https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 19 May 2026 06:50:08 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1185862 Wed, 30 Oct 2013 17:12:05 +0000 Fronkinzankinsbride 1185862@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When my closest friend gave birth there were a lot of people present. my girlfriend and I were essentially the baby mamas for her through the whole thing. So we had the three mamas, another close friend, the midwife, nurse, student nurse, doula and doula assistant. (we were at OHSU not a home birth.) Her l&amp;d from start to finish was only 4 hours and she was so in the zone the entire time that our team never felt like a crowd. We only have pictures that we took on our phones which is sufficient but quality photos would be so nice. Especially I think for the mama giving birth because I think things are hard to remember when you're in that intense of a situation. </p> <p>Labor is (usually) a long process so not all of the people are in your face all of the time. If you choose the right people and explain what you expect from them I think it's totally doable to have the additional two people. If she's a professional photographer they usually know how to quietly blend in and stay out of the way. One compromise is have them on call. So they aren't spending 12 hours with you but maybe drop in for half an hour of laboring, come back to capture the birth, make themselves scarce again and then a couple family photos when y'all are ready. I think it's worth it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1185821 Wed, 30 Oct 2013 16:55:44 +0000 Vegmama 1185821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Thank you for the extra encouragement. I feel like such a hypocrite, but like you said, we've been less worried about documenting every. single. thing. ... It really is about living in the moment, and I think it's more beautiful that way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1185809 Wed, 30 Oct 2013 16:53:46 +0000 Mae 1185809@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Vegmama: I didn't comment before because I wasn't sure that it would be helpful, but now that you've decided against it I thought I'd tell you that I think you made the right call! I am also a photographer and honestly one thing I've been really trying to do in my own life is PUT DOWN the camera and be more present in the moment without worrying so much about documentation. I think there is something very sacred about that first private moment that may be even more special because it will live on only in your memories. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1185799 Wed, 30 Oct 2013 16:52:25 +0000 Mrs. Pen 1185799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Vegmama: I think it sounds like too much to have your friends do it... if it were someone you didn't know as intimately it might be different. you said they have different birthing philosophies- you don't want to be tense or feeling judged while giving birth!! That alone can stall labor. </p> <p>Your birth sounds like it will be beautiful! I think having your spouse take pictures sounds like a good compromise. It may be not as many and he won't be in them but it is some and you'll still have newborn pictures to do as a family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1185787 Wed, 30 Oct 2013 16:48:49 +0000 Vegmama 1185787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Soooo ... We decided to NOT have the birth photographed. We still have time to change our minds, but for now, I feel really great about our decision. My partner said he'd take photos throughout the day/night (he's a professional photographer), and we both agreed that there will be no shortage of photos while LO is in those first precious days.</p> <p>My privacy, and desire to labor/birth relatively alone outweighed my designer to have photos. I do think I'll regret not having photos from the moment we meet our baby, but hopefully our memories will serve us well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1165411 Tue, 22 Oct 2013 09:01:41 +0000 Alivoo01 1165411@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't do hynobirthing, but I did have my labor and delivery photographed and I absolutely loved it!!! If it was between newborn vs birth photography, I would have chosen birth. Hands down!! I like @Mrs.Someone: 's suggestion on bringing your friend with you to birth photo sessions if you have some coming up before your own to get her more comfortable with the idea and give her tips. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1165070 Tue, 22 Oct 2013 05:52:23 +0000 lamariniere 1165070@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this is a completely personal decision. I had a hospital birth and did not want anyone other than DH and necessary personnel. Birth, and the time after it are so precious and special. I did not feel the need to capture it on film or share it with anyone. While we don't have any photos of the birth in progress, we have some that DH took within a an hour of delivery after the medical team had cleared out and those photos and the memories I have are good enough for me. I definitely don't regret it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164681 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 20:24:35 +0000 sarac 1164681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My plan was also a hypnobirth, and I struggled with this. I wanted photography, but I didn't want additional people in the room. I ended up with a fairly medicalized birth, and I was very glad that I'd made that call. The energy in the room was very important to me, and additional people (especially those not fully in agreement with my birth plan!) would have been an unwelcome distraction.</p> <p>During the pushing phase, I felt very strong, beautiful, powerful - but still, I declined the use of a mirror. I thought, you know, better to just feel this way, and leave the actual visual reality of it (24+ hours of puking and birth disappointment) aside. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164408 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 18:36:47 +0000 runsyellowlites 1164408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I would look for someone else that could do it, but have my 2 friends on stand by &amp; just play it by ear. I really wanted birth photography for P's birth but ended up not having it &amp; really really regretted it. For months it upset me that I didn't have it. I remembered my birth well enough to write a pretty detailed birth story, but I was also really out of it when I hit transition so it's all kind of a blur too. </p> <p>I do like @emg86 idea of maybe setting up some camera's and just having your team snap pics periodically. That might work. Idk how that didn't happen at our birth but I seriously only have ONE shot of me taken on DH's phone and it's horrible quality. :(</p> <p>Plus, you can always start out with your friends there &amp; then ask them to leave if you're needing space.. Something tells me you probably wouldn't even notice them though. I know by the end I wasn't all that aware of who was/wasn't around. lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164389 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 18:29:41 +0000 Vegmama 1164389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: Thank you so much for sharing your perspective!! I think there's something really special about NOT having anyone there with us. Just really enjoying the birth with the two of us (plus midwives), and having our memories to reflect back on. Did you write a birth story? I'd love to read it!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164343 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 18:02:19 +0000 Mrs.Someone 1164343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Are you photographing any births between now and your EDD? If so, maybe your friend can go along with you so she doesn't feel uncomfortable attending yours without her husband. Otherwise, stick to your instincts, less people is good, but you DO want those photos... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164328 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 17:45:06 +0000 Foodnerd81 1164328@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a hospital birth and did not do any hypnobirthing classes or anything, but I did have a med free birth and did not have a photographer. We don't have photos of those first moments, which in some ways makes me a little bit sad, but not really, because I have wonderful feelings about my birth experience and I was totally focused on the birth, and then on my baby and new little family, rather than on if someone was getting the right shot. Granted, I'm sure as photographers, pictures are a lot more important to you. But to me, the experience and being present in the moment was much more important than photographs of it. </p> <p>I was only in the hospital for 4 hours before having her, but most of the time it was just me, DH, midwife, and nurse. It went pretty quickly so maybe the theory of more people=more time is on to something. A lot of people came in at the end due to minor complications and it was a different vibe for sure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164319 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 17:37:58 +0000 emg86 1164319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a home birth &amp; spent a lot of time debating whether or not I wanted a birth photographer...most likely my SIL there. We had two midwives &amp; a doula (who is also training to be a midwife) &amp; my husband. At the end of the day I decided that having more people around would get in the way of me "relaxing" and just being comfortable. I set up cameras &amp; asked the midwives &amp; doula to snap pictures (especially during important moments). They all did a wonderful job of capturing those moments for us, so I was happy &amp; edited the pictures myself a few months ago. I don't regret not having a birth photographer. I think having more people there would have also made my husband uncomfortable although he kept telling me we could so whatever we wanted. Maybe play it by ear? I told my SIL I didn't know what I would end up wanting so we would just let her know when things got going &amp; she was totally cool with that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164314 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 17:34:09 +0000 travelingnanny 1164314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is such a personal choice. I think I would find someone else to take the photos. That way it is one less person but you still get the photos. Are you set on having the student there? Or maybe you can have a group of people rotate going in/ out of the room (like your mom, the student, and the photographer). That way everyone isn't in there at once.</p> <p>ETA- As someone who has never given birth, I say less people is better. I wouldn't have a photographer and would just count on my mom and husband to take photos. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164308 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 17:31:28 +0000 PurplePeony 1164308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Congrats! We're also expecting our first and, although I don't want the birth itself photographed, I just though I'd mention something our Hypnobirthing instructor said in class last night -- apparently every "extra" person you have around during the birth, aside from your birthing team (which is partner, doula/other support person, and medical providers) adds at least an extra hour to your labor. She said that in her experience, it's usually even more than that. So if you're not 100% comfortable with the photographers, you really might want to reconsider having them there. </p> <p>I know this wouldn't get you pictures of the quality you want, but maybe your hubby could set up a camera on a tripod someplace safe, focus it in, and then use a remote or timer to get pics? At least you'd have some photos but wouldn't have to worry about the extra people. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/really-torn-about-birth-photography#post-1164270 Mon, 21 Oct 2013 17:05:17 +0000 Vegmama 1164270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Long post ahead!! </p> <p>Soooo, DH &amp; I are expecting our first LO this January. We're both photographers, and for the past 5 years, I've specialized in birth photography. I find it so empowering, and special ... I've loved capturing these moments for other couples, and I always thought I'd want it for myself.</p> <p>Now that we're less than 3 months from the birth, I am questioning whether I want anyone there. More details: we're having a home birth. We'll have our 2 midwives, a student midwife, us, and possibly my mom (she lives very far, but we're hoping she'll be here). </p> <p>Our photographers (as of now) are our best friends (a husband/wife photography team). She was uncomfortable doing the photography alone, because she's never seen a birth, but he offered to come as well, and now she's fine with it.</p> <p>My problem lies here ... I don't really want TWO more people here. We're planning a hypnobirth + yoga style of birthing, and I know relaxation is totally key to a successful birth. It has nothing to do with modesty. I think birth is beautiful, and I'm happy to share it with everyone ... I'm just worried about my ability to concentrate with so many people. </p> <p>They are our BEST friends, but their philosophies on birth aren't the same (another issue), and I just feel like I'll regret having SOOO many people at our house.</p> <p>I REALLY want photos, and I feel like I'll regret it if we don't have them. Maybe I should just keep looking for another photographer (I've scoured our area for someone who has work I really love, and nothing). </p> <p>Did you have your birth photographed? If not, do you regret it? I'd love some perspective from you mamas! Such a tough choice!</p> <p>Lastly, my hubby has said that he'll want to take a few photos along the way, but obviously, when we're in active labor + the birth, he'll be coaching me. I worry that our first moments after meeting our baby will not be documented, and I'll be sad. </p>