https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 18:39:13 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-750272 Mon, 29 Apr 2013 10:56:39 +0000 DillonLion 750272@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjyw: I envy your work schedule! But I'm also happy with how ours is. It's not ideal, but it works for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-745244 Thu, 25 Apr 2013 22:12:49 +0000 mrsjyw 745244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The ONLY reasons we are thriving in our work/life balance is because of my work schedule (two days at home) and because my mom is here 3 days out of the week (overnight) and watches A while I work from home sometimes too.</p> <p>There is NO way we'd have any balance without either of those factors. We are so grateful and extremely lucky to have our child care situation. Thank you baby Jesus. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-707952 Thu, 11 Apr 2013 12:49:16 +0000 DillonLion 707952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SleepyMonkey: We definitely are having trouble splitting up the duties now that I am back at work. But ours was more of DH was doing all the household chores (which is amazing!) and I was on baby duty. But I felt like it was important for him to take more of a roll in caring for his daughter and bonding with her, so one night a week I go to therapy, and he handles all the evening routine, and any wakeups that happen overnight. </p> <p>He's also been more active in voluntarily taking the baby to spend time with her. </p> <p>So, we're on a good path so far, but I'd still like to eventually get to a point where he spends more time with her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-706457 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:47:34 +0000 SleepyMonkey 706457@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>sorry i'm late to the party, but i just can't find time in the day to be on HB anymore! i'm in the same boat as everyone else, my day doesn't really END until 8pm and i want to be in bed by 9pm. i actually like being back at work, but it is exhausting. i have no idea how any mom finds time in her day to exercise. i only have free time to feed myself and take a shower, nothing else.</p> <p>@lindseykaye: @kml636: @SLR: for of you thinking about getting a cleaning service...DO IT. i finally broke down and got a cleaning lady 2x per month and it is amazing. i've never seen my apartment this clean before, ever. and my apartment is cluttered, but she finds a way to organize the clutter to make it look neat. i don't have any idea how she does it. i did not know what clean meant until she cleaned my apartment. </p> <p>@SLR: i also felt like i was taking on the bulk of the housework...like for some reason i felt like it was my responsibility...my dad then reminded me the other day that i and make good money and i am not expected to take on the housework, cooking, etc. i am an equal contributor to the household finances and for some reason, i realized just then that he was totally right. i think i felt that way because i'm a woman, and there is some part of culture that expects us to do all the housework. there is no reason i should be the one that always washes my pump parts and bottles, or the one waking up at night to feed her. i have a job too, so the job of taking care of our daughter needs to be shared equally. anyway. i'm getting off my soapbox now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704732 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 09:52:20 +0000 kml636 704732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SLR: that is great you DH is such a big help. I'm also trying to organize dinners, I'm super lazy about it but so glad when I do! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704315 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 08:06:56 +0000 SLR 704315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kml636: @scg00387: Thanks ladies. Hope I didn’t come off that I’m throwing myself a pity party. It’s good to know that many of us are in the same boat and I’m not the only one barely keeping my head above water. And I totally know what you mean about having a different set of issues being a SAHM. When Em was home sick for the week the second week of me going back to work, DH stayed home with her because I couldn't miss work after just returning back. He definitely had a new appreciation for how much work and how exhausting that is!</p> <p>The past couple nights have been a little better. DH has said that he’s willing to do whatever, I just need to more clearly spell out what that is. So the last couple nights have gone like this…we get home and E usually goes down for a short nap. We use this time to get situated from the day, unpack her daycare stuff, go through the mail, and all that kinds of stuff. I’ll then make dinner while DH watches her, we eat dinner with E in her swing next to the table, then I’ve taken her and do play time, bath, etc. while DH does the dishes. Sometime in there one of us washes bottles (most nights) and after she goes to bed I’ll prepare the bottles and my pumping stuff for the next day. It still gives me just an hour at night to myself, but at least it’s a 50/50 split on house chores and baby duty. </p> <p>I’m also trying to simplify dinners and make big batches of things that are freezable at least one Sunday a month. I used to go to more effort in what I prepared but am now opting for quicker, simpler meals. (Background on this…I’ve been somewhat conflicted on going the quick/convenience route that is not the healthiest vs. more time consuming healthy meals. Either way, something has to give.) So what if we have pasta more often than we really should??? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704228 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 07:12:50 +0000 kml636 704228@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tidybee: Welcome!!! I feel the same way you do about working. I'm just on the fence... only in the office 16 hrs per week now. It's so hard to decide! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704218 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 06:57:20 +0000 MamaMoose 704218@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tidybee: I'm in the same situation where we definitely could make it work for me to stay home... But things like retirement and education saving would suffer. I'm not willing to make that financial sacrifice and believe that me working is what's best for our family... But the mommy guilt about not staying home when I technically could is really tough.</p> <p>@scg00387: I should have known hellobee is much too civilized for that crap! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704153 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 03:15:10 +0000 Tidybee 704153@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Another October mom here joining the party! I'm glad I'm not the only WOHM with the feeling that I am juggling a zillion balls and catching each one literally rigt before they hit the ground. I actually can stay home but i haven't been able to take the plunge yet. My work situation is perfect and I have a number of friends there. But I'm not passionate about my work anymore and i dont know if all the stress of getting DD to daycare, maintaining the house, cooking, etc is worth it. DH and I have several conversations a day about me giving notice but I'm really scared to walk away from the job. Financially we're saving about 1200 a month with me working and essentially break even with me not. I like having the extra money to do as we please. But - we're usually too tired to do anything!<br /> Side note - we hired a cleaning service once a month and it is so worth it. We can spend the whole weekend after they come just hanging with DD. we Try to schedule it For<br /> A weekend we have a lot to do so that chores aren't another thing on top of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-704136 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 01:59:23 +0000 kml636 704136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SLR: omg, I don't know how you do it! Wow! Yeah, the once a month thing is a great idea! Thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-703979 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 21:44:28 +0000 immabeetoo 703979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: boo mommy wars! No such thing in the November threads</p> <p>I stay at home which has its own, different set of issues but just wanted to say @SLR holy guacamole that sounds stressful. I really hope your schedule eases up somehow and that your hubby comes around ASAP. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-703767 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 20:05:26 +0000 SLR 703767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kml636: I'm only getting out with my friends once (maybe twice) a month now. But we have started a monthly dinner the first Tuesday of each month going to a different place each time. The fact that it's a standing thing helps in that we know to plan for it. And since it's during the week it's always low-key and I know I'll be home at a decent hour. Perhaps you could do something similar. Or brunches are always good because you could bring her along too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-703743 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 19:54:10 +0000 SLR 703743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Work/life balance has definitely been my biggest challenge so far. (Which is why I have no time to actually post much here anymore, but I do read during my pumping breaks!) I have absolutely no downtime and it's been a huge source of contention with DH. </p> <p>My day starts around 4:45am and the first chance I have to relax at all is around 8pm - at which point I'm exhausted. I feel like I'm carrying the brunt of the workload around the house and it's just getting to be a little too much. I've tried talking to DH about it, but he doesn't fully understand and it ends up that I'm 'overreacting'. Whatever.</p> <p>I would sooo love to stay home, but like @lindseykaye: I'm the high earner and it just doesn't make sense. Plus, DH is helpless in the kitchen, so I don't think he'd be the best at playing Mr. Mom if he were a stay at home dad.</p> <p>Em doesn't STTN and I'm handling all the wakeups. It didn't really bother me so much until the past couple weeks. She's been waking up 1-3x per night and I've been battling a cold - so combined, the exhaustion has reached an all time high. On the plus side though, I've been losing about a 1/2 pound a day due to my lack of taking care of myself!</p> <p>I've also thought about doing a cleaning service 1-2x per month, but my issue is more the clutter/space issues due to all of the baby stuff than the cleanliness. Not sure a maid can help with that.</p> <p>Sigh...we'll get through it girls. (Gotta go pour another glass of wine now.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-702126 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:25:09 +0000 DillonLion 702126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travelgirl1: We started to just sometimes be in the same room, but DH will watch something on his Ipad with headphones, and I'll play on my phone, and it is so nice and relaxing LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-702122 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:24:20 +0000 travelgirl1 702122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@highwire: that is exactly how I feel! I get annoyed by it, I'm sorry I'm not making more time for him but I just need some me time so badly. Glad I'm not the only one! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-702076 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:12:56 +0000 DillonLion 702076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travelgirl1: Oh definitely! I should be appreciative that DH wants to connect and talk with me and watch LOUD movies together, but I just feel so annoyed sometimes and want there to just be peace and quiet after working all day and then taking care of an infant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-702062 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:10:36 +0000 travelgirl1 702062@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I honestly don't know how you working mums do it, I am seriously in awe of your time management. I stay home and just can't figure out how to look after her, cook and clean. I literally can't balance it at all. Then DH is annoyed at me that I don't make enough time for him but I get zero time on my own. Sometimes I just want to sit by myself with no one talking to me and he really doesn't understand that at all. Do you guys ever feel like that? How do you balance it with DH's needs? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-701670 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 09:33:18 +0000 lindseykaye 701670@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LuLu Mom: I would stay home in a heartbeat, too. Unfortunately I'm the high earner in our household while DH is the one with AMAZING benefits. We would lose big time if either one of us chose to stay home.<br /> Plus if DH were to stay home I think I would really resent that he was able to do so. It would be great to have LO looked after by her dad, but it would be hard for me to get over.</p> <p>@kml636: Hiring a cleaning service sounds so awesome. I might just have to look into it for us this year. Right now we have the rest of April without any family obligations (so far) and I'm going to try and 'schedule' some bigger cleaning tasks for us to do over the course of the month. Who knows how it will go though... LO doesn't like to nap on the weekends unless she's in our arms and I always give in because she needs the sleep and I want the snuggles :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-701512 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 08:57:05 +0000 LuLu Mom 701512@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm in October mom crashing the party, I feel this way 95% of the time. I want a clean house, home cooked meals, but with working 9 hour days, I only get a few hours of awake time with LO and I want to spend that time with her! I try to interact with her as much as possible at night while still getting chores done and do most of my cleaning after she's in bed, but sometimes I feel like my head is barely above the water. If it was feasible I would love to stay home, but it just isn't in the budget for us right now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-701278 Tue, 09 Apr 2013 07:37:54 +0000 kml636 701278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lindseykaye: I hear you! For the first time EVER I convinced DH we should hire a maid to do a spring cleaning. I'm actually really excited about it lol! </p> <p>Right now I'm struggling with my social life... I have a lot of friends that don't have kids and I still want them in my life. But they don't always understand. For example they are always inviting me to girls nights or even weekends away and while I do enjoy them, I don't want to be apart from my LO! Hello! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-699552 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 14:05:45 +0000 lindseykaye 699552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I struggle a lot with this, too. It's so hard to prioritize everything that has to get done in a day. Usually it's our housekeeping/chores that fall to the wayside while we spend time with LO or get the day-to-day accomplished. Or I choose between time for myself and time for errands and cleaning. I get about 30-45 minutes at home before DH and LO arrive and I can use them to shower or I can fold laundry or hit up the store. Usually I try to get things done rather than just take that time to relax.<br /> Example - our screen door broke weeks ago and all we really need to do is drill some new holes and put in anchors so we can re-install it. Maybe this weekend? The after work hours that we used to use to accomplish little tasks like this are completely gone.</p> <p>I feel okay at work, with how much I'm getting done and my schedule/productivity but things have been pretty steady since I returned. I'm afraid of when things get busy/crazy and what will happen to my sanity and my ability to (sort of) balance it all. We may eat dinner after LO goes to bed, so around 9pm like you @MamaMoose but I'm still able to meal plan, grocery shop and cook for us most of the time... for now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-699461 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:40:50 +0000 DillonLion 699461@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Chopped a good 6 inches off my hair this weekend and feel like a new woman. Halleluyah! That horse tail needed TO GO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-690744 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 09:25:27 +0000 DillonLion 690744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kml636: Ha same. My time with her is time with her. Nothing else. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-690450 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 08:28:41 +0000 kml636 690450@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's so hard. That sucks your work isn't more understanding. I totally admit, the other weekend I was gone from her a lot and I couldn't bear the thought of putting her in daycare. I totally called in sick! When I do get her on her daycare days, I just try to baby wear and cuddle her because I MISS her! So working out or doing any kind of real chores is out of the question. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-682381 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 14:52:07 +0000 DillonLion 682381@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: Seems like something always has to move down on the priority list. There just aren't enough ours in the day! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-682308 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 14:21:09 +0000 MamaMoose 682308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have been wanting to start a thread about this but I didn't want to get into mommy wars between the SAHMs and the WOHMs. But I just don't have enough hours in the day to do the things I need to do. For instance... getting laundry done is nearly impossible when the baby is sleeping because the washer/dryer is right outside her bedroom. But I don't have enough time during the day when she is awake to get it done. So I cram it all in on the weekend, strategicly planning switching loads around awake times. I've been lucky that work is super understanding about me doing whatever I need to do to accomodate the baby but I try hard not to push it (for instance we did her 4 month check up on Good Friday since I had the day off from work). So I've not had issues at work but I feel like things at home just keep getting further and further behind. When I was on maternity leave the house was always clean, the fridge was always stocked, dinner was cooked at dinner time (rather than eating at 9pm like we have been doing). It's tough. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/no-12-mamas-worklife-balance#post-682263 Mon, 01 Apr 2013 14:00:23 +0000 DillonLion 682263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How are you ladies balancing being a mom and the rest of life?</p> <p>Today has been rough. Baby was in a bad mood before shots, and then was totally traumatized once she got them. I wanted to just stay home and cuddle her but instead dropped her off to daycare and flew off to work. Then when I got to work I got a "talking to" about working faster and more efficiently since I am out of the office so much lately (stomach flu last week, well check for baby this morning). </p> <p>So hard to balance everything. Tear. </p>