https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 21 May 2026 07:44:15 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034763 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 22:24:59 +0000 ALV91711 2034763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs mama. What a hard situation. I think finding a new sitter with some more experience is a good idea. You need someone who isn't afraid of the crying and can distract her. It may take a few days of crying but eventually she'll come around.</p> <p>Being around other babies and kids while you aren't there is a good idea too. Then they can distract her. </p> <p>When DS started daycare at 12 months they said that the babies cry a lot in the first few days but then they get used to it. This was true for DS and now at 22 months he barely says bye to me in the morning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034656 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 21:14:07 +0000 Madison43 2034656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: oh man, that sounds awful. I totally agree that a new sitter with more confidence and experience is in order. Someone is going to have to be able to take charge, be creative and try new things to keep your daughter engaged, instead of just taking the (sad) path of least resistance. I wonder if there are other sitters with babies that could come over for playdates? Or maybe a class? My last thought is that you mentioned you work from home. I work from home once or twice a week and if my 15 month old can see me, she becomes a total cling on, even though she loves her nanny. If I disappear into my office for a while, she's fine. Does she act the same way if you disappear for a while? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034597 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 20:39:34 +0000 HTownMom 2034597@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: I agree with @Apples4Teacher: to try to find a sitter that watches other kids so that she can get more interaction. Also, it will help LO realize that she can have fun while you are away with those other kids.</p> <p>Further, my LO went through intense seperation anxiety around 10 months and it lasted about a month. For a lot of kids this goes in stages for a couple of years I think!</p> <p>Last, don't beat yourself up about things! You baby loves you and you are doing an amazing job! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034522 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 19:49:54 +0000 smores 2034522@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: I think having her go to a sitter who watches other kids may be a good idea too! My DS goes to an in-home daycare where he is the youngest baby there and the teachers are always commenting on how much he loves to watch the other kids. Maybe having the action and distraction of the other kids would help distract her from the fact that she is away from you! Perhaps you could start the process by going there with her and staying there with her the first couple of times so she doesn't automatically start associating the place or person with a separation from you.</p> <p>Good luck!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034442 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 18:25:14 +0000 teawithpaloma 2034442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: Cost really isn't a factor so I think I will set up some more interviews and get a feel for different people. There are also some casual drop-in situations for babysitters with another kid so I can look into that. I am going to continue to work on this but it was really validating to hear that I am not crazy and this situation is stressful and needs to be resolved in one way or another. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034434 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 18:09:47 +0000 spaniellove 2034434@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our situation is a bit different, but our LO also has issues with public screaming and needing to soothe. It's really tough. It does sound like your current sitter may not be the right person to build enough of a bond with your LO and help her work through this. You mentioned cost being an obstacle to hiring a different sitter...it might be worth it though to meet with a few and get a feel for their experience and confidence levels. You might be surprised at how someone unexpected can just click with her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034386 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 17:29:03 +0000 MenagerieMama 2034386@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Following because my LO is 3.5 mo and we are on our second week with a different nanny and she has just screamed constantly. Won't even take a bottle. The first nanny was resorting to the crib option too because she eventually cries herself to sleep which is why we switched. So far day one with the new nanny has not been better...I wish I had a suggestion! I'll let you know if we find something that works. Im sorry though - it's the worst feeling! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034351 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 16:50:49 +0000 fuzzypeaches 2034351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: so many hugs! We've all been in a place where we look back and think we should've done something different!<br /> You can fix it :) they are so little they don't remember anything! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034239 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:48:54 +0000 .twist. 2034239@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: I agree about finding a new sitter. When you do, maybe have them come by while you're home a few times (or for a week straight or something) before actually getting her to babysit (if financially possible) and hang out with her and have her kind of start to bond with the new sitter WHILE you're there so that your DD feels comfortable. Then, when it's time for you to go to work the following week, she's already used to this new person and it won't be such a shock? Good Luck mama. Don't beat yourself up about this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034235 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:46:18 +0000 blackbird 2034235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: Nah it's ok! I mean, your baby's not going to remember this and maybe she'll click with another sitter better, ya know?! Someone with more experience may know exactly how to do this, how to ease into a relationship with her, slowly engaging her and bringing out her personality, whereas your current sitter is just overwhelmed by the idea. It takes kids awhile to warm up to new people! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034198 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:36:43 +0000 Orchid 2034198@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: :heart: Wish I could hug you! Just regroup and march on mama! We've all made our fair share of parenting decisions we regret. AND, it's easy for ppl on the internet to weigh in with declarative suggestions, we aren't there hearing the baby scream with no end in sight. You made a decision you thought was in your LO's best interest! If you now change your mind, move forward with your new plan! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034174 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:28:28 +0000 teawithpaloma 2034174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Leah: @fuzzypeaches: @blackbird: OMG I feel like crying. I think this started because we both agreed it was better for her to sleep then to cry all day but now I see your point that we should have worked back up to engagement. I think I agree I need someone else who can take my feedback and have the confidence to deal with the crying baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034166 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:25:34 +0000 Orchid 2034166@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: that doesn't sound right! I agree with @blackbird: that babysitter needs to go ASAP. She isn't making any effort! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034160 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:24:19 +0000 fuzzypeaches 2034160@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: yes I think you need a new babysitter!<br /> She should be able to handle a crying baby (public or not) and definitely needs to tolerate her misery. It might be hard at first but she will realize that being out if the crib is way more fun. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034151 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:22:26 +0000 blackbird 2034151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@teawithpaloma: WTF? Fire her ass and get someone else. </p> <p>I'd be more pissed that she left my child in her crib all day intentionally, without any attention, without even trying, instead of consistently trying to build a relationship with her (and maybe having some bad days in the process) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034143 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:20:22 +0000 teawithpaloma 2034143@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: Right! I like my sitter, shes in her early 20s but I think someone with decades of confidence might take charge more. </p> <p>She doesn't take her out of the crib except for a bottle and a diaper change. </p> <p>:( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034132 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:18:32 +0000 blackbird 2034132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She sounds like a "mama or nobody" kind of gal. I would keep working on having the nanny try to engage her outside of her naps. IE she doesn't stay in a crib or something.</p> <p>then your babysitter isn't doing her job, IMO </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034130 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:18:16 +0000 teawithpaloma 2034130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think part of the problem is my babysitter now lacks all confidence because she has cried out on the very public street where we live! I get it - how embarrassing to be out with a screaming baby! I budged the babysitter to keep her awake and she said that she'll be so miserable she can't stand to do that to her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034120 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:16:18 +0000 fuzzypeaches 2034120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This sounds terrible :( is it possible for the sitter to take her out to the park or even a walk or something that she usually enjoys? That way she's not "sleeping " and is doing something fun that might help distract her? </p> <p>My LO loses it everytime I go to work (although thankfully gets over it) and that helped a lot at the beginning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/prolonged-naps-to-avoid-babysitter#post-2034110 Wed, 21 Jan 2015 15:13:22 +0000 teawithpaloma 2034110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's taken me a long time to write this because I honestly feel so embarrassed at the current situation but I am desperate to help my little girl. I work part-time from home 10-20 hours a week and have had the same babysitter coming to my home since my daughter was 4 months until present (10 months). Her separation anxiety is intense. Once she realizes its the babysitter and mama is leaving (either while awake or after she wakes up from naps) she will freak out. It used to be long bouts of crying but now she just shuts down and only wants to nap or rest quietly away from the sitter. She will take a bottle and have her diaper changed (albeit while crying) and then just wants to be left alone until mama comes back. Based on our schedule this combines our morning and afternoon nap so she's basically sleeping or sort-of sleeping from 9 - 3. There haven't been terrible consequences for her sleep but isn't it just awful to imagine her so miserable? This has been the situation since she was about 5.5 - 6 months old. She has done it for other babysitters so its not a particular aversion to the one she knows.</p> <p>Gosh I would love some actionable advice or a story about how a similarly willful and mama-attached child grew out of this at this point. </p>