https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 22 Jun 2026 16:40:56 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-129964 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 13:55:39 +0000 LuLu Mom 129964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: That's nice that he's still putting you and baby first! I like the excuses he came up with, I think it's sweet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-129738 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 12:07:14 +0000 winniebee 129738@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, I encouraged him to go, but he's not going! A variety of things - far away from me, hassle to get his boat in the water, not going to be great weather. Etc etc. So, no worries! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125788 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 07:07:24 +0000 autumnlove 125788@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would encourage him to go! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125759 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 05:42:47 +0000 winniebee 125759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lemondrop: @cyneswith: There's not really any closer alternative since his fishing boat and all his gear are up at the lakehouse! And there aren't any lakes around where we live. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125749 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 05:24:36 +0000 pastemoo 125749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cyneswith: I agree! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125740 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 04:13:10 +0000 SugarplumsMom 125740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would feel so bad and tell him to go. I'd have a taxi as a backup and we can meet each other at the hospital. It wouldn't be the ideal birthing situation in my mind, but I'd probably be too stubborn to admit it to him. But you should both talk about worst-case scenarios (just in case). </p> <p>That way you're both on the same page about him being away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125705 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 01:19:50 +0000 cyneswith 125705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Tell DH that you are OK with him going. He's probably having the exact same degree of hesitation you are. But, I agree with Lemondrop - if there's a closer alternative, that'd be a better option. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125704 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 01:19:38 +0000 SAHM0811 125704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For a first time mom, it would definitely be unusual if from start to finish you had the baby in 3 hours... So on that alone, I'd feel okay if my mom were nearby and DH went 2-3 hours away at 35 weeks. Just be sure you continue to really, really take it easy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125702 Tue, 17 Apr 2012 01:11:09 +0000 lemondrop 125702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is there anywhere closer that he could go just for the day? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125467 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 19:23:19 +0000 winniebee 125467@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: ok that makes me feel a little better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125462 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 19:21:40 +0000 winniebee 125462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: gah this is what scares me!We would both be devastated if he for some reason wasn't here v</p> <p>We talked about it tonight and we are going to play it by ear - we will see how I feel on Friday then decide. If he goes my mom will come tend to me : ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125445 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 19:09:17 +0000 cvbee 125445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Today someone JUST told me a story about their friend who went into labour at 34 weeks when her husband was 4 hours away on a canoe trip. He didn't even get the text message until he got back to shore. He missed the birth of his first child. BUT this story is more extreme than the 2 hours away fishing that your DH would be doing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125443 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 19:05:49 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 125443@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would definitely tell him to go, as everyone else has said.<br /> My DH is going to another state this weekend and I will be 37 weeks... I am just believing I won't go into labor (which I am positive I won't... I think bebe is happy in there for a while). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125416 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 18:47:22 +0000 pastemoo 125416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Tell him to go -- and have someone over at your house to tend to your every need so you can be on EXTRA STRICT bedrest without dying of boredom. 35 weeks is better than 36! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125246 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 16:47:17 +0000 MsLipGloss 125246@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@WinnieBee: I second what @AuntPol wrote. I bet everything would be fine, but he may not be able to relax and enjoy himself if he was worried about you the whole time. If it were me, I would probably ask him not to go, just to play it safe. Anxiety has a way of monkeying with things. </p> <p>But, there is no such thing as a wrong decision in this case . . . as long as it is right for the two of you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125183 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 16:01:33 +0000 aunt pol 125183@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had two hospitals to choose from for birth. One in the middle of the city, the other regional, on the outskirts of a large town. I was talking to SIL about the pros and cons of both, and I mentioned the travel time- to get to the regional one would be 40 minutes at pretty much any time of the day, because we wouldn't have to account for traffic. The other is 40 minutes plus extra if rush hour travelling. She laughed at me and said for my first, I'd probably have time to walk to the hospital if need be, first labours usually taking so long.<br /> I say tell him Go, provided that you have help at home, that he is contactable where he is, and that you agree to contact him the moment things begin to happen, if they do. You seem to have all that covered, so why not! The only variable I can see is, will he relax and actually enjoy the break or will he be worrying about you the whole time? Because that would be kind of a waste. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-125121 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:34:50 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 125121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: My labor lasted 14 1/2 hours. My water broke 2 hours after my contractions started, and it was another 12 hours before I could even start pushing. I know you're thinking it's probably Murphy's Law, and I would too, but I think you would have plenty of time before you *had* to get to the hospital. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124834 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 14:01:36 +0000 Mrsbells 124834@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Logically I know that labor does last longer than 3 hours for most people, and I know its likely you wont go into labor while he is away BUT I like to err on the side of caution, if I were in your shoes I wouldnt want my husband to go, he can always go fishing after the baby comes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124814 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 13:56:53 +0000 Ms.SK 124814@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ winniebee, how funny that I told my husband to go fishing this weekend : )<br /> I know how tough this bedrest is on both of u, if he can get a small break it would be nice. I like your idea of Fri. To Sun. Morning. My husband fishes early so it may be possible for him to even get some time in Sun. Am and be back to u by noon . </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124803 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 13:52:31 +0000 heffalump 124803@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: In that case, I'd feel good about letting him go. Especially since it will probably be the last time for a while that he will get that kind of relaxing in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124786 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 13:46:24 +0000 winniebee 124786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for all your suggestions!!</p> <p>@artbee: The cell service up there is good, so that shouldn't be an issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124637 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 12:35:31 +0000 heffalump 124637@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that as long as you have someone that can take you to the hospital if needed, he should go. But I'd also be worried that he won't have phone service..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124609 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 12:24:16 +0000 Goldilocks1107 124609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd encourage him to go - and maybe see if your mom can stay with you for the entire weekend so he'd know you weren't all by yourself.<br /> If he's hesitant, remind him it might be the last time he gets to go for awhile since you'll have a little one to take care of! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124502 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:49:53 +0000 winniebee 124502@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PBandBaseball: I think he'd enjoy himself : ) </p> <p>@regberadaisy: She won't really say! I think she's careful not to since I'm already 1.5 cm dilated and 50% effaced (could be more, I haven't been checked since 31 wks)....</p> <p>@mrbee: I know : ( I just feel like whatever decision we make will turn out to be the wrong one. </p> <p>I might tell him to go Friday night and then plan to come back first thing Sunday morning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124499 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:48:14 +0000 Andrea 124499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be cautious and not have him go. :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124488 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:43:53 +0000 mrbee 124488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: Odds are, there will be no labor and everything works out fine! Or labor will start and he will make it back in plenty of time!</p> <p>I guess I am just really cautious about this stuff... like you said, it's just scary to think that he would miss the birth. Or that he wouldn't be there to support you when you started labor! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124487 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:42:38 +0000 regberadaisy 124487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee:<br /> What is your doctor's opinion given your history? Does s/he think you have stabilized?<br /> For my husband that was the biggest thing no matter what I Told him. He wanted to hear from the doctor that the chances of me going into labor in the next 36 hours was slim to none. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124484 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:41:23 +0000 PBandBaseball 124484@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that if you have people available who you would be comfortable with if something did happen, he should be ok being 2-3 hours away. Would he enjoy himself if he went, or do you think he would be too worried about you at home? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124483 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:40:53 +0000 winniebee 124483@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I guess part of me is thinking that I don't know any first time moms whose labor progressed that quickly? I know many second time moms whose labor went much quicker, though. But how terrible would it be if he missed the birth of his son!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/not-sure-what-to-tell-dh#post-124474 Mon, 16 Apr 2012 11:37:16 +0000 mrbee 124474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bee went into labor at 5, and her contractions were so bad by the time we got to the hospital at 6:45 that she needed a wheelchair to get out of the car!</p> <p><a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2011/10/21/olives-birth-story/" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2011/10/21/olives-birth-story/</a></p> <p>I am probably being overly cautious here, based on Bee delivering at 35 weeks and having her labor progress fairly quickly (the epidural slowed it down nicely though).</p> <p>I dunno, I guess I wouldn't want to have your SO racing back from the lakehouse in his car. It would just be a whole extra level of stress to an experience that's already pretty stressful. Sounds like I'm in the minority here though! </p>