https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 28 Apr 2026 00:59:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise/page/2#post-403490 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 21:46:59 +0000 mrsmenow 403490@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think there is any right or wrong answer here. If your gut is telling you that you think it would be best for DS to have it done and your DH agrees then I would do it now as opposed to waiting until he is any older. If #3 is a boy we will circumcise, and it is pretty much the norm in our area.</p> <p>In nursing school I saw quit afew circumcisions and besides the numbing part of it, the babies weren't bothered by it. </p> <p>Good luck, I hope regardless of what you decide you and DH will find peace with your decision. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403470 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 21:27:07 +0000 Mrs. Oyster 403470@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was against having LO circumcised before we had him, but DH was very for it. I asked him to give me some reasons that he felt it needed to be done, other than "so he'll look like me," or "because that's just how my family has always done it." After doing his research and finding no medically necessary reason to have it done - we were able to come to a decision not to circumcise him, but to allow him to revisit the issue in the future if he feels the need.<br /> I have a cousin who actually got circumcised in his 20's because he was having issues, so I'm aware that this can happen - but it wasn't enough of a reason for me to remove a part of my son's body.<br /> Although I don't know yet how I'll teach him to clean it (mostly because I don't have a penis) - I'm sure it will be similar to a great number of other things I don't yet know how to teach him....I'll learn and so will he :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403459 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 21:02:41 +0000 dookie32 403459@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@prettylizy: Oh I agree it was way more common before- I was just saying that the percentage is probably decreasing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403442 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 20:35:58 +0000 sarac 403442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: Well, there you go. That was my single reason to support not religious circumcision. Gone! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403423 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 20:17:37 +0000 Arden 403423@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sarac: That study (about circumcision reducing chance of spreading AIDS) has since been proven wrong - it was carried out in a very unscientific way and the results were very skewed. </p> <p><a href="http://blog.practicalethics.ox.ac.uk/2012/05/when-bad-science-kills-or-how-to-spread-aids/" rel="nofollow">http://blog.practicalethics.ox.ac.uk/2012/05/when-bad-science-kills-or-how-to-spread-aids/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403374 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 19:28:25 +0000 sarac 403374@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@FutureMrsMcK: If what you're looking for is reassurance that future sexual partners won't be horrified, I can provide that. I've experienced both sorts, and I've never minded either. I'm personally very opposed to non-religious circumcision, and I got lucky finding a husband who feels the same.</p> <p>And as a note, there are men who wish that they had not been circumcised. I always see talk of men who grew up wishing they had been as a reason to do it, but there are men who've had it and wish they hadn't. I read up on some of their perspectives when I was thinking about it. While in college, I read a paper in a parasitology course about the protective nature of circumcision against HIV transmission, which is very real. It was enough to make me reconsider my stance, but I ultimately decided that it wasn't my choice to make, and that any sons I had could make the choice to do it as adults, if they wished. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403358 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 19:15:53 +0000 prettylizy 403358@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dookie32: 35 years ago it was much more common to circ than it is now.</p> <p>My $0.02 - we easily teach our daughters to keep their lady bits clean without need to cut any skin off so it's 'easier' so I don't see the point of cutting off boy parts. </p> <p>Skip to 5:30 of this video, Craig Ferguson says it best imo! lol!</p> <p><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ojnlhWq1kc&#038;feature=youtube_gdata_player" rel="nofollow">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ojnlhWq1kc&#038;feature=youtube_gdata_player</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403327 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 18:56:11 +0000 dookie32 403327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: My husband is 35 and still remembers the one dude on their football team that wasn't circumcised so I'd disagree with that :). I think men check out other dudes more than they would like to admit to. It's juvenile but human nature. I do think it's going to be much more common to see uncut men when our kids are teenagers though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403313 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 18:39:27 +0000 littlek 403313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Off topic but there is a sex and the city episode about this guy who decides to get a circumcision as an adult. I think Charlotte was dating him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403312 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 18:38:40 +0000 littlek 403312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We got our LO circumcised and if was no issue, it took a week of so to heal but he was in no pain. We got it done when he was 10 days old because they wouldn't do the surgery until he was released from the NICU </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403254 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 17:44:43 +0000 chopsuey 403254@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Dh was adopted and didn't get circumcised when he was an infant. Once he came to America the inlaws had him circumcised. He was around 1. And my mil says the boys were fine </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403253 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 17:42:39 +0000 Sweet T 403253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had DS circumcised and don't regret it at all. He didn't cry and it healed quickly. It's the norm to circumcise where we're from so it wasn't really a question for us. I do agree with everyone who said to do it sooner rather than later! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403167 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:28:32 +0000 Honeybee 403167@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Fwiw, we also didn't have strong feelings on circumsion, so we decided to just do it. I watched the whole procedure and it was really no big deal. DS slept through the whole thing and was completely healed within a few days. I don't reget our choice at all, and we'll definitely have future boys circ'ed too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403158 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:23:50 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 403158@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it will be too hard to teach him to keep his penis clean. DH isn't circumcised &amp; I've seen him soap up in the shower; it's no big deal. He said his parents taught him how to wash. He said he was lazy once or twice as a kid &amp; it felt uncomfortable (no infection or anything) so he made sure to do it right.</p> <p>We didn't circ DS, but I think if you are changing your minds you should talk to your pediatrician &amp; decide quickly. It seems like it'd be more traumatizing as he gets older than to do it when he won't remember. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403147 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:19:23 +0000 lovehoneybee 403147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@littlebug: Yeah, the locker room concern thing isn't really a concern for me, because my DH said the same thing. DS does, however, have 4 boy cousins that he'll likely take baths with at some point...so there is the potential for weirdness from or to them there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403141 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:17:36 +0000 littlebug 403141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hubs and I are currently trying to make a decision about circumcision for our January baby. We are leaning towards not circumcising. I mentioned the whole locker room thing to Hubs and he was not really concerned about it, since "It's not like we actually stand around the locker room and check each other's junk out! We pretty much avoid looking at each other!" I do have the same concerns about cleaning it, but I think we can handle it and I'm sure that it'll just come second nature to baby since we'll be doing it since birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403123 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:08:04 +0000 lovehoneybee 403123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: Circumcision is definitely the norm here as well. We were asked three different times in the hospital if we were sure we didn't want it donem and when they were gathering all the baby boys up to have it done at the same time they still came by to try to get E...it was just so unusual for anyone to decline it there. </p> <p>I swear I'm not crazy, and it's more than just the cleaning part, but I haven't managed to articulate it to myself or DH yet, let alone here. I think I'm partly just worried because I have very little experience with uncut penises, and none of that experience was while sober. </p> <p>I think we'll talk about it some more, find out if his insurance will even cover it at this point, and talk to his pedi at our next visit. </p> <p>Thanks for the feedback everyone! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403113 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 16:04:55 +0000 hilsy85 403113@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As others have said, it seems like caring for an uncirc'd part isn't that different from caring for a circ'd one. either way, good hygiene is important! I wouldn't have it done just because you're now worried about infection, etc--as long as he's bathing regularly, I can't imagine it being an issue. </p> <p>Also, regarding the AAP, their stance didn't really change...they still do not recommend routine circumcision, as there's not medical evidence that having it done is better than not having it done. Their new statement was most likely formulated so it is easier to have circumcision covered by insurance, rather than people having to pay out of pocket. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403094 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:52:38 +0000 photojane 403094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i just wanted to add that not circumcising is not trendy everywhere. where i live circumcising is very much the norm, and i don't foresee that changing anytime soon. i work on three different hospitals' postpartum floors, and have only seen maybe 1 or 2 baby boys not get circ'd in the past 6 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403092 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:51:18 +0000 KT326 403092@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>His penis isn't going to fall off! We had our son circumcised since my husband is. But my nephew is not. He is special needs and while he did have some issues when he was around 6-7 years old it wasn't anything big. He was just learning to bathe on his own and wasn't cleaning properly. He needed some cream to clear things up. It took a little bit but he finally learned how to clean that area on his own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403089 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:50:09 +0000 Pink Champagne 403089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you do decide to have your son circumcised, I do not think you need to worry about it hurting him. We circumcised for religious reasons, and my LO didn't even cry during the procedure. He was healed up within a week.</p> <p>From my understanding, the process is much more traumatizing if you were to wait until your son is older (ie, when he could remember the experience). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403080 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:41:54 +0000 purrpletulips 403080@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We decided to have DS circ but DH started having second thoughts after he was born. He talked with my OB about having it done now vs when DS was older and my OB advised to get it done now because it is much more complicated when they get older (like 5y) and it would require DS to be put under anesthesia at that age. My OB also said DS won't remember it because he is so young. I'd suggest doing it sooner than later if you are wanting to have it done. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403076 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:36:17 +0000 Chastenet 403076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@FutureMrsMcK: Lol :) I mentioned this to DH and he said "what so if he's circumcised he won't need to use soap?"...Basically he'll have to clean his penis no matter what, a little extra skin doesn't change the process that much! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403075 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:36:14 +0000 Mrsbells 403075@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We will definitely circumcise if we have boy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403066 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:31:38 +0000 Arden 403066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Maysprout: Agreed - most of the world doesn't circumcise and in many places the hygienic conditions are worse than America, and they are doing fine. Here in the USA where we have constant access to running water and soap, it seems completely unnecessary. </p> <p>In my thinking it's like "Hmm, wash it vs cut it off... how is that a question?" Not trying to offend, I just don't understand the reasoning personally. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403057 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:25:19 +0000 T-Mom 403057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We opted not to circumcise since my DH felt strongly not to. Sometimes I do worry when people talk about locker room stigmas and all, but I hope that because many more kids are not having it done these days, that he won't be in a total minority. My pediatrician did mention pushing it back to clean but she didn't make a big deal out of it and I do'nt anticipate it really being a problem. I figure, this is how their bodes are au naturel.. surely God must have designed it so you're not going to have adverse affects for leaving it that way??? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403051 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:23:39 +0000 mrbee 403051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We didn't circumcise and it's been really easy to keep clean (just soap and water in the tub). When he turns older, then it will be easy to teach him how to keep it clean himself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403050 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:22:37 +0000 Maysprout 403050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The majority of Euorpe and I think Canada isn't circumcised and I haven't heard of any penis falling off epidemic ;) . </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403046 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:16:04 +0000 glimmersnaps 403046@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know if this would be a factor in your decision, but my friend looked into circumcision for her son who was a few months old. And they said that if you do it after they are approximately 10 lbs the procedure has to be done in an OR under GA and would be quite costly. Not sure if this is the case in all places but that's what she was told.</p> <p>As far as waiting until they remember... my BIL who grew up in India says he remembers his, which was done at like 4. He said it hurt but he's not like traumatized. He also got a big party, so that probably helped. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/second-guessing-decision-not-to-circumcise#post-403044 Fri, 16 Nov 2012 15:14:33 +0000 DillonLion 403044@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are still struggling with the decision, it may not hurt to re-address the situation. Each of us have our own ideas about whether or not to circumcise, but you have to figure out what the right decision is for your family and your son specifically. Maybe you and DH can have another in-depth discussion about it and you can consult your pediatrician for his medical opinion. Then you can decide from there. </p> <p>The only opinion that I'm going to offer is that I think you guys should come to a decision sometime in the near future as opposed to when he is much older, in case you decide to move forward with the surgery. Having to undergo surgery of this nature when you are much older is a lot more traumatizing to the individual I feel. Plus, there are all of the emotional aspects of not being circumcised, wanting to be, and then having to go through surgery to change it. Doing it now kind of circumvents a bit of that and your baby only has to deal with the physical aspects as opposed to physical and emotional. (But, again, this decision is so personal and I know you guys will come to find the right one for your family) Best of luck! </p>