https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 17 May 2026 10:45:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000480 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 22:42:59 +0000 Mama Bird 2000480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For a child that young, everything is an "activity". Especially since he's in a completely new environment! You don't need to get out the house and do something organized for them to have a good time. My son got the biggest kick today out of washing his toy dishes, and "brushing" everyone's hair (for some mystery reason, he was brushing it with imaginary oil from his toy frying pan). I don't think he would have enjoyed a trip to a museum nearly as much, especially with all the time we'd have spent just sitting on a train to get there.</p> <p>Like so many said, you're still getting to know each other, and too many activities could be overwhelming. It's better to take it slowly and see what your son really likes, and what is too much, or simply doesn't interest him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000472 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 22:25:42 +0000 Kemma 2000472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is 26 months and we do organised activities three days a week. Monday and Wednesday we attend a small, informal community Playgroup (&lt; ten kids) and Friday we go to a toddler music class which includes snack time and free play (25-30 kids plus parents).</p> <p>In your situation I think your LO might do ok / cope better with smaller, more informal group activities so he can take his time to suss the environment out :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000146 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:27:37 +0000 youboots 2000146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: yes I did edit it, but it was prior to seeing that you responded. We were probably typing at the same time. Glad we cleared that up ;)</p> <p>ETA I'm still learning board etiquette. So I'm not sure if editing posts shortly after posting is ok. Or once it's posted to leave it alone and add ETA. Thanks for being patient with me. Please wall me if there is some sort of general etiquette document I should read up on or if you have any more thoughts so that the original post is not hijacked. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000139 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:23:50 +0000 looch 2000139@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: In fairness you did edit your post. I believe you had originally written that 5 days a week of scheduled activities were not a good thing for any child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000134 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:21:33 +0000 youboots 2000134@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: thanks for jumping in, I phrased it with IMO and may not be the best thing so I would not be generalizing, I'm sorry you read it this way. The OP asked about a daily scheduled activity which to me reads as a specific time and place planned in advance, my concern is that this to me seems like a difficult pace to be sustainable (which is why I notated 5 days a week in classes). I agree each child is different and some kids need to do multiple activities every day, and getting out of the house every day is awesome. I'm just sugessting a flexible approach, more drop in and informal activities. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000117 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:11:57 +0000 youboots 2000117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shopaholic: I was trying to think of the right way to say it, informal socialization was what I was trying to think of. @hotchildinthecity your son is getting socialized just by leaving the house and seeing the world. It does not have to be a formal class with a time and other kids his age for him to be learning and engaged. I hope y'all get what I'm saying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000115 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:10:35 +0000 looch 2000115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: I wish you wouldn't generalize like that, some kids are very high energy and getting out of the house every single day and doing an organized is exactly what they need. I am of the mind that you can't really make a determination until you see your own kid in action. If they're super chill, great. If not, then no amount of sitting them down calmly is going to get all their energy out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000112 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:08:40 +0000 shopaholic 2000112@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think in your unique situation, you do need the time just to get situated, start a routine, and get in a groove with just a new little person! I also think scheduled activities every day could be very overwhelming for your LO. I would not stress about it, and you'll find your rhythm and seek more activities the more comfortable you both get. </p> <p>As for your question, we don't really do a "set" schedule of activities each week. We were doing 2 different classes last session (ended recently). I usually try to schedule at least one mommy &amp; me class going on at a time. We do try to meet up with different friends a couple times a week, and we both love to get out of the house, so we're out and about doing something almost every day. I feel like even every day errands, taking my almost 2 y.o out with me, she gets a lot of socialization and learns about the world. But the idea of "scheduling" something every single day sounds daunting and exhausting. Hang in there and I'm sure you'll figure out what works for you soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000110 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 18:06:10 +0000 youboots 2000110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hotchildinthecity: I've been reading up on slow parenting and I appreciate the values. Not sure what approach you are going for, but IMO a packed schedule 5 days a week in classes may not be the best for any two year old. Our culture seems to value being busy, and that's fine, but literally keeping up with the Jonses on FB may not be a good thing to be modeling your parenting journey after. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000098 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 17:58:40 +0000 hotchildinthecity 2000098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: I agree and I think DH is suffering a little from FB syndrome! He sees a lot of friends with toddlers running all over the place and posting photos but obviously our situation is different as we're just getting to know each other! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000086 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 17:50:28 +0000 MrsMccarthy 2000086@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like the Super Nanny approach which is to have time set aside for special activities every day but I do not think that they have to be outside the house everyday or with other kids every day. I'd aim for 3 days a week at least social and the rest just fun interactive games, trips to the park or museums or long walks where you explore together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000076 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 17:41:15 +0000 youboots 2000076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not a parent yet, and I know only a little about adoption, but following along with you and reading the other responses I feel that this is such a unique situation that you really can not do what others are doing just because they have a child that's the same age or they SAH. Just being in new place with everyone who speaks a different language seems really overwhelming. At this point building trust and bonding while having your son adjust to your home seems like a lot on its own. Leaving the house every day sounds great, especially familiar places like the grocery store or coffee shop. However having scheduled activities everyday seems exhausting for both of you. I think you should consider how people act with a newborn, staying at home, taking it easy and getting to know each other can still be applied in some ways here. Just my thoughts, not sure if it's worth much. I'm so so happy for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-2000065 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 17:32:40 +0000 Mrs. Polish 2000065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any scheduled activities with our almost 2yo. If we want to go somewhere we do, but he isn't enrolled in anything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999704 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 11:39:13 +0000 jedeve 1999704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is 2 and we don't do any classes. I run an outdoor play/hiking group once or twice a week. Other than that it's just going to the library or the park or meeting up with friends. He still sees other kids at this stuff and gets socialization that way.</p> <p>Just enjoy your mat leave. My guess is rather than socialization your LO needs to learn about quality relationships. Socialization with you is probably enough at this point! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999692 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 11:35:00 +0000 hotchildinthecity 1999692@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: thank you :). Great points. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999691 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 11:34:28 +0000 hotchildinthecity 1999691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Fronkinzankinsbride: right now he's pretty easily overwhelmed by activities/socialization so im definitely wanting to still expose him but take it slow. Sometimes he has an awesome time....sometimes he just clings to me.</p> <p>I am also super super sensitive right now about any comments related to how I am parenting so I think DH needs to start watching what he says :shocked: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999688 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 11:30:51 +0000 hotchildinthecity 1999688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: he'll be starting daycare in March when I go back to work. So I definitely want to get him used to other kids but I think slower/gradual is a better approach. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999586 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 10:08:34 +0000 Greentea 1999586@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hotchildinthecity: no way. Take your time. Spend your time loving up LO and adjusting. The most important thing is becoming comfortable - for you as a mom and for LO in his new life. The bond between parent and child is n.1. I would agree to once a week maybe. Motherhood is a humongous adjustment and for LO as well.</p> <p>Eta: tell DH that I took LO to every Christmas activity and we have all missed Christmas- for a whole week now we have had the most horrible stomach flu. I know that can happen anytime blah blah but honestly I am going to even further tone down my winter indoor children activities! Just something to consider. It is cold and flu season and no one needs that added stress. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999580 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 09:58:09 +0000 Fronkinzankinsbride 1999580@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I completely agree with @foodnerd81's point. You are just getting to know each other. I feel like spending quality time present with your child could be more valuable than trying to push your LO to interact with strangers in an activity every day. Especially in a limited amount of time that is maternity leave. Doing a few scheduled activities together can be great if he seems to enjoy that. But getting out of the house for non-structured days are great for development too. If you have to rush from music class to story time you lack the opportunity and the time to ask him "what do you want to do with your day today?" Maybe instead of the animated librarian reading a new book each week, today he wants his momma to read his favorite book 16 times...and giving him that is invaluable and irreplaceable. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999542 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 09:17:47 +0000 Foodnerd81 1999542@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's inportant to remember that most parents of two year olds have had two years to adjust and get to know their two year old. Your two yo has some unique issues so obviously your approach will be unique. </p> <p>I agree with you on having fewer scheduled activities, especially as you are still working out sleeping and tantrums and whatnot. Fwiw I only have two scheduled things that I go to with my 17 mo (both free) plus a weekly play date, then the other days it's a mix of seeing friends, groceries, etc. I think she socializes plenty even just at the grocery store and that it's important for her to experience real day to day stuff, not only things that are centered around her (or, maybe I tell myself that so I'll feel better about not doing more activities for her?). </p> <p>In the end, I'm a big proponent of You know your child best, so what's best for another LO isn't necessarily what's best for yours. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999532 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 09:08:50 +0000 fancyfunction 1999532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We do organized activities 2-3 times a week, I don't want to completely overwhelm either of us. Other days we go out to do errands or sometimes just stay in and color<br /> And play :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999530 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 09:07:15 +0000 cait 1999530@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I stay at home and we have a library story group we go to once a week. We might add something else this spring, but I am honestly not concerned. Learning and socialization comes in many forms, like solo play and helping you run errands! It does not all need to be from structured activity, those can be great for some but overwhelming for others! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999528 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 09:05:21 +0000 hummusgirl 1999528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm on your side, but could you ask your adoption agency or pediatrician? Your husband might respond better to an impartial third party. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999497 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:32:32 +0000 MamaCate 1999497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't sah so take this with a grain of salt but I think getting out of the house every day is good for everyone's sanity most of the time. But, I think that includes the park, grocery store, errands, etc. you are helping lo acclimate to your life and your world here and that is a big part of socializing to your environment. I do solo parent a lot on the weekends and I think it is good for lo to come on errands to see that food and toiletries don't magically appear at the house, you know?</p> <p>I think time will do the talking in this case and I would encourage you to trust your mama gut! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999484 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:20:09 +0000 meredithNYC 1999484@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think given that he had so little socialization in Korea would mean that you should probably start slowly. Honestly, at this time of year there's just not as much going on anyway. But come Spring, he will probably be much more acclimated to his new routine and it will be easier to get out and doing things.</p> <p>To answer your question, I have a 2.5 year old and at the moment we don't do any organized activities aside from preschool two mornings a week. The rest is just playdates and little trips to the park, museum, library, indoor playground at the mall, etc. And some days we just run errands. I think it's good for kids to have some "down" time, the same as it is for adults, you know? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999479 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:15:56 +0000 Applesandbananas 1999479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I was on mat leave, we got out once a day, towards the end of mat leave, because I was going nuts in the house alone. </p> <p>I think you should do what's comfortable for you and your LO. Maybe you can talk more with DH about what all you are doing and how your LO is responding to those situations, so he has a better feel for what's realistic and what isn't. </p> <p>When I was on mat leave, DH thought I should have the house spotlessly clean and a full meal I the table when he got home every day. He didn't understand how much work caring for an infant was! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999477 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:14:56 +0000 hilsy85 1999477@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hotchildinthecity: I still think that it's better to go about it slowly rather than throwing him into classes 4x a week, you know? He'll be going to preschool in a year or so I imagine?, and will have plenty of structure then. I would just focus on getting into a routine with each other, and then see if there's a class or a regular play date that fits in well. Socialization happens on the playground too! (Altho that's tough in the winter). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999475 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:14:09 +0000 hotchildinthecity 1999475@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@illumina: it sounds manageable at some point but right now I feel like I'm still just ducking tantrums and struggling with the language barrier ;)</p> <p>@Ree723: same here! I don't think DH realizes how much I do during the day on top of entertaining LO. Laundry, cooking, errands etc. Sometimes it's nice to just have a quiet morning where he plays with his cars... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999473 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 08:12:21 +0000 hotchildinthecity 1999473@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: LO had very little socialization in Korea and my DH is worried about the effect it's had on him. So yes, I think he wants us to have more socialization overall.</p> <p>@looch totally agree! At this point DH has never been alone with him for more than an hour. So he doesn't exactly know what it's like to haul all the way to a class, only to have LO whine and cling the whole time. He does one nap a day for 2 hours. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/staying-at-home-how-often-should-you-have-activities-planned-for-your-lo#post-1999467 Sun, 28 Dec 2014 07:58:15 +0000 Ree723 1999467@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a SAHM to a 2.5 yr old and a 10 month old. We head out to organised activities once, sometimes twice, per week, and that is plenty for me! We go for walks, run errands, and just do stuff around the house on the other days and I feel that's a great balance. On the weekends, DH is home and we usually run errands one day, and head off on an adventure of some sorts the other day (this is in addition to the one or two activities I do on my own with the girls during the week). </p> <p>Honestly, I think it all comes down to personal preference - the thought of doing something every single day, plus taking care of the house and managing the errands, makes me want to curl up in a ball and not get out of bed. For other people, the thought of being cooped up in the house with a baby/toddler all day makes them want to tear their hair out. </p> <p>I think your DS needs time to adjust, as do you, and there is no better place to do that than in your own home, doing things together. One or two activities per week sounds like plenty and I would leave it at that for now. If you think he needs further socialisation, then by all means look for more things to do, but I'd say your DH's expectation is a little unreasonable right now. I also think always having an organised activity potentially limits a child's ability to learn how to entertain themselves.....just my opinion though. You've got to find the right balance for you :-) </p>