https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 05 Apr 2026 20:30:15 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-112222 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 11:05:41 +0000 kml636 112222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>tricky situation. I guess does it work if your husband lays down the law with her and says you are not to be disrespected as a parent? Some people are just beyond reason and in that case than yes, you may have to ban her. I would think really hard though... you don't want your husband or kids resenting you later in life because of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-112116 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 10:13:10 +0000 LivsMama 112116@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>AH! I voted wrong! I voted no, but I thought you were asking if you were out of line. So ignore that. You are NOT out of line. No way in hell would I let her near my child. However, like pps said, you and DH need to be on the same page. He or you need to put your foot down and say that your parenting choices are NOT up for scrutiny, so if they are not liked, too bad. They NEED to respect your parenting decisions. If you dont nip this now, it will continue to get much, much worse </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111876 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 07:50:45 +0000 mrstilly 111876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What is your husband's opinion on the situation? I think he should definitely talk to her and let her know that her behaviors/words are not okay, especially not when she is a guest in your home. Others, especially close family members, should respect your parenting decisions. </p> <p>My inlaws get DS worked up a lot too, and it's frustrating. They don't seem to respect his schedule and his need for sleep, which makes me feel like the bad guy every time I put him down for a nap. </p> <p>You definitely have the right to keep whoever you want out of the room during/after labor. I would definitely let the nurses know that you don't want her there. </p> <p>I repeatedly asked my in laws not to come to the hospital and that we would call them when labor really got underway so they could drive over (about 40 minutes). I was induced, so they knew when I was going in. They showed up 3 hours after I was admitted and never left. They crowded my room while I was in early labor and just wanted to rest, and then paced the halls while I was in labor. The nurses actually had to yell at my MIL to get away from my room while I was in active labor/pushing because she kept trying to sneak in. I think she was upset that my step mom was in the room with me. Looking back it still makes me angry at how blatantly they disregarded my wishes. We weren't trying to keep them away altogether, I just wanted my space until the time got close. </p> <p>I really don't understand how so many people don't seem to realize that by being respectful and offering mainly solicited advice they end up being more included. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111868 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 07:41:26 +0000 Goldilocks1107 111868@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think before banning her from you and the (great) grandchildren, DH needs to have a talk with her to see if that can fix things. As for the hospital, I think the first step is to not even tell them you're there. If they don't know, they can't show up. Then have explicit instructions for the nurses on who is/isn't allowed to visit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111854 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 07:19:46 +0000 autumnlove 111854@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@belleoftheballe: I definitely don't think you are out of line. Thinking of you, hope she comes around! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111848 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 07:13:10 +0000 Andrea 111848@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Has your hubby said anything to her? </p> <p>I don't think you're out of line either! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111843 Thu, 05 Apr 2012 07:11:05 +0000 mediagirl 111843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. You and your husband need to be on the same page, though. Does he understand and agree? It is your family, not hers. You get to do what works for you, not her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111365 Wed, 04 Apr 2012 16:48:03 +0000 heffalump 111365@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all! They need to respect you and your parenting decisions. And I think you're right to let your husband deal with it. Maybe before banning her you can ask him to talk to them though. So at least they know they're doing something wrong and have a chance to change it. And good idea with the nurses, it was nice having them to play the bad guys. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-my-mil-bees-please-help#post-111364 Wed, 04 Apr 2012 16:45:06 +0000 holdonforonemoreday 111364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have two (technically three) MILs in my life. One I HATE and the other one is nice but a bit batty and they are both driving me crazy.</p> <p>The one MIL is actually my DH's grandmother, but she acts like his mom because he grew up with her. We have always had problems with her, more me than him. She smothers him even now. I was actually going to start a post on this today as what happened last night has me so upset. She has always been so drama but last night really takes the cake. His parents came over to see my DH and my son and to get their taxes done. She ignored me the whole time and barely said 5 words to me. This is not unusual, but when it's in my own home, it's not ok.</p> <p>She also wound up my son to the point that we had trouble getting him to go to sleep. She has an opinion on anything and everything, last night it was that I was feeding him wrong. I was feeding him baby food, then let him eat strawberries by hand. He likes feeding himself and she insisted to my husband that I was doing it wrong and that she should feed him like a little baby that he is. (He's almost 14 months!) I was furious by the time they left.</p> <p>My only solution to this (right now) is to tell my husband she is no longer welcome around me or my children. I have already told him that she is not welcome at the hospital after I give birth in June. Last time they just showed up after saying that they were not coming. I will give the nurses a picture and tell them not to let her in. I am tired of being disrespected and treated like I don't exist.</p> <p>Tell me ladies, am I out of line? </p>