https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 22 May 2026 15:50:33 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651559 Sat, 12 Nov 2016 04:04:32 +0000 lamariniere 2651559@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Such a bittersweet moment. T is lucky to have had two wonderful mommies. I hope the transition goes well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651548 Sat, 12 Nov 2016 00:16:46 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2651548@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pregnantbee: @jhd: @nellywm: @psw27: @Mrs. Oatmeal: Thank you all. It is going to be so hard. I sincerely hope it is the right thing and that he and his mom will continue to do well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651509 Fri, 11 Nov 2016 20:44:07 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 2651509@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no input, but wanted to send you guys all the hugs - this has got to be so tough, even if it is wonderful for T to be back with his birth mom. Hoping transitions go smoothly for you all! You'll be in my prayers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651350 Fri, 11 Nov 2016 14:02:21 +0000 nwm 2651350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i've been following your story with great interest! you guys are heroes!! sending you so much love and support for getting through this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651318 Fri, 11 Nov 2016 12:13:28 +0000 psw27 2651318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sending you love and support. I can't imagine how hard this will be for you and your wife. :sad: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651200 Fri, 11 Nov 2016 08:38:25 +0000 jhd 2651200@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: such a sweet picture! My parents were foster parents for 20 years so I'm familiar with this process, although admittedly not from the mama perspective which has to be so very much harder. You and your wife have done an amazing thing and you will continue to be in my thoughts. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651120 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 23:59:23 +0000 pregnantbee 2651120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice but thinking of you. T has been so lucky to have you and your wife. I hope you do get to keep in touch. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651114 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 23:31:58 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2651114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also, here they are today: </p> [attach=5595/16/oggndr.499x600.20161110_203319.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651113 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 23:30:38 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2651113@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pachamama: @Pancakes: Thank you both. We need all the support we can get. It's going to be a rough month. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651051 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 21:00:41 +0000 Pancakes 2651051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: No advice, just sending love to you all :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2651031 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 20:19:57 +0000 pachamama 2651031@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: I've been following you, I was just thinking of T. I'm sad for you. I hope he does well with mom!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650975 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 18:20:11 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2650975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Thanks. This is really hard. I'm really hoping it's for the best for him. T hasn't gotten attached to any one blanket or stuffed animal, although he has a few small ones that live in his crib. He mostly uses his pacifiers to soothe, both in his mouth and one in each hand! I'm not envious of his mother having to break that habit one day!</p> <p>@bees_knees: Really good idea. He isn't verbal yet at all, but does understand SO MUCH. I sometimes forget how much he understands and then am surprised when he does something we are talking about. I will definitely start talking about the move and how excited his mom is to have him back, and how much we love him and will continue to visit with him. Thank you for bringing this up, I think it's a really good point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650873 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 15:30:04 +0000 bees_knees 2650873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>These are all great ideas. I would also start talking about it with him about what changes are ahead, so he knows what to expect. Even if he's not very verbal (my 15 mo wasn't), it's crazy how much they can understand. My kids also do well when I acknowledge their feelings (i.e. Being scared/sad/etc) honestly and tell them it's normal to feel like that (and that I feel like that too!) </p> <p>I apologize, I haven't been closely following your story. But my thoughts and prayers are with your family, T's mom, and most of all, T. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650869 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 15:21:07 +0000 Adira 2650869@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So much love to you during this difficult time. &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3 I can't imagine how heartbreaking this is for you guys, but at the same time, I'm happy for T and his mom.</p> <p>Both my kids got really attached to their swaddle blankets, even though we didn't swaddle them very long. Does T have anything like that he can take with him?</p> <p>But in general, T will be fine. Kids are so resilient and he'll get over the transition probably sooner than you will. So much love to you guys for providing him with such a safe and loving environment while his mom got the help she needed. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650837 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 14:44:27 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2650837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jass: @jhd: @twodoghouse: @snowjewelz: @wrkbrk: @junebugsmama: @peaches1038: @GoGoSnoGirl: @birdofafeather: Thank you all so much. I think I posted as much for support as I did for advice. This is really hard.</p> <p>@Silva: Good idea. We always read but often switch it up. I'll start making sure we do his favorite book last every night so it is consistent. I think his mom will be willing to try to make everything as easy as possible for him.</p> <p>@NorthStar: Good idea. I was thinking of making a photo book of him, O, and of course the two of us with them for him to take with him but also for us to keep. I guess I should do that asap. </p> <p>@T.H.O.U.: Good point. We are taking this into account and are trying to find a balance that will make it work for everyone. Part of our thinking behind making a gradual transition is that his mom isn't realistic about his personality or developmental stage right now-she still remembers him as a checked out baby-so she is going to be in for a shock when he gets fussy. (She has said to me that he never cries...um...no) So we want to extend visits first partially to give her a better idea of what she's in for. But we are also taking him into account and trying not to drag it out too much.</p> <p>@Miss Ariel: Wow, I'm so sorry about your house. What a traumatic few months for everyone! I really appreciate you sharing your experience. </p> <p>@Mama Bird: We are going to try to stay in touch. We've been working to build a relationship with his mom for the last month or so with that goal in mind. I think she will be willing to let us see him, so hopefully that will work out. We would like to be a resource in case she has a hard time adjusting to having a wild, opinionated, sensitive toddler all of a sudden. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650807 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 14:03:49 +0000 Mama Bird 2650807@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry. I'm glad he can return to his mom, but this must be so hard for you... will you be able to stay in touch after the transition? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650800 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 13:54:33 +0000 birdofafeather 2650800@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sending love. How bittersweet. ❤️❤️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650769 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 13:06:34 +0000 GoGoSnoGirl 2650769@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have advice, but I do want to send love to your family &amp; T's mom as you all work through the transition. I'm sure this will be hard on you, but your love &amp; care for him will hopefully help everything go smoothly. It sounds like you have great ideas how to make it as painless as possible. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650761 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 12:33:41 +0000 peaches1038 2650761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sending 💚💚 your way </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650758 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 12:30:21 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2650758@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: just sending :heart: s. Even though I know it's always been the technical goal, it's not easy, and you have done a great thing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650747 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 12:07:23 +0000 wrkbrk 2650747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: Aww, I'm so sorry, mama. You and your DW should be proud of yourselves for what you're doing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650732 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 11:43:38 +0000 Miss Ariel 2650732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think we try so hard to keep anything we can consistent through change, which likely helps but it isn't always possible. </p> <p>Back in August, we lost our house to flooding and had to evacuate in about an hour. Dd was 20 months at the time, and while there were a few rough nights, overall she's been fine. Especially knowing that since August we lived with my inlaws for 6 weeks, moved dd to a toddler bed, moved into a new house, and gave birth to Ds.</p> <p>We did manage to evacuate with dd's favorite stuffed animal and favorite book, but apart for a few random books and clothes that were up high and plastic toys that could be soaked in bleach we lost basically all of her stuff.</p> <p>Overall, what I'm trying to say is that I think T will be fine. Favorite toys or books could help the transition, but I don't think are a necessity. It's probably going to be much harder for you two, and I'm sending you lots of love on making the transition. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650672 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 10:37:13 +0000 snowjewelz 2650672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is so great for their family, but also heartbreaking for you guys :sad: Hoping for the best and sending all my love :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650649 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 09:49:52 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2650649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also maybe just start keeping a journal of things he likes, routines, schedules etc. (day in the life style posts). maybe do it electronically and then you can keep a copy for memories too. If his mom doesn't need it that's fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650646 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 09:47:51 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2650646@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly the one lesson I've learned is that kids are resilient. Sometime we adults make it a harder more drawn out process in trying to help. The transition you've described honestly sounds too long and drawn out. Rip the bandaid and let him adjust. Otherwise it may just be too rough. </p> <p>If you look at daycare transitions they limit it to one week of shadowing and then the next week they go full force into the new routine (aka sleeping on floor instead of a crib). It sucks for 2-3 days instead of 2-3 weeks. </p> <p>The part I would limit would be the the naps and overnights if possible. Maybe just the week before he leaves do Monday a long visit, Tuesday and Wednesday a long visit with naps and Thursday and Friday overnights. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650619 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 08:52:15 +0000 twodoghouse 2650619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice, but just wanted to let you know I'll be sending good thoughts your way. I can't imagine how hard this will be for all of you. I am in awe of your strength. T's been so lucky to know you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650604 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 08:16:58 +0000 NorthStar 2650604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh, this breaks my heart :crying: You have been so wonderful for him and I think that you are thinking of many good things that will help the transition. I think that trying to keep some things the same, like bedding and lovies would help. Will they allow you to provide a small photo book of you and DW that he can look at? </p> <p>I'll be keeping you in my thoughts. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650589 Thu, 10 Nov 2016 01:55:25 +0000 Silva 2650589@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are doing a wonderful thing for him. And his mom.</p> <p>If she is game, you could stRt some small traditions, like reading the same book at bedtime, that would be easily transferred to moms house. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650581 Wed, 09 Nov 2016 23:18:01 +0000 jhd 2650581@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: so much love to your family. :heart: no advice but I know this is difficult. I hope others are able to chime in with good tips. I think your plan so far sounds great and I will be keeping your family in my thoughts as you go through this transition. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preparing-for-a-big-transition#post-2650571 Wed, 09 Nov 2016 22:30:37 +0000 Jass 2650571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no experience and advice but i have followed ur journey from the beginning and just want to say u r doing an amazing job. ..lots of hugs </p>