https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 21 May 2026 23:25:42 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training/page/2#post-2779456 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 12:19:43 +0000 psw27 2779456@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also, as others have said - there is no gold medal for your kid being potty trained. So I would give yourself the right to be like "nope, not working for my kid right now - oh well!" No need for pressure or disappointment, easier said than done.... parenting is hard! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training/page/2#post-2779455 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 12:18:55 +0000 psw27 2779455@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't read every comment, so if this is repetitive I'm sorry. My LO is stubborn and strong willed so I tried to force it at one point when he was around 29 months and was like whoa, this isn't working and I don't want to make potty a "thing". One day, literally, just randomly he woke up from a nap and said he was all done with diapers. It was only about 2 months later but a lot of kids at school were trained. He had been exposed to the potty, we had tried in the past, etc. so he understood the concept of not wearing diapers anymore but this was his choice. </p> <p>So, we stopped wearing diapers and he still had plentyyyy of accidents but I would say by 3 he was fully trained with maybe 1 accident a week. He still occasionally has accidents now but he's 97% trained. We are not night trained or nap trained, but I am not worried about that at this point. He will call out to us to go potty in the evenings before he falls asleep and in the mornings, so he is getting there. </p> <p>I would back off of it for a while, keep the potties out and keep offering but no pressure. Once other kids at school are getting trained she might just surprise you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779442 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 11:45:08 +0000 PawPrints 2779442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>An update from my comment earlier: I am told by DD's daycare teachers that she basically potty-trained herself this week. With no prompting from them, she is using the potty all day long and staying completely dry in one pull-up that they don't have to change. Um, YES. So I count that as points for team wait-til-they're-ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779435 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 11:16:32 +0000 Bluemasonjar 2779435@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine DS was born July 2015. We bought a potty a few months ago and introduced him to it but he has shown very little interest. At first he wouldn't even sit on it so I offered him a few M&amp;M's to make it a fun thing instead of scary. Then I started just sitting him on it before his bath and he has peed a few times but doesn't seem to care. His daycare has started putting the kids on the potty at least 1x a day. I'm not going to push him and wait until he shows more interest but in the meantime we are talking more about it and reading books. I agree there seems to be a race among parents but this thread has reinforced that I am better off waiting for him to be ready rather than dragging out the entire process. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779434 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 11:14:46 +0000 gingerbebe 2779434@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayInNY: @sweetiepie: yessss why the push to train so young? I can't imagine going through the process of potty training for monnnnnnnnnths with constant accidents like some of these moms I know who started training as early as 18 months old. Like pee in the car seat all the time?? Noooo. Also, people were on me to train my eldest before or soon after our second was born (they are 20 months apart) because "so many diapers!" It's so not that big of a deal. Like, at that age they need like 4 changes during the day, if that, and poop maybe 1 time a day. It's really not that inconvenient to me. And at some point our boys started sharing a diaper size and it was so easy. I fully admit my husband and I are just lazy and potty training just sounded like a hard sigh, but our son just made it so easy on us. All we had to do was have all the stuff - stools and potty rings at every bathroom, fun hand soap, cool pull ups and undies, etc. - and when he was ready, he used them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779423 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 10:32:21 +0000 lilyofthewest 2779423@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Different kids are different and different parents have different priorities. Most kids probably can toilet train pretty young if their caregivers put enough work into it. But for some kids that is A LOT of work. Is it worth it?</p> <p>We trained at 26 mos because we were cloth diapering, I was really sick of doing laundry, and we were pretty sure that the 3-day method/oh crap was going to be the way to go for our family. </p> <p>We happened to have a chunk of time where daycare was closed and we were off work when LO was 26mos. Unless we were going to take time off work specifically for potty training, the next opportunity after that would be another 6-7 months and 70 loads of diaper laundry later.</p> <p>He still has a pee accident 1-3x/week (3mos in). He probably would have been at 100% much faster if we waited to train later. But we are doing SO MUCH LESS LAUNDRY!</p> <p>If we used disposables....yeah, potty training would have waited that additional 6-7mos. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779405 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 09:21:01 +0000 JCCovi 2779405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son will be 3 in a January and we’re on our third attempt. He’s been interested since he turned 2 but it just wasn’t happening. This time it’s been amazing though! We used a sticker chart and he’s doing all his pees (except the occasional accident and bedtime) in the potty. He’s a long way away from pooping on the potty consistently. Unfortunately, he’s started trying to clean up his own poo accidents without me. Shudder.</p> <p>My daughter was potty trained at 2 and the processes have been so different. Everyone learns differently and parental patience and discipline have tons to do with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779401 Fri, 13 Oct 2017 09:14:00 +0000 LindsayInNY 2779401@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: Your second sentence is 100% spot on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779336 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 19:13:24 +0000 MuzzyBee 2779336@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My oldest potty trained at 2y 8mo with no issues, completely led by her and has had a handful of accidents since (she is 5)<br /> My youngest is 2y 2mo and won't even sit on a potty - we will leave it up to her - I'm not worried about when she trains..<br /> Anecdotally from my group of friends, the ones that TTd early were still having accidents at 4... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779322 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 17:37:26 +0000 bees_knees 2779322@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS1 was potty trained at 2.5 and did really well. But he was ready and so was I. Honestly, wait until YOU (and DH) are ready to take on the challenge, since you’ll need to be consistent...and that can be exhausting!</p> <p>It’s easier to leave your kid in diapers than try potty training them before they’re ready. I’d much rather change a diaper while we are out and about than change an entire wet (or worse!) outfit :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779306 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 15:37:23 +0000 mrsrain 2779306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did not potty train until after 3. I know a lot of parents push it early, but my experience with children has been if you push it before the child is ready it will just take forever and be a real struggle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779303 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 15:15:53 +0000 SweetiePie 2779303@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn’t read all the responses so apologies if this is repetitive.<br /> But I think for whatever reason the push to potty train has gotten earlier and earlier and now it’s like some weird badge of honor if your kid is fully potty trained by 2.<br /> My son just turned 3 in Sept. We casually offered here and there and read books but I just didn’t care to push it. And my ped was 100% ok with this. She doesn’t “believe” in the 3-day method or forcing. She thinks that res very developmental and it’s extrmely normal for them to not be ready until 3.<br /> AND my ped is much more “cold turkey” about a lot of things - sleep training, dropping feedings, transitioning to cups, getting rid of paci, etc. But potty training is literally the only thing she’s told me to relax about and not force.</p> <p>Right when he turned 3 I became slightly more aggressive. Not fully 3-day method but if he woke up dry (which was almost every night for a couple months, oddly enough) I didn’t put a diaper on until he peed in the potty. And then it just snowballed from there to where he would actually ask to pee in the potty even if he was wearing a diaper. So that’s when I decided to go with underwear. He has had VERY FEW accidents and I really think it’s because we waited until he was older and able to understand (both our explanations and his own body).<br /> He still doesn’t poop in the potty - also assured this was normal at his 3year well visit. She said “if he asks for a diaper to poop, give it to him. Don’t force him to go on the potty because it will stress him which could make him hold it which will make it harder and more painful, and then his association with poop and potty is pain and stress. No one asks when he’s 5 at what age he potty trained. It doesn’t go on a college application. He won’t be wearing diapers to kindergarten. Just relax and when he’s ready, one day he’ll say “I have to poop on the potty”.</p> <p>I offer every time he says he has to poop. I do offer bribe of a big toy if he goes on the potty. If he says no I don’t push it. 1/5 Times he’ll say yes to sitting on the potty to try and poop but then he can’t/won’t and I say that’s ok and give him a diaper. FWIW he only poops once every other day so it’s not like me or school is changing multiple poop diapers. School never has! And I do one every other day. No big deal to me. </p> <p>Anyway, all this to say I’ve been reassured that 1) potty training closer to 3 is normal and 2) poop happening after pee is normal. And neither are bad or something to worry about. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779301 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 15:05:37 +0000 mrskansas 2779301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter was born in April 2015 and she has been potty trained for three months. There are quite a few other kids from my April '15 group that still aren't potty trained though. </p> <p>We just decided one day that we weren't doing diapers anymore and it has been a really smooth process. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779289 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 13:55:54 +0000 PawPrints 2779289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine was April 2015, so 30 months now, and we really only just started training a week ago. I was waiting for her to show sincere interest. She's been super interested in the concept of the potty since around 18 months but it took until now for her to say definitively she wanted to start using it. I'm definitely in the camp that it's better to use less pressure (or none) and wait until the kid is ready to take those steps themselves. I'm kicking myself even now for the fact that DD said to me this morning "I'll go pee on the potty and that will make you happy" and then when no pee came out "Now you are sad or mad that I didn't pee." I really don't want her to think that our approval of her is attached to how she manages her bodily functions. Right now she loves her pull-ups and is peeing on the potty like six times a day at daycare so that's pretty good progress as far as I'm concerned. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779284 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 13:44:58 +0000 skipra 2779284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>2 of my kids are older and the it seems like if you are not consistent with potty training and 100% invested in it, the kids have trouble and do better waiting. We took a few days and said we were doing it and just took the diapers away and after that there were minimal accidents. Going back and forth is confusing for the kids. Why is it ok to sometimes go in the diaper and why are the rules (ie wearing undies) sometimes different? So either stick with it or wait until she is older and can get it faster. Don't worry about the other parents because you are the one dealing with it and it's not a competition. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779278 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 13:35:11 +0000 LindsayInNY 2779278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: Thank you. &lt;3</p> <p>@anagram: Your "trained BUT x, y, z" really is spot on.</p> <p>@Mrs. Champagne: We do M&amp;Ms for pees and she loves it. But that's all it does. Doesn't encourage her in any other way. Have promised her ice cream for poop. She'll talk about it but that's it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779270 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 13:15:41 +0000 Corduroy 2779270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayInNY: My son has a June 2015 birthday. He’s had a potty for a few months and uses it sporadically. He’s nowhere close to potty trained. I’ll wait until he shows interest at daycare or until he starts preschool in June and I have to start paying a non-potty trained fee. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779268 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 13:08:09 +0000 Foodnerd81 2779268@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Champagne: I have a friend with kids the exact ages as mine and she trained a few months before the baby was born. Her daughter had tons of accident- probably normal, but just not anything I wanted to deal with. The kids were probably fully potty trained at around the same time even though she started months before. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779263 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:51:39 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2779263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: i also felt the pressure to train before DD was born. But agree newborn and newly trained toddler sounded horrible so I waited. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779261 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:50:31 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2779261@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friends kids are older (all born the year before, ranging from 7-13 months older then my son). Some were potty trained early (22 months 😵) but most closer to 2.5 or beyond. I felt some pressure (when a friend mentioned her nephew should be trained by now but he was only 2 months older then my son) but just ignored it. </p> <p>My son was really ready a couple months before he turned 3 and it was so easy. He didn't want to poop at first and was dramatic. But it was easy. We just did an hour or so at a time to start. Naked on the bottom. M&amp;ms for a pee. Eventually stretched it longer. Then started taking him out without a diaper. He rarely had accidents and he was truly ready. I don't know/care what my friends thought, tbh! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779257 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:43:32 +0000 Pollywog 2779257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 20 month old walked at 17 months, only says 10 words, didn't eat non-pureed solids until 11 months old, but poops and pees in the potty 80% of the time. Kids develop at different rates. Those kids may be ready, but yours isn't. She'll get there. She won't go to kindergarten in diapers :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779256 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:40:06 +0000 Freckles 2779256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was forced to potty train DS in August because his preschool required that kids be reliably potty trained by the start. He turns 3 in December. He NEVER showed any readiness signs - never wanted to use the potty at daycare, never cared to use the potty at home, etc. The first 3 days were the worst days of our lives (slight exaggeration) but he managed to be potty trained in 2 weeks without too much stress on him. DH was home with him over the summer so it was a lot easier to train him than if we were both working.</p> <p>If it's not a big deal at daycare, i wouldn't really stress about your kid not being potty trained yet - she is still younger than the average potty trained age. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779247 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:02:29 +0000 Anagram 2779247@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayInNY: I think you'll find that by the time these 14 kids are all fully trained, whenever that may be, that there will be a very very wide range of when it happened. And an even wider range if you factor in night time training, poos vs pees, trained except for naps, trained except for public restrooms, trained but still has accidents, etc.</p> <p>I've had two "cohorts" of mommy groups for my 1st and 2nd kiddos, and it seemed like 1 person started training on the early side, and then others jumped in. So both times, it seemed like "everyone was potty training". But in reality, once it was all said and done, the kids were *actually* trained anywhere from when they were newly 2 to now our kids are 4 and there are still 2 who aren't day trained all the way. And half of us, my LO included, still aren't night trained at 4 (And she's been day trained for over 1.5 years).</p> <p>It will vary, trust me. Some people will try to train at 20 months and have immediate success, others will have several starts-and-stops, some won't even try till their kids are older. And some will have kiddos who are resistant who might be late potty trainers. It will run the gamut, I promise.</p> <p>Just like every other milestone (walking, eating, talking). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779246 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 12:02:28 +0000 Foodnerd81 2779246@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt a lot of pressure to train dd1 before her little sister was born, at which point she was almost 2.5. SO many people told me to train her before because I wouldn’t want two in diapers. But I was so tired and grumpy being pregnant I knew I would do a terrible job training anyway plus didn’t want to deal with a newly potty trained kid and a newborn, so we waited. She sort of showed signs of readiness but almost never peed in the potty- like twice, and only once accidentally pooped in the potty. But I knew she would respond well to the 3 day method and I swear it took a day, when she was about 2 3/4 years. Had I just put her in pull-ups I think she would hav happily kept peeing in them. </p> <p>So... each kid is different. I would try not to stress. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779244 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:56:55 +0000 raspberries 2779244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SeptMomma12: My friend was just telling me that when she asks her son when he'll be ready to pee in the potty he tells her "Thursday." So she asked him this morning and told him TODAY is Thursday and he said, "Hmmm... next Thursday." :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779243 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:55:16 +0000 yoursilverlining 2779243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So here are my thoughts and experiences with potty training: IRL and online are very different. On here and other places it seems like the majority potty train very young, where IRL the majority of parents/kids I know didn’t potty training until at least like 3.5 and often 4 years old. My LO’s pre-K room (which was all 4 year olds) had more than 1 kid who wasn’t full potty trained at the start of the year. I dunno, honestly there seems to be this (weird) competition around early potty-training, which I just don’t get. </p> <p>I have also noticed sooooooooooooooo many parents who are like “we potty trained my almost 2 year old and it only took 8 months to pee train!” If it takes that long, I have a hard time saying that was successful “potty training”; that’s just subjecting yourself to torture for months on end for no reason. </p> <p>It’s hard to judge “potty interest” signals too, I think. I think a lot of times we as parents forget that our kids are interested in EVERYTHING that we do – which includes the potty. Why are we going into the other room? Why is the door closed? What are we doing in there? Kids want to emulate. That’s totally normal but doesn’t necessarily mean they are really ready.</p> <p>All to say: don't worry about it. Every kid is different. They all get there in the end. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779237 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:44:56 +0000 Alba4 2779237@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We didn't start training DS until he was 3. It was a bumping few months. Try not to stress. Everyone eventually gets there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779236 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:40:54 +0000 Peasinapod 2779236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We potty trained at 34 months and it was the easiest thing ever. Maybe 3 accidents, no fights... she's just over 3 now and still often poops in her pull up at bedtime but I'm okay with that. I think if you wait long enough it can be a very stress free experience. The stay at home moms in my area all seemed to potty train around 3. I think in a day care setting it might be easier earlier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779233 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:35:52 +0000 Portboston 2779233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS is 27 months and NOWHERE NEAR potty training. He’s peed on the potty ONCE and refuses to sit on it again. I’m not pressing the issue. He’ll train when he’s ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/stressed-about-potty-training#post-2779226 Thu, 12 Oct 2017 11:12:03 +0000 SeptMomma12 2779226@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayInNY: My daughter is May 2015 and you're light years ahead of us, so it's all relative :silly: She finally started sitting on the potty about a month ago, after months of refusal, but has still never actually peed in it. She tells me "I'm not letting the pee out now. Maybe in a few weeks." And this is with an older brother who she copies in every area of life except this one sitting there encouraging her! No advice other than if I've learned anything about little girls thus far, or at least my own stubborn little girl, it's that they will not do anything until they're ready, as frustrating as it might be! </p>