https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 19 Apr 2026 17:47:39 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180979 Sun, 17 May 2015 15:35:28 +0000 SweetiePie 2180979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That was a novel. Sorry! I'm just really passionate about baby sleep :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180977 Sun, 17 May 2015 15:29:54 +0000 SweetiePie 2180977@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: We eventually did CIO just to get rid of the final MOTN wakeup he had. I mean TRUE CIO where we didn't even go in to replace a paci. Prior to that, for about 2-3 weeks, I would let him fuss and just keep replacing paci over and over in order to night wean. (Rather than feeding him).<br /> In terms of true CIO, we started it after his 4 month appt when the pediatrician encouraged it. He was waking between 4am and 5am (but this was pretty good since he went down at 7pm) and I knew he didn't need to eat. So we let him CIO in 15 min increments. BUT it was only 15 minute increments of continuous crying. So if he wasn't crying hard or would stop for even 30 seconds, the clock reset. Since he rarely cried for 15 mins nonstop, I would let him cry from 4:30-6am at the longest stretch. It only took 3 nights for him to stop waking and just wake up for the day at 6am.<br /> I just turned off the sound of his monitor and kept his bedroom door shut so that I could faintly hear it, but it was quiet enough that I could kinda ignore it if I was tired enough :-) Which I usually was!</p> <p>Even in the rare case that he did cry continuously and I did a check, I NEver picked him up. It is so hard to do because you just want them to stop and go to sleep. But picking up defeats the purpose of CIO. It's one of those things that is hard to do but the payoff is SO worth it. It is worth it to get some supremely shitty sleep for a few nights of the trade off is that they go to sleep and stay asleep on their own.<br /> I always put him down awake and never rocked him to sleep. Even when he was a newborn. This is something my sleep-obsessed pediatrician pounded into my head. I really think that being able to fall asleep on their own helps with wakings because they can wake and know how to get themselves back to sleep without rocking. </p> <p>I still sometimes have to let him fuss a little at the beginning of a nap but now it lasts for no more than 1 min so I don't even consider that CIO. That's just seeing if he gets settled into the nap and he usually does (unless there are extenuating circumstances like teething).<br /> I never really did CIO for a nap. I just put him down drowsy but awake and replaced pacis over and over if he woke up before the 1 hour mark (sometimes probably 10 times in a half hour period. It was annoying! But he learned that just because he woke up after 45 mins and cried didn't mean his nap was over) and he eventually learned what nap time was and how to extend his naps on his own. He now takes a 1.5-2 hour nap 2x a day and that wasn't always the case. </p> <p>In total, CIO for night waking took like 3-ish days (it seems so long ago but it wasn't more than a week that's for sure). I'm not including the whole process of weaning, just the part where we actually took away the bottle and let him cry instead. </p> <p>I would actually suggest taking a quick read of "12 hours by 12 weeks". It's super short and you can skim and skip chapters on formula for example. Some people find it controversial for a young 12 weeker, but for an 11mo old I think it would be perfectly fine. It just gives steps on how to extend their night wakings, night weaning (if you're interested in that), etc.<br /> I did it almost to a T (very small modifications) and it worked beautifully for us. </p> <p>Also wonder what time you are putting him to bed and when does he wake up from his last nap before bed? Maybe overtired is causing inability to fall asleep and stay asleep? Same with naps, maybe putting down too late for naps? (I have no clue, just offering things I've read over the past 8 months as I am obsessed with my sons sleep!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180973 Sun, 17 May 2015 15:07:21 +0000 jedeve 2180973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: you know, I just have to put this perspective. Right now I want to cry and be like "they will never sleep again!! Parenting is awful!" But I know in a few months it will just fade into "oh yeah we had a bad week a while ago." </p> <p>But yeah, I don't know what my toddler's deal was, haha. Every so often he just takes a bit to wind down. He only went to sleep after I promised to come get him as soon as the sun wakes up. Yeah, I lied. :silly: </p> <p>Lo2 has issues with constipation, and occasionally we overshoot with miralax/prunes/probiotics and then he poops too much. He pooped during his nap this morning. Which at least he pooped, I guess?</p> <p>We're going on vacation next week, so I think we will just try to sort it all out when we get home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180969 Sun, 17 May 2015 15:00:28 +0000 Jess1483 2180969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: Oh no! There is a super awful stomach bug hanging around my town right now (we just got over it), so I'm not sure if that might be making its way your direction. I'm sorry it was so awful. I can't even imagine dealing with sleep issues for baby with a toddler (but I guess I'll have some experience in a few months...) Hope you all get some sleep soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180967 Sun, 17 May 2015 14:58:17 +0000 jedeve 2180967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: it was soooo bad. Lo1 didn't go down til 10, and he is always in bed by 8, so no idea what was going on there. Then he woke up lo2, who then pooped, screamed for an hour, and then we coslept. So...yeah. I think lo2 might have a bit of a stomach thing going on right now so we will have to try another time and just hope he sleeps a bit tonight. But thanks for asking! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180908 Sun, 17 May 2015 13:41:49 +0000 Jess1483 2180908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: how did last night go? I hope there was some improvement. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180837 Sun, 17 May 2015 11:01:39 +0000 BabyTsMom 2180837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: 1) we did a modified Ferber for going to bed only. he was still nursing 1x night at that point.<br /> 2) We didn't have an issue with motn unless it was to nurse.<br /> 3) at the time we sleep trained, his naps were horrible. But I focused on bedtime first, so even after he was sleep trained for bedtime, I was still holding him for all of his naps for a couple more weeks. Then I nap trained but it was pretty uneventful/easy because I think by then he knew how to put himself to sleep.<br /> 4) 2-3 nights.<br /> Id also echo pp and say that you prob don't want to go in at all motn, unless it's at your predetermined feeding time, if you think he still needs one. So even if he gets up multiple times before then, you CIO extinction style. I feel that at you LOs age, they are too alert and doing checks or picking him up motn might not work. Just my 2 cents. it's so hard but really neither you nor your LO is getting the quality sleep you both need, so it just sounds like he really needs to learn how to sleep on his own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180555 Sat, 16 May 2015 16:15:55 +0000 Foodnerd81 2180555@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: it's kind of a blur at this point, but what worked best for us was focusing on one thing at a time. So for us, we started with CIO at bedtime for falling asleep. We set a time in our heads that she didn't need to nurse before (like 1 am) and after we put her down, I would not go back in before that. We let her cry until she fell asleep, no checks (would just make her madder). If she woke up after that but before 1, DH might go in and rock her, only if she was really upset, but I think we let her cry? After that 1 am or whatever wake up, I just went in and nursed her back to sleep every time she woke up. Otherwise she would cry for like 2 hours. </p> <p>We tried doing naps at the same time and it was just a total fail. So I nursed to sleep for naps while we sorted it bedtime. </p> <p>But our bigger problem was falling asleep at night. She usually only woke up once or twice, and would fall back asleep pretty easily if I nursed her, but was taking an hour of nursing and rocking to fall asleep at bedtime. </p> <p>You can only do your best, and no matter what you do, you will feel sure you are doing it all wrong at some point. Good luck!</p> <p>Eta: being able to fall asleep on her own did eventually help with night wake ups. It just took a week or so. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180554 Sat, 16 May 2015 16:14:09 +0000 Jess1483 2180554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: CIO will help with wake-ups, for sure, but only if he cries it out for wake-ups, if that makes sense. I think not going in until 3 (if that's when you'd normally nurse/you think he is hungry), sounds like a great plan. You truly have to ignore anything before that. I promise it will get better so much faster if you do. Then he'll start learning to connect sleep cycles. The problem is that right now, he thinks he needs to be rocked/nursed to sleep to fall asleep, and so if that's not what's happening, he cries. Once he figures it out, he will start to sleep larger chunks. I would not rock him to sleep anymore at any point. If he nurses to sleep (at 3 a.m.), I would even put him down and wake him just a teeny tiny bit in the crib so he falls asleep alone again. I'd say you're done rocking to sleep (barring teething or sick), if you really want to make improvements. </p> <p>Except I need to ask about the paci again, because this may be the time to ditch it if you're having to CIO anyway. If he falls asleep with the paci in (or even if it falls out and he falls asleep, but it was shortly before), he may need it every time. I read somewhere that it explained it'd be like falling asleep in your bed and when you wake, you're on your front lawn. Of course that would be jarring and unexpected and you wouldn't be happy to fall asleep either. That's what it's like when a baby (after about 6 months) has any sort of sleep aid (paci, rocking, nursing), that they can't replicate themselves.</p> <p>I totally hear you on the exhaustion. My guy used to wake every 45 minutes all night long and I literally couldn't think straight most of the time. You're doing great, and it will get better. It will. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180552 Sat, 16 May 2015 16:08:28 +0000 hilsy85 2180552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: so we did it to get down to 1 night waking, from like 4 or 5. I think at most he cried for 45 minutes, but that was at like 5:15am...in the MOTN I think longest was 23 minutes? We did checks though And he was younger, 6.5 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180551 Sat, 16 May 2015 16:07:01 +0000 jedeve 2180551@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: Sorry, I'm just a complete idiot about this. So you didn't do it to get them to STTN, but did it reduce the night wakings? How long did they cry after you put them down awake in the motn? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180550 Sat, 16 May 2015 16:00:24 +0000 hilsy85 2180550@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: I would not rock him to sleep in the MOTN, kind of defeats the purpose. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180549 Sat, 16 May 2015 15:59:56 +0000 hilsy85 2180549@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>1. If you did CIO (whatever variation), did your LO STTN?</p> <p>No, but we didn't do it for STTN, we did it to get him to sleep and then to reduce night wakings to one.<br /> 2. If they didn't STTN, did you keep putting them down awake when they woke up, or nurse/rock when they woke up?</p> <p>I put him down awake and I think that's important to continue to do. </p> <p>3. Did you put them down awake/CIO for naps at the same time as well?</p> <p>We did naps separately. </p> <p>4. How long did it all take?</p> <p>We saw huge improvement by night 3. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180547 Sat, 16 May 2015 15:47:50 +0000 yellowbird 2180547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did cio at 11 months and didn't go in at all. She could find her pack herself. She sttn the first night and has ever since u til potty training. Sometimes she wakes to pee now </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180545 Sat, 16 May 2015 15:40:42 +0000 jedeve 2180545@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: thanks for the info. Argh, I'm such a mess. I feel like we've been doing everything so wrong. I did let him CIO for naps today. His second he fell asleep after three minutes, but he is up way earlier than usual since his first nap was short so I put him down earlier. DH wanted to rock him back to sleep, but I feel like he has got to get out of that habit. </p> <p>I thought CIO would help with the night wake ups, but it sounds like it doesn't? He actually would go to sleep pretty easily (although I would nurse/rock him), but he didn't fight it and it didn't take long. It was just the 6+ night wake ups that are the problem. He isn't connecting his sleep cycles AT ALL. So I thought learning to fall asleep on his own would help. But now I just feel like I will have an overtired baby and another sleepless night. And it's not even that I mind getting up so much, it's it just doesn't seem to help. He just wakes right back up. </p> <p>Argh. I've never been so tired in my life. I've just been shaking for days and my whole chest feels like it's burning. </p> <p>Well I guess tonight we will try to put him down awake again, and I won't nurse him until after 3am? And then it's okay to nurse/rock him and put him down asleep? And before then, just have DH rock him back to sleep? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180535 Sat, 16 May 2015 15:10:56 +0000 Jess1483 2180535@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also, if you don't interfere, I wouldn't be surprised if tonight is similar (lots of wake-ups), but then I'd expect a significant improvement the next night.</p> <p>Good luck! It's very hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180534 Sat, 16 May 2015 15:09:54 +0000 Jess1483 2180534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>At 11 months, I'd probably say don't go in (at all) until you're ready to nurse. And I'd wait at least 6 hours before you do that. And when you are ready to nurse, you need to do it immediately, so that baby knows that if you're going to come, it will be right away. I would not rock or nurse to sleep other than that. (Actually, at 11 months, I'd consider going in right away, saying "it's night night time," and then leaving again without any interaction, since he's probably grasping what those words mean, but I don't think that's necessary either). </p> <p>I'm wondering if the pacifier is a problem? Can he replace it himself? Is that why he wakes? </p> <p>We didn't CIO for naps until night sleep was well established. You don't want them to be overtired, so we did whatever we could to make naps happen while we night trained. </p> <p>We had feeding issues, so CIO was a work-in-progress for quite awhile, but it got significantly better in a few days. </p> <p>This site was immensely helpful for all things sleep when LO was young: <a href="http://www.troublesometots.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.troublesometots.com</a>.</p> <p>Especially: <a href="http://www.troublesometots.com/cry-it-out/" rel="nofollow">http://www.troublesometots.com/cry-it-out/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/sleep-training-naps-and-motn-wake-ups-questions#post-2180458 Sat, 16 May 2015 12:04:17 +0000 jedeve 2180458@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO2s sleep is absolutely horrendous. He has never STTN, is usually up every two hours, and the last few nights he's been up 6-10 times. We typically nurse or rock to sleep. He's 11 mo, 10 adjusted. </p> <p>I let him CIO last night. I gave him a paci about ten or fifteen minutes in. He wasn't hysterical, and all in all calmed down and fell asleep half an hour later. </p> <p>It didn't last though. He woke up at 11, and then about 4 more times before 1. At 1:15 I told DH we should let him CIO again, since rocking/shushing/patting just seemed to make it worse and quite certainly wasn't getting him back to sleep. He fell asleep by 1:45, but then was up at 2:40. He cried off on and on, and so I nursed him at 3:30. Then when I laid him down again, he cried harder, so dh got him up and slept with him in the recliner until 7 or so. </p> <p>This morning I put him down for his nap awake and he cried for about half an hour (I went in there twice) and slept for another half hour (that's about the longest his morning nap ever is, but he was poopy this time.) </p> <p>So here are my questions:</p> <p>1. If you did CIO (whatever variation), did your LO STTN?<br /> 2. If they didn't STTN, did you keep putting them down awake when they woke up, or nurse/rock when they woke up?<br /> 3. Did you put them down awake/CIO for naps at the same time as well?<br /> 4. How long did it all take? </p>