Hellobee Boards Topic: Who would you want to be LO's guardian?

Hellobee Boards Topic: Who would you want to be LO's guardian? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 05:34:46 +0000 Chastenet on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235521 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:25:16 +0000 Chastenet 235521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My sister and her husband. I feel bad leaving that burden on our parents as they have already raised their children and I think they should get to enjoy their golden years (even if they still are in their 50s). My sister and I are pretty similar, so it just seemed like an obvious choice for DH and me. Boogs on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235473 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:10:19 +0000 Boogs 235473@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We just had this chat last night. I feel like we have no great options. :( Though, I guess I'll always feel like no one will be better than us. spaniellove on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235424 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:55:57 +0000 spaniellove 235424@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @hilsy85: Oh yeah definitely...I hope that's how it would be spent. For me personally I think it's also about hoping they'd continue to be raised in a similar environment and still be able to have things growing up without taking away from other children in the family. hilsy85 on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235405 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:51:18 +0000 hilsy85 235405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @spaniellove: Oh for sure, I wouldn't choose someone who was living in poverty or anything like that...but I always figured that whatever money we left to the care of our children would help with their raising, could go toward college (if we made college funds), etc. spaniellove on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235398 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:49:21 +0000 spaniellove 235398@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @sweetchic: I don't think there's a maximum age (although there is a minimum age); I'm just not comfortable with the idea of my dad starting over as a parent at 70 or even 80. After a lot of thought and more discussion with DH I think we might ask a cousin of mine once we have a LO. She has 2 older children and understands what our child will go through being biracial and possibly special needs. I'm an only child and DH's sister is too unstable so that rules out siblings. @hilsy85: Yes, but...I'd prefer that the money not be desperately needed for their care. Once you're gone you won't be there to dictate how the money is spent. hilsy85 on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235309 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:23:03 +0000 hilsy85 235309@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I would like my sister and brother in law...DH also has a brother, but they have 3 kids with one on the way, and they both work a ton, so I feel like it would be really difficult for them to manage our LO (and potentially any other LOs of ours). My sister has two kids, and seems like she has a more "scheduled" life, if that makes sense--like she's a bit more organized. But we haven't really come to a conclusion on it...it's something we definitely need to do once LO is born. For those who are concerned about potential guardians not being well off, wouldn't the be the beneficiaries of any life insurance policies/investments that you guys have? I always assumed that's how it worked, so DH's and my savings/life insurance would go to whoever was our kids' guardians, which would allow them to hopefully have the financial means to raise our kids and not add any financial burden onto them. looch on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235249 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 10:03:17 +0000 looch 235249@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We have no idea either. We have the added bonus of having families in two different countries on two different continents. So the big thing for us is where we will be living and how the laws apply. For example, since I am not a citizen of the country I live in, I would have to leave the country if my husband and I divorced. No idea what would happen if he died, if I'd be allowed to stay. We really need to get moving on finding an attorney that has a clue. Meridian on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235244 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 09:59:34 +0000 Meridian 235244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @spaniellove: Is there an actual legal age that make someone too old to be a legal guardian? Or is it that 70 just seems too old to be one? Ugh, this topic weighs on me too... my parents are older too (dad is 67, mom is 64), but they are financially well off and would be able to provide for my (hypothetical) children. DH's parents are not well off, and I don't think they would be able to (although they might want to). My sister is only 21. DH's sister and her husband would be the most logical choice, but they have 2 kids and I don't agree with all of their parenting choices, and some of their decisions really baffle me. So, no idea. LuLu Mom on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-235082 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 08:29:56 +0000 LuLu Mom 235082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Right now we are planning on using DH's brother and sister in law. They are my age and financially capable of offering her a similar lifestyle to what we would be able too. My siblings would both great candidates too, but not as financially well off as DH's sibling. Mrs. Jump Rope on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234759 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 20:26:56 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 234759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ This was a hot topic of discussion in our household for a REALLY long time. We made a list of values and characteristics we wanted in a person/persons to care for our child, and potentially future children. When we made our list of requirements of a guardian, it was pretty clear who we should name guardian. It's also important to note that we made the decision based on both of us dying within the near future. We will re-evaluate in the future based on the number of children we have, the health and age status of the family we've already named guardians, and where we're living at the time. Cole on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234711 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:51:14 +0000 Cole 234711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We don't have a baby yet so it has all been a hypothetical and I kept hoping that things would be more obvious by the time we started our family. My parents would be my first choice but my father is in poor health and between work and caring for him my mom would be just in over her head. His parents are enjoying being empty nesters so much and have really forgotten what it is like to have little ones around, it feels like it would be a big burden to expect them to spend the next 18+ years raising our kids. None of our siblings are in a place where they would be ready to parent with the exception of the one I would like least to be guardians. Eventually, I could see my brother or my husband's youngest brother being the right choice once they are married (both have awesome long term girlfriends.) Not a fun thing to ponder... Rainbow Sprinkles on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234699 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:34:18 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 234699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My younger sister and her soon to be husband. They are super fun and outgoing, and love to do active things (what we would do with our children). They also hold the same religious beliefs and are similar in age to us, which I think is important. oliviaoblivia on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234693 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:31:24 +0000 oliviaoblivia 234693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH and I decided on my sister and her husband. We are going to talk to them about it next week. They are the most settled of our siblings and live close to my parents. I have a friend who chose me as guardian, but didn't tell me until after the fact and it totally freaked me out. I love her little girl dearly, but was happy I didn't get an out of the blue phone call. loveisstrange on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234676 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:12:05 +0000 loveisstrange 234676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH and I have discussed this. With him being military, they want you to do your will and stuff before a deployment. I think we've decided that it's going to be my oldest brother and his ladyfriend. They've already raised one daughter and I trust them to raise mine. Foodnerd81 on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234674 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:05:41 +0000 Foodnerd81 234674@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My older sister and her husband (although I haven't talked to H about this, actually). They already have a son and I know my sister would raise our (future) child as her own and would make sure to talk about us too, plus keep in touch with relatives on both sides. They are well off, but honestly, once we have a kid I plan to get pretty darn good life insurance policies so hopefully that wouldn't matter anyway. The only reason I could see reevaluating is we live in Boston, and they will be in NJ, so once the kids are older, I could see not wanting to uproot them. Smurfette on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234672 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 19:03:35 +0000 Smurfette 234672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We haven't talked about this yet but I have thought about it. My brother and sister-in-law live to far away. DH sister and her husband live 4 hours away and live in a small town that I wouldn't want my kids growing up in. My sister isn't married, so I am not sure how she would feel about it. So basically no clue! MamaMoose on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234667 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 18:50:54 +0000 MamaMoose 234667@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My brother and his wife. They share our same values across the board and they are very well off and would be able to provide for our children. We plan to ask them in a few weeks. lovehoneybee on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234666 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 18:48:15 +0000 lovehoneybee 234666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Most likely DH's oldest brother and his wife. They have two kids already, but they are well-off (I hate that that was a consideration, but it was--they can financially handle taking on another child) and have very similar religious and political views as we do. chrispygal on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234624 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 18:20:42 +0000 chrispygal 234624@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Sadly, we didn't feel comfortable with any of our siblings. We will be asking DH's uncle, who is my age, and his wife. They have two kids and are amazing parents. If they do not feel comfortable with the responsibility, we will be asking our close friends who are like siblings to us. I know they would love our daughter like their own. DH has 14 year old twin sisters, and we will be the guardians for them should anything happen to DH's mother and step-father. It's a great responsibility, but one we welcome - especially now that we know understand how important it is to know those we leave will be well taken care of. Andrea on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234613 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 18:10:26 +0000 Andrea 234613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We chose my parents. ladyfingers on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234605 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 18:08:05 +0000 ladyfingers 234605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH's best friend and his wife. We'll ask them first (they have two kids) but we're both only children and all our parents are almost 70. Honeybee on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234586 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:44:31 +0000 Honeybee 234586@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We've specified that out kids would go to my SIL if anything happened to us. She's in her late 30's, single, has a really great/steady career, good income, owns her own house, etc... Neither of us felt comfortable leaving our kids to our parents due to health issues; and I pretty much immediately eliminated my sisters because they're completely unreliable (except for maybe my little sister, but she has some medical issues to deal with). That left my two SILs, one of which already has a kid of her own and isn't the most stable person in the world... The older SIL is also the only person out of both families I feel would make a real effort in terms of keeping both families in touch with the kids. And she's our kids' godmother, so we know she'll keep our kids involved in our religion (which my family absolutely would not do, and most of DH's family is no longer practicing). chopsuey on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234582 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:40:15 +0000 chopsuey 234582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My parents are her legal guardians. autumnlove on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234578 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:32:43 +0000 autumnlove 234578@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH's oldest brother! mediagirl on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234571 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:28:02 +0000 mediagirl 234571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ As much as we're not really close, I would want my brother and SIL to be her guardian. They are well off and would provide an amazing life for her full of experiences she wouldn't get elsewhere. Running Elley on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234567 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:27:04 +0000 Running Elley 234567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ That’s a good question. I’d say my sister but I’m not positive. I’ll have to talk to DH about this! spaniellove on "Who would you want to be LO's guardian?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/spinoff-who-would-you-want-to-be-los-guardian#post-234562 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 17:23:32 +0000 spaniellove 234562@https://boards.hellobee.com/ After reading Mrs. Jump Rope's post about wills, I realized that DH and I have a dilemma about guardianship. My parents are too old to become guardians of our children (my dad is almost 70) and I am 100% opposed to DH's family raising our child because their values are so different from ours and we know they don't treat children equally. Who have you decided on or would you consider to be LO's guardian?