https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 23:47:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736424 Tue, 16 May 2017 08:19:06 +0000 Mrs D 2736424@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Fronkinzankinsbride: thats a good point - I hadnt thought about the one neighbor mentioning out of excitement...</p> <p>Oy folks...the plot thickened last night and left me in the most uncomfortable conversation of my life - like if there had been a hole in the ground I would have buried myself just to get out of it...</p> <p>We now know the selling neighbor is a very close minded catholic who is harsh to say the least....thankfully a wonderful older neighbor who has years of experience gracefully putting people in their place was involved and took charge of things... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736334 Mon, 15 May 2017 20:00:21 +0000 MrsBrewer 2736334@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This actually happened to me a little while ago. The house across the street from us sold, and it was to 2 men in a relationship. But my neighbor had to come and gossip once she had met and talked to them. My response was "I can't wait to meet them, and welcome them to our neighborhood!" Simple as that. I didn't want to add in any negativity. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736264 Mon, 15 May 2017 17:24:00 +0000 Foodnerd81 2736264@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am sure that would come up in my neighborhood. On our street of 16 houses, one is for sale by owner and the seller is really wanting a nice young family to buy it. I certainly hope she just means any nice family, but if the couple or family who bought it were gay, I'm sure everyone on the street would know ahead of time, the same way they all knew DH and I had two little girls before we moved in. Every family in our street has a mom and a dad so it would be notable, I guess. The only part that strikes me as weird- and very weird at that- is the "are you ok with that?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736260 Mon, 15 May 2017 17:17:13 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2736260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think if saying they are lesbians on the same level as saying they have two kids or whatever, just factual info. </p> <p>The asking if you're comfortable with that is awkward.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736239 Mon, 15 May 2017 16:25:46 +0000 Fronkinzankinsbride 2736239@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't personally find it offensive for someone to give people a heads up. I live in pretty conservative area so if you tell someone it's a nice young family their perception in their head is not going to include the possibility of a same gender couple. Much like when people apologize to me for assuming I'm straight --because what else would I be?? If neighbors know in advance perhaps they can process the information before the new neighbor moves in and they have to hide the shock on their face in front of them when it's not who they had imagined. The only thing that would be exceptionally weird is if she hadn't decided whether to accept their offer ok the house and was gauging your reaction as a way to decide against it. Then maybe I'd think she's just being an a-hole. As far as the other woman who mentioned it also that doesn't strike me as odd at all! I would be excited for new queers to move into my neighborhood so I might tell everyone too. ❤️</p> <p>Eta: it's not really their "sexual preferences" that are being discussed here but the makeup of their family, their (likely assumed) gender identities, and possibily their cultural identity. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736229 Mon, 15 May 2017 16:03:38 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2736229@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's weird at all that your neighbors are bringing up that the couple is gay. I find that people want to latch on to something to gossip about whether it's spread because they are happy about it or suspicious. </p> <p>Before a new family moves in to my neighborhood we often know what they do for a living, number of kids, pets, and sometimes race/ nationality. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736178 Mon, 15 May 2017 14:35:27 +0000 skipra 2736178@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am just surprised so many people know so much about neighbors that haven't even moved in yet! We lived in a 4 unit condo and when our closest neighbor sold a new family with a baby the same age as ours moved in. No one even knew they had a kid!<br /> It honestly doesn't surprise me people would point out that they are gay though. We are in the super liberal Boston area and I have heard plenty of comments regarding gay people that turn my stomach. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736091 Mon, 15 May 2017 12:15:54 +0000 Mrs D 2736091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: its just interesting bc it actually is a pretty diverse neighborhood. Perhaps the seller didnt know that - but the other two people did.</p> <p>@JennyPenny: thats true...I do so appreciate the neighbor who warned me of my other neighbors husband passing 2 weeks before we moved in so I didnt put my foot in my mouth. </p> <p>@Truth Bombs: in hind sight there a quite a few responses I wish I would have come back with...from what I have gathered from another neighbor she actually contemplated not selling to them - which appalls me.</p> <p>@muffinsmuffins: I agree...like I had said I was not surprised completely by the woman selling that she commented. It threw me though when my other neighbor who is gay also mentioned it straight away...almost like a warning...but she also told me they are very social wine drinkers - so kudos to her for providing valuable information! :)</p> <p>Glad you've had a good experience. I know this couple will too...its actually a very diverse neighborhood - I'm just thrilled to have another young family moving in! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736085 Mon, 15 May 2017 12:12:42 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2736085@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In terms of describing the new family, I think its normal to talk about their family structure. We just sold our house and have been telling our neighbors that a family with a young boy and girl will be moving in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736079 Mon, 15 May 2017 12:06:33 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2736079@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ha I agree it is weird to ask if you're ok with that but maybe it was just a heads up like someone mentioned. Probably this person isn't around gay people so has focused on it as 'different' and is even maybe confused how others may perceive it or how she feels about it.</p> <p>We are, to my knowledge, the only 2 mom family in our neighbourhood of older people. I was actually a little nervous about people being weird to us or our son when we moved last year. However, our neighbours have been absolutely wonderful and welcoming to us and have never said anything to our faces that was offensive or inappropriate. I'm sure it may be a bit confusing to the older generation but everyone has been great. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736050 Mon, 15 May 2017 11:34:40 +0000 Truth Bombs 2736050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think in that situation I would have said "why would it bother me?' Put the onus back on her to try to explain why in the world a neighbor's sexual preference should bother anyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736048 Mon, 15 May 2017 11:33:50 +0000 JennyPenny 2736048@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To me the question of "they're gay - are you okay with that?" is a little weird, but just pointing it out isn't. I'd interpret that more as a heads up so I don't accidentally do something dumb like "what's your husband do?" or something like that. When we moved into our current house one neighbor gave us a little overview of the neighbors (who had lost a child to SIDS, whose kids *still* hadn't moved out, etc.) I appreciated knowing what might be a sensitive subject so I would't put my foot in my mouth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736045 Mon, 15 May 2017 11:26:08 +0000 ShootingStar 2736045@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like where you are located these people are not coming into contact with many gay couples. It's like if you live in a mostly white town and some slightly racist neighbors might comment, "Hey, we have new neighbors that are a black family." Diversity is different to them and therefore something to comment on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/same-sex-couple-question#post-2736032 Mon, 15 May 2017 11:09:19 +0000 Mrs D 2736032@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So - I've had something interesting (well I find it interesting) happen this past weekend and I guess I am just wondering if I'm weird for thinking its weird or if this is the norm...</p> <p>My neighbor across the street just listed her house - I saw her this weekend and inquired how it was going...she announced she had sold it. Great! (that fast likely means a good price!) I asked about the buyers and she said a young family - which of course was great news. She then said - "you know, I hope it doesnt bother anyone but they are a lesbian couple"...now I wasnt particularly shocked to hear this from her (mid 50's extremely catholic woman)...I smiled (unsure how to really react to such a statement...not the actual piece of information)...she followed with "are you comfortable with that?"...it caught me off guard but I informed her that 1) it was none of my business who she sold her house to 2) it was none of my business peoples sexual preferences...and 3) since she brought it up I thought the diversity was great!</p> <p>I left the conversation assuming the whole weirdness of her feeling she needs to announce that they are gay was due to her own uber religious beliefs. Then...twice more this weekend I had neighbors nearly in the same breathe they tell me my neighbors house sold they tell me the sexual orientation of the couple...and one of those people is gay herself. Is this normal? I have several gay friends...the only one who ever felt the need to announce anything was a co-worker who kept his personal life very private at work...he informed me as we were crossing that bridge from "work friends" to "friends"...</p> <p>Its such an awkward statement to me...all I really want to know is if they are nice people who will come sit around my firepit with me and drink...but instead people are announcing their sexual preference to me? Cant we just say "they are a nice young couple with little kids?"... </p>