https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 04:27:35 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1577170 Fri, 18 Apr 2014 10:21:07 +0000 SugarplumsMom 1577170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry your DH is being insensitive :sad: I would be upset and hurt, too. I think the pp are right, in that you should show him what you wrote. I hope he realizes and makes it up to you soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1577150 Fri, 18 Apr 2014 10:05:19 +0000 MsLipGloss 1577150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>While I agree he was being insensitive, I also think it's unfair that you expect him to read your mind. If it wasn't okay for him to leave you with your toddler, you should have said so, instead of being angry that he left after you told him it was okay to leave. Same with the amount of time he was gone. You could have called him to ask him to come back, etc. Communication really is key. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1577095 Fri, 18 Apr 2014 09:47:17 +0000 edelweiss 1577095@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>aw, i'm really sorry you're going through this. your frustration is completely understandable. i agree with the others that telling him calmly your perspective and what you need going forward is a good idea. although @Mae:'s idea got a chuckle out of me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1577087 Fri, 18 Apr 2014 09:44:18 +0000 psw27 1577087@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hope you are feeling better and you spoke with your DH. I love @mae's suggestion, even though I know its likely not realistic. I think it is really important you speak with him about how disappointed and upset you are. good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1577047 Fri, 18 Apr 2014 09:24:39 +0000 Applesandbananas 1577047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband lives by the adage of "it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission". Sounds like that's what your husband was thinking... I have no good advice, just commiseration. </p> <p>I hope you feel better soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576640 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 23:17:42 +0000 lady grey 1576640@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@OpinionsLikeKittens: I second this. His behavior is not ok at all! ugh! I hope you guys can talk about it soon so you feel more supported in the future.<br /> Also def recommend you both read this book:<br /> <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609805797" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0609805797</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576568 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 21:36:49 +0000 reverie 1576568@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm very angry for you and don't have nice words for your husband now. This is seriously inconsiderate and my husband would be VERY SORRY if he treated me like this b/c he very literally would NEVER hear the end of it. </p> <p>I hope you feel better soon and that your kids are calm tomorrow. He owes you big time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576557 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 21:32:45 +0000 Weagle 1576557@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be hurt too. Have you told him these things or are you expecting him to just figure it out on his own? Sometimes men are clueless! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576474 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 20:55:47 +0000 tequiero21 1576474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, very inconsiderate. I would be pissed, not hurt. Please talk to him, hopefully, it's just a matter of cluelessness and not just being inconsiderate. Does your mom or someone else live around u that can help? Hugs! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576450 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 20:43:41 +0000 Mae 1576450@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: That's a saner suggestion than what I was going to say (turn off her phone and check herself into a hotel for the night and spend tomorrow seeing a movie, getting a massage and pedicure and mosey in tomorrow night around 5 asking what's for dinner)... lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576347 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 20:15:05 +0000 MamaMoose 1576347@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yikes. Does the room you're sleeping in have a lock on the door. I'd lock yourself in there tonight and let your husband fend for himself all night!!!!</p> <p>I'm kidding, kind of. But you need to have a serious conversation about how you two need to be EQUAL partners in your marriage and in parenting your kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576258 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 19:40:59 +0000 regberadaisy 1576258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry. I would be incredibly disappointed as well. I echo the other ladies that you need to talk to him. </p> <p>Big hugs! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576252 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 19:38:35 +0000 chopsuey 1576252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ugh, wrote a long comment and accidentally closed my browser. </p> <p>I think you should definitely sit down with your husband, tell him how you're feeling and let him know exactly what you need/expect from him. Sometimes men are clueless and need things spelled out. If he says he wants to go to work for a little bit, say no. Sorry you had a rough day, and hope your husband does a better job helping you. Hoping for a speedy recovery! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576241 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 19:34:40 +0000 swedishfish 1576241@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CraftyMom13: I would sit him down and tell him exactly what you wrote. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-dissapointed-in-my-husband#post-1576223 Thu, 17 Apr 2014 19:24:46 +0000 CraftyMom13 1576223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>After our daughter was born both DH and I agreed we did not want anymore kids and with my health having another pregnancy would be risky. We have 4 kids in all and 3 with special needs. I've been bugging him to get a vasectomy for awhile but he did not want to because the procedure freaked him out so I decided to get a tubal ligation. I'm still nursing our 18 month old and leading up to my surgery my DH agreed to help me night wean her. He never ended up helping me so she is still nursing at night. Before my surgery yesterday we agreed he would take off 2 days of work and help me the first 2 nights after surgery. Yesterday he did a decent job helping me until 11pm when he brought our daughter into me to nurse. He never came back to get her and I was in to much pain to get out of bed so she laid with me nursing all night and I didn't get any sleep. DH came in at 6:30am to see how I was feeling and I told him I didn't get any sleep and was feeling crappy. He said he wanted to go into work to help his friend get his tractor done(DH owns his own business and works for himself). I agreed he could go for a little while and requested he take our 5 year old to school. DH left at 7:45 and I didn't hear anything from him until 20 minutes before our 5 year old needed picked up from school. At this point I'm annoyed and mad. I just had surgery and here I am home alone running around after our extremely busy 18 month old. DH asked if he should pick DS up from school but intended to go back to work immediately after. I told him I would just do it. I picked up DS and spend the remainder of my day running after our extremely busy kids. DH did not get home until 5pm! Come to find out his friend's tractor parts didn't even come in today so he wasn't even working on the damn tractor! I'm so disappointed in my husbands lack of empathy and his lack of effort to take care of me. I had this surgery for both of us and I feel like he doesn't care. Here I am in pain running around after kids and he doesn't seem to see anything wrong with leaving me. He's just going about his night as if nothing is wrong with his actions. I don't even know what to say to him because I'm just so hurt by how everything has played out since last night. </p>