https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 02 May 2026 10:54:12 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748887 Sun, 18 Jun 2017 12:08:12 +0000 danda 2748887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: the night the police came she asked what was going on and I told her he wanted to make sure she was safe and that he thought someone was hurting her. She looked confused and said no one hurt her. That was the end of me talking to her about it. We specifically weren't supposed to talk to her about it to not "taint" the investigation. And certainly I didn't want to say something that would give her words that she'd repeat during the interview. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748885 Sun, 18 Jun 2017 12:03:17 +0000 danda 2748885@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: after hearing the words, I understood why they would report it if they thought it was about my husband. I explained what I figured out to the teacher and the director, and they said how they felt so bad about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748819 Sun, 18 Jun 2017 05:14:06 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2748819@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, that was a major accusation. How did you restrain yourself from asking your daughter to explain more? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748801 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 22:12:57 +0000 travellingbee 2748801@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@danda: wow, did you ever talk to the daycare provider about it? Did you stay there? That would make me so uncomfortable having my child's teacher thinking we sexually abused our child!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748789 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 20:48:11 +0000 mrs.kiwi 2748789@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry. What a stressful and traumatic time. Thank you so much for sharing this experience with us.. I learned a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748787 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 19:49:15 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2748787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry this happened to your family. Your poor DH. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748786 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 19:39:47 +0000 avivoca 2748786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so sorry this happened to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748761 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 18:03:10 +0000 PawPrints 2748761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry this happened to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748744 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 16:41:10 +0000 MamaG 2748744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't even imagine. I guess this is part of why my DH prefers not to bathe our older daughter at almost 6. She still needs help particularly with her hair and he will do it but would rather I handle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748714 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 14:40:22 +0000 tequiero21 2748714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( so sorry you went through this. What a nightmare. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748712 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 14:28:45 +0000 GoGoSnoGirl 2748712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My gosh, so many occurrences of over cautious investigations. I suppose this may catch occasions that are problems, but wow. :shocked: I'm sorry your family (&amp; particularly your falsely accused dh) had to deal with this. :crying: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/our-cps-experience#post-2748710 Sat, 17 Jun 2017 14:20:05 +0000 danda 2748710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was inspired by another thread to share our experience with CPS.</p> <p>One night I was getting the kids ready for bed and a police officer came to our house and questioned my husband. He informed us that our 4 year old had made a disclosure of sexual abuse to a daycare teacher. This was shocking to both my husband and me and we couldn't imagine what was going on. He asked my husband a bunch of questions about their relationship and about showering. He had my husband additionally fill out some paperwork. We were made to agree to a "safe plan" that my children could not be alone with my husband, including transportation/daycare drop-off/pick-up. We would be contacted by CPS personnel with next steps, to include checking her for any obvious physical signs of abuse the next day, a home visit and an interview at a child advocacy center. The officer would not tell us specifically what our daughter had said.</p> <p>The police officer departed and I received a phone call later in the evening from a CPS intake officer which echoed what the police had said. I asked how quickly we could get past all of this, emphasizing how I was sure this was all unfounded and that the safe plan was going to put a significant burden on me. CPS wouldn't give further information at that point, but suggested trying to get help from family and that if I couldn't comply then I should let them know (I was pretty sure that if I couldn't comply, other arrangements would involve removing my kids, so I didn't go there).</p> <p>A CPS officer visited my daughter at daycare the next day without us present. He called that afternoon and said he didn't see anything of note, and that our interview at the child advocacy center would be early the following week. We had to continue to follow the safe plan.</p> <p>When scheduled, my daughter and I went to the interview site. My husband was explicitly not permitted to be present. It was a very child-friendly atmosphere with lots of toys. We had showed up early so my daughter played for a while before they were ready. First the interviewer took my daughter just to see the room with me so she wouldn't be scared to go back there without me. Then a few minutes later they took her back without me. She was interviewed with a closed circuit television and police and CPS agents were watching. I was not able to watch. A different person spoke with me briefly about services and therapy that we may need. After 90 minutes they came out and told me the investigation was unsubstantiated. They took me back alone and talked with me about the specific disclosure my daughter had made. She had told her teacher about touching that bothered her, including when taking showers together. My daughter takes showers or baths with her younger sibling, which I mentioned. They said in general, no need to dwell on what was said moving forward. Also, CPS procedures would require a home visit, but the safe plan was done.</p> <p>Right after we left, I realized that the daycare teacher had misunderstood the entire conversation - my daughter was saying how sometimes her baby brother doesn't give gentle touches, etc. So much stress based on the teacher misunderstanding my daughter!!! </p> <p>The home visit was two days later and was short and quick. The CPS officer just needed to see that my kids had a safe place to sleep, and then everything was over. We received an official letter stating the charges were unsubstantiated in the mail. </p>