https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 02 Jun 2026 17:33:07 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2600011 Sat, 06 Aug 2016 21:05:36 +0000 rockinghorse 2600011@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>At 11 weeks we started a gentle kind of sleep training after I read the book "Sleeping Through the Night". </p> <p>For bedtime (in a nutshell) we put her to bed between 6:30 and 7:30 when she starts showing signs of get tired. We try to limit any naps after 5 (try is the key word here, naps are not our strong point). </p> <p>We do our bedtime routine (dim lights, white noise, change diaper and into pj's, read a book, and then put her in her Merlin suit in her crib with her wub a nub, kiss goodnight, leave), and if she fusses I wait as long as I want (usually about 30 seconds :silly: but a little longer would probably be better), go in and say "it's OK" and pat her (no picking up or staying long), then walk out. I do this over and over until she sleeps.</p> <p>The first 2 nights it took about 45 min, now she either falls asleep on her own with no fussing or I have to go in maybe 3 times. It is great! I have time to get stuff done! Now I just need to work on STTN and naps. :shocked: </p> <p>The book has more info and troubleshooting. It made me feel better having the book to reference, and it has stuff for older kids too. The main idea is teaching the baby to self soothe. </p> <p>IDK if that helps at all :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2597562 Wed, 03 Aug 2016 09:01:59 +0000 SweetiePie 2597562@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@csross217: oh and I would agree that 2 hours is too long of awake time at that age. It really is super confusing, it seems like a nap right before the bedtime is counterintuitive, but at that age for sure sleep begets sleep. I would try putting her down 1-1.5 hours after the last nap with a bedtime routine. It may take a few days but I think you'll get there since she goes down for naps drowsy but awake. Just be consistent. The easiest thing to do is give in and hold her and go back to the old way, but if that isn't working for you anymore (as in its not sustainable) I promise it pays off to stick to your guns! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2597555 Wed, 03 Aug 2016 08:53:08 +0000 SweetiePie 2597555@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@csross217: yeah that's exactly what my ped said. Everyone universally accepts that witching hours just happen and it's part of the deal. But it's actually related to being tired and people don't realize it...because they're always told it's just a phase they all go through. There's a reason why they are all cranky at the end of the day...they're tired! (That's what my ped said).<br /> I can honestly say we never had a witching hour because we always put him to bed early and did the catnap around 5. But of course I can't say that everyone should and can have the same experience. My son has always loved sleep, I just had to make sure he was getting it by putting him down in time, he likes dark and white noise so we had to be in his room, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2597508 Wed, 03 Aug 2016 07:39:05 +0000 csross217 2597508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pachamama: Napping has been hit or miss. Some days she'll take 1-2 hour naps, and other days it's all 30 minutes...</p> <p>@looch: She's usually awake for 1.5 to 2 hours in the evening before falling asleep with us on the couch around 7:30. I know that's probably too long for her to be awake and she gets pretty grumpy but I haven't quite figured out how to put her down earlier.... baby sleep is so confusing for me!</p> <p>@SweetiePie: I hadn't really thought about the witching hour being because she was overtired. She tends to be very cranky in the evenings and everyone just said it was normal and all babies are cranky at that time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596860 Tue, 02 Aug 2016 07:07:09 +0000 looch 2596860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son frontloaded on night sleep, his best stretch was between 7 and 11 pm, so I would say that's your child's true bedtime.</p> <p>How long is she awake from the last nap of the day, it is possible that she has too much awake time and that's causing difficulties falling asleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596847 Tue, 02 Aug 2016 06:47:37 +0000 pachamama 2596847@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@csross217: three and a half months is about when we started our bedtime of 7:30 actually.. like you said, we thought it was a nap but I think it was his self designated bedtime. Maybe have her nap but no later than 4? Is she napping pretty well during the day? Sometimes it's just a struggle until they figure out how to sleep. It will get better..,<br /> Getting my son to bed with a pacifier, swaddling, all the shenanigans was quite the operation until he started solids. At 6 months he goes down without a fight in his crib and sleeps all night. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596728 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 19:57:52 +0000 mamabolt 2596728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are in a similar place. LO will often fall asleep around 8 but if I put him in bed then he's up 20 min later. After 9/9:30 though he'll stay down for hours. He's four months this week. I've just been waiting out the 4 month sleep regression and then maybe we'll get more serious about bedtime. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596709 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 19:30:20 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2596709@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We used to do that only she would usually nap in her crib or a little bassinet while I napped on the couch or in bed, but she did wake up on her own like it was a nap. Around that age we pushed bedtime earlier to around 8 and stuck with that for a few months. Maybe she isn't ready to go to bed that early yet. We only knew to switch bedtime earlier than the 10-11 we were doing because she was getting grumpy earlier in the evening. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596689 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 18:49:12 +0000 gingerbebe 2596689@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Both my boys have had a 730pm bedtime (give or take 30 minutes) since very early on. So the time doesn't seem that off to me. It just sounds like she's used to being held to sleep at that time. I'd probably try just putting her down a little earlier like 7pm and just keep getting her to work on the drowsy but awake thing for that sleep and just go in an comfort her every few minutes until she gets the message. It may take a few days but she should transition fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596652 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 17:22:19 +0000 SweetiePie 2596652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with above that it might be that she's fighting it because she's over tired which is making it harder for her to fall asleep on her own.<br /> If you are interested, most of the sleep specialists that Pediatricians recommend say the ideal bedtime for that age is between 5 &amp; 7pm. (Which is why so many people report a witching hour between those times, it's actually the baby being overtired and ready for bed).<br /> At that age we did a catnap and feed around 5/5:30. He woke around 6/6:30, we did bath, bedtime routine, final feed and he was in bed between 6:30&amp;7. It was great because he was never overtired which meant easier bedtime and (in my opinion) better nighttime sleep. And it was SO nice for my husband and I to get that time back to ourselves. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596638 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 16:59:36 +0000 catomd00 2596638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are certain she's tired by 7:30 and she's fighting it, then I'd try an earlier bedtime. If the issue is she can't fall asleep on her own, then I'd just do what it takes to get her asleep and worry about potential bad habits of and when they happen. At 4 months, DD1 naturally shifted her bedtime closer to 8 pm.DD2 is 10 weeks and the past week has started shifting her bedtime to around 8/8:30. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596614 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 16:11:36 +0000 csross217 2596614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugsmama: I guess I'm more concerned that she should be in her own bed. We love snuggling her but I'm worried about forming bad habits. The whole sleep thing stresses me out pretty badly! She goes to sleep on her own really well for naps and I had always heard that bedtime was harder.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596602 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 15:47:13 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2596602@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is it bothering you more that you feel like she should be in bed? Or is it a pain to keep her with you until you go to bed? I feel like there is a good chance things will be changing soon with your LO anyways, if I were you I would stick with the most painless stress free sleep pattern until I am sure the 4m sleep regression isn't about to hit. Things change so quickly around this time, I would just attempt to start a loose bedtime routine and be flexible to avoid stressing yourself out. The way you described your current routine sounds pretty good to me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596597 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 15:45:39 +0000 Mrsbells 2596597@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@csross217: At that age its pretty typical that they struggle to fall asleep on their own. My LO was not able to fall asleep on her own at that age and we tried everything in the book. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596594 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 15:41:21 +0000 Mrs D 2596594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We kind of do the same thing...DD is 4.5 mos old (almost 5 actually) and we "put her to bed" in the swing every night at 7/730...then at 10 I take her upstairs and she gets her bottle and goes in her crib...</p> <p>For me...its fear of being able to go from 730-6am with just that bottle...</p> <p>With DD1...we continued this process until she was probably 8 mos old...of course her meals before that varied (now she nurses right before the swing...but once she starts cereal next month she might not anymore). I had just gotten so accustomed to no MOTN feedings that I was afraid to move her 10pm bottle any earlier... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/struggling-with-bedtime-at-35-months#post-2596576 Mon, 01 Aug 2016 15:05:29 +0000 csross217 2596576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since Baby E was a few weeks old she has been taking a 7:30 pm "nap" with us on the couch and we would just wake her and take her upstairs whenever we ended up going to bed. I finally realized that this must actually be her true bedtime, since she never wakes on her own and gets pissed when we wake her to go up to the nursery. After eating she falls dead asleep again for at least 4 hours.</p> <p>The last few nights we've been trying to put her down to sleep in her crib at 7:30, and she will not have it! I follow the same routine I do when we put her to bed at 9, but she fights sleep like crazy. She cries, kicks, fights her swaddle, refuses pacifier, etc. until we give up and just bring her downstairs with us. By the time we are able to soothe her to sleep, it is almost 9 anyway.... I don't get it, she goes down drowsy but awake for naps no problem.</p> <p>I guess my question is - what is a normal bedtime for a 3 month old? I just don't know whether we should continue trying to put her down at 7:30 when she's obviously tired or keep doing this weird evening nap thing? Did we create a monster by letting her fall asleep on us for 3 months? </p>