https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 06 Apr 2026 04:09:23 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833355 Wed, 11 Jul 2018 11:40:01 +0000 gestalt 2833355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@castilrm: Glad to hear things went better today. Honestly, i've seen some *screaming* kids, especially if the parents are in their sight line. Keep doing what you're doing and it'll eventually get better! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833195 Tue, 10 Jul 2018 13:27:15 +0000 castilrm 2833195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Whew, so thankfully today (lesson no 2) was much better. She burst into tears when she first saw the pool but the instructor made it more fun and less trying to push her to listen to instruction. My husband stayed out of sight and that was also helpful. By the end she was willingly getting her head wet (not dunking but having fun slashing around with a toy) and kicking while holding the teacher. Fingers crossed but at least she had fun today and after the initial upset, she was pretty happy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833119 Tue, 10 Jul 2018 09:03:47 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2833119@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is also very tentative and shy and tends to be a perfectionist, getting frustrated easily. We just finished our first session of non parent assisted swim classes. We did low ratio so just 2 other boys and the instructor. What seemed to work was talking it up A LOT: ‘you’re such a big kid you get to go in without mama! Your teacher will help you and we are so proud because you’re being so brave!’ Etc. We did this every Friday night before class on Saturday morning and on the way to the class. It took 2-3 sessions for him to go to the instructor easily where he didn’t look miserable the entire time but by the end of 10 sessions he LOVED it and looked forward to going. I would stick with it for sure and be out of sight. You could also try for next time just a couple other kids and see if the peer pressure is helpful to go along with it. More than 2 or 3 kids is hard but I found it was a great ratio for my son. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833090 Tue, 10 Jul 2018 07:16:12 +0000 hilary 2833090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3 year old twins really struggled as well. Our instructor also said if we took them to open swim and pushed the envelope and had the kids do stuff that the teachers would ask (force them to float on back assisted, put face in water, etc) that they'd adjust quicker since our kids already trust us. It made for some stressful open swims at first but they started to love lessons so worth the effort to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833045 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 21:19:18 +0000 QueensBee 2833045@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@castilrm: I can totally relate- to both your experience as a child and as a parent!</p> <p>For years, my very stubborn son fought any type of swim lessons. He either flipped out or refused to participate in them. He was legitimately terrified of being in the pool with a stranger. Eventually, we got tired of wasting time and money on them and took a break for a few years. </p> <p>Now, at five years old, he seems ready. We signed him up for private lessons at a small, quiet pool. On the first day, I asked the instructor to "just make it fun for him." The instructor spent the half hour playing games, being silly, and taking it easy. My son had a blast and learned to trust him. Today was our second lesson there and he happily hopped in the pool without me and was able to actually start learning some skills. </p> <p>All this to say- it might be worth asking them to keep the next lesson very laid back and fun? That's what worked for us! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833032 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 20:47:20 +0000 lamariniere 2833032@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@misolee: totally agree about your swim lesson advice. Power through and keep parents out of sight. </p> <p>My 4yo, who is very shy and clingy, started private swim lessons last week. We were supposed to have a 5 day intensive course, but had to cancel 2 lessons due to heavy rain. We’re going to continue the lessons in August. I’m in the pool with my LOs because the lessons are at our apartment, but I stay on the other end of the pool with my 2nd LO while the first one is having lessons. It’s a large enough pool that she can’t see or hear me when she’s with the instructor. And seeing her progress has been amazing. She’s only had 3 lessons so far, but I’m confident that she could get to safety if she accidentally fell into the pool. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2833024 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 20:28:17 +0000 MamaCate 2833024@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@castilrm: can you ask her what you could do to help her? Maybe remind her why she wants to swim (“I know you want to learn to swim so you can have fun with us in the pool” or whatever) and ask how you can help her.</p> <p>My little guy is 3 this week and we just started weekly group lessons in the last month. He cried, was happy, cried and then was happy the last two weeks. I asked him how I could help him have fun and he told me I should tell him to “try my best” and “put swimming powers in my muscles”. 😛 I definitely wouldn’t have come up with that on my own! At this age I think you could at least see if she can help you problem solve together? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832964 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 17:06:26 +0000 MamaBear87 2832964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter screamed through every lesson last summer. She's strong willed and I think it became a if I scream enough I won't have to do this anymore. This summer she screamed the first lesson and now enjoys them greatly. </p> <p>We have a pool and she's been in since 6 months or so and always has fun with us. I think nearly every kid goes through this with lessons so I wouldn't pull her. She'll get used to it and they will be fun </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832959 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 16:42:34 +0000 misolee 2832959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I say power through it. I think because it's not once a week but daily, it will be much better for her in the long run. I would 100% adhere to the no parents in sight rule because that also helps immensely.</p> <p>My daughter started swim lessons at 4 and we didn't have major issues but the once a week format took her forever to get used to the actual class and swimming. We did like a clinic for 5 days straight and then it finally clicked for her bc of muscle memory and for doing it repeatedly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832957 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 16:36:11 +0000 erinbaderin 2832957@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wonder if in the next class, just for the one session, she could not put her head under? My son has been in swimming basically since he was born and he still doesn’t really want to put his head under. It seems like a lot for a first class, I would have thought they’d start with blowing bubbles, putting their face in, etc. That’s kind of a compromise - she still goes back, but you ease up, temporarily, on the thing that seemed to most upset her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832953 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 16:16:40 +0000 castilrm 2832953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're going to stick out the 8 class sessions and hope for continued improvement. I think she definitely likes seeing how other kids are doing (at least this has been the case in dance classes), so I think after these sessions, I want to stick with small group classes. We were hoping the "crash course" one on one with a teacher would give her some basics so she'd feel confident in a class setting....hopefully that plans works, we'll see. Generally, she's a kid that likes to know that she's going to do something well before she tries it in front of others, so I thought this would work well for her. Fingers crossed that each day is a little easier.....not screaming for 30 minutes would obviously be an improvement. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832950 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 16:00:13 +0000 Mrs. Starfish 2832950@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are so not alone! Our girls have been in swim class since they were 7 months old but at 2 years, they were recently moved up to classes without us in the pool. Even though they used to LOVE class, they currently HATE it and they cry a lot. A lot, a lot. </p> <p>We were given similar advice as others: 1) this is normal, so don't feel bad at all, 2) get out of your child's field of vision. (I go get a cup of coffee from the counter and watch them from the other side of the swim center.)</p> <p>We were told that it would take at least a month of weekly lessons before they would be comfortable, but I'll tell you that it's now been a month and we're still not there. Still, it's slowly getting better and I'm feeling hopeful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832936 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:39:03 +0000 snowjewelz 2832936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Most of the swim schools I know of, parents are in another room with the one way view mirrors so you can see them but they can't see you.</p> <p>I have a sensitive-ish 3.5 year old and honestly only this summer she told me she wants swim lessons. Before she had always explicitly said she didn't want to if I wasn't in the water with her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832931 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:35:11 +0000 kiddosc 2832931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I did lessons as a kid the parents weren't allowed in the pool area at all, it definitely makes a difference. I also think that the peer pressure of trying to keep up with other kids is beneficial in swim lessons. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832927 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:30:19 +0000 castilrm 2832927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you for your responses! I'm glad to hear this is normal....we'll try to hide out for a couple lessons and see if that helps. That helped with her attending daycare/preschool - if she can see us, she gets upset. But is great when she's on her own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832922 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:21:48 +0000 BadgerMom 2832922@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh man, I totally feel your pain. We’ve had months now ofvarrying degrees of miserable swim lessons. I finally decided to “go to the bathroom” two lessons ago and again last lessons and he has done SOOOOO much better. No whining/crying and even going under water! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832919 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:16:29 +0000 Madison43 2832919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My kiddo was newly 3 when we started swim lessons. She had nothing but positive pool experiences and still absolutely freaked out her first few lessons. I got the same advice you did, go wait in the hall where she can’t see you, and I spent an entire swim<br /> semester waiting outside the pool during our weekly lessons. Honesty, after the first few times, she was completely fine as long as she couldn’t see me, but would cry if she spotted me. After that semester, she was perfectly fine with lessons and I now watch her from the stands with the other parents. :grin: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/swim-lessonsfear#post-2832917 Mon, 09 Jul 2018 15:09:00 +0000 castilrm 2832917@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi all! We started our 3 year old in swim lessons today and it went pretty badly. We decided to do private lessons which go 4 days in a row, break for the weekend, and then another 4 days in a row. The consecutive days are supposed to help support muscle memory, and we thought she'd like the solo classes since she sometimes gets a little shy in large classes and usually likes having a teacher's attention.</p> <p>She hasn't had a ton of water time, but our time in the pool has always been fun and positive so while we expected some fear and nerves, this was pretty extreme today. Her dad attended the lessons with her and he sat on the side of the pool while she got in with the instructor. She was pretty nervous but things went really downhill after she put her head under water - she then spent the next 20 minutes screaming for her dad. </p> <p>The instructor said that while she was a little more upset than the average first time kid in the water, it wasn't out of the ordinary and that he thinks she'll improve with each lesson. The next step is for my husband to stay out of view so she can't panic and call for him. We have our doubts that this will help b/c she was so upset today, but we know that you have to push through in order for kids to embrace new experiences.</p> <p>Any suggestions on how to make this more enjoyable and less traumatizing for her? I don't want to make this into a phobia for her but at the same time, I was a fearful kid and my parents pulled me out of lessons anytime I cried. I'm sure I was happy about that as a kid, but as an adult, I'm a weak swimmer and I wish I had had more experience in sports and dance as a kid. I don't want to set her up for similar deficiencies....<br /> Thank you! </p>