https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 06 May 2026 07:37:34 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404283 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:33:50 +0000 deactivated_account 1404283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Oh I see the issue with day care. But in elementary school I assume your child will be in the same place with the same kids for years. But under any circumstance, I cannot imagine sending my child to a house supervised by people I do not know well enough to trust. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404277 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:32:00 +0000 indi 1404277@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sketchbook: We'll have to ask my IL's to do a good sweep as well to make sure everything is in its proper (and secured) place. They like to keep hunting rifles in the closets, and once LO is older, she'll go looking. </p> <p>Even if they don't think so, I know how inquisitive and sneaky kids can be…you should have seen my mother's face when we were chatting a year or two ago and my brothers mentioned taking out and shooting outside with the small handgun in her second drawer when we were younger (elementary). Panties stop no one! She was horrified about all the gun and weapon stories we had, they truly thought we didn't know where they were or how to use them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404259 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:26:51 +0000 Mrs. Twine 1404259@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't have my feelings hurt by any of it. It's a fairly serious issue, and I wouldn't blame a parent or caregiver for being proactive and wanting that information. Ours are in a locked safe in the office, which is several hundred feet away from the main house. Oddly enough, though, I'm not sure how comfortable I would feel asking the same question of someone else. I do think most of the people we associate with (which isn't that many) I am aware of whether or not they are gun owners and if they are, the general level of "security" they have going on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404258 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:26:50 +0000 looch 1404258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsMcD: let's see when we get there. I am a pretty good judge of character and I generally know who I want to include in my circle or not. I just find it difficult now to know the 8 sets of parents in my son's daycare class that changes regularly as kids age in and out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404230 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:20:17 +0000 Mrs. Sketchbook 1404230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate this situation. All the grandparents in our LO's life have guns....as in plural. I don't have any issue with gun ownership but DH and I have opted not to have them until our kid/kids are older and we party less (ok, we actually never party, but before we have kids, partying was our reason not to have guns). I feel like I would have offended my family to ask them this question.</p> <p>My cousin never got to spend the night at our house when she was a kid because we had guns!</p> <p>When I was a little girl my aunt and uncle told us to NEVER touch the third drawer down in my aunt's tall jewelry cabinet. I think I was in my 20s before I realized what that was all about. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1404177 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 15:07:45 +0000 deactivated_account 1404177@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I think you absolutely can know the parents of your elementary school child's friends and those parents' relevant situations. My mom was a single working mom who raised me and my sister and she knew all of the parents of our friends when we were little. There were a few friends whose houses I was not allowed to visit. I went to a fairly normal sized public school as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1403961 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 14:30:52 +0000 wheres_c 1403961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I actually asked a friend today. I saw what seemed to be a gun safe within reach of my LO, and I realized I should probably start asking this question.</p> <p>She told me that her hubs had a gun but it was locked in a safe in her bedroom. That was good enough for me for today. I need to think about my stance moving forward. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners/page/2#post-1403642 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 13:17:43 +0000 brownie 1403642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did this. We were at a friends house for a house warming and putting our son down (he was 18 months old) in a pack and play in their room. There was a gun on the nightstand. My husband just asked if it was unloaded and they (the host and my husband) double checked it. My son had never gotten out of his pack and play and showed no possibility of getting out that night but they still checked. There was no issue with doing that at all by the host. If we hadn't seen it, we probably wouldn't have thought to ask about it though. Even though I knew they had guns etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403599 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 13:07:04 +0000 BananaPancakes 1403599@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: It's your kid, I think you get to make the call. If this is something that concerns you, then I think it's your right to ask, personally. If you're rude about it (which I doubt you would be), then they might be rude back, but if you're genuinely concerned, then I don't see how someone can be upset. It might be uncomfortable, but it's still important. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403596 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 13:06:44 +0000 HLK208 1403596@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't be offended in the slightest (although, it would be uncomfortable if they wanted to see the safe since it's stored behind some personal stuff on the top shelf of my husbands closet) and I would totally ask other parents.</p> <p>Even when LO's are older, I always want to call the parent before my child goes to their house and it will be one of the questions I ask. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403588 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 13:04:51 +0000 indi 1403588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I'd ask, but like PPs have said, try to be non-confrontational about it. More of a calling to confirm the kids want to get together, what the plans are, etc. And then just bring it up like @BananaPancakes: stated, except maybe be more straight out and ask if they have their weapons stored in a locked safe (shortens the conversation of "yes, we have guns" "oh, how are they stored?" etc…). We would find that sort of question totally reasonable and in-line with other important questions like allergies, if there will be a parent supervising, etc. And I'll probably take my mother's approach when LO is that age and be the person to drop them off at the play date (rather than going there right from school) so I know where it is and who they're with, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403564 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:58:38 +0000 looch 1403564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I guess what I am asking is more like a situation when kids are in elementary school. You can't possibly know all the parents and living situations of everyone that your kid goes to school with, that's like a full time job! So, in the event that your/my kid becomes friends with someone and I dont know the parents, this is where it becomes a gray area for me.</p> <p>Do I not allow him to play over there until I am confident I know the parents, or do I ask and get it over with and out there? It's more rhetorical than anything at this point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403561 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:58:24 +0000 BananaPancakes 1403561@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Honestly, couldn't you just say "I hate to pry, but one of my big fears are kids and guns, so I was just curious if you have guns in your house?" If they do, I'd assume that question would lead to a conversation that you would be able to make a decision from on if you were comfortable or not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403532 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:51:14 +0000 Lindsay05 1403532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I think you have to be responsible about what you can control. You cant control other people so teach your children about gun safety. Even if you think they will never be exposed to a gun, it doesnt hurt to still teach them the safety around them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403520 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:47:35 +0000 MrsTiz 1403520@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: You could always try and bring it up casually, saying "oh Bobby is really into everything these days so just as a heads up I'd put away anything you don't want little hands in! You know, like medicine, guns, blah blah" instead of "Hi, nice to meet you, do you have guns and if yes may I see where you keep them?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403464 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:33:11 +0000 looch 1403464@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am not sure how I will handle it when my son gets older, what do you do when they make friends with kids in school?</p> <p>You don't know the parents, you might now them through school only. What are we supposed to ask? I'd really like an honest answer in the form of a question from a gun owner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403453 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:31:27 +0000 luckypenny 1403453@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>None of my IRL friends are gun owners and I'd ask if there are any guns in the home and to see how they were stored. You hear too many news stories where a kid shooting was involved in "responsible gun owners" homes, like a police officer etc...I just don't take chances like that with my kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403452 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:31:23 +0000 indi 1403452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We wouldn't be offended at all, but guns are pretty common around here and I think it's all in the way you present the question. </p> <p>If I were the one inquiring, I'd be sure to ask if the guns are stored in a locked safe and out of the reach of children, because as others have said, some folks may think that "in my nightstand with the safety on" is safe enough. Nope! I'd be mostly gauging their response and how emotional they get, honestly, not interested in personally checking it out. Anyone pissy about it would put me a bit more on edge and we'd likely arrange dates outside the home. </p> <p>@Mrs. Jump Rope: Yikes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403443 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:29:13 +0000 LuLu Mom 1403443@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: @Beyond2: Agreed, we are in a region that I just assume that everyone has a gun in their house. I have no problem them asking me about storing safely (or asking myself, although I have never), but I think it's personal asking to see where we store them and check for themselves. </p> <p>The only time we "show off" our guns is if my husband buys a new rifle or something and his friend wants to see it, in that case it's done away from the children and curious eyes. </p> <p>I know that my BFF's husband has a handgun in their nightstand, I have yet to leave my daughter over there unattended because of this knowledge. My daughter is curious &amp; I don't trust a drawer to keep her out from a loaded/unlocked handgun. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403423 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:23:56 +0000 Weagle 1403423@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jump Rope: Just reading that both terrifies and infuriates me. That is completely beyond my ability to comprehend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403420 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:22:55 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1403420@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I don't know. I panicked and wasn't very nice about it. I asked her to take her bag downstairs and lock it in the safe. I didn't exactly make it sound like an option:</p> <p>I'm still upset nearly two years later. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403414 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:20:20 +0000 mrbee 1403414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jump Rope: Wow! Was it loaded? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403410 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:18:43 +0000 Lindsay05 1403410@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband got offended when our dr asked if we had guns in our house and didnt ask about drugs or alcohol.</p> <p>I personally wouldnt be offended if someone asked if we store them safely but asking to see them would be pushy. I would ask them if they lock up their scissors and knives because they can be just as dangerous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403398 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 12:12:20 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1403398@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not be offended in the least.</p> <p>Not everyone has common sense. You hope they do, but..</p> <p>Chloe was about 8 months old and very mobile when we were visiting a family member. A female relative casually mentioned that her husband recently bought her a handgun, and did I want to see it? And then she reached down into her purse NEXT TO MY KID. I nearly had a heart attack. Chloe was extremely curious at that age and had no boundaries; she easily could have gone into the purse! We even had to remind this individual to not bring the gun into our home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403330 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:50:44 +0000 MsLipGloss 1403330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: It's a judgment call, whether you stay there with your kids or not. If you don't trust them, or trust that the environment is safe, then you don't stay. Seems pretty straight forward to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403298 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:46:04 +0000 mrbee 1403298@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: Never said I'd leave my kids with them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403262 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:38:09 +0000 kiddosc 1403262@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @MrsTiz: that this can be a really regional thing. I grew up in an area where guns were not prevalent and then moved to TX when I got together with DH. I think that here, there are many people with weapons in the home/in their cars/on their person, and it's just not as much of an issue. I think many people I know around here would be surprised that it was a concern to a parent who brought their child over. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403260 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:37:55 +0000 rattles 1403260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I guess I just wouldn't leave my kids with someone whose judgment I didn't trust.</p> <p>I wouldn't mind at all if someone asked whether we had guns or stored them safely. I think like many other things, the way it's asked makes a difference in the way it's received. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403236 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:32:01 +0000 MsLipGloss 1403236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: I totally agree. </p> <p>@MrBee: If you don't trust the homeowner's judgment/response, why would you leave your kids with them? ETA: And liability does not = prevention. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/question-for-gun-owners#post-1403224 Thu, 06 Feb 2014 11:27:25 +0000 Beyond2 1403224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would definitely not be offended if someone asked me if my guns are stored safely. I would be irritated if you insisted on seeing how they are stored though. Our guns are in a locked safe but I am very strongly opinionated on the idea that we do not show our guns to people just for the heck of it. </p> <p>Skeet shooting party where I am actively using a gun and you want to take a look it- fine. Come into my home and ask to see a gun (even a friend or family member) and I have an issue with that. I don't ever want my children to think that "showing off guns" is acceptable. </p>