https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 18 Jul 2026 17:51:33 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313943 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 14:38:28 +0000 BoogieBea 1313943@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: The one time we threw him an actual birthday party was when he turned 3. I don't think he really enjoyed it and there was less than 10 kids invited.<br /> I hope it gets better for him. It seems like it's going to be a work in progress with my son for a while. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313939 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 14:36:42 +0000 T-Mom 1313939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DD is 5.. I don't know if she is painfully shy, but she is definitely shy and reserved. She has been in day care since 5 months so she knows the drill.. but she still has her moments. Such as the time when I came for a Thanksgiving party and she screamed bloody murder when I had to go back to work (that was age 4, this year was perfect). She still has episodes from time to time... </p> <p>Is there something he can keep in his pocket as a comfort item? Like a little rock that is special or something that he can remember you by? Something not big enough for others to see and embarrass him by. </p> <p>I'm nervous about my DD going to public school first grade next year.. she is in a very small private school and class right now and I'm definitely nervous about how she will handle the transition, so I feel you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313922 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 14:32:22 +0000 Mamaof2 1313922@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoyfulKiwi: Yes after drop off he is 100% fine. He plays with others and never cries so I know that is good - I just wish I could make drop off easier for him!</p> <p>I have asked him why he gets upset and he says he wants to stay with me. I have tried engaging him in activities, helping a teacher, playing with his sister, eating breakfast - once I start to leave he runs after me =(</p> <p>@BoogieBea: My DS wanted one friend over for his birthday his reason "So its nice and quiet" haha He def does better with just 1 kid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313882 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 14:23:22 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 1313882@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: I also taught Pre-K, K, and now teach 2nd. Before the break, how did he do at preschool? I don't really mean drop-off, because lots and lots of kids get upset about that. What do his teachers say about the rest of the day? If he's able to function the rest of the day, even if he's very quite and shy, I don't think there's anything *you* need to do for him.</p> <p>Have you ever talked with him about why he cries at drop off time? Is he missing you or anxious or scared? I think you should make a plan with him about how to make getting dropped off better: a special activity, a little lovey or small object he can keep in his pocket to reassure him, or a responsibility he could do at school (we had a student who we let set out the art supplies for the day when he arrived). </p> <p>As for Kindergarten, I wouldn't worry too much. Kids are pretty perceptive &amp; you don't want him to feel like he's doing something wrong when he's upset at drop offs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313837 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 14:05:22 +0000 BoogieBea 1313837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is the same. He just kind of plays by himself at birthday parties and either my husband or I has to be by his side all the time. He's been SLOWLY getting better. He's also going to be entering kindergarten this year. Luckily, he's now pretty comfortable in school even though he is probably not the most engaging in his class. A large part of it is definitely his personality. I am a shy person myself and I see much of myself in him. I also didn't socialize him as much as his younger sister when he was younger. We have more play dates with friends now just so he can get used to environments with more people around. It's much easier for him to get comfortable when there are just 1 or 2 additional kids. He also takes a couple of different classes outside of school. It's nice to see him start initiating conversation with his peers versus hiding in the background. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313800 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 13:50:53 +0000 wonderstruck 1313800@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was extremely shy and probably would have been the crying kid if not for a few things my mom did </p> <p>- I had non-family babysitters on a somewhat regular basis, so it wasn't a big deal to go with my teacher at the beginning of the school day, I was already used to that.</p> <p>- Enrolling me in activities with other kids (tee ball, dance, whatever they're interested in) and sometimes staying to watch, sometimes running errands nearby. As long as she stuck around long enough for me to be engaged in an activity I was fine, and soon not even that was necessary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313478 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 12:17:29 +0000 Mamaof2 1313478@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lilteacherbee: Thanks! Yes the teacher does distract him - I even try to get him to play with his little sister but nope, doesn't work! When I drop off his "friends" are not yet there.</p> <p>There is a K orientation in April and I dread that too - the kids are suppose to go with the teacher while the parents stay with the principle..... OMG he is going to be a mess!</p> <p>Other than the 1st day I will do drop offs at the DCP and they will bus him to school </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313361 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 11:38:13 +0000 lilteacherbee 1313361@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I used to be a painfully shy kid. I'm still on the quiet side and I HATE anything where I'm the center of attention- seriously....my bridal and baby showers were not so fun because everyone was staring at ME. </p> <p>I'm also a pre-k teacher. Do your son's teachers ever talk to you about this? Do they have ways to distract him at drop off? Also, does it also affect how he interacts with other children? In my experience, kids usually warm up to their classmates and teachers. It can take awhile (last year I had a student who tried to run away everyday until December), but even my most shy kids will find at least one friend and slowly begin to interact with others. It may help for his teachers to find one of the kids he "trusts" and separate them from the group in the morning (like have them go to one center with less children so he's not as overwhelmed).</p> <p>I would talk to his teachers and ask what they suggest for kindergarten regarding drop offs. I promise, your son will not be the only one crying! If its possible, I would bring him into the school/classroom before school starts and let him see what it will be like before the emotionally charged first day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/painfully-shy-kids#post-1313227 Thu, 02 Jan 2014 11:03:40 +0000 Mamaof2 1313227@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok I remember back a post where we did ours kids ages and I think I remember at least a few with older kids - so this is for you or if anyone else has ideas</p> <p>My DS is 5 and painfully shy - been this way since birth. Has been extremely attached to me since birth and just recently (within the past 2 months) has stopped crying when I leave him home with his dad and sister.</p> <p>School started back today (Pre-K) and he cried at drop -off - I knew he would since its been almost 2 weeks of no school.</p> <p>Anyway..... I am DREADING when he starts K this fall. The brochure for K says "must be able to separate from parent easily" haha - not my kid!</p> <p>If he is the 1st one to arrive at an event/school/party he does pretty good but if 5+ kids are there he freaks! </p> <p>ANY ideas on how to help him overcome this? It breaks my heart and drives me crazy at the same time!</p> <p>For the record I have always been on the quiet side and a homebody but I don't remember ever being this anxious! </p>