https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 05 May 2026 12:41:48 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1806869 Sat, 09 Aug 2014 07:44:31 +0000 hilsy85 1806869@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: just want to say that I have also heard that the "normal range" is anywhere from 19-30oz, so like @Mrs Green Grass said, days when she gets 18 is pretty close to the low end of normal. I have no other advice, except like I mentioned on your other thread, maybe having her diapers tested for trace amounts of blood? What happens if you try to wake her up to eat so she's eating smaller amounts more often during the day? I'm sorry that this is happening, it must be so so stressful for you! :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1806866 Sat, 09 Aug 2014 07:36:39 +0000 littleredhairedgrl 1806866@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I'm sorry you are going thru this with lo :( I can surely commiserate! A has been refusing her feeds (expressed milk in bottle) for the past few days. She is now on Zantac and I'm hoping it will help but she will seem so hungry and then after about an ounce start freaking out. tried switching the bottles we use and I feed her in the most ridiculous positions and she's only been averaging around 16oz a day (she's a preemie and 3 weeks adjusted, 12 wks actual) and still gaining weight appropriately but boy is it frustrating! Has it gotten any better for you? I'm thinking if it keeps of of going to a specialist.</p> <p>@Mrs Green Grass: did you struggle with this with you little guy? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1806281 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 14:53:29 +0000 Mae 1806281@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs Green Grass: we were told that 24-32 was the range of "normal".... where did you hear 18? The doc did say though that I don't need to stress if she doesn't make it to 24 every day. Really, if she ate happily every few hours and got to (or close to) 20 oz I'd be fine with a "wait and watch her weight" approach. It's the refusing to eat for half (or all) day that freaks me out. Re: feeding larger amounts-- she cries if she wants more when I take the bottle away. Also I guess I'm grateful for the times she eats 6oz because she refuses so much I'm at least happy she gets more in that way. At this point it seems hard to get her to eat more often than every 4 hrs. And she sleeps a lot which is awesome but complicates things. Like today she at 4oz @515 then back to sleep. up at 630. offered food at 8 and she refused. slept 8-845 then ate 3.75oz. slept 1010-1225 then ate 6 oz (so I would've had to wake her up to feed her sooner than 3.5 hours). now she's been sleeping since 2pm and its 4pm. so it will probably be 4 hours between her last meal and this one! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805945 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 12:18:54 +0000 Mrs Green Grass 1805945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely think you should mix for all feeds. Babies can smell the difference. I think that will help a little.</p> <p>I also think a different med is worth a shot.</p> <p>If she eats fine sometimes I don't think it's really a bottle aversion because she'd be fighting it every time. So then it comes back to her reflux being worse in the evening because of either what she's eating or the med not working. I also think it makes sense for the evening to be worse because it builds up over the day.</p> <p>Also...I wouldn't stress too much if she gets up to 18 oz...that's the low end of the average range. I would also try giving a smaller volume at each feeding. 6oz is a lot and might make symptoms worse. Maybe cap at 4 and feed sooner the next time.</p> <p>I was basically stressed about feeding for the better part of a year...it sucks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805914 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 12:04:01 +0000 Woolly Mammoth 1805914@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We didn't have any kind of reflux or allergy issues, but LO was often very fussy at the breast. A lot of the time, the only way to get him to latch was to use the white noise app on my phone. It had to be LOUD, but I could turn it down or off once he got started.</p> <p>Might be worth a try. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805712 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:54:38 +0000 Mae 1805712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: It is so frustrating!! Our LOs really do sound so similar. I'm thinking of trying the breastmilk/formula mixing thing for the weekend just to see (and so I can say I tried it) but if that doesn't work I'm torn between just calling and demanding a referral for a pediatric GI doctor, or just trying her on a MSPI formula for a week or two to see if that fixes the problem. I started another thread with a poll there on which to try. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805693 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:49:19 +0000 spaniellove 1805693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I don't understand why they're so reluctant to switch formulas because that was the first thing our ped did when we called. They consider Zantac a last resort and would prefer not to medicate babies. If you want to try Alimentum, they sell it at Target and Walmart! We had to keep experimenting and learned that the ready to feed version works best for him (of course only the most expensive stuff) but whatever makes him happy... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805688 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:46:03 +0000 Anagram 1805688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>And sorry to blow up your thread---but one other thing that pisses me off so bad is that after me, the original doctor started recommending to almost anyone who had a fussy baby to eliminate dairy. </p> <p>I'm in a mom's group here and a lot of us see the same doctor---and after the incident with me, she literally told 5 out of 8 moms I know to try eliminating dairy from the beginning (none of them ended up having a dairy issue). Grrrrrrrrr. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805680 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:44:27 +0000 Anagram 1805680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Long story short.....I know they are used to dealing with tons of babies, so one having a problem maybe isn't that big of a deal to them. But it is to us as parents, so it's best to just follow our own instincts in these cases. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805673 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:42:56 +0000 Anagram 1805673@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: My LO was always happy unless I was trying to BF or bottle feed her. Which is why it took my ped so long! Even when she wasn't eating, my Ped was very blase about it--I ended up switching to another doctor I like so much more in the same practice. But the original doctor was like---well, if she doesn't break at least 12 oz on any given day, you'll just have to take her to the emergency room for rehydration.</p> <p>But like...NO ADVICE on what would be causing her to refuse eating. It drove me nuts.</p> <p>Thankfully (in a weird way), LO did start having bloody diaper after 3 months old--just teensy streaks of blood in the dipe. I took one to the doctor who FINALLY said, okay...could be an allergy. Why don't you try eliminating major forms of dairy and see how that goes.</p> <p>But at that point, I was done following her advice and I eliminated 100%. I saw an improvement. Around Christmas, she convinced my to give LO Alimentum for 3 days straight as a "test" (I honestly think she still wasn't convinced and maybe the improvements were all in my head?) and THEN LO had the worst blood diaper ever...like, just mounds and mounds of blood in her diapers.</p> <p>So finally THEN at 6 months, she was like..."yeah, she seems to have a more severe intolerance if she can't even have Alimentum". YA THINK?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805669 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:41:32 +0000 brownie 1805669@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: My doctor didn't know anything about dairy intolerance for my son. They couldn't even fathom that the proteins passed through the breast milk. I wouldn't have been able to fix my baby without the internet. I don't always believe in going to google but there are things that you have. </p> <p>You could try going to a more hypoallergenic formula like the nutragimen. You could go off of dairy and see what happens. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805649 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:34:15 +0000 Mae 1805649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: also when i suggested a milk allergy to the nurse today on the phone she said to me "but she is getting mostly milk rather than formula so that can't be it." And like... what? I was like "but she is getting SOME formula. And I do eat plenty of dairy....." and she was like "well regardless, I don't think that's it." Like, did she not realize that breastfed babies can have milk intolerances too? It seemed like she did not know that. And it did not inspire confidence. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805644 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:32:26 +0000 brownie 1805644@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: But you do know that something isn't right or you wouldn't be posting here. You are the mom and you know if there is a problem. You don't know what is wrong but you know that you aren't getting the support that you need from your pediatrician. But with it getting worse at night my first thought is a food intolerance that isn't as severe as my little guys but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805628 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:27:09 +0000 Mae 1805628@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: omg that is heartbreaking :( My LO did that for 2 weeks when she was 2-3 weeks old but that was because she was hungry and I had low supply and didn't realize it. She's so happy now... I just don't know. :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805620 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:24:26 +0000 brownie 1805620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: He screamed constantly until he was 3 months old (and we went off of dairy and he was on prilosec). </p> <p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkQlxf9pdPE&#038;list=UUAEYmWoKef7SEufCk-hGV2g" rel="nofollow">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkQlxf9pdPE&#038;list=UUAEYmWoKef7SEufCk-hGV2g</a> This was a video at about 4 weeks old after being on Zantac for 2 weeks. If you watch he seems to silent reflux in this. It got worse as we got through the day and this was evening time. But not every kid screams constantly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805601 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:20:34 +0000 Mae 1805601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: did he scream when he was not eating? thats the thing is that she rarely seems unhappy/uncomfortable when I'm not trying to feed her. Sometimes she seems extra gassy. but she really never cries unless she is tired or wet or i'm trying to feed her when she doesn't want to eat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805592 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:17:51 +0000 brownie 1805592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: My doctor fought me on food intolerance until I switched doctors and that was after he dropped from the 50th percentile to the .05 percentile (she told me there was no problem). He never had obvious blood in his stool but had all of the other symptoms. One thing that we noticed is that it was cumulative effect. So ultimately, he hurt more in the evening than when he woke up. </p> <p>I hate to suggest this but you may have to head towards hypoallergenic formula. My son never vomited. He just screamed constantly. You know your kid and you seem to know that something is wrong. </p> <p>We did zantac for 3 weeks and it helped for 1 week. Then we did prilosec which hid a lot of the symptoms but I believe it made it more difficult for him to digest the food he was getting and thus the Failure to Thrive.</p> <p>EDT: At 9 months we introduced hypo allergenic formula and he took 9 oz at a time and ate constantly for 2 weeks. Then he refused it entirely after that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805555 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:06:20 +0000 Mae 1805555@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: Whats weird to me is that she improved and then regressed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805551 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:05:56 +0000 Anagram 1805551@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: sounds like whatever it is, she's feeling worse as the day goes on. Whether it's reflux or an allergy or whatever--I agree with PPs...listen to your gut. Doctors sometimes are slow to diagnose if your LO isn't a textbook case of something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805549 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:05:27 +0000 Mae 1805549@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@misstatas: The silent reflux does sound like exactly what my LO has. She hiccups multiple times/day, every day, is super duper drooly, sneezes and coughs, and has a gurgley tummy. I've brought up all these things to my doctor and she said that the hiccups is normal in new babies, as is congestions/sneezing/coughing and some babies just drool. :/ Although they did diagnose her with reflux based on her arching/screaming while feeding and bottle refusal. </p> <p>Was your LO unhappy between feeding or just during? Mine is generally happy as a clam between eating even if she hasn't eaten for a while. Also I don't THINK there is mucous in her poo? I mean-- I'd know right? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805545 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:04:22 +0000 Smurfette 1805545@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Well R won't eat pizza..........</p> <p>Have you tried just doing formula for a couple days? See if that helps? You can still pump.</p> <p>My doc told us to give R 2 weeks on the meds before we should see an improvement but it was within a week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805535 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 10:00:40 +0000 Mae 1805535@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@twodoghouse: hah I just sent DH an email entitled "I can't wait until she can eat pizza because no one refuses to eat pizza." So I'm with you on wanting this feeding phase to pass. I can't really see any correlation with what she refuses. Every day is different but I'd say MOST often it goes like this: </p> <p>1st feed of day - always formula and she almost always eats with no drama then back to sleep</p> <p>2nd feed of day - when she first wakes up again (this time for the day) I always offer breast milk, and she almost always refuses (but this was before the great hunger strike too-- she just never seems to really want to eat now. </p> <p>awake for about 1 hr, then short 30-45 min nap then</p> <p>3rd feed- always offer breastmilk this is usually her best feed of the day-- usually 6 oz (although this morning only 4). </p> <p>Then the rest of the day's meals are totally a crap shoot. I offer breastmilk until I run out, although I always save breastmilk for her bed time meal (not sure why I just always have). there is a 50/50 shot of refusal for any given meal with no apparent pattern as to when or what is offered. And sometimes if she refuses a meal I'll offer the other-- just to see if she'll take it-- and she never accepts one if she's already refused the other. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805530 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:59:44 +0000 misstatas 1805530@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A lot of times zantac works initial and then stops working as soon as a week after startingn it. We only used zantac for four days (required for insurance) before switching to prilosec. LO has silent reflux so she never really spit up but would scream and arch her back during feedings. Other symptoms included frequent hiccups (still has them), drool (from a very young age- It was actually stomache acid :( ), sneezing, congestion, and girgling in her tummy.</p> <p>She also has dairy allergy which I brought up at the same time and got the brush off since there was no blood in her stool. I wish I had just switched formula abd cut dairy from my diet but it took almost a month to make that change (three weeks of playing with medication, a week to accept she still wasn't normal.) Only symptoms were crying and mucus in her poo.</p> <p>We also had a swallow study done because she would cough and gag when eating plus refuse the bottle. That came back normal but I felt it was important to check to make sure she wasn't aspirating milk. </p> <p>Now she refuses to breastfeed during the day but I think she is just going through a nursing strike since the crying has stopped.</p> <p>What I've learned through all this is that you need to trust your gut. If your doctor won't listen find one who does. And for the record, I refuse to talk to nurses now and just make a doctor appointment whenever I have any concerns. The nurse I spoke with originally told me she was crying because I fed her too much formula and she was overfull. I waited a week before being seen because of that dumb advice. The ped told me most nurses will offer advice based on their own child rearing experience and not keep up to date with current practices. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805521 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:56:23 +0000 Mae 1805521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I know... I kept thinking of you this morning and your story. And I know they keep saying it isn't an allergy. And there is no (obvious) blood in her stool. And she's a happy baby and she doesn't projectile vomit. But SOMETHING is wrong. And I'm so scared we'll get to where your LO did with outright refusal and that would be really really horrible bc my LO is not capable (or willing) to dream feed. </p> <p>I just hate feeling like I'm being a hysterical first time mom. I feel like every mom I talk to (in real life and on HB) agrees with me that these issues she is having are not in the realm of normal baby behavior. But I feel like the pediatrician acts like they sort of are and acts like I'm just not accepting that life with a baby can be hard. But I just feel something is wrong and I need to get it worked out for both our sakes. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805508 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:52:39 +0000 twodoghouse 1805508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is there any correlation between the times she refuses and whether it's formula or breastmilk in the bottle? Or does she refuse them both equally? Have you tried switching bottles and nipples? I'm so sorry for your continued struggles. We have other feeding issues that are certainly less stressful but still a pain and I feel bad wishing away this time when they are little but I can't freaking wait until they just eat solid food for their meals and I can stop stressing about formula and how much they are taking and whether they are spitting up from reflux or too big of bottles or what. Ugh. At least this too shall pass... Eventually. Big hugs today mama! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805493 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:48:54 +0000 Anagram 1805493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Not saying our situations are the same, but my Ped kept blowing me off when I asked about allergies, too and said my LO would be screaming all the time if she were in pain. We also went down the "reflux" road and gave zantac but it didn't really help.</p> <p>I honestly wish I hadn't listened to my Ped for so long because I'm pretty sure I gave my LO feeding issues from eating dairy/soy for so long when I knew something wasn't right--but since the doctor kept saying it couldn't be an allergy, I continued doing it until my LO was doing exactly what your LO was doing--refusing to eat all together, which got worse and worse until she had a 2-3 week stretch where she didn't break 17 oz a day, and some days as low as 12.</p> <p>And then she stopped eating awake at all and we had to feed her while sleeping until she was 10.5 months old. Total nightmare.</p> <p>Anyway, as soon as I eliminated dairy/soy 100%, she started drinking up to 24 oz a day, and eventually 28 oz a day (although it was still asleep---but before she would only drink 18 oz or so asleep).</p> <p>Hope you get it figured out soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805479 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:45:31 +0000 looch 1805479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice, just commiseration. </p> <p>I know you don't want her weight to fall off to get attention, but I will tell you that the point of no return for me was when my son didn't stay on his curve, all of a sudden. I was able to use that as ammunition to see a nutritionist. I hate having to game the system to get in to see specialists. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805469 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:44:01 +0000 gilmoregirl 1805469@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd look into a pediatric GI too. We're being referred to one for different issues, but there's a whole behavioral eating clinic at that office and those doctors specialize in this type of thing. It might be helpful to get another opinion. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805459 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:40:28 +0000 MrsKoala 1805459@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: Second this. Maybe a pediatric GI? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/so-frustrated-with-feeding-my-lo#post-1805451 Fri, 08 Aug 2014 09:39:20 +0000 blackbird 1805451@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Any chance you can take her to a specialist just for a second opinion? </p>