https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 03 Apr 2026 22:46:17 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714552 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 18:18:09 +0000 skipra 2714552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would start with getting your LO used to going to bed in his own room first and see how that goes. We co slept with our 2 older kids. My oldest was only 20 months when his brother was born and he was still coming in our room every night. We had our second sleep in a cradle next to the bed. LO1 started to get annoyed about the baby waking him up so he slept longer and longer stretches in his room and once he was fully transitioned from crib to bed, he slept all night in his room. There were some nights once he was mostly staying in his room that he woulda wake and DH would get in bed with him. LO2 started sttn in his crib on his own some night starting around 2. He struggled with the transition to a bed and often one of us has to go in - sometimes just to cover him with blankets and sometimes to sleep but he is fine with not coming into our bed anymore. My advice is not to push too hard. Start with bedtime and then see if you can get him back to sleep motn once bedtime is established, just making the cosleep g portion of the night later and later until he is ok without it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714509 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 16:23:03 +0000 PixieStix 2714509@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Nutella: My son just turned 3 this month, on the 14th. And our baby is due July 22nd. </p> <p>Good luck to you too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714465 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 15:00:59 +0000 Nutella 2714465@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: baby is due in July! So only a few months to sort out our permanent bedstay guest we seem to have acquired. He's 3yo too by the way.<br /> I will say, once he's asleep, nothing seems to wake him so I guess that's potentially a positive for you too?! I just hear all the time it's a phase...so just riding it out for now. Good luck!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714268 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 11:33:39 +0000 PixieStix 2714268@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Woolly Mammoth: Thanks for info with your DH doing a transition from in the bed, to in a chair, etc. I think we just might use that!</p> <p>@Nutella: I'm worried about all of us in one room, too. Not so much if it actually works, but because I foresee a crying 3 year old all upset over baby sister crying in the night. I'm sure we can agree that a tired mama and daddy don't need the extra fight with a young kiddo while also tending to a babies needs in the middle of the night! But if it all works out with all of us colseeping together then so be it. Doubt I'll be fighting much once LO #2 comes.</p> <p>BTW when is your baby due? :) </p> <p>@Pumuckl: Oh my! That is a full bed! No judgement here, of course. But I'm just amazed that the older ones are fine with the babies. This too gives me hope. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714068 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 04:53:30 +0000 Pumuckl 2714068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: so we had the best intentions of keeping our nearly 4 year old bed bug out of our bed once the twins arrived. We lasted a whopping 2 nights. We are just too tired to get him back to bed and often he is quite the ninja nowadays and we don't even hear him entering our room. The twins don't cosleep completely either so we have ended up with all four kids plus us in our bed for a couple of hours :silly: not great but it works. The older two have to stay on the outside side of the bed on DH side and the babies get the middle. That works pretty well. So just to give you another perspective.<br /> Oh and 9 out of 10 times the older kids don't hear the younger siblings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714067 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 03:27:39 +0000 Nutella 2714067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Feel your pain! Our LO has decided he needs to suddenly sleep with us since he's afraid of (insert fear of the night) &amp; needs us to either sleep with him or come to our bed. Sometimes DH will camp out in his bed, I struggle to do this because of second tri belly/backache ... but this will still end up with him in our bed if he wakes up immediately after DH leaves OR around 4am. I don't mind the 4am running into our bed, it's just the actual going to bed part that's so long and time consuming! DH and I have no evening time together as it is, since we both seem to put ourselves to sleep rather than our son 🤔😬 </p> <p>Does anyone know how long this phase lasts? I'm foreseeing us and the new born baby all in the same room come July! Which is fine but sounds tiring! </p> <p>LO was a very easy infant and never showed any separation anxiety sleeping in his cot away from us, but I guess now the imagination is going on overdrive he is finding it hard to shut down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2714060 Wed, 22 Mar 2017 01:55:07 +0000 Woolly Mammoth 2714060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We moved LO to his own room a few months before his third birthday. He had been sleeping in our bed since he was 3-4 months old.</p> <p>We set up a twin bed in his room and just started doing the bedtime routine there instead of in our bed. DH got in bed with him at first, then transitioned to reading to him from a chair. It really went a lot more smoothly than we expected. He got used to it within a few days.</p> <p>He's 3 1/2 now and has recently started coming to our bed every night in the middle of the night. We haven't tried to put a stop to it yet, but I'm 36 weeks pregnant, so we'll probably have to do something about it soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713505 Tue, 21 Mar 2017 08:18:15 +0000 snowjewelz 2713505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: Yeaaah... We don't have it all figured out yet; that's why DH is with her in her room. My dream honestly is just to sleep with all of them too! But we don't have extra money to totally re-do our room and do a family bed. I plan to side car crib to our bed soon for baby, so later if DD1 wakes up and wants to come in with us, we will have room for her but I do want her to always start the night in her own bed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713405 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 21:04:34 +0000 PixieStix 2713405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Toad: @JoyfulKiwi: well you both give me hope that my kiddo might just not be as affected by baby wake ups. I think we're leaning towards getting him to his own room but keeping the toddler bed in our room in case he gets scared. Now, if only my mind would stop worrying me with all these scenarios. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713372 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 20:13:45 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 2713372@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: our daughter was colicky for the first 8 weeks or so and cried a lot at night. We'd end up taking her into the nursery to rock if she couldn't settle down which lessened the noise. Sometimes her crying would wake our older son (even if he was in his own room), but he'd go back to sleep quickly if my husband soothed him a bit (he was awake anyway from the baby crying). After she moved out of her crying-so-loudly-for-forever phase, our son rarely woke up because of her. I think co-sleeping keeps her pretty quiet, because I can soothe/nurse her before she gets riled up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713351 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 19:53:49 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2713351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know anything about moving a toddler to their own bed; we never coslept. However, my 2 year old DS and 2 month old DD share a room. He has only been awakened at the early morning crying when she wakes for the day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713315 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 19:04:13 +0000 PixieStix 2713315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@snowjewelz: I like this idea best, of getting him directly in to his room. Mostly, because I could see him possibly getting upset if he was in our room (be it in our bed or on a toddler bed beside us) and the baby started crying and woke him up. I don't think he'd be very happy, or anyone for that matter.</p> <p>However I also see the points others have made like @JoyfulKiwi saying that basically the 'whole family' sleeps in the same room except the child. That could be confusing, especially after baby comes... I wonder if he would be upset knowing we're all in one room and get jealous? </p> <p>@JoyfulKiwi: How did your kiddo adapt to having the baby in the room? Any consistent interruptions for them, or did they sleep through most of the baby wake ups? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713290 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 18:03:10 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 2713290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were in the same boat when I was pregnant. Our son already started the night in his own room, but came to our bed whenever he woke up (usually between 1-3am). But when my belly got bigger, we needed him out totally. My husband would go into his room and co-sleep with him on the twin bed, but he didn't get much rest. Plus, I had to look at it from my son's point of view: literally EVERYONE in our family sleeps in our room. Us, the baby, even the dog's bed is by our dresser. It seemed incredibly unfair to shut him out. So we made him a little nook between our bed and the wall. It's couch-cushions covered in a fitted sheet with a pillow and blanket. We taught him to come in quietly if he wants to at night &amp; cover himself up. We celebrate heavily nights he stays in his own room (not many :silly: ) We actually love this arrangement!<br /> I think you could probably just get him to be comfortable doing bedtime in his own room first and your husband should take the lead on this. You don't want your pregnant self sleeping on an air mattress! Decide what you want with your husband and how it will look and then tell your kiddo what will change. I'd suggest telling him a change is coming, but don't start for several days. This will give you all time to talk about it and prepare for the new routine. Then just stick with it and validate his feelings (since he'll likely not be jazzed about it) and support him as best you can while he learns this new skills. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713163 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 14:14:27 +0000 bubblegum 2713163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ohhh great post!!! I have an almost 3 year old and baby number 2 is due next month. We re-did his big boy room in hopes he would want to sleep in there but nope!! The moment we start the bed time routine in his room he loses it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713134 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 13:49:36 +0000 gingerbebe 2713134@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I mean if you're okay with cosleeping, either sidecar a crib to your bed for the baby or sidecar a twin mattress to your bed to have your toddler sleep there next to you. You can make sort of a barrier with a pool noodle or a Snoogle to keep toddler away or you can have DH and toddler share the big bed and you and baby share the attached twin with a parent in between the kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2713123 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 13:43:13 +0000 MrsSRS 2713123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on your LO'S temperament. Our oldest child would do well with getting some books about big kid beds from the library, talking about it for a week, using an ok to wake clock, and then just doing it cold turkey. Our youngest would probably need a door monkey and a more gradual transition. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712829 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 09:10:31 +0000 honeybear 2712829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: If the goal is only to make space for the baby and there's no rush to get him into his own room, then you could let the older sibling sleep in the same room, but not the same bed, if there is space for another mattress. Maybe your husband could sleep with him for a while in the other bed at first so he's not alone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712825 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 09:03:02 +0000 wrkbrk 2712825@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: No advice for a 3 year old because our LO was 15 months when we moved him to his own room BUT I just wanted to share that it was a muuuuuuuuuuuch bigger deal to me than it was to him. I fretted and worried and read books and delayed. When we finally bit the bullet one night I was bracing for the worst, and he was literally like, peace out mom! He loves his own crib and his own room and for the first time ever, puts himself to sleep. So keep this in mind and good luck!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712823 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 09:02:37 +0000 snowjewelz 2712823@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do it now, go straight to the room and have DH stay there if needed for a while. </p> <p>I have two girls exactly 2 years apart. Bed shared with DD1 literally till the night before I gave birth (part laziness, partly didn't want to move her b/c I loved having her next to me). </p> <p>So DD2 is 3 months and DH still sleeps with DD1 in her room. She fought bed time like a month and then settled down. But when we ask if she's ready to stay there by herself she said she's not. Plus, DD2 still wakes up at least twice a night, so DH actually gets better sleep there so we're letting it be for now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712810 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 08:52:49 +0000 PixieStix 2712810@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: Right? lol I'm not worried about it in terms of how old he is or anything, but purely because of the new baby. I definitely don't want extra problems at bed time and with sleep if I have 2 kiddos waking up a lot! That sounds rough.</p> <p>At first, DH and I thought trying to train him on the toddler bed in our room was our best start, but then I thought, what if he gets stuck there and then gets all upset when baby comes?</p> <p>Then again I can see issues with trying to get him to go completely in the other room by himself in the twin bed there, but I figured I could at least sleep on a blow up mattress next to him for the first week or two and then edge out? Still planning this, of course.</p> <p>We want to get started next Friday night and stick to our plan. I'm with you on the point of getting this done before baby comes. Which, is why I figured 4 months should be enough to get something done, even with hiccups.</p> <p>Now I just need to do some bedding shopping with N. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712782 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 08:08:55 +0000 yoursilverlining 2712782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just wanted to say you are not alone – we are currently working (mostly successfully!) with getting our 4.5 year old into her own bed. </p> <p>What worked for us (because we did half-heartedly try and fail a few times haha) was to let LO pick out her own bed. She picked it and I assembled it Christmas Eve for a Christmas morning surprise. I think/hope that picking out her own bed and sheet set helped her buy into the idea and also gives me a good reasoning tool (“you should try to sleep in your bed tonight LO. Remember, you picked it out because you liked it so much. . . “) something like that. </p> <p>Her twin bed is in our bedroom. I don’t know when we will move her to her own room. She mostly sleeps in her bed now, although she almost always comes into bed with me around 4am. She also still asks to sleep with me almost every night and sometimes I let her as a treat, or if she is sick. </p> <p>I figure I don’t know any teenagers still wanting to sleep with mama, so we’ll get there lol</p> <p>ETA: The only thing I would add is that where you plan to cosleep with the new baby, I would definitely try to get your LO1 into their own bed as much in advance of the birth as you can, so that your LO doesn't see it as you "picking the new baby over them" to sleep with. We only have one LO so didn't have that issue, but I can see that being a push to get LO into their own bed. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712771 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 07:34:34 +0000 PixieStix 2712771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Orchid: You give me hope. Thank you. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712765 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 07:23:20 +0000 Orchid 2712765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: maybe 2 months? I think it'd go faster since your LO is older </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712757 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 07:07:55 +0000 PixieStix 2712757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Orchid: No laughing here! I'm just not sure how much time I've got to transition him, or even a realistic amount of time to guess. How long did it take your LO with that method? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712743 Mon, 20 Mar 2017 05:55:31 +0000 Orchid 2712743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had this issue and it's been tough. It's great that you are starting early! We tackled it in stages. We got our LO a floor bed (queen), then we coslept with him in his room. Then we put our queen mattress in the same room and got him used to sleeping by himself on his mattress with us on our own mattress in the same room. Then we moved our mattress out and just sat at the door till he fell asleep. Then sat outside the door. </p> <p>Most people might laugh at this elaborate process!!! My husband rolled his eyes a few times but it was gentle and mostly tear free! </p> <p>Good luck!</p> <p>We did this at 2 years old so likely a 3 year old wouldn't need all this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712713 Sun, 19 Mar 2017 20:48:03 +0000 PixieStix 2712713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Boopers: Thanks for relating with me. It's always nice to feel like you aren't alone. Especially when it comes to dealing with a big change like this. Good luck for both of us!</p> <p>@caterw: I was planning on something like that, with the bedding and such, but knowing my son I can totally see him having a fit at bedtime anyways but I guess we will just have to stick by our guns.. when we figure out what we're doing. Haha </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712708 Sun, 19 Mar 2017 20:30:34 +0000 Boopers 2712708@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@caterw: I love the idea of the nest area! I'm going to remember this for the times we need it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712706 Sun, 19 Mar 2017 20:27:40 +0000 caterw 2712706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No experience with constant cosleeping at 3, but we definitely had a bedbug that didn't want to stop crawling in with Mommy and Daddy in the middle of the night.... We had to get her to stop when I was pregnant also since I knew I would end up cosleeping again with baby.</p> <p>What about letting him pick out some special stuff for a new big boy room? Sheets, bedding, nightlight, and a lovey to keep him safe. DD was a lot more interested in her own bed when she got to decorate it. I also went into her room and cuddled her in her own bed when I was trying to break her of the habit of being in ours. For a last resort, she has a little "nest" area behind our bed that she can bring her sleeping bag and stay in our room if she is super scared or lonely. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712704 Sun, 19 Mar 2017 20:23:34 +0000 Boopers 2712704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are in a similar situation although my cosleeping LO is almost 2. I am due in September and would really like LO in his own bed, in his own room before then.</p> <p>Bedtime has been a nightmare lately. He gets really hyper and worked up in bed with us and starts hitting and kicking. My husband was so frustrated on Friday night that he picked him up, put him in the toddler bed that's by my side of the bed and laid back down. My LO didn't get up and fell asleep on his own. I was shocked! He did wake up a few times at night and asked for back pats, but went down each time easily. I was dreading the fight and struggle of getting him out of our bed and so far we are 3 nights in of him laying down on his bed and falling asleep on his own.</p> <p>I do think that him having a similar routine at daycare has helped us a lot. We tried getting him to sleep in the same toddler bed in the same spot by my side of the bed a few months ago but he would cry and crawl back into bed with us. I don't think he was ready at all a few months ago.</p> <p>As far as transitioning him out of our room, I plan to do that this summer when I'm off for the summer and can devote the time to trek back and forth between rooms as needed. I'm hoping that the transition to his own bed in our room before transitioning to his own room helps!</p> <p>Good luck!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/seeking-advice-for-going-from-cosleeping-to-not-at-age-3#post-2712703 Sun, 19 Mar 2017 20:08:41 +0000 PixieStix 2712703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well we are not sure where to start, but basically after a c-section, breastfeeding problems and sleep problems, we have a 3 year old who sleeps in our bed. I generally don't mind it now that he sleeps better. The issue is that we have baby number 2 due in late July. </p> <p>Anyone been in this kinda situation? Should we start with training him to sleep in a toddler bed in our room first? Or go straight to moving him to his room? I know I want to cosleep the next one. I just have one idea how to go about this. Any help welcome! </p>