https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 28 Apr 2026 01:41:03 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout/page/2#post-906649 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 13:44:50 +0000 aprk 906649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Are you able to talk to someone about how this situation is affecting you? Parenting a newborn is tough even with the best support. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout/page/2#post-906647 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 13:41:35 +0000 immabeetoo 906647@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: that simply sounds awful. I can't imagine parenting with someone so selfish and rude. I hope things change soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout/page/2#post-906607 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:47:42 +0000 Mrs. Blue 906607@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: Omg, I would hit the freakin' fan. You need to have a serious sit down with him when you're not both frustrated and talk about how unreasonable his behavior is. You are a saint for not completely flipping out on him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout/page/2#post-906600 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:42:14 +0000 boiledpnut 906600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any advice. I just want to send you big hugs! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout/page/2#post-906581 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:24:51 +0000 lomom 906581@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsmate: thanks, I hope things get better as lo gets older and as DH continues to adjust to fatherhood. He's got a big shock coming when I go back to work and he's going to have to pitch in more... I hope the ignoring me bit is just him being preoccupied with the trip and that he straightens up. I'm just so frustrated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906562 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:10:49 +0000 mrsmate 906562@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@nana87: @sorrycharlie: yes, it's his ignoring you that bugs me the most. It's so disrespectful!</p> <p>My own father was like this. He was a good dad but a terrible husband. Throughout my life I witnessed him tuning out my mom. She's no picnic to deal with (very needy, emotional) but as I've grown older Ive started to think he drove her crazy and made her this way.</p> <p>@septemberlove: I hope you can work it out bc you deserve a true partner </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906558 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 12:05:21 +0000 lomom 906558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sorrycharlie: I'm not getting through to him though. That's why I say it's a communication issue. Or he's just a total and complete ass and choosing to ignore me. I don't know. The blowout (not stopping when I asked) and AC thing was him being an ass. The not helping thing is communication. I don't think (or at least, I hope) that he just doesn't realize when I need help. And I should probably be more clear and assertive rather than snapping when he doesn't help. It's just exhausting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906547 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 11:55:01 +0000 sorrycharlie 906547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@nana87: I completely agree on the communication point - he's deliberately choosing to act the way he is. At least from what I read on the post, it seems as if @septemberlove is communicating totally clearly! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906541 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 11:48:30 +0000 nana87 906541@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>none of your husband's behavior here sounds okay. we don't have a lo yet but we have taken a lot of road trips with our dogs, and if dh was ever this inconsiderate about their needs in the car I'd be livid, and it'd be so much worse if it was a human baby! but no, he's always willing to stop to let the furbabies take care of their business and drink some water, and when one of our dogs gets carsick he's always equally involved in caring for her and cleaning up. and heck, I don't think I could wait 6 hours myself without stopping to pee!</p> <p>also, it doesn't really sound to me like it's a communication issue: it sounds like you are communicating to him what you need from him and he's choosing to ignore you anyway. that's a deeper problem than communication. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906500 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 10:57:58 +0000 lomom 906500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mewtill: my mom wants to stay out of it and let us resolve it. I know it's a communication issue, exacerbated by lack of sleep on both our parts but that doesn't make it any less frustrating. I know I'm not innocent in all this. I shouldn't have snapped at him and I need to be more vocal about what he should be doing to help. But between the blowout, the gas comment, and wanting me to pump whole someone else gave lo a bottle of formula... I'm just at my wits end. </p> <p>@sorrycharlie: I hope he gets a clue. Now that you say that about Teen Mom... He's kind of like Ryan. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906496 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 10:54:32 +0000 Cherrybee 906496@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Big, big, big hugs. Everything that needs to be said about your DH has been said so I will save my rant for my poor, not-to-blame-on-this-occasion husband when he gets home (I'll take it out on him, for you, how's that?) but what I will say is this - it's a darn good job you've worked so hard to get breastfeeding working out, huh? Imagine how rancid the hot car would smell if your poor baby was sat in formula-crap for an hour! Oh blimey! You 1 - your DH 0 on that score! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906481 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 10:37:34 +0000 sorrycharlie 906481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I don't even have words for him. If you were my sister, I'd threaten to report him to dcf and see how he reacted to that. He sounds like he should be one of the dads on Teen Mom. I'm sorry, but the things you post that he says and does...I feel so badly for you. My dh struggled at this but man...things like blaring music and not turning on AC for an infant?! I don't know how close your fam is but I would have packed up and moved in with my parents and let him figure out what he wants.</p> <p>On the blowout note, I had one of those in target. Ugh!! Those changing tables are awful, an I had two old ladies peering over my shoulder commenting the entire time! They even commented on her privates. Um - inappropriate! go away! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906446 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 10:14:15 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 906446@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: his behavior sounds despicable. Gas is expensive? So are medical bills from heat stroke! At least you've got your mom around for support. Since its obvious to others that he being so inconsiderate, is there anyone he listens to who can give him a come to Jesus talk? You have serious patience; if my husband acted like that, he'd be driving back home alone!</p> <p>I hope you enjoy your vacation and get some much needed rest! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906416 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 09:38:05 +0000 lomom 906416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@fancyfunction: omg. That sounds crazy!</p> <p>@Mrs. Champagne: he wouldn't have done it. </p> <p>@MamaMoose: I have no idea :( I feel very much one and done most days. Sometimes I entertain the idea but mostly I'm feeling like one is perfect for us. </p> <p>@blackbird: idk. I wish I knew. My mom is pretty livid with him but won't get involved, thank goodness. She's just trying to make up for his shittiness. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-906405 Thu, 04 Jul 2013 09:28:53 +0000 lomom 906405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mewtill: my mom is with us (and his cousin) and she's appalled by his inaction. She's been trying to help but it's just frustrating that he's being so inconsiderate. We'd stopped again about 4 hours later and LO woke up and was having a meltdown and I was trying to soothe him and get him to eat (he wouldn't take the bottle on the second leg of the trip, he'd take a few drinks and then choke and spit it all back up). Instead of offering to help (I was feeding lo a bottle of pumped milk) he told me to hurry up. He said if I didn't go to the bathroom he was getting back on the road. So I grabbed the diaper bag and went in and changed lo and used the bathroom because I couldn't hold it another 3+ hours. While lo was having his meltdown, I asked him to turn the car on because all the doors were shut and it was really hot in the car (probably contributing to lo's meltdown) and he said "gas is expensive" and wouldn't turn the car on. </p> <p>I'm just at my wits end. I've been pumping, feeding lo, soothing him, changing his diapers, everything. DH has been zero help. When we got to our destination, he scooped up lo and showed him off to everyone, acting like he was super dad, while I washed the bottles and pump parts. </p> <p>Then we argued over whether to give him formula or if he'd let me just nurse so I didn't have to go pump while someone gave him a bottle of formula. I thankfully won that argument and nursed him after pumping the whole car ride. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905939 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 21:50:13 +0000 blackbird 905939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry but wtf is wrong with your husband?!?! He sounds so selfish and inconsiderate and uncaring about your poor sweet baby boy :(</p> <p> :heart: mama </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905937 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 21:48:42 +0000 MamaMoose 905937@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Dude that's not cool. I would 100% refuse to get back in the car with him until he guaranteed me that he would stop ANY time I said LO needed him to. Why is he in a rush to have more kids if he doesn't want to be involved in caring for the one he has?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905927 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 21:40:33 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 905927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh man I'm sorry. That sounds horrible. What would have happened if you handed your lo to DH and told him to deal with the blow out and just walked away? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905925 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 21:39:22 +0000 fancyfunction 905925@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh no - so sorry this happened! But as others said, blowouts always seem to happen when we're out of the house too. One of the worst was at a communion party at a nice restaurant. She was obliviously sitting in her carseat when I noticed it. My husband and I had to tag-team it on a ledge outside of the ladies' room as she screamed bloody murder for all restaurant patrons to hear. Good times!! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905918 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 21:35:00 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 905918@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: oh man, honey, I worry about you :( I had - and honestly still do have - my fair share of arguments/resentful feelings towards my husband as we adjusted to a new baby and my hormones regulated (they are no joke). But, it seems like your husband is just treating you and your son So Poorly. I'm glad you can come here to vent, but keep an eye on this. Communication won't magically get better as your baby grows so he's got to figure it out.</p> <p>On the car trip front: blowouts and koala changers are THE WORST. We just finished a 2-day 12 hour total road trip and it wasn't fun. I hope you reach your destination soon and maybe you can request an audiobook for the return trip? It's hard to blast those :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905621 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:56:28 +0000 lomom 905621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@stargal: I did flip out on him, I told him to turn on the f*cking car (it was 85 degrees out and we'd been out of the car for about 20 minutes so the car was very hot, my hands were full, LO was screaming bloody murder, and he'd put something in/on the carseat base so I couldn't get LO snapped in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905608 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:53:21 +0000 stargal 905608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: urgh diaper blowout are the worst and always happen at the worst time. Good job momma for keeping you cool and getting your lo all cleaned up.<br /> Seriously though your hubby make me so mad that he's treating you like this though! Like blasting the radio?!?! Seriously yo must have patience of a saint. I would of flipped my sh*t on him lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905582 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:49:51 +0000 googly-eyes 905582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh I'm sorry about your dh! Hopefully one day you'll be able to look back and laugh about the poop though. </p> <p>The last trip with my daughter, she was six months, and she took a HUGE crap (not blowout though) as the plane was landing, which takes a good thirty minutes or so.. :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905564 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:45:42 +0000 travelgirl1 905564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally know how you feel. We went to England for a three day trip last month and A didn't poop at all while we were there until we were on the plane, taxying to take off and we couldn't get to the bathroom until we were in the air. It was ALL OVER, her back, neck, seeping through her clothes, yeah. All the other passengers were seriously grossed out, lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905556 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:43:16 +0000 lomom 905556@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Dandelion: it wasn't red, he's never had any redness and we usually just change him before each feeding, unless we know for sure he's pooped. LO never cries about wet/dirty diapers. Idk what he's thinking about the radio. He starting blasting it after we got back in the car after the blowout. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905555 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:43:15 +0000 Smurfette 905555@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I am sorry but your DH needs a reality check. I honestly don't know how you put up with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905547 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:39:51 +0000 dagret 905547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I would have snapped on him a long time ago. Hang in there - how much longer do you have on your trip? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905541 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:38:27 +0000 Dandelion 905541@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is your LO's bottom red? That's a good indication of how long he had to sit in his mess.</p> <p>Either way, that sucks. I would be really upset about him waking the baby with blasting the radio. What is he thinking? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905531 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:35:10 +0000 oliviaoblivia 905531@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry. I'd probably not get back in the car with him. That behaviour is totally unacceptable. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/of-course-he-has-a-blowout#post-905517 Wed, 03 Jul 2013 19:28:25 +0000 lomom 905517@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: unfortunately not. It's a rental so he's supposed to be the only one driving. He keeps blasting the radio and waking LO. It's really frustrating. </p>