https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 24 Apr 2026 02:02:04 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn/page/2#post-1334401 Fri, 10 Jan 2014 03:09:10 +0000 lamariniere 1334401@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I could have written this with my son. Do not beat yourself up. Breastfeeding is the hardest thing I have ever done. It was SO incredibly painful for me the first 12 weeks. We had both of DS's frenulums clipped and it didn't help. I saw LCs multiple times, tried all sorts of remedies and it was really just time that helped. I honestly think that part of it was that DS had a very small mouth that he couldn't open big enough in order to latch properly. Definitely get some APNO for your nips, it worked wonders for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn/page/2#post-1334268 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 23:49:59 +0000 Navy_Mommy 1334268@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>First of all - you're doing great!</p> <p>Second, I didn't read all the responses but here's my nipple advice...</p> <p>Be topless as much as possible. Shut the shades, and air those puppies out. If you can hand express at all (even the tiniest amount) do that, rub it on your nipples and let it air dry.</p> <p>Earth Mama Angel Baby Nipple Butter. That stuff is the bomb. Slather it all over your nipples. (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Earth-Mama-Angel-Baby-Natural/dp/B000JVCBBG" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/Earth-Mama-Angel-Baby-Natural/dp/B000JVCBBG</a>)</p> <p>If your nipples are cracked, they're going to hurt - so you need to focus on getting them to heal. Once they're healed it's normal to have "latch pain" in the beginning (sharp pain that only lasts about 15 seconds) but anything longer than that is NOT normal and means there's a latch problem.</p> <p>Has your milk fully come in? Has your daughter been checked for tongue and lip ties? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn/page/2#post-1334232 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 23:36:11 +0000 Maysprout 1334232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Best Wishes!<br /> Lots of lanolin worked for me. Before/after showering, before/after nursing, just all the time.<br /> And put those gel ice packs in your bra after nursing. Hope you heal up soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn/page/2#post-1334024 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 22:22:59 +0000 scotchbonnet 1334024@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Please give yourself permission to pump, bottle feed, use nipple shields, anything to give your nipples break to heal. I was like you in the beginning, and was so scared that doing any of those things would cause baby to lose interest in breastfeeding. I was very wrong and suffered needlessly for 7 weeks. Turned out lo had a posterior tongue tie and that is why the latch "seemed" fine but there was still significant trauma to my nipples. So you might also want to have her checked for a tongue tie.<br /> Hang in there mama. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn/page/2#post-1333955 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 22:05:05 +0000 Ree723 1333955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamadee: Yes to using hand expressed milk as well, I forgot about that! I'd always squeeze a few extra drops at the end of a feed and rub it in - people aren't exaggerating when they say breast milk is a magic cure all! That worked 100000x better than Lanolin! Thanks for reminding me, I had forgotten that little trick! @vegmama: try it, I swear it works wonders, and then let your boobs air dry afterwards for a little while. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333939 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 22:02:10 +0000 Sparkler 1333939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are in the exact position I was and I remember feeling so defeated. Get some shields until you heal! Gel pads that you can keep cool between use! The little plastic dome things to keep your nipples dry helped too. I found pumping exacerbated the problem and was depressing. You are doing great and even if it doesn't work, your baby will be perfect. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333723 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 21:20:19 +0000 Greentea 1333723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sandy: I second that it was the most mentally and physically difficult thing of my life. And I had a long and excruciating back labor unmedicated!</p> <p>I spent months on labor classes... that was one day! Breastfeeding was continuous! One other thing no one told me: the baby has to learn! More so than even you! LO didn't know to open wide and she had to be crying to be open enough and that in itself was stressful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333666 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 21:12:09 +0000 Mamadee 1333666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's okay!! My lo had a tongue tie so his latch was awful even after we got it clipped. Our nursing relationship was saved because of breast shells, a properly fitted nipple shield and a double breast pump. Don't feel like a failure. It took us 7 weeks to finally lose the shield and then it was smooth sailing. </p> <p>Personally I hated lanolin, I just used expressed breast milk on my torn up nipples. </p> <p>Also, I gave my baby formula in the beginning too because I was starting to resent him and breastfeeding. We are at 6 months now and EBF. YOU can do it mama! You do what is best for you and lo and that's it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333634 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 21:07:10 +0000 QueensBee 1333634@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh gosh, those first few weeks were PAINFUL! You are definitely not alone and you can do it!</p> <p>Personally, I had to pump and give a bottle at least once a day so that I could give my cracked and bloody nipples a break. Once or twice I gave a few ounces of formula when it hurt too much to even use the pump. They say that bottles can interfere with breastfeeding but honestly, they are what saved us. I also rinsed my nipples gently with antibactierial soap to avoid infection, slathered them with coconut and olive oil, and let them air out a lot. </p> <p>I think you just do whatever it is you need to do to get through each feeding (whether it's a bottle, a nipple shield, a break) and know that it WILL get easier in a few weeks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333576 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 21:00:19 +0000 Greentea 1333576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Vegmama: you are doing GREAT you are doing GREAT you are doing GREAT! When I started breastfeeding I did not find the support I needed (I was not on hellobee!). The LCs and nurses did nothing to help me and I was intimidated to reach out to le leche. Honestly I cried my way through it a lot. It is the second most painful thing I have ever done aside from labor. Let me tell you: no one no one no one ever told me! If someone had told me how painful frustrating and life changing and stressful it would be I would have been more mentally prepared. </p> <p>I took all these classes for labor day and my one breastfeeding class did zip to prepare me. I wanted to start an organization called, "breastfeeding is kind of a nightmare but it is worth it" to give people like me who HATED it but were determined to persevere a place to turn for support. I felt like no one would understand. Especially not a place that was pro-breastfeeding like le leche (though now rationally I am sure they might...), just what I was going through. I hated it it hurt and tbere was no way I was not going to do it! In that way I think it is on par with unmedicated labor... decide beforehand because why WOULD you not take the drugs in this day and age? I was determined to breastfeed no matter WHAT and that is the only reason I made it through. (Through to this time at 7 months when I love it!)</p> <p>I was a hellobee lurker and I read one post where someone said they loved breastfeeding and I thought they were absolutely off the deep end. They just had an older baby!</p> <p>Along the way I found glimmers of hope... a random doc that said "a LOT of first time moms struggle with it" or the ped nurse that said "at first it is painful and frustrating"...THANK YOU people. Thank you. All I ever heard was "it shouldn't hurt blah blah bullshit." (I am passionate about this.) </p> <p>I can honestly say I love it now and I never ever thought I would say it. It was the hardest second most painful thing I have ever done and the most rewarding and charming and beautiful thing I have ever done. I am just trying to offer some support and let you know I know how awful it can be and how amazing it will be. Persevere! And know that few things have such highs and lows as breast feeding (if anything does!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333530 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:54:37 +0000 maybebaby 1333530@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs, I've been exactly where you are. My nipples were cracked and bleeding and I was a mess. We supplemented with formula for a month while I did everything I could to establish supply and let my nipples heal. I fed him about half the time (nipple shield for 9 weeks), Applied APNO and pumped. From 4 weeks to 6 months he was EBF and now he gets a bottle of formula a day. I mourned my wish to EBF for a year, but my sanity has been spared by giving myself a break.</p> <p>Once BFing was well established around 9 weeks it was soooo much easier and not at all painful. Congrats on your sweet baby! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333500 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:50:53 +0000 Mrs Spoon 1333500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hang in there! The first few weeks are def the hardest!! My LC had me use Neosporin on my nipples after each feeding. This also helped prevent infection and helped them heal once they were damaged. Once they healed and LO was latching better, it was do much easier and pain free. Good luck and take care of yourself mama. This time is very draining but so worth it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333427 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:41:14 +0000 catlady 1333427@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You can do it! The first few weeks are the hardest but it definitely gets easier. My nipples were cracked and bloody in the first week or two. I used tons of Motherlove nipple cream in those early days (found it on amazon). Not a miracle product but it definitely helped alot. Within only a couple weeks, my nipples got used to it, she got better at latching, and nursing was pretty much pain free! We've been going strong ever since. </p> <p>Definitely see another LC though if she has a poor latch. That will help you a ton. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333396 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:35:34 +0000 immabeetoo 1333396@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Seconding APNO and the gel pads (refrigerate them!). I promise it will get better, you're not a failure, and hormones are making everything worse. Hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333346 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:27:41 +0000 Anutka 1333346@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are doing great!!<br /> Not sure if you know this site or have any time/energy to watch these, but I found these videos helpful to figure out what a good latch should be.<br /> <a href="http://www.breastfeedinginc.ca/content.php?pagename=videos" rel="nofollow">http://www.breastfeedinginc.ca/content.php?pagename=videos</a><br /> If you are able to, try another LC.<br /> Good luck, you got this!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333274 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:19:24 +0000 mrs. wagon 1333274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will join all the others in letting you know that you're not alone!! My nipples didn't even bleed that much and I cried every nursing session for a long, long time. Someone would bring me the baby and I would cry "no!!!" :( I wish I had seen a lactation consultant or asked for help earlier. It will definitely get better. If you need to take a break don't feel badly about it.. You can always try again tomorrow or even in a few hours. And I second the lanolin. It helped me so much. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333223 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 20:14:27 +0000 MrsStar 1333223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm another to recommend a nipple shield. I used one because my nipples hurt so much and I dreaded feeding her because of how gross they were, a nipple shield was used for a few weeks while they healed and then we weaned off it. You are doing a great job though, hope you get some relief soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1333108 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 19:56:14 +0000 MrsH 1333108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are doing awesome! The ladies above have given great ideas! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332787 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 19:13:39 +0000 regberadaisy 1332787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is there another LC you can switch to? I really don't think BFing should be painful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332723 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 19:02:47 +0000 sandy 1332723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Vegmama: hang in there! I have to second everything @Ree723 said. It is so incredibly painful...breast feeding in the beginning was probably the most physically and mentally difficult experience of my life...it definitely wears on you being sleep deprived and have PP hormones and not really getting a break from it. But just like @Ree723 said, somehow the pain starts to not be as bad around 2-3 weeks...it really magically lessens...for me it was one side was not as painful and then a few weeks later the other side wasn't as painful and by 3 months it was definitely pain free. It was so so so so tough that I can completely understand why some people choose to stop breast feeding...but I will say I was so happy to have gotten through the painful first few weeks bc it was so easy after that - no bottles to wash, no formula to buy or mix or pack with you...it's so easy traveling bc all you need is your boobs. Just know that it's so incredibly tough the first few weeks...hang in there and absolutely no judgment however you decide you want to feed your baby </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332705 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:57:07 +0000 jedeve 1332705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>APNO! The prescription stuff!</p> <p>Honestly I wish I had pumped more early on. Save some heartache. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332685 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:54:26 +0000 Mrs.Someone 1332685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry to hear you're having a rough time. You can do it though! Maybe try a different lactation consultant if this one doesn't seem to be helping? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332673 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:53:08 +0000 Lindsay05 1332673@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aww sorry to hear :( the first few weeks are really difficult. What seemed to work best for me was sit in an epsom salt bath and try and soak my nipples in it. Good luck and try and hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332582 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:37:28 +0000 T.H.O.U. 1332582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This was exactly my experience. I nursed one sir and pumped the other until I could heal. After a week or so I get healed I was able to BF fine and we had a great relationship for 18 months. Take care of yourself! R </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332573 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:36:19 +0000 prettylizy 1332573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You've got lots of great advice up there from PP's but I just want to throw in on day 5pp you're hormones are all over the map and it's hard to think straight if everything is going perfectly according to the textbook. Throw a difficult nursing situation and super pain in your nipples and you're just a super storm of emotions. Hang in there mama, it does get better I promise! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332534 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:29:42 +0000 PurplePeony 1332534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs -- I understand what you're going through. Have you confirmed that your LO doesn't have tongue or lip ties? We saw a LC a few days after my DD was born but after a couple weeks, things still aren't right (including difficulty maintaining a proper latch and nipple pain, though not nearly as bad as yours). Through some HB searches, I started to suspect some sort of tie and, sure enough, when I checked her upper lip, it looks to me like a classic tie. Our LC confirmed she had only checked the bottom so we're going to have it evaluated tomorrow to see if my suspicions are correct. Anyway, it's just an idea but maybe make sure your LO was thoroughly checked? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332488 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:21:44 +0000 MamaBehr 1332488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Vegmama: It will get better, and your nipples will heal. I agree that a nipple shield will help (I'm using one, even though I really didn't want to) and these things help too:<br /> <a href="http://www.diapers.com/p/medela-softshells-sore-nipples-kit-309952" rel="nofollow">http://www.diapers.com/p/medela-softshells-sore-nipples-kit-309952</a><br /> I got these from my lactation consultant to help with my nipples healing. And it does help a LOT! </p> <p>And for what it is worth, this is my third baby and third time nursing and it is just as hard as the first time (and to top it all off we are having a weight gain issue, just like I did with DS#1 ugh). If you push through it will get easier, and if you decide to quit or just pump full time that is great too! Don't feel bad if things don't go according to plan :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332442 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:14:01 +0000 hilsy85 1332442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry hun! The first few weeks are brutal...if your nipples are really torn up, I would make sure to have her evaluated for a tongue/lip tie (including posterior ties, which are not always obvious). Also, using All purpose nipple cream (APNO) helped me heal SO fast. Your OB can write a prescription but it needs to be filled at a compounding pharmacy. Hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332440 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:13:34 +0000 Ree723 1332440@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hang in there and don't feel any guilt about what you need to do to take care of yourself and your baby! No one ever talks about how freakin' painful breastfeeding is at the start. Everything you read says it shouldn't hurt if you're doing it right but that's a load of bollocks. It DOES hurt for the first few weeks as your nipples need to toughen up, and I think anyone who says otherwise has selective memory loss :-)</p> <p>For me, I stopped getting the toe curling, eyes watering, grimacing in pain feeling every time she latched on around two or three weeks. There was nothing wrong with LO's latch, it just takes a while to toughen up. I used lanolin after every feeding and kept my bra off for a good 20 minutes after feeding, just to expose them to air, which helped a lot! Time is really the answer here but honestly, if you need to explore other options, by all means do so! Hugs... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-physically-amp-mentally-with-breastfeeding-our-newborn#post-1332405 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:03:46 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 1332405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Gel pads are best for really torn up nipples. Seriously they are how I bounced back from LO puncturing mine when he got teeth and decided to use them :-( Lanolin is great but more for minor soreness in my experience.</p> <p>Breathe! If you need to get shields, do a little formula feeding or pump a bit, do it! So many of us had a hard time in the beginning. It does get better! </p>