https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 11:45:40 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830132 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 20:37:16 +0000 caitcat 2830132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: Thank you! I’ll look into that! We’ve tried so hard to get her constipation under control and I’m worried potty training, especially with a deadline in mind, will throw a wrench in it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830130 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 20:34:16 +0000 caitcat 2830130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTal: When I talked to ours, their biggest thing was “no pull-ups” for her class. That’s interesting that yours would let him join the class a bit later - I get your hesitation with that. The start of the year routine seems useful to be part of to me. I’m hoping for “close enough” for both of us! I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you over the Fourth of July. Having an extra set of hands is so helpful, but that much more so with twins too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830120 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 19:55:33 +0000 Corduroy 2830120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@caitcat: I just trained my chronically constipated son. I recommend The Ins and Outs of Poop. <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Ins-Outs-Poop-Childhood-Constipation/dp/0985496916" rel="nofollow">https://www.amazon.com/Ins-Outs-Poop-Childhood-Constipation/dp/0985496916</a> There’s an old board post about it. Not everything in the book fit my son but the suggested methods and the mindset helped him a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830108 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 19:02:54 +0000 Pollywog 2830108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you tried going naked instead of undies? I had my LO naked on the deck with a little potty for a few days to get it. He then went commando for a month. It really helped him. As soon as undies went on he had accidents. </p> <p>And scheduled potty breaks at school were vital for our success. Peer pressure also helped a ton. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830102 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 18:41:48 +0000 MrsTal 2830102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you discussed with the preschool at all? </p> <p>We are in the exact same scenario right now. My LO will be 3.5 in August and starts school that month but only if he’s potty trained. Apparently if he isn’t by then we can possibly push off starting him for a bit though I’m not sure that’s the best idea. My husband took off around the 4th of July and we are going to really try to push the training then. He can go on the potty and realizes the feeling but just doesn’t want to train because he’s more interested in all the other things. Tbh I haven’t tried to hard with training because having our twins and EBF has been hard. Hoping with an extra set of hands training will be a bit easier and we can get him trained in time for school to start. Or at least close enough that he can go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830101 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 18:33:12 +0000 charlotte 2830101@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like MrsToads plan —and what MrsLonghorn said is so true! you could try using the cloth “training” underwear that are slightly absorbent? Then some mess would be contained if it does happen .... we used those for my son when he was first trained and away from the bathroom like at soccer practice and on flights. </p> <p>I feel for you on this! My daughter is almost 3, incredibly strong willed, and the more we push the potty the more she fights it. We have no choice but to let her do her own thing on her own timeline. Luckily our chosen school has no set time when they must be trained. I think we would be in the same boat as you otherwise! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830091 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 16:36:10 +0000 dolphin 2830091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm worried about the same thing. DD is turning 3 in July and starting preschool the end of August so she will be one of the younger ones (it's a combined class of first and second year preschoolers). She pees in the potty just fine but REFUSES to poop in the potty. Just won't do it. We put her in underwear at home and she will just poop in her underwear. No idea what we'll do when school starts! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830079 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 15:47:24 +0000 MrsLonghorn 2830079@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>peer pressure is one of the wonderful benefits of preschool -- I know that sounds like a crazy thing to say, but my son eats SO much better at school than he does at home, because the whole class is sitting together. Similarly, I've watched his entire class get potty trained very quickly, because they see the other kids using the toilet. I would find a way to send her even if she isn't 100% trained -- as long as it's good enough that the school won't kick you out, I think she will quickly mater it once she's around a whole class of kids who can do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830074 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 15:39:10 +0000 caitcat 2830074@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@misolee: I haven’t asked about scheduled potty breaks - that’s a great point. I’ll ask! And you’re right, the training underwear might help ease the transition a bit more. I think the total mess of accidents so far stressed her more than I anticipated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830071 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 15:36:23 +0000 caitcat 2830071@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsbells: Thanks! The vinyl covers might help contain some of the mess - I think the mess was overwhelming to her when I tried underwear last time, and it sent her over the edge instead of motivating her to make it to the potty. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2830067 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 15:19:57 +0000 misolee 2830067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just put her in underwear at home until school starts so she gets used to it. Even if it means having accidents Another suggestion would be the training pants underwear which are a little thicker than regular underwear and can help contain accidents. </p> <p>Also, not sure what kind of preschool she’s at but is there a way to find out about the schedule? I used to teach at a half day church preschool and for the threes class we had scheduled potty breaks. The kids could go anytime they wanted bc the bathroom was connected to the class but we also had scheduled breaks twice a day where each student had to go in and at least sit on the toilet. If she has those scheduled breaks, then maybe she won’t hold it in? It sounds like she’s almost there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829961 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 11:41:02 +0000 Mrsbells 2829961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you tried putting her in panties instead of pull ups when you are home? Wr did this with vinyl covers to contain some of the mess. Its a lot less comfortable than a pull up and thru feel wet and it prompts them to just tell you thru need to go first </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829939 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 11:02:35 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2829939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@caitcat: It seems to work for us. Daycare thinks he's trained and he is enough for them. </p> <p>Hopefully being with others who are all trained will manage to train your daughter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829936 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 10:56:19 +0000 caitcat 2829936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all for the support and suggestions! </p> <p>@Mrs. Toad: I like that idea! I actually think that might help this just take care of itself. My hunch is that she'd hold it for the three hours of preschool. And part of me really thinks that being around kids who are using the bathroom agreeably might just push her in the right direction. </p> <p>@bhbee: I hear you on wanting the break and to just have one kid for a little bit of time! I feel like a few hours of separation (er, preschool) a week will do wonders for all of us. :) </p> <p>@snowjewlz: Your post about things working out on your daughter's time table was so encouraging! I'm hoping something clicks for us soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829935 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 10:55:40 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2829935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would keep the spot. We had a nightmare time potty training DS and I thought it would never resolve. Withholding, constipated, accidents, you name it. But we just kept at it and we have been accident free for weeks/months, normal pee and poop schedule, etc. A lot can change in two months! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829920 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 10:15:11 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2829920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, if she can hold it during that time, I would give her a pull-up for home and underwear for preschool. As soon as she comes home, put her back in the pull-up.</p> <p>DS is 3.5 and was pee trained by daycare to move up to the next room. He now poops in his underwear in the evening or in his diaper overnight/morning. He has pooped in the toilet once or twice and given large rewards and praise and he still isn't completely potty trained. I figure he will get there when he gets there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829905 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 09:40:45 +0000 bhbee 2829905@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with keep your spot and hope to get there before school starts. Definitely a good chance she will decide to get there! Fwiw we also did laid back training and I sent both mine places like school or half day camp when they were only pee trained because they just decided they only pooped at home (asked for a diaper until they were ready to do it on potty). So if you could get that far, you might be set. </p> <p>I also think it’s totally ok to do one year of pre k from the kids perspective, but I think it was important for me to get the break and just have one kid for that time! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829902 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 09:19:49 +0000 snowjewelz 2829902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@caitcat: I had made a post recently that my stubborn 3.5 year old potty trained herself just past 3.5, so there's hope!</p> <p>I'd be stuck in a hard place like you. My DD loves school and I've really seen her thrive since she started (she started preschool this past year, then will move onto pre-k this fall). But at the same time, I am also SO happy that we waited and let her take the lead in potty training b/c we've had no accidents at all. It's so hard to say b/c she could literally be ready tomorrow, or not for another month. </p> <p>I'd tentatively say just keep your plans and hope she comes around in the next month... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829899 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 09:12:50 +0000 caitcat 2829899@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: She's been on miralax for the last four months or so, and it's made a world of difference for her! I hadn't wanted to go that route originally, but no dietary changes or anything else we tried were making enough of a difference. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829897 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 09:10:42 +0000 caitcat 2829897@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsBucky: She's in pull-ups now. She actually keeps them dry for the most part and tells me that she's peeing when she goes in them, so physically I feel like she's close. We offer going to the bathroom when she gets up, before nap, before getting in the car, before bed, etc. She agrees about 50% of the time. No incentives we've tried have made a big difference to encourage more cooperation, unfortunately. We tried switching to underwear unsuccessfully a few weeks ago - she found them in her drawer again and was very excited to wear them. She basically just held her pee in instead of going to the bathroom while wearing them though (she held from morning until about 4pm each day) and then would pee all over herself when she couldn't hold it back anymore later in the day. By the fourth day into that mess, she ended up in tears getting one of her little sister's diapers and trying to put it on because she said she didn't want to use the potty. In the meantime, she didn't poop at all for four days. She's been on Miralax for the last four months or so to try to get some of that more under control in general (she's struggled with constipation for a while), but that was still pretty atypical. </p> <p>I guess the shorter story is: I feel like she's close physically to being able to potty train because she can certainly control when she goes, but our last attempt was such a disaster, I'm worried she won't be there soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829895 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 08:59:03 +0000 caitcat 2829895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: Thanks! So at the moment, she's in pull-ups, which is a no-go for the class she'd be in. I think accidents here and there in underwear wouldn't get her kicked out, at least not at the start of the year. We've tried underwear twice before - once almost a year ago on a whim, and she legitimately wasn't ready then so we stopped...and about a month ago, when she was definitely physically capable but turned totally resistant to the idea. It was going to turn into a battle of wills, which would get us nowhere good and we backed off. </p> <p>What you said about the socialization and cooperating with teachers/other adults without mom around is the biggest reason I want her to go next year. I think she needs that for so many reasons. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829894 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 08:58:02 +0000 erinbaderin 2829894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>w/r/t the constipation issues, is she on something to help? My two year old has chronic constipation and his paediatrician recommended he be on restoralax indefinitely at least until he’s potty trained specifically for this reason, to help with potty training. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829893 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 08:45:18 +0000 MrsBucky 2829893@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@caitcat: I’m curious how un-potty trained she is. Is she in diapers full time still? Having accidents? If so, how often? Does she poop everywhere or on innplaces she is comfortable, like Home? I know my son will really only poop at home, so even though he still requests a pull up to poop, he literally hasn’t pooped anywhere but Home in over a year. But I also know that constipation impacts that in a lot of ways. What stage she is in the process would likely impact how I handled it. Also, is she excited/ interested in preschool? Does she want to go? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829890 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 08:33:17 +0000 Foodnerd81 2829890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How strict are they? Like, if she still has occasional accidents are they going to kick her out? I feel like at 3.5 she’s probably going to be potty trained soon, if not by sept. And I would hate to change plans for a full year based on a month of occasional accidents. So as an outsider, I say i would just work as hard as I could on potty training for the next couple months and keep my plans. BUT i haven’t potty trained a difficult potty trainer- my daughter is very stubborn but took to potty training easily so that’s my only experience. </p> <p>An d I know some people do only one year of preK. I felt that my daughter needed it for the socialization (both with kids, which she could have gotten elsewhere, but also with the teachers and other authority figures without me present). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/preschool-options-potty-training-dilemma#post-2829888 Thu, 21 Jun 2018 08:27:29 +0000 caitcat 2829888@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Looking for some preschool advice for my three and a half year old, who might not be potty trained in time to start preschool where we currently have a spot reserved. </p> <p>We're up against her exceptionally strong will and some chronic constipation issues that are complicating potty training, and I'm not sure that the stars will align for her to be potty trained, which is required by the school where we'd like to send her by the end of August. It's still two months off and plenty could change, but I'm trying to think ahead through some other options if we need them.</p> <p>I'm debating finding a different preschool that doesn't require potty training for her age (which is proving hard to find - I've found one with open slots) or not sending her to preschool next year. She'd still have one year of preschool that she could attend before Kindergarten the following year, but pretty much everyone I know around here does two or more years of preschool. I take her to art, dance, etc classes through our local parks and rec program now and would continue doing that if we pass on preschool next year, so she has some opportunities like that - but those aren't the same as a more formal preschool setting. </p> <p>What do you think of just considering one year of preschool? Would she be missing out too much? The other school I found without potty training requirements isn't nearly as convenient for us location-wise (it's about 20 minutes away driving, compared to the one we were hoping for...which is a 5-minute walk) or as ideal in terms of its hours (it goes until 2pm, which I'm worried would interrupt a decent afternoon nap for my younger one). Those things aren't deal breakers, but they are less than ideal. Granted, we're in a less than ideal state right now, so maybe I shouldn't be as particular! </p> <p>Sorry this turned into a novel - I appreciate any advice! </p>