https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 20:59:15 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2267124 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 13:08:31 +0000 Raindrop 2267124@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is a tough question because everyone values weddings differently.</p> <p>I voted for you to skip and just enjoy yourself because I feel like that would be best for you.</p> <p>In my circle / culture, it's very common to not be invited to the ceremony and be only invited to the reception. So I always thought being invited to the ceremony was a big deal, so when I do get invited to ceremony part, I go because I guess I feel honored that they consider me close enough to be part of that.</p> <p>Recently I was invited to a co-worker's ceremony and not invited to his reception which really rubbed me the wrong way and so I declined the invite. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266975 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:27:13 +0000 Bubbles 2266975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not at all religious but I do think it would be rude to skip the ceremony, but then still attend the reception and enjoy the couples hospitality. If it was my wedding I would be annoyed. But if it definitely won't be noticed then I think you should just do what you are comfortable with! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266972 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:24:47 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2266972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If at all possible, I always try to make the ceremony. I totally understand when there are circumstances that prevent people from doing so, bu if it's just because you don't want to sit through a long ceremony, I sort of think that's rude. Witnessing the marriage is the whole point of the party afterwards. </p> <p>Again, if work, or other plans prevent you from going, that's one thing. We're going to a wedding in a few weeks, but it's the same day that we're coming back from vacation. The ceremony is at noon and the reception is at 5pm. There's just no way we'll be able to make it back from vacation in time to make the ceremony, so we're just attending the reception. I do feel pretty guilty about that though. I hate missing the ceremony. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266963 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 11:14:20 +0000 Mrs. Peanut 2266963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amelieisme: If you're going to the rehearsal dinner, that would make it even weirder to not go to the wedding, in my opinion. I would suck it up and go. It'll only be an hour or so then you can go back the hotel and relax until the reception. If you're at the rehearsal, it will probably be noticed if you aren't there for the wedding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266925 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 10:46:26 +0000 snowjewelz 2266925@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So many people have weighed in already, but it really depends! For my own wedding, I wouldn't care if someone's spouse that I don't really know didn't attend, but is at the reception. And if this was me, I'd go to the ceremony just to see DH as a groomsmen haha. But if it's just a lot of work/trouble, then I'd totally skip too. I don't think it's a huge deal if both parties don't know each other well. </p> <p>BUT, it seems that from the many posts written, people feel very different about these things and some people can be greatly offended. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266807 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:13:11 +0000 Amelieisme 2266807@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all for your responses! I've read them all and am still a bit torn. Since I will be going to the rehearsal dinner, I can take the opportunity to sort of feel things out and make a decision then. Its a pretty laid back bunch so I honestly think, even if it is known that I didn't go, no one would care. Just wanted to get a feel for what others would do. I have a feeling I'll end up going, but we'll see. Thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266802 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 09:07:35 +0000 HLK208 2266802@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to both just because my husband is apart of it and I would want to see him. I was also a little bit annoyed when people on came to our reception and not the ceremony. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266792 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:59:29 +0000 Ree723 2266792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmm, maybe I'm just rude but if I didn't know the bride and groom well, I wouldn't feel the slightest bit guilty about skipping the ceremony. Hell, you're really only there as your DH's date, not because having you present to witness their exchanging of the vows is important to the couple. It would be an entirely different matter if they were your friends too but they're not so therefore, I'd totally skip the ceremony.</p> <p>I always look at things from what is important to the bride and groom - with my wedding, a few unattached cousins brought a date that I had never met before and honestly, I couldn't have cared less whether or not they were at my ceremony. I don't know them, they aren't important to me, and therefore, why would I care whether or not they witnessed me exchanging my vows? Now if my cousins had skipped the ceremony, I would have been very upset (or in your case, your DH, although being part of the bridal party makes that point null and void, but you get my drift).... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony/page/2#post-2266786 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:52:34 +0000 TemperanceBrennan 2266786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've found that this is regional in my experience. In my hometown, it is considered very rude not to go to the ceremony and usually the ceremony has more people attend than the reception. But where I live now, it seems that the ceremony is seen as more of a close friend/family event and more casual acquaintances (co-workers, casual friends, etc) just go to the reception. </p> <p>In your situation, I would just go to the reception. I was in a very similar situation and I did go to the ceremony, but I didn't talk to one person there. DH was in the wedding and saw me, but I could have skipped easily and no one would have cared. In hindsight, I wish I had. The ceremony offended me and put me in a bad mood, but that's a different story :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266761 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:38:34 +0000 plantains 2266761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it is really rude to skip the ceremony but till attend the reception. The ceremony is the whole point if attending and I feel like of you plan on eating someone's food and drink at their reception the. You should be able to put yourself out for their ceremony. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266759 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:36:55 +0000 fancyfunction 2266759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I don't think it's rude not to go. I feel like most of the weddings I've attended ( including mine) the majority of guests were not at the ceremony but came to the reception - to each their own, and I'm Catholic. Sometimes it's not feasible to make it to the ceremony but then go to the reception. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266752 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:32:36 +0000 Bluebonnet 2266752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think its incredibly rude to skip the ceremony - especially since DH is in the wedding. DH and I met long after college and we've both been in weddings where the other person only knew the couple getting married and people in the wedding party. </p> <p>@Amelieisme: Since DH is a groomsman, I assume you are going to the rehearsal dinner. You will meet other spouses of wedding party members then. Its a good opportunity for you to get to know that circle of friends (and their spouses) a little bit more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266747 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:30:11 +0000 Alivoo01 2266747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In our culture, it's totally normal to skip the formalities of the wedding and just go grub so I'd say skip. Although, sometimes I feel like it's a bit rude, but it's a cultural thing so I turn the blind eye. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266734 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:19:56 +0000 LuLu Mom 2266734@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In this situation if you have no one else to sit with, do not know the family/couple personally I would skip the ceremony. Normally I think you should attend both unless special circumstance, but this...I think is a special circumstance. you don't know them, you don't really know anyone else, honestly no one will miss you being there. However, I would be sure to be at the reception right away. </p> <p>We purposely only had family/close friends to our ceremony and extended family/friends to our reception. I know not everyone feels this way but I wanted a smaller ceremony of those closest to us watch us take our vows but wanted a kickass party! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266730 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:18:06 +0000 babynumber1 2266730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amelieisme: I would probably skip it. I would be put off that DH wouldn't be able to spend the middle time with you bc he will be on the party bus. Spouses should be allowed also. I understand pictures and all that, but really... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266723 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:13:10 +0000 simplyfelicity 2266723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would either go to the whole wedding or skip it entirely. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266708 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 08:05:25 +0000 blackbird 2266708@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Depends how close it is. If it's an hour drive, I would skip. If it's pretty close, I'd go! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266684 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 07:43:08 +0000 mediagirl 2266684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd go to see my husband in the bridal party. I know he would like to see me in the pew for moral support. Even though he's going to be busy with wedding stuff, you're his spouse. You should be there to support him even if you don't care about the bride and groom. You'll be eating the food and drinking the drink they provide at the reception, you should put in the time to celebrate their union at the church. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266679 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 07:39:52 +0000 rachiecakes 2266679@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In this case, I'd probably go. My husband has had to sit and watch me take part in a couple weddings and I appreciated him being there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266654 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 07:19:50 +0000 looch 2266654@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like a lot of people think that no one will notice if they're at the ceremony or not...I've been to quite a few wedding where the cermony was thinly attended and then the reception is like 500 people, lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266652 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 07:16:13 +0000 catomd00 2266652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The whole point of a weddin is the ceremony. I think it's poor form to skip the important part but still attend the free party. you can spend time alone before the ceremony and in between. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266645 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 07:06:45 +0000 Mamaof2 2266645@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would skip it - no one will even know that you weren't there!</p> <p>Meet DH at the reception and have fun! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266631 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 06:28:15 +0000 regberadaisy 2266631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's rude not to go to the ceremony. It's kind of the whole point of it. </p> <p>I'm not even remotely religious and have sat through super long catholic ceremonies in a unconditioned church in the dead of summer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266618 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 05:49:04 +0000 Applesandbananas 2266618@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm catholic but I say skip! Catholic weddings are usually pretty long and that wouldn't be much fun if you don't know the people getting married. As long as your husband is cool with it, I don't see the harm in skipping! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266616 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 05:41:45 +0000 Charm54 2266616@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in this exact situation last summer...I sort of knew the groom, didn't know the bride, and DH was a groomsman. It was a beautiful part of the country I had never been to before, I was kid-free...I wanted to explore!!</p> <p>It was an outdoor wedding so it would have been slightly more obvious had I not gone. So I went. And it was mildly awkward because I didn't know one other person there so and to sit solo.</p> <p>I did skip the cocktail hour since Dh was off takinf pictures and I literally didn't know any other guest. I went back to the hotel and relaxed and met him at the reception later on.</p> <p>Moral of the story is, I went because I had a guilty conscience but it was a bit awkward. I'm still glad I went though because it helped me meet the guests a bit for dinner - the groom introduced me to the people I would be sitting with at the reception. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266613 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 05:30:31 +0000 FannyMae 2266613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd be skipping the church if it were me - Im used to big orthodox weddings to which 350 people have been invited, so many don't go to the church ceremony. Enjoy your morning to yourself, have a nice lunch and relaxing afternoon and get ready for the reception as fresh as a daisy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266610 Wed, 19 Aug 2015 04:25:31 +0000 Truth Bombs 2266610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't skip the ceremony, it is after all the point of the day (not the party). You weren't invited to the wedding so you could have a day to yourself, if that's something you need, I would schedule it another time. I was in a Catholic wedding of a good friend and one of the other bridesmaids' husbands skipped the ceremony and the rest of us were all pretty appalled, so I wouldn't be so sure no one would notice you were missing. I had never met this guy until the rehearsal dinner but still noticed his absence at the wedding. Lastly, if my husband skipped out on a ceremony that I was a bridesmaid in, I would be bummed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266600 Tue, 18 Aug 2015 23:55:14 +0000 BSB 2266600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amelieisme: How close is the hotel from the church and the reception? If it's not far, you could go back to the hotel. Relax in the room, get out of your shoes for a little while. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266599 Tue, 18 Aug 2015 23:48:47 +0000 BSB 2266599@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@HabesBabe: oh, I think I've been a SO of a groomsmen once and the bride let the SOs tag along. It wasn't a big deal to her for us to come along. As for being around when pictures were being taken, I've done this once but that's because I was part of the family that needed to get pictures taken. I think the rest of the non family guests were enjoying the cocktail hour. I was just thinking that as a family member waiting to take pics, there was a bunch of down time. So I could see how a SO could stick around her groomsmen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/skipping-wedding-ceremony#post-2266584 Tue, 18 Aug 2015 22:53:54 +0000 HabesBabe 2266584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bluestriped bee: I would totally not do this. I think it would be weird and clingy if the spouse of a wedding party member tagged along for pictures just to spend time with him/her. </p> <p>If it were me, I'd attend the ceremony (only because I like weddings), but it sounds like it would be fine if you only attended the reception. Since you're not close to the couple, they wouldn't be offended (or even notice). Can you and the other groomsmen's wife play hooky together? :silly: </p>