https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 15:26:17 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2886193 Fri, 31 May 2019 17:55:14 +0000 LabradorLover 2886193@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@paigeface: I’m glad to hear you’re doing good! I’ve completely stopped BF now and I’m actually totally ok. I tried Monday and she was still hungry afterwards so I said forget it, I’m done! Surprisingly I’m doing better than I thought, almost like the whole anticipation leading up to actually stopping was worst than stopping! I’m happy to hear it’s going well for you and your baby! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2886185 Fri, 31 May 2019 16:11:41 +0000 JJ2626 2886185@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That Emily Oster podcast was great and I so agree with her perspective. Switching to all formula at 12 weeks was the very best thing for me and my daughter. The stress around pumping and nursing was seriously interfering with bonding and I knew I could not add work on top of it. A fog lifted when I went to formula and I finally started to enjoy being a mom. Fed is best! If I have another I won’t nurse at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2886176 Fri, 31 May 2019 14:00:43 +0000 LCTBQE 2886176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@paigeface: so happy to hear this :) :) might be water under the bridge at this point but the emily oster podcast that @foodiebee: linked to *really* surprised me as an argument against the breast-is-best camp. IMO it should be required listening to anyone stressing out about feeding. fed is best and I'm so glad you're enjoying your baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2886174 Fri, 31 May 2019 13:35:28 +0000 paigeface 2886174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lemonjack: It’s true unfortunately I am set to go back on Monday to work. I have made the decision to go all formula. I was having a really hard time dealing with my son, breastfeeding around the clock and staying sane. DD took formula very well and I am in the process of drying up my breast milk. I wanted to thank you all for the responses as it truly put me at ease about the second time guilt. I actually feel like a weight has been lifted and i’m starting to enjoy my girl more! Thank you so much for your response @labradorlover: and i’m just now feeling good about my decision as well! the support from my mom and friends has been tremendous. I feel in such a better mental state especially going from one toddler to two kiddos by letting BF go. I know DD will thrive no matter what and that even the two weeks I exclusively breast fed was amazing! She surpassed her birth weight by her second checkup and that made me feel really good!!! :heart: I know this is the best decision for me and for my mental state to enjoy my family of 4! Love to you all for your responses! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885586 Sat, 25 May 2019 09:27:35 +0000 LemonJack 2885586@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know it’s hard not to have guilt, but whatever you do is okay and it will work out just fine. If it causes too much stress to pump, it’s okay not to do that.</p> <p>And is it accurate that you’re going back June 1st? If so, I’m so sorry. That’s really hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885552 Fri, 24 May 2019 19:28:07 +0000 LabradorLover 2885552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>thank you @lindseykaye: for posting the link to my recent post as I was going to share too! </p> <p>@paigeface: as you can see, I was and still am going through this same ordeal. I didn’t have any issues with BF but having to go back to work and pump was just not for me. I’ve been back to work 4 weeks now and next week I won’t be pumping anymore. I started weaning my daughter last week by not nursing her at night anymore but still nursing before work and pumping once a day, so she is getting mostly formula during the day. The truth is that I could probably just stop nursing tomorrow altogether and be fine, however, I’m just not ready to totally give up yet. I feel you on the guilty-ness, it has really been a struggle for me but between the support on here and from friends and family, I’m feeling much better about my decision.</p> <p>You shouldn’t feel guilty although I totally understand why you do. I’m learning that my baby is thriving whether she gets breast milk or formula and she loves me just the same either way. I’m sure you’re a terrific mommy and your baby will do the same. I’m here if you ever want to chat! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885422 Thu, 23 May 2019 12:40:22 +0000 foodiebee 2885422@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Check out this interview with Emily Oster of "Data-Driven Guide to Parenting" and "Expecting Better." She speaks to breastfeeding in a way that might help you feel like you can relinquish your guilt? </p> <p><a href="http://freakonomics.com/podcast/parenting/" rel="nofollow">http://freakonomics.com/podcast/parenting/</a></p> <p>The transcript gives excerpts from the interview, but basically what I took away from listening is that fed truly is best and that society doesn't put enough value on mom's sanity and mental health, and that those are super-compelling reasons for making this decision. Making the best choice for your health is being a good mama! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885419 Thu, 23 May 2019 12:17:26 +0000 nwm 2885419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I share many of your same feelings about breastfeeding so solidarity. I also promised myself I would have no guilt the second time around and then still felt a ton of it. But I can say that once I had made a decision and moved on (supplementing, ultimately weaning), after a short time I felt such relief and like I didn't know why I felt so bad in the first place! It is so so hard in the early weeks so solidarity to you and no matter what you decide, know that you are still a wonderful mom and don't need to feel any guilt for whatever choice is right for you. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885412 Thu, 23 May 2019 11:16:21 +0000 bhbee 2885412@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It’s ok to feel conflicted! I have no physical issues with bf but I found it really difficult this time around because of schedule stress. That is so so normal, everything you are saying makes sense! Don’t feel guilty ... a mama in a good mental place is the most important thing :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885411 Thu, 23 May 2019 11:12:58 +0000 lindseykaye 2885411@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A similar topic was posted not too long ago and there were tons of helpful replies - maybe reading through them can help you with your guilt and reassure you. I know they did for me!!</p> <p>Long story short is that however you feed your baby it will work out. Breastfeeding, formula only, pumping, whatever combination of the above. You can try something and then change it if it's not working. You know yourself, and your baby, best &lt;3 </p> <p><a href="https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stopping-nursingpumping-amp-feeling-guilty#post-2881501" rel="nofollow">https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stopping-nursingpumping-amp-feeling-guilty#post-2881501</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885410 Thu, 23 May 2019 11:11:48 +0000 snarkybiochemist 2885410@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To give yourself the best chance of succeeding with combo feeding (which is a really great option) start with the slowest flow nipple and try pace feeding the bottle feeds (I don't have links but google or youtube should). We did some combo of nursing/pumping/formula until E was 7 months and then all formula until 12 months. Anyway your baby gets feed is awesome and don't feel guilty for it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885408 Thu, 23 May 2019 11:01:00 +0000 psw27 2885408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do what works for you. A happy mom makes for a happier baby. If you want to try the morning and evening nursing sessions and don't pump, great! If that doesn't work out, formula is great too! If you do all formula, that's great! Try to not feel guilty about any choice. If your child is fed, you are doing a great job. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885405 Thu, 23 May 2019 10:53:16 +0000 KT326 2885405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do not feel guilty!! Happy mom, happy baby, no matter how the baby is getting fed, is all that matters! I had to supplement with both my boys when I went back to work because I just couldn't pump enough. So they got formula at daycare and we nursed at home and on the weekends. My body adjusted and it was great! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/overcoming-mom-guilt-and-returning-to-work-thinking-about-supplementing#post-2885404 Thu, 23 May 2019 10:49:31 +0000 paigeface 2885404@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi guys,</p> <p>Sorry in advanced for the super lengthy post. I just had DD a week and half ago via c-section and everything went great! I was able to breastfeed right away and my milk came in right on day three when we were able to leave the hospital. Transitioning at home with my 3 year old DS was SO much harder then we were anticipating. He has been super difficult but each day seems to get a tiny bit better. We had to have my mom come stay with us these last two weeks to help with him so that I could continue to breastfeed etc. Breastfeeding is going well so far however I am a bit embarrassed to say I don’t love it. I think a lot of that stems from the fact that I have to return to work at our family business on June 1st. Some anxiety also comes from past thoughts of when I tried breastfeeding with my son but we didn’t make it because of nursing sessions lasting hours and PPD baby blues on my part. I pumped for a few weeks with him but gave that up to and went to formula because it was just way too much since I don’t get to stay home. I’d really like to do combo feeding if my body allows it meaning just feeding her in the early morning before work and at night and doing formula during the day. I am feeling a bit of mom guilt again even though I promised myself I wouldn’t this time around after beating myself up so badly with my DS when we didn’t succeed with it. I feel like this would fit best with our lives because of work and because I truly feel totally tied down not being able to help with my son at all. I feel like walking pacifier which just won’t work at my job. Pumping exclusively is also not an option! I truly hate pumping and overproduction was just such an issue last time I don’t want to deal with it and deal with going back to work full time. Any advice would be truly helpful and wanted! The mom guilt is slowly starting to creep back in and making me feel pretty terrible. :bummed: </p>