https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 06:00:37 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067729 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 22:41:19 +0000 catomd00 2067729@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds normal to me, but maybe this office isn't a good fit for your needs and expectations. You also won't get an nt scan if you get panorama. You need to be your own advocate and take charge in your care by asking questions. Practice now for hen baby arrives and you need to advocate for them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067510 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 21:09:05 +0000 78h2o 2067510@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrscobee: I think what you've described sounds pretty standard... not sure if that's good or bad. I know I wished I had gotten more info/attention, esp. with my first pregnancy and first pregnancy after a loss. </p> <p>I will say though that my doctor and the perinatologist I saw for the NT both thought it was a really good idea to do both the NT and the free cell DNA testing (Harmony, Panorama, etc.). The NT can pick up things the other test cannot, such as cardiac issues, spina bifida, brain abnormalities, etc.... things that would likely be found at 20 weeks, but sometimes it's good to know earlier if it's an issue that could lead you to terminate OR if you might require in-utero surgery or another kind of intervention. The perinatologist complimented my OB (from another practice) on referring me for both and said she felt it was the best of both worlds. I did forgo the sequential screen blood work that is usually preformed along with the NT scan, since that would be redundant with the DNA test. </p> <p>Even though I am &gt;35, my insurance did not cover Harmony for some reason. Harmony reduced the fee from $1,400 to $99 (which they had said they would do if it wasn't covered). The NT was fully covered. </p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067365 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 19:50:04 +0000 Iced Tea 2067365@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Even if it is pretty common to be treated that way, I wouldn't be comfortable with it either. You don't know everything about prenatal care and are relying on them to help guide you. </p> <p>I have mostly seen midwives (though had a couple of appointments with OBs), and like the care much better. Appointments are not rushed. The midwives are happy to sit and discuss anything and everything. I've had appointments that were 45 minutes long because we had a lot to discuss. OB appointments were 5 minutes (after waiting for an hour--I was not happy). </p> <p>I think it is good that you are meeting with the high risk OB, so you will at least know whether they have any special advice for you. And I don't think you are "just freaking out" about your current OB. It sounds like you are not suited to the style of office they are running. I think you will feel a lot better if you seek out an office that better meets your needs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067342 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 19:35:35 +0000 MamaBehr 2067342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrscobee: for what it is worth, I'm RH- and had no idea until I was half way through my first pregnancy. I had early bleeding with it, but didn't get the rogham shot because I didn't know I was RH- at that time. It isn't a big deal. At all. I have had three healthy pregnancies, resulting in three healthy children. You will get a shot at 20 weeks and again after the baby of the baby is RH+ (my middle was negative like me!). I did receive the shot at like 8 weeks with my second and third because of early bleeding, but like I said, no big deal.<br /> It's a painful shot that is more of a pain in the butt (pun intended!), but nothing to be freaked about. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067178 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:33:22 +0000 mrscobee 2067178@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks so much for all your thoughtful responses so far! I am getting so much good insight and information, and I am so thankful!</p> <p>@sarac: That is crazy about your sister and exactly what I was pissed about - that if I had bled, I would have been clueless and the same thing would have happened to me. I am so glad your sister had good luck on her side in that situation!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067173 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:29:43 +0000 charlotte 2067173@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see both sides. @ my first OB they did not communicate much either and I definitely felt like it was my responsibility to remind the staff of things and ask about testing, etc. It was frustrating from time to time but not that big of a deal because it was relatively uncomplicated.</p> <p>BUT...we moved states and my new OB's office is SO MUCH BETTER! I didn't even realize what I was missing but now that I'm with them I expect a lot more. They gave me a big packet at the 1st appointment with all of the possible testing and other information laid out and my actual OB went through all of the info with me....it was really nice and organized. I don't think it will hurt to stay but if you want to look for another you could definitely find someone who you like more.</p> <p>Hoping the high-risk will be much more helpful and you won't have to worry about it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067148 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:21:02 +0000 sarac 2067148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can tell you that bungling the RH- issue is common and awful. My RH- sister switched to a different practice for her second pregnancy. She experienced bleeding at 5 weeks, and called in for info. They told her to just call back if it didn't stop, which she did. She bled on and off for several weeks, at which point she went in, and they said 'Oh my, it looks like you're RH-! I guess you need a rhogam shot!' After she'd been bleeding for weeks. With a known RH+ husband and first pregnancy. It's only good luck that she didn't get sensitized to RH antigens and an entire other set of big problems. </p> <p>In other words, that's a common issue, and it sucks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067141 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:18:02 +0000 Madison43 2067141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For an uncomplicated pregancy, this sounds totally normal. I remember being taken aback by it too, especially because I was coming from months of near daily appointments with an RE. I was also shocked that most appointments were like 5 mins long. My OB stressed that pregancy is not a disease, so assuming there are no complications, there's not a ton to communicate about. That said, he ( and I think most OBs) was happy to take my call whenever I had questions, so I just called him whenever I was feeling out of the loop. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067123 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:08:44 +0000 spaniellove 2067123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can chime in about how they're communicating with you, because I actually switched practices because of something like this. In the beginning of my pregnancy I was part of a large group practice and it was unsettling to me that I was seeing a different nurse every time and they weren't even getting the details consistent. After 3 miscarriages and IF, that wasn't okay with me. Although they at least knew to send me to the MFM and were nice enough to bring me in every 2 weeks for an u/s, I switched to a much smaller practice where I was guaranteed to see a dr every 2 weeks and they were much better versed in medical knowledge. </p> <p>Given that you have risk factors that you need communication about, you might want to consider whether you should come up with a way to get all the details you need from them or find another practice that does a better job of coordinating your care. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067109 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 17:01:18 +0000 mrscobee 2067109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I have begun taking more charge of the situation and just made an appointment with my high risk OB! Whether I need them or not, I don't know, but at least now I can talk to them and they can help me decide. I am feeling better already... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067016 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:22:17 +0000 GreenThumb 2067016@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also changed practices after the first two appointments with the original OB's office I chose. I sort of felt the same way you do - shouldn't they be communicating more? When I did meet the OB at my second appointment, I asked her about meeting the other docs in the practice in case one of them might deliver me, and when she said it could be one of 25+ different docs (in a university hospital setting) I switched to a private practice with 5 OBs - all of whom I met. Also, my OB and her nurse were great - I talked to them a million times during my pregnancy! Not that I'm saying there isn't a place for advocating for yourself, I just think there is a lot to learn as a first time mom and they should be there to guide you along the way! Don't be afraid to look for another doctor even mid-pregnancy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2067005 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:19:04 +0000 mrscobee 2067005@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Eko: Thank you for sharing your story and another perspective! I am glad to know your care is a lot better now! I think I have a hard time knowing how much self-advocacy is necessary. I do feel like it is reasonable to have a minimum expectation, but I can acknowledge that my expectations may be too high. If I continue to remain uncomfortable, it is possible I would consider other options, even if it is after I get through this pregnancy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066985 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:11:55 +0000 Eko 2066985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a somewhat different scenario happen for me, but from reading your story, many of the underlining concerns are the same. I saw an infertility specialist up until 8w due to my history of miscarriages, and had many beta tests and an ultrasound done. The specialist was part of a corporate medical association and my regular OB was affiliated with the same one. So once I got into a 'safe zone' I was told to transfer back to my OB. That practice I primarily saw a mid-wife and only saw my doctor on more benchmark appointments, like NT scan. I guess long-story short, when I tried to speak with my OB to get appointments scheduled, etc. no one was that helpful or provided much information. As a result, I decided to switch OB's at 10w. </p> <p>I think that what other bees have mentioned is accurate regarding the amount of ultrasounds you get done, etc. However, with switching offices, my care is a lot better, more transparent, and helpful. They are very upfront with what is going to happen, when, etc. I also now only see a doctor and don't see a mid-wife, which I prefer. I don't think that someone should have to self-advocate to get decent care. I think that if you are not feeling comfortable with who you are seeing and have other options, I would look into those. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066980 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:09:31 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2066980@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds pretty normal to me. I don't see my OB or have any ultrasounds until 12 weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066959 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:59:11 +0000 mrs. tictactoe 2066959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, it sounds pretty normal, especially if you have an HMO. I have found that I really need to take charge of my care and advocate for myself to make sure I get what I need. It isn't always the doctor's fault, but there are a lot of hoops everyone has to jump through and nobody is going to be a better advocate for yourself than you. If you want the NT scan, just ask them about it. For me, they send a referral for the NT scan, they do not do it in the office. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066955 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:57:33 +0000 mrscobee 2066955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Torchwood: Thanks so much for your response! I may have to look into a midwife - I just feel like I need more support than what they are giving me currently!! And it isn't what I expected, so it is obviously causing me anxiety. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066952 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:55:32 +0000 mrscobee 2066952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I don't know that much about it, so I have not self-advocated yet. I figured I would talk to them about it next Friday. I know it kind of tests for the same thing as the genetic screening, so maybe I won't do it. I was just expecting them to talk thoroughly through all of this with me. But from everyone's responses thus far, it seems like maybe I was just expecting too much and had a freak out moment. No one has ever been sure whether the regular OB or high-risk OB should take the lead, which is part of my frustration, but maybe I should have asked more directly.<br /> @Ms.Badger: I got the Panorama even though I doubt insurance will cover it, so I might forego the NT, since I am running out of time and have nothing scheduled. I am just surprised I am having to know all this, and they didn't bring it up much, but again, maybe I was expecting too much. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066949 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:54:29 +0000 Torchwood 2066949@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt the same after my early appointments with an OB. I do think they should have told you about the RH-, but maybe they assumed you'd call them about any bleeding so they'd tell you to get the shot then? Also, I'm not sure what te NT scan would show you that the Panorama screening won't already cover. I was told that since I did Panorama they wouldn't do the NT. Also, as mentioned the NT seems common here on HB, but it's not standard practice with most OB's. And lastly, I've been a million times more happy with the time spent with me and the communication with me since I started seeing midwives. I don't know if that's an option for you, or something you'd even be interested in, but it's definitely a much better experience all around for me. (And because I am potentially higher risk, they're having me see the MFM OB for my anatomy scan.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066943 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:50:39 +0000 Ms.Badger 2066943@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You only need the DNA test (Maternit21 or Panorama) or the NT test as they are screens for the same thing. If your medical condition doesn't warrent covering the DNA test, I would call your OB office and schedule a NT if you want it instead. It needs to be done by 13 weeks i think (maybe 14?) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066940 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:49:54 +0000 yoursilverlining 2066940@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, I think it sounds like they gave you options, and you need to follow up with patient self-advocacy – it’s unclear what follow-up you took from your post. When they said the NT scan is “up to you”, did you call back or respond confirming that it was something you did indeed want and ask about scheduling? Not every OB practice can perform an NT scan, in fact in my state, there are only something like 2 offices that are equipped to do NT scans, and they are the high-risk maternal/fetal medicine offices affiliated with hospitals. My OB presented NT scan as an option, and then gave me a referral to MFM for them/me to set up the appointment.</p> <p>I didn’t have the MaterniT21 test so can’t speak to that part, but can add that we did have other genetic testing done and all of that testing was also done by FMF and not my OB’s office and similar to the NT scan - I was responsible for working with MFM to set up that appointment - not my OB's office. </p> <p>When you had the pre-conception consult with the high-risk OB, did they suggest you stick with a regular OB once you became pregnant? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066932 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:46:48 +0000 mrscobee 2066932@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LuLu Mom: @Mamasig: Thanks, ladies for reading that long, long post and for providing some reassurance!<br /> @LuLu Mom: Definitely some new mom anxiety here!<br /> @Mamasig: You are right, I am thinking exactly "this is it?!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066927 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:45:12 +0000 Mamasig 2066927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also two ultrasounds (dating and anatomy scan) are what was customary at my doctors office. You got more if there was a medical reason. Also, they give me some info on standard testing but left the decision to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066922 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:42:39 +0000 Mamasig 2066922@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I think you are expecting a lot. After my 1st couple of appointments, I remember thinking - wait this is it? And I only really heard back about tests if it was something bad, like having GD. Other than that, it really isn't that much interaction if you don't require or ask for it. But given your possible high risk status, I would definitely ask more questions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066919 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:42:04 +0000 LuLu Mom 2066919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Take a deep breathe :) </p> <p>1. I think you have new mom anxiety, it's common, I was right there with you. Your visits sound very similar to mine, my office makes it very clear that the bloodwork/additional testing/ect. is up to me on whether we choose to go beyond the regular, I think they are trying to not pressure you either way. I think if you want guidance you should have asked the doctor.<br /> 2. I did not see my normal doctor until I was out of the first trimester, so that does not seem that uncommon to me, especially if you are in an office that the doctor's works together.<br /> 3. The two ultrasounds are pretty standard at most offices unless they notice something to be more high risk. I think because of your condition you should contact your high risk doctor, they would be able to give you the attention/clarification better that you need for the additional screenings, ect. that it seems you are looking for. After meeting with the high risk you can then decide if you feel it's necessary to move forward with both doctors. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-much-communication-from-ob-is-this-normal#post-2066877 Thu, 12 Feb 2015 15:21:07 +0000 mrscobee 2066877@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ETA: Warning - sorry this is so long!!</p> <p>Hi! I was hoping all you helpful, experienced bees could tell me whether my perceived lack of communication from my OB's office is normal and I am overreacting, or whether I should be frustrated. </p> <p>So, a little about my situation and what has been going on:<br /> -I am 11 weeks today.<br /> -I have a condition that makes me potentially very high risk, but also could be okay.<br /> -Thus far, the pregnancy has gone smoothly (knock on wood).<br /> -I had a pre-conception appointment with a high-risk OB, whom I have not yet seen.</p> <p>-I had a confirmation of pregnancy appointment at 4-5 weeks, where I met with nurse practitioner to discuss plan of care. NP mentioned I could get diagnostic genetic testing (MaterniT21) if I wanted it, and told me to just ask if I decide to. Told me calling high risk doc was up to me.<br /> -We heard the heartbeat at 8 week appointment. After the ultrasound, I saw a doctor, but not my doctor. I asked him about the MaterniT21 test. He ordered routine blood work and said I could go get it done any time within the next 4 weeks. Said calling high-risk doc was up to me.</p> <p>- I got a call from a nurse saying my MaterniT21 order was at the front desk ready to be picked up. Said I could take test anytime, and that they take my insurance (not the same as insurance covering it).<br /> -I showed up to pick up MaterniT21, but it was actually Panorama. I was thrown. I know they are basically the same thing, but there are slight differences. I then started asking the receptionist questions, and she got the nurse. I asked the nurse where I go for testing, when I can take the test, and whether it is same as MaterniT21. She didn’t know so she consulted with doc and came back and said I can go to a lab anytime between 10-14 weeks to take the test, and it is the exact same thing. She asked if I wanted to speak to a genetic counselor, and I declined and took the kit for testing the next day. She also said I should get my other blood work done ASAP.</p> <p>-I went to get my other blood work done, and found out I am RH-, which I now know is no big deal, but only found out via my hospital's online posting system. It seems like #1, they should have told me to go get this blood work done ASAP, and #2, should have called me to tell me I have RH- blood and that is no big deal, but in the event of bleeding I should go get the Rhogam shot.<br /> -I'm coming upon my 12 week appointment. Had no idea what the plan was, so just called to see if they will be doing ultrasound, and they said no. They said standard for their office is ultrasound at 8 and 20 weeks only, unless there is a reason to do more. No one has ever discussed the NT screening with me, even though it is about the time you would do that.</p> <p>I know at the end of the day, the involvement of my high risk OB and whether I do genetic testing and NT screen is up to me. But I find the following so weird that after 2 doctor's appointment and 11 weeks:</p> <p>-I haven't seen my regular doctor yet.<br /> -Until I called today, I had no idea how many ultrasounds I would be having or when they would be.<br /> -I have no guidance on whether to start involving the high risk doctor and to what extent.<br /> -No one knew anything about the genetic testing, and I in fact received misinformation.<br /> -I have not been offered all of the options, including the NT screening.</p> <p>What do you all think? Am I overreacting? </p>