https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 13 May 2026 12:20:41 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733391 Mon, 22 Apr 2013 05:50:53 +0000 ladybee 733391@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: just try to hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733381 Mon, 22 Apr 2013 05:20:05 +0000 lomom 733381@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ladybee: very very good advice. I know I'm guilty of saying things without thinking of what others may be going through. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733378 Mon, 22 Apr 2013 05:14:25 +0000 SugarplumsMom 733378@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: she asked you 3 times how it feels?! Wtf is wrong with her? Since she's so persistent, I would just go ahead and tell her exactly how you feel! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733375 Mon, 22 Apr 2013 04:54:39 +0000 Pink Champagne 733375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am sure she didn't mean to hurt you. You are already going through so much- try to not look for additional reasons to be upset. Don't forget, even though she's family, she has her life to lead too despite what's going on with your LO. I hope you get to take your LO home soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733330 Mon, 22 Apr 2013 00:47:29 +0000 googly-eyes 733330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Given her other comments I wonder if she is where I was in the early, baby crying 5+ hours/day, minimal sleep, ppd days.. I actually sort of envied those with SHORT nicu stays... by which I mean people who got some rest in between pregnancy and labor and the very long newborn days. (This is partially from what I heard 2nd time nicu parents say so please don't hate me!) Plus, help learning how to do things from the nicu nurses, and "practice" before doing it 24/7 on your own. From a place of sanity I can now look back and think "but I would never want DD to be in the hospital!!"... But back then I was absolutely exhausted (and I was pumping because bf'ing wasn't working out, so I got the joys of the pump too.) </p> <p> I guess all I'm saying is she is probably coming from a very different place than you right now, but that doesn't necessarily make her complaint invalid... she's probably just ignorant and maybe so sleep deprived she's forgotten that she has a healthy LO at home and she's totally not thinking about all the worry and stress you're going through. One day she may snap out of it and really regret saying anything like that to you or posting anything like that you could see...</p> <p>I hope you have your LO at home soon..hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733276 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 22:04:56 +0000 autumnlove 733276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry that your feelings are hurt. I hope your son can go home soon. Thinking of you!</p> <p>@ladybee: Great advice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733191 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 20:22:15 +0000 ladybee 733191@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sure it still hurts. After our mc I hated everyone who would complain about being pregnant or their lo but I never said anything because I knew how irrational I was being. Try to remember that other people have been through things and you wouldn't be aware that your comment has hurt them. That's what I always did. Now I make a real effort to be conscience of others. But at the same time, I have the right to feel how I feel during any given time in my life and if I want to complain I can. I know it's hard, try to just focus on you and your family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733179 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 20:18:34 +0000 pui 733179@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( I'm sure she doesn't mean to be insensitive to you.</p> <p>No one recognizes how fortunate they are. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-733176 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 20:17:40 +0000 lomom 733176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know it's irrational and comes from a place of heartache and hormones but it still felt like a punch in the face. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732471 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 07:53:48 +0000 heffalump 732471@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I understand where you're coming from and that it hurts you, but I don't think that she meant any harm by it. I know after I miscarried it was hard for me to see people complain about their lives with their babies because I just wanted a baby. But now I admit to complaining myself. Those sleepless nights are hard, but of course worth it. </p> <p>Hope you'll be home with your LO soon so you can snuggle all night! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732455 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 07:21:49 +0000 Ree723 732455@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I sincerely doubt the comment was meant to hurt you, I'd be willing to bet she wasn't even thinking about your situation when she posted that, but if you want to help her keep things in perspective, you could write something like "what I wouldn't give to be up four times during the night with my LO if it meant we could be at home instead of the NICU". Nothing snarky as I don't think she was trying to be mean,but sometimes putting things in perspective can go a long way.</p> <p>I'm sorry, I can't imagine what you're going through, but I just wanted to put it out there that this comment was probably just an offhand remark, coming from a place of sleep deprivation, and not meant to cause you pain, even though it inadvertently did just that. Hang in there, things will get better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732451 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 07:11:17 +0000 littlek 732451@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: Wow... people can be so insensitive... i was talking to DH about this last night and no one gets what you are going through (or what other parents went through who had a baby in the NICU) and what an emotional time it is... I'm so sorry, I know its rough right now.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732438 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 06:56:45 +0000 Dandelion 732438@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I would comment on her post and say exactly that..."at least you're snuggling her baby and not listening to a pump!" and just make her feel like an ass.</p> <p>But, that's just me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732436 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 06:51:09 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 732436@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I get what you mean. When I hear other woman complain about their babies, pregnancies or morning sickness, I think to my self at least you have your baby, at least you get to experience pregnancy or morning sickness. We had an early MC in January. THEN I remember what @ladybee: said &amp; I know that at somepoint I will probably say the same thing because I am living my life in that moment. ((Hugs)) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732435 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 06:47:17 +0000 sea_bass 732435@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I am flabbergasted anyone would would say that to you. She sounds unhinged. Has the world gone mad..?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732426 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 06:35:41 +0000 iheartleopardprint 732426@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She wouldn't have been saying it to intentionally cause harm, she wouldn't even have had a second thought. I don't want to sound harsh at all, but I know it's like your entire universe has stopped but everyone else's does continue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732412 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 05:53:19 +0000 ladybee 732412@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: just try to remember most people are just living their own lives and aren't trying to hurt you even though it does. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732409 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 05:28:14 +0000 lomom 732409@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks. It just stings. She has also asked me at least three times how it feels to be at home without LO. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732403 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 04:58:44 +0000 sea_bass 732403@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: She sounds VERY insensitive. Try not to think about it. Your doing everything right and your not the type to be so self centred and insensitive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732396 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 04:28:39 +0000 Smurfette 732396@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs! That has to be annoying. I hate seeing posts about parents complaining about their kids. I understand if they need to vent but at the same time, what about the situation of the person reading it. Like yours or someone who can't get pregnant...... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sil-complaining-about-her-lo#post-732393 Sun, 21 Apr 2013 04:22:34 +0000 lomom 732393@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>SIL just posted on Facebook how annoyed she is because she's up yet again with her LO. </p> <p>She knows our situation with LO being in NICU and the post feels like such a punch in the face. I wanted to comment and tell her to shut the f*** up and be glad that when she's up for the fourth time in one night, at least she's snuggling her baby and not listening to a pump. </p> <p>Ugh. </p>