 5 weeks exclusive breast. He didn’t fall asleep at the breast, but definitely slept a lot as a newborn. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801657 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 15:00:43 +0000 snowjewelz 2801657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I never stopped feedings, esp that early! Eat-play-sleep or even sometimes eat-sleep-play haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/newborns-and-schedules#post-2801650 Fri, 02 Feb 2018 14:45:20 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2801650@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Congratulations! I will echo what I assume most people will advise, which is, don’t worry at all about a schedule at this point. </p> <p>I think if you want to, 2 Months is probably the earliest I’d do a schedule and it would just be an eat, play, sleep for me. By 3 months that’s the schedule I did although sometimes it didn’t work because crappy crib naps were occurring. I don’t worry about max feeding or wake times because both my kids have exceeded max wake times from the day they were born so you have to do what your baby wants to do. My daughter stayed awake for four hours when she was a week old and it was in the 8am-noon time range. She wasn’t grumpy and then she slept fine at night and for her naps being held. They both sttn by 6 months old. </p> <p>I think it just causes stress if you try to adhere to a schedule too soon. </p> <p>The only thing I will say about long nursing sessions is that can sometimes indicate supply problems (which it sounds like you’re exploring), however at a really young age it can be normal for some babies and not be an issue. </p> <p>And for cluster feeding, sometimes it’s not even a choice for you, or doesn’t feel like it is anyway. Both mine clusterfed every early evening for the first month at least. </p> <p>Enjoy! It goes super quick. :( </p>