https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 02:41:09 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706614 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 22:56:36 +0000 rawrasaur 706614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think about it much anymore, but I did a lot in the following weeks. My experience was not bad at all. I think it is because it was such a different experience and I just had people all up in my business for 2 days straight, so that was super awkward. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706604 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 22:43:47 +0000 mrskc 706604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I still think about my L&amp;D and I'm 6 months pp. I think it's totally normal. I had a very positive birth but I thought about it frequently for weeks afterwards. Trying to remember all the details, thinking back on it. I still do actually. I try to remember the moment my son was born, and I can't so that makes me kind of sad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706583 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 22:15:55 +0000 mrsjazz 706583@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My birth experience was pretty traumatic and for a while I didn't think I would get pregnant again because I never want to go through that again...but I've moved past it and definitely want baby #2.</p> <p>But as LO's birthday approaches, I was thinking about her birth and how excited and happy my husband's face was as he saw the doctors taking her to the exam table. I had never seen/heard him that excited before and I get jealous because I didn't have that experience. I was in pain and drugged up and wasn't the first person to hold my baby like I thought I would be.</p> <p>So, yeah, I think regardless of what type of birth you had, I think it's normal to be thinking/trying to process the experience afterwards. I don't think you need to be "over" it, take the time to process--it's a life-changing experience. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706574 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 22:07:51 +0000 sarac 706574@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>19 months post partum, I'm still not 'over' my traumatic birth experience. I think it's really sad that you're expected to be. People say things like 'it's only one day of your life!', or 'it doesn't matter how the baby gets here as long as they're healthy!'. It's a lie. Some women feel that way, great. But lots don't. Lots of women hope for a specific type of birth, and if they don't get it, they're reasonably and understandably sad.</p> <p>Lots of women get the kind of birth they want, and get to feel really happy and fulfilled and satisfied with it. When someone doesn't, they're often just expected to chin up and get over it. I think that's horrible. My daughter's health was the most important thing, but next on my list was my experience, as it should be. I didn't get anything approaching the natural birth that I wanted, and it breaks my heart. I would have done literally anything to ensure her health, but I would also have liked to have had a beautiful natural birth. Whatever you were hoping for, it's reasonable to be disappointed if you didn't get it.</p> <p>I've processed it to the point that I'm not reliving it or wondering if I could have done anything differently. But I'm still sad about it. I'm really hoping to go on to have a natural birth with my next child.</p> <p>I think that many women feel the need to process the experience, even when it's positive. It's one of the most powerful and biggest things we'll ever go through. A negative experience is all the more demanding. Don't feel bad about needing to take some time to deal with it. You're not alone, and you're not weird. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706531 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 21:36:27 +0000 Mrs Green Grass 706531@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely have elements of PTSD - seeing almost any firm of birth in a movie, especially if there is a problem, totally makes me cry. My labor was actually the easiest part of my experience, but I still think about elements of my hospitalization at least every couple of days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706486 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 21:07:37 +0000 rachiecakes 706486@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: I think it's normal. For me, 16 months later, there are so many 'what ifs'. What if I did this, would I have been on bed rest? Did being on my left side for weeks push DS into his posterior position? Would I have avoided an episiotomy if I had started yoga early to get him in a better position? Would that have helped circulation and my high blood pressure?<br /> The answer is - who knows? Baby J has his own story how he came into the world, every step was our unique journey together.<br /> I do think that going over it in my mind gets me amped up for a "perfect" second pregnancy &amp; delivery but I may find that it's only about to be something different altogether. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706428 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:30:07 +0000 heffalump 706428@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Lo is 20 months and I still think about it. Especially when thinking about ttc in the future..... I had a pretty easy labor and delivery but in no way was it fun and something I'm looking forward to experiencing again. I just have to keep telling myself that I get a baby in the end, so its worth it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706408 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:21:06 +0000 FarmWifeGina 706408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: Um, yeah, any birth professional should understand how important the experience and processing and talking about that experience is to women. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706406 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:20:23 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 706406@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I rehashed mine a lot the same way I re-hashed my wedding. I couldn't really believe that I was capable of it and I had a blast during delivery. As one of the happiest and important memories of my life, I often thought about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706365 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:04:38 +0000 Corduroy 706365@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow - thanks for all the replies. It helps immensely to hear that others have felt this way. I think several of you hit the nail on the head with the enormity of the experience. It is a whole lot to process so why shouldn't I expect it to take time.</p> <p>After seeing the replies I realized that I was probably feeling like something was wrong with my thoughts because of my 6 week post partum visit yesterday. I asked my doctor a couple questions I had about details of the birth. She made me feel weird for even asking. I was planning on looking for a new OBGYN anyway. I think I'll do that now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706357 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:02:52 +0000 aprk 706357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am one week post partum and still very much in shock, I think. We are both healthy, although I am still store as $&amp;*#. My labor and delivery were super rough - both my midwife and doula commented that they had never seen anything so intense.</p> <p>I do think it's affecting my bond a little bit, but it's slowly getting better. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706352 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:00:37 +0000 googly-eyes 706352@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I STILL think about it sometimes and I'm almost 7 months pp! I think it's normal. It might help you and others to post your birth story! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706301 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 19:38:47 +0000 immabeetoo 706301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a relatively easy, fast labor for a first time mom but I've found myself rehashing it more lately. I think it's normal! It is a huge event that you hardly have time to process at the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706281 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 19:21:42 +0000 FarmWifeGina 706281@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The births of our children, whether good or bad experiences, stick with us for our entire lives. It is a defining rite of passage. Physiological, psychological, and hormonal functions are at full force in that experience and it's HUGE, whether our culture acknowledges that or not. It's ok to still be processing. How long afterwards did you remember and talk about your wedding day and all the little things you could recall? Now apply that to birth and multiply it about 50,000,000 times, lol. That's how huge birth is. To a certain extent, we're probably processing it every day for the rest of our lives. I know I still think on and remember my son's birth over 4 years ago. It was a good experience, although a little traumatizing just because I was expecting intense, just not quite that intense, lol. With my daughter, I warriored through and was processing and remembering and in awe of myself for probably 6 months after her birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706264 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 19:10:46 +0000 Arden 706264@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: I just wrote on your wall. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706258 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 19:09:49 +0000 lovehoneybee 706258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think about it on a fairly regular basis and I'm 8 months pp. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706199 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:31:44 +0000 Dandelion 706199@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm traumatized...but mine's a totally different monster. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706197 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:30:03 +0000 wheres_c 706197@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm at 4 months and think about it often, but I had a traumatic experience. I feel like I should be over it by now, but I just can't. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706168 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:14:10 +0000 loveisstrange 706168@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: if you need someone to talk to, let me know. I had a traumatic experience as well. I had PTSD from it. Just remember that is does get better. The pain fades, you start to forget and everything doesnt seem so bad anymore.</p> <p>I think labor and delivery is kind of a shock to the system. Its definitely going to take some time to sort through it. Talking about it helps. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706167 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:13:57 +0000 Mrs. Chalk 706167@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup, I was the same way, particularly with my first. For weeks (months?) afterwards, I would find myself thinking about it a lot. Overall, it was a really positive experience, but I just spent so so much time trying to recall all the details, bugging my husband with questions about things I couldn't remember, and just generally trying to process it. I've been the same way with my daughter (now three months old), but to a somewhat lesser degree.</p> <p>Birth is such an enormous event. For nine months, I thought about it, worried about it, planned for it, and then - all of a sudden - it was over. I think part of my problem was that it was all just so quick, and I suddenly went from having this *thing* looming ahead of me to it just being over, and having to move on to the next phase of actually being a mother. I wasn't let down that it was over, more just had a hard time with that moving on stage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706161 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:10:59 +0000 pinkb 706161@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I still think about my experience, and I am 14 weeks pp. I think it is just because of what a huge experience it was and it changed everything. All my thoughts are positive so I dont feel as if I shouldn't be thinking about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706154 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:08:13 +0000 edelweiss 706154@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>when you think about it, is it in a positive or negative way (or just neutral)?</p> <p>by all accounts my labor/delivery was fairly routine, and i tried to be open-minded about how it would go--even then, i *still* process it a bit (3 months postpartum).</p> <p>it's a huge, life-changing even that in certain ways goes by in the blink of an eye, so i think it's normal to be processing it for quite some time afterwards. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706149 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:06:21 +0000 Arden 706149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm experiencing the same thing, although I'm only two weeks PP. </p> <p>My experience was traumatic though, and I do think I might be struggling with accepting the negative parts of the experience. </p> <p>I'm interested to see the other answers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/still-processing-birth-experience#post-706136 Wed, 10 Apr 2013 18:01:38 +0000 Corduroy 706136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm six weeks post partum and I'm starting to wonder if I'm too hung up on my birth experience. I think about it, recall different details, and try to piece it together. My experience wasn't negative so I'm not sure why I'm still thinking about it. </p> <p>I looked into PTSD but my thoughts aren't intrusive or upsetting so it didn't seem to fit. My thoughts aren't keeping me up at night or affecting my bond with my daughter. I just get the sense that I should be 'over it' by now and I'm not. </p> <p>Is this normal? Did you need to 'process' labor and delivery? </p>