https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Apr 2026 13:02:47 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2302532 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 15:19:43 +0000 sarac 2302532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think you need to get over anything. Forcing a child to try to potty train when they're not ready is a terrible, awful idea. My niece was forced like that and she rebelled by smearing poop on walls, by peeing on her parents shoes, etc etc. At 4.5 she's still barely trained, and not at all at night. My older daughter just basically trained herself at 2.5, with no drama. My second one will do the same, whenever she's ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2302425 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 14:17:22 +0000 daniellemybelle 2302425@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just finished Oh Crap and we will begin training this weekend. For me, I found her tone a little aggressive. I think it is just her style of writing, though. If you really just listen to what she is saying - it's more or less the method of potty training folks did for decades. To me, it is really common sense and not as "high stakes" as her tone makes it sounds. Basically, her thing is to commit and not to waffle or second guess yourself because it isn't easy. </p> <p>I also really like what she has to say about learning your child's cues and helping to teach them to listen to their own body and eventually self-initiate with your support. Again, her kind of abrasive tone doesn't make this part as clear as I wish it was but this is one thing that I really like about her method versus the typical 3 day potty training where you are constantly prompting and putting them on the potty.</p> <p>Good luck with whatever path you take! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2302232 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 12:30:31 +0000 Foodnerd81 2302232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: I'm in the same boat as you- our LOs are about the same age (26 months) and she shows some interest, but not really. I read Oh Crap and felt like I was going to miss the window too, especially since we are having a new baby in December. I was all geared up to start this weekend. But... I'm too tired and impatient and I think my impatience will ultimately be worse for potty training than waiting too long. So I'm back to waiting until she seems really really ready and crossing my fingers that that happens. If it doesn't we will reevaluate in the spring. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301985 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:57:16 +0000 Rockies11 2301985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't like Oh Crap at all! We do "potty learning" based on this: <a href="http://www.ahaparenting.com/Ages-stages/toddlers/easy-toilet-potty-training" rel="nofollow">http://www.ahaparenting.com/Ages-stages/toddlers/easy-toilet-potty-training</a></p> <p>ETA: I think the notion that there's some magic window is total nonsense. I feel like potty training is like sleep - there's a lot of stuff that says if you don't do the right thing for their sleep they won't develop properly and will never sleep. And ultimately that all bears out to be untrue - kids just sleep how they sleep and respond to what they respond to. So you may as well just do something that works for you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301957 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:35:30 +0000 BananaPancakes 2301957@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: My son is almost 3.5, and we just trained him in August using the Oh Crap method. I will say, we started around 18 months, just loosely, and he would go now and again when we sat him on the potty. Just before his 2nd birthday, he even used the little potty to go #2 all by himself. I thought for sure he'd just decide one day that he was done with diapers, and that it would just happen naturally. Then he turned 3, then started approaching 3.5, and I finally decided for him that it had to happen. I didn't think the book was aggressive in the method, but it did make me feel like a shitty parent because she kept stressing how he HAD to be trained ASAP because he was so old. Now that we're past it, and he's already night-trained and everything, I wish I hadn't been so hard on myself, but I also wish I had admitted to myself that he was ready ages ago, he just needed a little push from us. He was never going to train himself. But there also seems to be no lasting effects of waiting so long, like she harps about in the book. He's doing fabulous, even though he was older than 3. In fact, I think it went so quick and painless (never upset, no crying) because he was so much older and really really ready. I think I just needed to be ready for it, too. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301953 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:34:38 +0000 MamaCate 2301953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: happy to help! 😀 I was really worried about potty training for some reason but it went fine and I think the key was letting LO decide when she was ready. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301947 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:31:47 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2301947@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaCate: That's an awesome post, thank you so much! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301942 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:27:29 +0000 MamaCate 2301942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree that you are more likely to be successful if you wait for LO to show readiness. You are doing a lot of the right things to help get used to the idea. We did a lot of talking about and familiarizing with the potty and then did 3 day boot camp to make the full switch to underwear.</p> <p>Mrs. Jacks had a post on this "toilet learning" approach that I found helpful:<br /> <a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2013/08/28/potty-training-versus-toilet-learning-what-is-the-difference/" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2013/08/28/potty-training-versus-toilet-learning-what-is-the-difference/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301923 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 09:05:44 +0000 Mrs. Twine 2301923@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this idea that we have to "do" something is a bit misleading. I mean, you can do something. You can do any one of the many methods out there, and if your child is already basically ready, or at least receptive, you will be successful. But the majority of it is on the child. Just like with eating, we adults can "do" a lot of stuff, but if the child isn't having it, it just isn't going to happen. I think you're right to want to make sure that she's ready and not push too hard. I think if the method doesn't sit right with you, it's not a good fit. You're already doing all the right things. You're helping her learn about her body so she can start to be aware of the cues that will eventually let her know to head for the potty. You've made a potty available to her to use. You're respecting her autonomy and letting her interest set the tone. You're doing great. Lorelei is just now in underwear at 3.5. Quite late compared to Ellie, but it was so easy. For a long time she just insisted she wanted diapers. It was a little hard sometimes for me because I had the feeling that she could totally be in underwear if she just tried. But, whatever. She wasn't ready and it seemed like forcing it would just cause issues on both ends, and I doubt that conflict would have made me feel any better. But then one day she just decided she wanted to use the potty and that was it. No particular method, no rules; she was just ready and so she did it. We did end up having her go underwearless for a while because for a little while if she was wearing anything remotely like a cloth diaper/trainers she would sometimes just pee because she didn't understand that the underwear weren't absorbent. She was frustrated, and when we tried going without the underwear it seemed to help. Now she can wear underwear no problem. She still has the rare accident, but she's doing great. You'll get there! Maybe check your library and see if there are any books that stand out to you if you want to do a more structured approach. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301895 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 08:40:04 +0000 Mamasig 2301895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't done that method and my son isn't potty trained yet, so I guess take this all with a grain of salt :happy: I'm similar to you in that I'm not big on "training." I kind of feel like my boys will do things when they are developmentally ready and I don't want to force them on my time table. </p> <p>DS1 was similar to your daughter- minimal interest in potty training. But I felt like he showed signs that it was time to train. Well, he was not into it all. Totally freaked trying to put him on the little potty or big potty. And not into it at school either. Positive peer pressure did not help. Treats didn't help. Every so often he would try but nothing consistent. Well, he's made slow progress. He'll sit on it now without freaking out. But really, I've just decided to go at his pace. He'll get there and me trying to rush it won't help. </p> <p>I really think it just depends on the kid and only you know if it's right for them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-loving-oh-crap-other-suggestions#post-2301888 Fri, 25 Sep 2015 08:34:37 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2301888@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I started reading the Oh Crap book since it's so well received and loved and I'm a bit freaked out by it. LO is 28 months and not really showing a lot of readiness but the book's idea of "how is she going to be ready if she doesn't know anything about it" made sense to me. So I kept going and read about the method and it feels incredibly aggressive to me. I'm not sure if I'm just not ready for this myself (which I understand I need to get over) but I'm really worried about forcing the kid into something she's not developmentally ready for and creating more problems down the line. She's curious about the potty and has even used it a few times (once by asking herself, right before bathtime), but beyond that, she's perfectly fine with diapers, doesn't care if she's dirty, doesn't ask to be changed (and in fact resists changes), and doesn't really sit very long on the potty unless we read to her or distract her in other ways. </p> <p>Am I being too sensitive? I admit I'm a bit of a wimp when it comes to "training" in anything, but I don't want to miss the boat on a good time frame either and encounter even more resistance. </p> <p>Also, do folks have recommendations on other readings about potty training? I don't really consider Brazelton valid given his connection to Pampers, but if others have found other books/readings useful, I'd love tips.</p> <p>Thanks! </p>