https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 08 Apr 2026 07:07:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months/page/2#post-1840263 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 11:31:29 +0000 jetsa 1840263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So many of us have said that we continued because we were stubborn. I think the current thought is oh it's natural and therefore easy when it's NOT and I think that causes women to quit. It's so hard, one of the hardest things I've ever done in fact but it's worth it but starting out and being told it should be easy and pain free just makes those who are in the trenches or those who don't make it feel worse. Why can't we say this is hard, don't expect it to be easy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months/page/2#post-1840256 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 11:26:26 +0000 artsyfartsy 1840256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>T is 6 months and he has been EBF, meaning no formula. We had to start solids at 5 months to hold him over at daycare because he was still hungry after his bottles I supplied him with. I couldn't pump any more. </p> <p>where I live, people go straight to formula because they know no one who nurses or have no support or info on it. A lot of the information I had heard until I got pregnant I found out later was so wrong. Having a BF baby in a family that has only ever FF, they judged me and looked at me like I was starving my baby at times. When he was cluster feeding they kept trying to get me to stop because "I didn't have enough and I needed to feed him more". So many people have NO idea how breastfeeding works. If I wasn't so damn stubborn I probably would have quit. For other women who aren't passionate or knowledgable they have no reason to continue. </p> <p>I just want there to be a better understanding about how BFing works. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months/page/2#post-1840216 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:49:57 +0000 fairy 1840216@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If EBF means no formula ever, then I wouldn't have been considered ebf at 6 months, even though my daughter only had formula a handful of times in the hospital or when she was super hungry but drained both breasts during a growth spurt. She's still nursing at 14 months and hasn't had formula since maybe 4 months old, so I would not make any conclusions based on that statistic. Also wondering if ebf means they haven't started solids yet? That's what I considered ebf, and at 6 months most babies have started solids, so that may be skewing the numbers too. Anecdotally, most women I know stopped breastfeeding either because it became inconvenient or unenjoyable, or their supply took a hit and they couldn't recover it while supplementing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840201 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:30:15 +0000 avivoca 1840201@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: @jetsa: H hates the cover/blanket now. Fortunately, every time I've had to nurse her in public there has been a very secluded spot or they've had a nursing room. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840194 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:22:00 +0000 jetsa 1840194@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: lol exactly! At 9 months or so he decided he hated the cover so he'd pull it off. We've now figured out the pull up the tshirt and use it as a cover whe pulling down the nursing tank but it was quite stressful for awhile. A continuous fight over the cover being on his head :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840191 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:19:11 +0000 lawbee11 1840191@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jetsa: LOL! Yeah, I think most of the time people think she's sleeping...until she starts thrashing around and reaching through the top opening to try and rip my hair out or pull my glasses off :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840190 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:18:56 +0000 JerricaBenton 1840190@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Applesandbananas: I think about this too. If your child is in daycare, you essentially have to put them on a schedule, and yourself on a pumping schedule. If we're meant to breastfeed on demand to keep a proper supply for baby then we're already messing with it, also the stress of pumping and working etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840188 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:16:44 +0000 jetsa 1840188@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: I nurse with a cover as well and I feel like my statement came off that people are mean they are not they're just not used to it. I surprised lots of people to have a baby under the blanket lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840183 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 10:13:04 +0000 lawbee11 1840183@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jetsa: I've actually never gotten a bad look or comment when I've breastfed in public (and I've done so at the zoo, mall, a major league baseball game, etc) BUT I also always use a cover and do it discretely (moreso for my own comfort levels). I have a feeling if I nursed without a cover things would be different. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840163 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 09:49:12 +0000 Applesandbananas 1840163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do wonder what the stats are about supply issues. I wonder if lack of information/conflicting information is partly to blame for supply issues (I know for many it is biological).</p> <p>I got so much conflicting information in the early days about how supply is established, scheduling feeds, timing feeds, switching breasts, etc. in addition to the pressure from well-meaning friends and family to "just give him a bottle" so I could rest. </p> <p>I also felt like daycare was over feeding LO, which resulted in needing to supplement, even though I could meet his needs when we were together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840152 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 09:34:59 +0000 78h2o 1840152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was fortunately able to meet my goal of EBF until 6 months, but just by the skin of my teeth. Supply was a big issue, especially after I went back to work at 3 months. I had to pump 4-7 times in addition to nursing at least 4. I had no milk in reserve, so I was always just making ends meet, so to speak. Once or twice I had to leave work early because I didn't have enough milk to give daycare to get through the whole day. It would have been a heck of a lot easier to give formula, but I was really stubborn about it. I knew myself and knew that once I started with it, I would pump less, and it would be a slippery slope. That is exactly what happened around 6.5 months when I started using formula to make up the difference between what she needed at daycare and what I pumped during the day. We were able to limp along doing about 60/40 bm/formula until 11.5 months. I am not someone who tends to feel guilty about things, and it honestly did not bother me too much. I sort of regret that I started using formula, but only because my supply suffered and it was expensive. It did take some of the pressure off of me though, so I probably would do things the same if I had to do it again. </p> <p>I do think a lot of women struggle with supply. I also think going back to work makes it more challenging (not that it's easy if you are home). Public health campaigns aimed at increasing breastfeeding rates should also address supply issues. It would be nice if domperidome or other options to help with supply were more readily available. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1840089 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 08:47:40 +0000 jetsa 1840089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're still breastfeeding at a year and I love it now but I'm cutting my pumping sessions at work so I can wean at least during those hours. Breastfeeding is SO HARD, I was in pain until about 4 months and I saw everyone no one could tell me why, turns out he just needed to grow a little. I went back to work at 6 weeks and he had to have formula, he was sucking me dry every 90 mins how could I come up with a stash and I sent a can of formula to daycare to supplement with. I felt bad and shameful for the longest time but you know what it is ok he's happy and healthy! My goal was a year and I think I've made it even if he's gotten some formula. I should have quit in the early days, my DH and I were arguing over it and I'm too stubborn to quit. I'm the only person I know IRL that has breastfed this long, our society just does not expect it anymore. 16% seems so low to me though.</p> <p>@Applesandbananas: I believe EBF does mean no formula ever. My son has gotten at least 95% breastmilk and yet I don't meet the definition. Meh, screw it I've made peace with it now but it bothered me for a very long time, I feel you and the pressure its so hard.</p> <p>@lawbee11: Our society is not conducive to breastfeeding unless you are willing to not leave the house. I'm not. My kid is an extension of me and we will go do XYZ. At a year one of his absolute favorite things is live music he would have never experienced it if we'd stayed home so I could breastfeed. Also, ridiculous.</p> <p>@JerricaBenton: Yes exactly. One of my friends quit at 6 months so her husband could feed and she didn't have to pump (she stayed home so no need to pump otherwise). Breastfeeding isn't convenient and those that continue to do it are giving up part of their time and energy to do so.</p> <p>@avivoca: We've introduced WCM he likes it. I had a dr say a few weeks give or take a year isn't going to make a difference. I make plenty as long as I don't ever leave him ;) He's also a monster when it comes to solids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839889 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 06:59:48 +0000 My Only Sunshine 1839889@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I completely agree that there should be less shame and blame attached to stopping breastfeeding. In my situation, I probably COULD have made it to a year. But I would have been so so stressed and miserable. I could cry just thinking back to my last week of trying to make EBF happen. </p> <p>I went back to work at 3 months. I loved nursing but hated pumping. I'm not a super producer. On days at home with her it was fine, but with pumping I was making just barely enough for her every day with a teeny tiny freezer stash, </p> <p>When my supply started tanking around 6 months I got so stressed out. I was eating a ton of oatmeal, taking fenugreek, eating tons of protein, and practically drowning myself in water to stay hydrated, and it still wasn't cutting it. For two or three days I was panicking and crying all the time about it. Looking back, I'm sure it was a combination of feeling anxious about not making enough milk plus my hormones being sort of wonky with my milk supply dwindling. I started supplementing with formula and it was the best decision I could have made. I felt like I could be a mom again instead of spending every minute stressing about my milk production.</p> <p>I wish there was more talk about supplementing as a great option instead of talking about "breastfeeding moms" and "formula moms." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839851 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 06:13:00 +0000 looch 1839851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs.shinerbock: I think you've made an excellent point. When we think about working moms on this forum, we tend to think of moms with office jobs, or nurses, teachers, etc. We're not thinking about the moms that waitress, clean hotels, etc.</p> <p>I did also want to comment about the mental health aspect of the decisions surrounding feeding your baby. It's really difficult to be a formula feeding mom when even the formula container reads "breast is best." We know, in many cases, have agonized over the choice or lack thereof, and we do not need the constant reminders. We don't have similar language on half gallon containers of cows milk, now, do we? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839849 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 06:07:45 +0000 Applesandbananas 1839849@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs.shinerbock: agree. Even though I have a "white collar" job, I went to different locations all the time and had to explain that I needed a place to pump a zillion times. I've pumped in crazy places! I think returning to work is a huge reason women stop EBFing/BFing. Also, putting my LO in daycare meant I no longer had control over when he was fed and for the first several weeks, daycare hounded me about sending more milk and constantly told me his bottles weren't big enough. Turns out they were letting him suck down 4oz in 3 minutes so he had no idea he was full yet! It was a battle for sure and I did send some RTF formula bottles to appease them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839838 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 05:52:52 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 1839838@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not sure you can discount the argument that it is hard for working moms based on this forum. For the most part, the people on this forum have some form of education past high school and are not working low income jobs. Imagine working at a grocery store or fast food restaurant or as a housekeeper where you had to clock out for each pumping session and work longer hours to make up the pay, you have nowhere to pump but a storage closet, your boss/coworkers give you the side eye (if not act openly hostile) to you for pumping, and you have to schlep all of the pumping stuff and a cooler with you on public transportation. That is a reality for a large percentage of the population in the US.m </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839792 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 02:11:01 +0000 birdofafeather 1839792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: i agree. i don't think that everyone should have to BF or feel pressure to BF, but i wish that more women would get knowledge about their options (it's not all or none if you don't want it to be!), support if they choose to BF and support if it doesn't work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839789 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 01:16:30 +0000 Sapphiresun 1839789@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Applesandbananas: I also wonder if this is a matter of really strict definitions or the way a survey is written.</p> <p>I never fed my baby formula prior to 6 months, but she did start solids mostly to play with once a day at 5.5 months. So if I was posed a question that was like '"How long did you exclusively breastfeed?" a)not at all, b) 6 weeks, c) 3 months, d) six months, e) a year' I would have selected 3 months, because I technically introduced food prior to 6 months which to me negates the "exclusive" part. Same as EBF for a year. </p> <p>I'm still nursing at 13 months, but after about 8 months I bought singles of formula and would leave those along with pumped milk and solids if she was left with a baby sitter (I had the Canadian 1 year maternity leave, so this wasn't a regular thing) and baby sitters always at least offered the formula, because in my experience baby sitters always think fussy = feed me. So again, I wouldn't say I'd "never" done formula or exclusively breastfed, even though she nursed probably 98% of the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839787 Thu, 28 Aug 2014 00:45:52 +0000 hellocupcake 1839787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Maysprout: I was thinking this too.</p> <p>If I weren't active on parenting boards and stuff I wouldn't have considered what we did EBFing. We did baby lead weaning and LO nursed up until 18 months (stopped only because of complications with current pregnancy) but because she started eating bits and pieces of our food at 7/8 months I would have considered us no longer EBFing. I also think EBFing is still a very new "trend". The focus for our parents wasn't to EBF and even though we are moving in that direction, it's still hard to battle the opinions/comments. Everyone always asked when we would stop breastfeeding. MIL made comments about how my milk wasn't even nutritional or necessary after about 3 months. My sister's MIL told her the same thing. If our close friends and family go so far as to discourage breastfeeding, I can't imagine it would be easy for everyone to really stick to it. </p> <p>Side note: I overheard DH's cousins (aged 24 and 28) talking about how it's unnatural to breastfeed past 6 months. How they will try for 3 months but not push to go beyond that. It's definitely something our society has to get used to again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839757 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 23:21:05 +0000 rolypoly 1839757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're EBFing @ 7 Months, with me going back to work @ 8 weeks. Breastfeeding has been a hard, but wonderful, experience. I had the support of my mom for two weeks, a wonderful lactation group weekly for an additional six weeks, a super supportive husband who washes all my pump parts nightly, a private area at work to pump in and a flexible management job - AND it is still SUPER hard. I can't imagine if I didn't have the support or privilege or if I had serious supply issues. I think being able to EBF is equal parts luck, hard work, and privilege. The Catch 22 between supportive public health campaigns/education and maternal depression and judgment regarding inability to BF is such a hard issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839729 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 22:48:09 +0000 Vegmama 1839729@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you for sharing this!!! </p> <p>I have chronic low supply, due to insufficient gland tissue. I'm still breastfeeding at 8 months, but my daughter is also supplemented (quite a bit). </p> <p>Out of my 5 girlfriends that had babies within a month of each other, 4 of us have had major supply issues. </p> <p>I agree with everything you said. I decided before my baby was born that BFing was important to me, and I wanted to EBF for at least a year (preferably BY until 18 months to 2 years), but in the end, it didn't work out like that at all. I had NOOOO idea these problems existed. I figured women either wanted to or didn't want to BF, and that was that. </p> <p>Thankfully, I haven't had to deal with PPD, even with my BF issues ... If anything, it's taught me a ton of empathy for other mothers, and I am an inspired advocate for helping moms through that time. </p> <p>Thank you again for sharing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839726 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 22:44:41 +0000 LovelyPlum 1839726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are.EBF at 4.5 months, but my DH and I said from the beginning that if it adversely affected my mental health, we would reevaluate. I have PPA, but honestly, I don't feel like BFing has been one of my huge triggers. Pumping at times, yes. I really did not enjoy it at first, because the shield is a PITA and latching HURT. Once we ditched the shield, things got easier, and at 4 months, I am finally starting to really like it. Even with her MSPI, some days it is honestly the only thing that I feel good at. I know this would nit put me in a great place if my supply suddenly tanked, but we will cross that bridge if we get there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839566 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 20:25:08 +0000 Corduroy 1839566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Skadi: You mention the California rates. According to some very superficial Wikipedia data collection, California has 32% Hispanic population and according to the CDC Mexican Americans have the highest breast feeding rates in America. I would think that would have some influence.</p> <p>It seems like more of the breastfeeding conversation and research should be focused on why women that want to BF are having trouble doing so. I EBF until 13 months (not counting solids at 6 months) but I also "quit" on one breast at about 2 months so I feel like I understand the "defeat" side of it too. I get that the pain, tears, hard work, time, diet, sleep deprivation that I put in was not enough to overcome my anatomy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839533 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:55:26 +0000 Maysprout 1839533@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As far as bf not affecting mental health except for societal pressure, that's not true for everyone. Lots of mood hormones are affected by bf and when I went to wean suddenly at a year and a half there was no societal pressure to continue and it was a hard crash I took, must have been an oxytocin addict. But I wish I'd been warned bc it was really hard, weaning can be hard not just bc of society but also the hormones involved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839528 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:53:54 +0000 Mae 1839528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree this is setting us up to feel like failures. I've had a lot of unhappiness about having to give up BF and am now considering giving up pumping, which I"m feeling horrible about. But the bottom line is-- I worked my ass off to breastfeed and it didn't work. And I don't know why. My induction? My c-section? My post-c-section complicate? LO's tongue tie? Just really bad luck? Some combination of the above? All I know is that I did everything I could do and it didn't work and it makes me feel like shit that so many people say everyone SHOULD be able to do it. /rant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839516 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:44:53 +0000 Maysprout 1839516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wonder a bit about the accuracy of the questionnaire. The recommendation is to start solids at 6 months but a lot start giving some or small tastes sooner. I participated in a breastfeeding study and wasn't sure if I should put down that I was exclusively bf since my LO got tastes of solids. When I asked they said as long as it wasn't regular full meals that I should choose exclusively bf, I wouldn't have chosen that if I hadn't asked. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839508 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:40:57 +0000 BeachMama 1839508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really truly disliked breastfeeding for the first 4-5 months at least, and I feel that it really affected my ability to bond with DD. She was colicky, I was dealing with some PPD, so the frustrations with BFing really didn't help. I just hated being tethered to her all the tim, being the only one able to do night feedings, etc. I made it to 7 months, when after returning to work my supply decreased and I hated pumping at work. We were having to supplement at that point so we decided to just switch to formula at that point.</p> <p>With #2 on the way, I've told myself if I have the same struggles and dislike of BFing I'm not going to force myself to do it. Sure breastmilk may be best, but a happy sane mama is also better for baby. Just my 2 cents... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839507 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:40:56 +0000 MrsTiz 1839507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: forealz.. Super easy!</p> <p>@oliviaoblivia: your last two sentences nailed it. </p> <p>I stopped nursing/pumping at just over 4 weeks. Why? I was on maternity leave, I have boobs and I had a pretty solid supply going on..so apparently I should have kept going or still be nursing.</p> <p>I stopped because<br /> -LO would never latch, the hospital lactation consultant said "wow, I'm defeated..I've never had this happen before." So encouraging<br /> -that meant EP. EP blows..hard. Pumping 30 min every two hours, then I still had to bottle feed LO that pumped milk? Bump that. My entire day was spent pumping or feeding. Literally.<br /> -I had 0 support system, don't know anyone IRL who nurses<br /> -It was horrible for my mental health, it drained me, it frustrated me, it made me mad at myself and LO for not latching </p> <p>So at 4 weeks, I stopped. I've never looked back, haven't felt bad about it once. I enjoy passing LO off to be fed by someone else, I love not wearing nursing pads and bras, LO doesn't wake up to eat 5x a night like so many nursing babies do, I don't have sore nips, I don't have to change my diet or worry about that extra glass of wine, I am able to send LO off to sleepovers with his grandparents without pumping for an eternity, most importantly..I am 10x happier than I was when I was pumping. The first month after I stopped was life changing</p> <p>There is no significant environmental factor that stopped us. I stopped it because I wanted to. Period. I feed my baby, he's incredibly healthy and smart and honestly I don't see the point in this other than to try and disguise this as an attempt to figure out why people chose not to nurse so they can feel bad about it because "breast is best!" </p> <p>Feeding your baby is best. However you decide to do it..do it the best you can. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839481 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 19:20:59 +0000 blackbird 1839481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly....formula is easy. So easy. You can have help. You can sleep. You can trade with your husband. You can work. I agree that lives are busier now than they ever used to be. And so many jobs (teachers, nurses...) aren't as breastfeeding friendly </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/only-16-exclusively-bf-at-6-months#post-1839461 Wed, 27 Aug 2014 18:53:56 +0000 Adira 1839461@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We EBF'd for 6 months and continued to breastfeed until Xander was 14.5 months. I returned to work at 12 weeks. I was INCREDIBLY stubborn and refused to give up breastfeeding, despite how hard it was and how time consuming it was. By the end, I was spending FOUR HOURS of my day pumping just to be able to produce enough for Xander's daily intake. And that doesn't even include setting up/breaking down the pump, preparing bottles, or washing bottles and parts.</p> <p>I'm not at all surprised more people don't EBF considering what I had to do to make it to a year. And I had it easy - I, in general, didn't have supply issues, didn't have latch issues, didn't deal with thrush or matisis, etc. </p>