https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 13:37:17 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-244111 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 18:38:53 +0000 matador84 244111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The ones here are extremely scummy and honestly, I would have a fit if DH ever went...he wouldn't though, not his thing. I work in a middle school, high poverty and there are several parents that work/worked in strip clubs. Kind of changes things when you see their children having to deal with what mom does to put food on the table... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-244100 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 18:34:39 +0000 photojane 244100@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>some of you have suggested that the reason women don't want their husbands to go is because the relationship is lacking trust. i just wanted to add that i trust my husband implicitly. i know he's not perfect, but i am absolutely not worried that my husband would visit a back room with a stripper. the reason we don't go is because we both feel that ogling naked women/men is not healthy or beneficial to us personally or to our relationship. trust is not the issue.</p> <p>@beka: ME TOO. thinking about strip clubs just makes me sad. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-244049 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 18:06:54 +0000 shinystraps 244049@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's cheating, but I am personally uncomfortable with the strip dance culture for women. I feel silly saying that, because I took pole dancing classes once and LOVED them, so much fun. </p> <p>But then I consider the poverty level of the majority of women who work in strip clubs, and it just makes me want to sit down and cry to think of a mother having to strip for a bunch of guys to put food on the table for her kid. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-244035 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 18:00:25 +0000 Mrs. Superhero 244035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not the same as cheating, but I think it's unhealthy for your marriage, same with porn. I don't say this from a self righteous moral high ground, but as someone who's dealt with the consequences in her marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-244011 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 17:49:43 +0000 SleepyMonkey 244011@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating, unless of course, there is actual cheating going on. i trust husband so i know he wouldn't get into that kind of stuff so i don't mind if he goes with his buddies (most of whom i also trust and are all good guys), but you have to trust him and know what kind of person he is and know what kind of choices he will make when he is there. </p> <p>HOWEVER, i know of men that go to strip clubs and go to the "back room" to get special services that they pay for. so, in that case, it would definitely be cheating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243859 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:58:41 +0000 MsLipGloss 243859@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lozza: Lol! Yep - there was only one place that came to mind. :) So funny how things like that stay with you, and how now every time I hear the word Clermont (or something close to it) I always think *dive strip club.* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243852 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:54:28 +0000 Lozza 243852@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: Oh honey, I miss the ATL like crazy and would move back in a minute if I could! (That reference was to the Clermont Lounge, if you were wondering and/or couldn't tell!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243839 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:47:11 +0000 MsLipGloss 243839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lozza: Why you gotta try to bring down the Atl? *wink* </p> <p>@SorryCharlie: Funny how I am okay around female strippers (I have been to clubs a couple of times), but I am ridiculously nervous and uncomfortable around male strippers (my friends and I hired one for a bachelorette party in college, and I could barely watch!).</p> <p>I will probably rent Magic Mike when it comes out on Apple t.v. I like to keep m y options open - lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243829 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:40:52 +0000 sorrycharlie 243829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: hahah I was thinking the same thing! hellobee is bumpin' today!</p> <p>I don't consider it cheating, but if I were ever upset with my husband attending (and he would never unless it was a bachelor party, even then I'm honestly not sure) it would not be because I didn't trust him, but my own insecurities. </p> <p>That said - he's been in the past (before we were together) and has mentioned how gross they were.</p> <p>I will admit that I loved Magic Mike.. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243828 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:40:01 +0000 Lozza 243828@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There's a strip club in Atlanta with really unfortunate-looking strippers, and it's kind of a hipster hangout. DH went there a few times with friends in grad school.<br /> I think he's also been to a couple "real" ones for bachelor parties, and his friends took him to one for his bachelor party as kind of a joke since it's normally such an un-him-like thing to do. He texted me from the bathroom probably seven times when he was there. I was amused. I have zero problem with DH watching porn so it's not like I object to him seeing other boobs or whatever else, and I think DH is plenty aware of how unlikely it is that any of the strippers are actually interested in clients. Plus, I keep him pretty busy. It's not like the man is in need of additional outlets for releasing tension. So to speak.<br /> I definitely have jealousy issues that I try to keep a handle on, but if we were to ever have a problem with cheating, I think it's about a thousand times less likely that it would involve a stripper than just some woman he'd meet out in the world, regardless of whether he goes to clubs or not.<br /> I think my opinions mirror @Cole's- if it's a group event with his friends, I don't care at all. If it was something that he was doing on his own, or in secret, that would be a big-ass problem for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating/page/2#post-243791 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:26:22 +0000 MsLipGloss 243791@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsJacks: LOL! We're a lively and adventurous bunch today! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243717 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:53:18 +0000 Minnie_Girl 243717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They're a fun naughty outing when you go together, but I am uncomfortable about it when DH goes with the guys. That's because it invites ME to feel insecure. Like lap dances...if anyone but me gives my husband a lap dance, I want to sucker punch the ho. And DH doesn't have to pay for his jollies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243713 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:52:20 +0000 Weagle 243713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I trust DH 100%, but I still consider it cheating. That said, DH has never been to one and won't. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243703 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:45:13 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 243703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: I'm always impressed about how debate threads are done in such a respectful manner. :) Way to go HB! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243700 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:44:43 +0000 mrbee 243700@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been twice in my life and wasn't comfortable either time. I don't like the idea of paying someone to do things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243686 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:37:51 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 243686@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm impressed that the strip club debate found it's way over to the mild Hellobee. Well done! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243633 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:09:26 +0000 loveletter 243633@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's cheating, but I also don't think it's appropriate. For me, it's not about trust- I completely trust my husband not to cheat on me. The issue is that going to a strip club and oogling naked women is disrespectful to me and our marriage. My husband shares the same beliefs about it as me. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243620 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 14:02:40 +0000 Shimmer 243620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's cheating. DH has gone for bachelor party purposes and that's it. He doesn't like going at all. The times (maybe 3?) that he went since we've been together, he told me which one he was going to and I gave him a couple of singles to give to one of the pretty girls. *shrugs* I decided not to stress about him being there.</p> <p>I trust DH 100%. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243592 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:41:08 +0000 ladyfingers 243592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: True, but finding somebody attractive out in the real world, and seeking out a place where you know you're going to be surrounded by people you find attractive ... is kinda different. I think a guy I work with is cute, but I don't want to watch him take his clothes off.</p> <p>ETA: I said all this with a wink btw ... I don't find your answer offensive or wrong or anything! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243584 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:38:26 +0000 ladyfingers 243584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not cheating, but I'd probably be pissed if DH went. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243576 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:32:26 +0000 yoursilverlining 243576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've gone to more strip clubs than my husband has lol he doesn't like anything about them, I see no issue.</p> <p>I dont consider strip clubs or porn cheating. You're married, not dead. It's ok to see members of the opposite (or same) sex as attractive. I think acting or trying to behave like you will never find anyone else attractive ever agin once you get married has more potential for harm than either porn or cheating. I don't consider either a violation of intimacy, because viewing porn or seeing someone shimmy down a pole isn't an intimate act between the performer and the viewer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243556 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:26:03 +0000 LuLu Mom 243556@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I trust him completley and know places like that aren't for cheating. If he went behind my back I would feel different, but him on a bachelor party, I could careless! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243554 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:25:30 +0000 regberadaisy 243554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not unless he was a regular!</p> <p>But overall, no, they don't bother me. My husband has gone for other's bachelor parties and find them quite sad and disgusting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243524 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 13:11:11 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 243524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's cheating since there isn't any touching involved. My husband can see boobs that aren't mine on tv and movies and that doesn't bother me either. He has only been to one strip club though for his bachelor party. His brother surprised him with it. He said it was sort of creepy to see how some of the men looked at the girls. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243505 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:59:18 +0000 photojane 243505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted yes again. I don't see the distinction between porn and strip clubs, and we will never be "enjoying" either. </p> <p>I feel bad for those girls. They can't feel good about themselves. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243487 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:54:40 +0000 Cole 243487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it its cheating but I would be upset if he was hiding it or going by hisself. With a group of friends I see it as entertainment that just doesn't appeal to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243484 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:53:14 +0000 Rubies 243484@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating but I find it highly inappropriate for a married man to go - even for a bachelor party. It would also be problematic if he went in secret. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243479 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:50:57 +0000 Mrs. Pen 243479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>PS: dh has never been to a strip club and I know if anyone asked him, he has no desire to either </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243469 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:48:46 +0000 Mrs. Pen 243469@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't say it's cheating but dh would never go to a strip club, like I said in your other thread- he wants to keep his mind, eyes and body only for me- that includes seeing any other women naked or stripping or the like.</p> <p>Like @mrstiz said, I agree it's wildly inappropriate for a married man to go to a strip club</p> <p>It has NOTHING to do with not trusting my husband; I trust him a million and one percent, it has to do with keeping his eyes pure. Our faith definitely plays into our beliefs/feelings toward it as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spin-off-do-you-consider-strip-clubs-as-cheating#post-243463 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:46:16 +0000 MamaMoose 243463@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly I don't think hubs has ever gone to one. Maybe when he first turned 18? But we've been together since we were 19 and I don't recall him every going since I've known him. It's definitely not something he and his friends would go do for the hell of it. And he made it clear it was not what he wanted for his own bachelor party so that wasn't an issue. However, if he was invited to someone else's bachelor party at a strip club, he would go, and I wouldn't try to stop it. I trust my husband 100% no matter what situation he's in. </p>