https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 17 May 2026 11:23:14 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2612460 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 08:27:50 +0000 Alivoo01 2612460@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p><b>1st one:<br /> How far along were you?</b> 4/5 weeks?<br /> <b>How was it physically?</b> Not bad at all. No major cramps or pain.<br /> <b>How long did you grieve?</b> For awhile! I was probably "depressed" for about a week. Thank goodness for a strong and supportive hubby to make sure I ate!<br /> <b>Did you wait to TTC?</b> Nope. We got back on the TTC train once I was done grieving.<br /> <b>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies?</b>YES!! I kept worrying and anticipating something going wrong once I did stay pregnant, like waiting for the other shoe to drop. Thankfully, DS was healthy!</p> <p><b>2nd one:<br /> How far along were you?</b> 10 weeks<br /> <b>How was it physically?</b> D&amp;C was pain-free and super quick. Had a lot of on-and-off cramping. One evening was particularly bad and passed quite a few large clots for about 30 minutes which resulted in an ER visit.<br /> <b>How long did you grieve?</b> A couple days. We discovered the baby wasn't growing at our 8 week appt so I had almost 3 weeks to mentally prepare myself. Given our prior loss, I'm always skeptical. Not saying it's any easier, but I was more stable vs my 1st loss.<br /> <b>Did you wait to TTC?</b> OB told us to wait a cycle so we did, but once we got the all clear, we were on it!<br /> <b>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies?</b> Yup! Crazy amounts of worry during my entire pregnancy. We have 2 now, but are contemplating a 3rd. The likelihood of us miscarrying again is probably high given our history so it's something I need to mentally prepare for and willing to endure if we decide to conceive again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2612403 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 00:35:28 +0000 JennRimbey 2612403@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>After #4 I grieved for over a month. Leaving the house was painful </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2612402 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 00:33:52 +0000 JennRimbey 2612402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>*everything not evert hinges </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2612401 Mon, 29 Aug 2016 00:32:03 +0000 JennRimbey 2612401@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've had 4 in a year, and i believe tonight is the beginning of the end for number 5.<br /> #1- August 2015, I didn't know I was pregnant because my "period" came on time but the pain was intense.<br /> #2 we got pregnant on our first aniversary. Positive test, but again, period came on time. Lots of clots and cramps. I was sad but hopeful for the next cycle.<br /> #3 same thing again, very depressed we skipped the next cycle to rest.<br /> #4 much stronger symptoms, 3 days late and lots of positives. At this point my husband and mom were not believing that I was pregnant which made me feel very alone. I was frantically trying to get in to my naturopathic doctor and talking with a homeopathic online. I tried progesterone that same day but of course that was too late. This was by far the most physically painful one. I had to see the baby for myself. I did get to see it. Seeing it was validating but devastating. My body was in crisis I was very ill. 3 in a row took evert hinges out of me physically and emotionally. We decided to wait til January and give me some time to heal and maybe figure out what's wrong. Apparently I am super fertile and avoiding is much harder than I thought it would be.<br /> Right this minute I'm pregnant, 13dpo and spotting. I'm trying to trust God's wisdom, but I will admit that I am very disappointed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2582065 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 23:33:51 +0000 stiletto_mom 2582065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 7-ish weeks. No idea when baby stopped growing or even if it was a blighted ovum. Found out because HCG levels were dropping.</p> <p>How was it physically? Like menstrual cramps x5</p> <p>How long did you grieve? After I found out my HCG levels were dropping, I gave myself 3 days after the miscarriage to suck it up and move on.</p> <p>Did you wait to TTC? Nope. We concieved about 2-3 weeks after the miscarriage. Now 18 weeks along and baby looks good.</p> <p>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? I was less confident, more anxious. But a home fetal doppler helped that. I didn't want to "ruin" the experience for any viable pregnancies. I gave my loss it's due grieving period. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581960 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 18:57:39 +0000 GoGoSnoGirl 2581960@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. :sad: </p> <p>How far along were you? 6.5 wks<br /> How was it physically? The cramping was a bit worse than menstrual cramps, heavy bleeding for~5 (?) days.<br /> How long did you grieve? The first month was the hardest and I cried for days, but it slowly got easier as the months (&amp; ttc) went on.<br /> Did you wait to TTC? No, the 1st cycle after we just ntnp, then I resumed temping &amp; opks the 2nd cycle after mc<br /> Did it affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Absolutely. I felt like I'd lost my innocence around pregnancy &amp; had had no idea how often mc happens. I also had 1 day of heavy bleeding around 5wks in my 2nd pregnancy, so I was terrified I was losing our DD as well, but fortunately she is here with us &amp; I had no other major problems during that pregnancy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581945 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 18:26:54 +0000 Mrs. Cereal 2581945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? Almost 8 weeks.<br /> How was it physically? Had to have a DNC. It was physically very uncomfortable and I was awake for it, which added an extra level of awful to it.<br /> How long did you grieve? I am still grieving at times. It comes and goes, these days it is gone longer. But I still think about that baby every day.<br /> Did you wait to TTC? We started TTC after one cycle in between. I just wasn't ready right afterwards.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Yes, most definitely. I have epic anxiety, so the loss added to my anxiety surrounding pregnancy. Both of my subsequent pregnancies had some complications and that was really scary. I am debating having another child and experiencing another loss is terrifying.</p> <p>The best thing I did was join a loss support group. The ladies I met helped me immensely and when I got pregnant again, they were there for me as I freaked out and worried incessantly. Message me if you need to talk. I'm here for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581929 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 17:51:14 +0000 simplyfelicity 2581929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 4 weeks; 11 weeks<br /> How was it physically? Just like a period; needed a D&amp;C<br /> How long did you grieve? I can't really put a time on this. My CP was hard because it was my first loss and my second was devastating because I was almost out of the first trimester. I will always want all of my babies but it worked out the way it did so I could have my son and I would do it all again a thousand times to have him. :heart:<br /> Did you wait to TTC? no; 1 month<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? I had my CP in April, got pregnant in June, had a D&amp;C in August and got pregnant with my son in Octobet </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581925 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 17:48:10 +0000 sslm 2581925@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 5ish weeks. Wasn't too sure but I'd known about it for a little over a week. I also had one at 8.5 weeks but I won't answer for that one...<br /> How was it physically? Just like a heavy period. Not a lot of cramping.<br /> How long did you grieve? In a way I guess I still grieve both my losses, but crying about it kind of grieving? Probably until I got my period again<br /> Did you wait to TTC? No.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Having had two, I was pretty nervous for my whole first trimester. And basically the whole pregnancy. But I'm an anxious person in general. </p> <p>I'm so sorry for your loss. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581898 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 17:11:48 +0000 Tanjowen 2581898@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I've had 2 losses, one at 9 weeks and one recently at 6 weeks. I'll answer for the 6 week. </p> <p>How far along: 6 weeks<br /> Physically: Not as bad as expected. But I did take the meds my doctor offered and stayed in bed for 2 days. I felt unbelievably tired and bled a lot more than expected.<br /> Grief: The 1st loss was hard. I grieved and cried so much. This loss I was numb and I'm just angry at times. Now at a month later I'm starting to feel somewhat normal.<br /> TTC: Waiting for a period to come back and blood testing before trying again.<br /> Future pregnancies : Definitely more cautious and hate knowing how wrong it can go since my first LO was such a ridiculously easy pregnancy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581676 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 13:12:43 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2581676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 5w 3d</p> <p>How was it physically? Brutal! Every tissue that passed or attempted to pass was so painful. I didn't take anything for the pain rightaway, but then I realized I didn't have a baby to protect anymore 3 Ibuprofens helped.</p> <p>How long did you grieve? I grieved for a while- definitely a couple months. I was heartbroken. When I discussed it with others besides DH I put on a brave face about that just being a part of TTC, but there was a real sense of loss (a dream).</p> <p>Did you wait to TTC? I waited a full two cycles per doctor's orders. When we didn't get pregnant two cycles in a row I knew I needed to take some more time.</p> <p>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? I tested like crazy for weeks even after confirming my pregnancy with a blood test. I celebrated the day I was 5w 4d. For much of the pregnancy I struggled with bonding with the baby in utero, but I don't know if that had anything to do with how my first pregnancy ended. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581655 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 12:55:45 +0000 delight 2581655@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? If we are talking early, I had a natural one at 7w. (I've also had one at 10w and 22w loss)<br /> How was it physically? Painful! Like @mrskoala:, it was more painful than labour. I wish I had thought to take some sort of pain relievers!!<br /> How long did you grieve? Not too long. It was our first month TTC and I fell pregnant with DD 3 months later. I look back at that mc now and think that if it hadn't of happened, I wouldn't have had my awesome daughter. I feel much much much differently about my 22w loss.<br /> Did you wait to TTC? No, we tried right after.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future: No my early loss was something I accepted well and shrugged it off as "just a part of life". It sucked at the time of course but I was not devastated. I moved on and was thankful to have a healthy DD shortly after. </p> <p>All the best to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581582 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 11:33:47 +0000 PurplePumps 2581582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 8 weeks<br /> How was it physically? I had a D&amp;C<br /> How long did you grieve? I guess I didn't really since I was still guarded about it working after 3+ years of trying and 4 IVF retrievals.<br /> Did you wait to TTC? One cycle, just cause of vacation plans<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Dunno yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581581 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 11:33:41 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2581581@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: Sorry you are experiencing this : (</p> <p>I was 8 weeks, or should have been. I was at work and started bleeding and cramping. I kept rushing to the bathroom to check if it was getting worse. I obsessively googled spotting in early pregnancy. It was thanksgiving and I think I waited till the next day to call. </p> <p>They had me come in but I don't remember if it was the same day or not, might have been monday. The doctor said that I was measuring 6 weeks and he thought he saw a heartbeat but wasn't sure (so annoying!!! I honestly think he just didnt want to say the bad news to my face) so he sent me to get an ultrasound across the street with more detail. Then he called me and said unfortunately no heartbeat and baby had stopped growing. I had a choice of taking medicine or getting d&amp;c. I decided to get the d&amp;c to get closure faster. But, we were headed out of state for my sister's wedding so I had to wait at least a week to schedule it. Before we left for the wedding, my cramping and bleeding got worse and worse and was very painful. It actually had mostly stopped by the time we were on the trip. Just in case, I didnt drink at the wedding cause I was secretly holding out hope. We flew home at night and had the appointment early the next morning, which was very stressful. I asked the doctor, who was very compassionate and kind, to do an ultrasound before doing the procedure to make sure, and she said of course, always. It turned out everything was already gone, so I didnt have to have the procedure. Definitely a tiny blessing in disguise so at least I was spared that part. </p> <p>She told me to wait one normal cycle and then try again. I ended up getting pregnant 3 cycles later. The last day of work before maternity leave ended up being thanksgiving day. Early in the pregnancy, at work I had very slight bleeding. I went home from work and got an ultrasound, before my first appt had even been scheduled. The doctor said it was good for me to come in and it was beneficial for me to get ultrasounds in times like this to avoid stress, which I really appreciated. </p> <p>Sending you love and support. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581571 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 11:21:07 +0000 PawPrints 2581571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you're going through this.</p> <p>How far along were you?<br /> 6 weeks</p> <p>How was it physically?<br /> Like a heavy period, with the usual cramping. Not terrible. </p> <p>How long did you grieve?<br /> It hit me at random times for a few weeks I think. I was devastated initially, then very sad for a while and definitely took time to grieve, but I got over it relatively quickly. Like this sounds bad but I was a lot worse off when we had to euthanize my cat. That's my metric for emotional devastation these days.</p> <p>Did you wait to TTC?<br /> No, we started trying again the next cycle.</p> <p>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies?<br /> Yes, for the first trimester, I was constantly terrified and felt like the days were dragging by and all I wanted was to make it to the magic 9-10 weeks or whatever. After that though, I felt totally fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581561 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 11:09:24 +0000 808love 2581561@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: After the two week (or was it ten days?- whatever it said on the pregnancy box) wait, I tested. We weren't trying or interested in pregnancy but I accidentally didn't track something on Fertility Friend (to avoid pregnancy) so I had my suspicions .Two days later after I confirmed pregnancy, I started to miscarry. :( This was six years ago and it was very, very hard. I realize the sadness and grief about my loss is just another facet inside of me that doesn't go away. It is part of my make up now. I don't dwell on it like the I did the first month but it is just a tender part of me that will always remember the emotional loss. This is probably the first time I am thinking about it so deeply in years and the first time I responded to a thread on this so I hope you are somehow comforted that you are not alone in this.<br /> It was physically ok. Meaning terrible but not painful. I wanted to lay in bed all the time. :( :crying:<br /> We waited exactly 3 months and conceived immediately. It affected me in that after I became pregnant the first time, I knew -that I knew -that I knew I wanted to have a baby the second time and was so READY. I was a little worried about baby's health and didn't take a moment of pregnancy for granted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581547 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 10:42:26 +0000 petunia354 2581547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>-How far along were you? 5 weeks and some days.<br /> -How was it physically? Much easier than my loss at 8 weeks. It basically felt like a bad period.<br /> -How long did you grieve? It happened in Feb and though it's easier now I still struggle with both of my losses.<br /> -Did you wait to TTC? We chose to wait until this fall to TTC. I had a loss at 8 weeks last fall so the 2 losses really took a toll on us. We planned a trip to Disney for this Oct and used that as something for us to focus on and look forward to, since it will be right around our second due date. After the first loss I couldn't wait to TTC again, but after the second loss at 5 weeks I definitely went through a period of thinking we would never try again, it was just too painful emotionally.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Our first loss definitely took away any excitement in our subsequent pregnancy. I felt very detached from it during the short time I knew I was pregnant. I imagine it will be the same if not worse for any future pregnancies for me.</p> <p>I'm so sorry you are going through this! It is heartbreaking. I'm sending you lots of love! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581541 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 10:29:22 +0000 nana87 2581541@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry you're going through this...</p> <p>How far along were you? 5w1d</p> <p>How was it physically? It felt like a really heavy, long period, with more nausea and cramps than a period.</p> <p>How long did you grieve? Oh gosh, awhile. The first month was especially hard, but then it would come back in waves</p> <p>Did you wait to TTC? Yes, we actually waited 2 cycles to try again--partly bc a work opportunity came up and I wanted to make sure I wouldn't be due at during it, and partly because I wasn't emotionally ready to deal with the tww/poas (I was really traumatized by watching all my squinter tests get slightly darker and then fade away again, I took like 10 tests during my chemical...) </p> <p>Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? I'm 9w2d now and I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop still, I can't really believe there's a baby growing yet...I think I felt much more bonded during my first pregnancy (lo is now 2) than I do now, like I'm shielding myself from getting hurt again. Though also, chasing a toddler takes most of my energy, so that could be why I was more bonded before with her, I didn't already have one who needed constant attention. I have my second u/s later today (my ob is amazing and scheduled this one as an extra cautious check because of my loss) and I'm really anxious, I think I will be until we're at least out of the first tri, and then past the 20 week scan...Though, I'm more anxious to tell people now--it felt HORRIBLE to me that people didn't know about my loss, like it made it less real. So I've told more people now even though it's still early, though only people who I know would be supportive/I would be comfortable telling if we lose this one as well </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581530 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 10:08:23 +0000 LindsayLou 2581530@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry that you're going through this. </p> <p>I was 6 weeks, plus one day, when my miscarriage started.</p> <p>Physically, the worst of it was the first 2-3 days. After that, I still had cramping, and felt hollow, achey, and exhausted. I kept bleeding for 12 days.</p> <p>I grieved well into my next (healthy) pregnancy.</p> <p>I did not wait to ttc again, and conceived my daughter the very next cycle. </p> <p>My miscarriage absolutely affected how I felt in my second pregnancy, and I'm sure it will continue to affect future pregnancies. I felt more attached to the pregnancy I lost than I did to the first half of my successful pregnancy. Every little twinge or cramp or spot of blood (I had spotting at 16 weeks), I was worried that I was losing another baby. Even now, with a happy and healthy 10 month old in my arms, the pain and the worry are still there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581529 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 10:06:24 +0000 mrsjd 2581529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so so sorry for your loss. It's awful and I hate it for you. I wish no one had to experience it.</p> <p>How far along were you? About 5 weeks, technically a chemical.<br /> How was it physically? Like having a heavy heavy period.<br /> How long did you grieve? Honestly, I still grieve but it is so much easier. (mine was in December 2014)<br /> Did you wait to TTC? Yes, one full cycle but also we had some career/life stuff that forced me to wait for a few more months.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? It made me less innocent, more worried. For example, I didn't tell any family except my mother until 13 weeks with my current pregnant. I didn't trust this pregnancy (I'm 30 weeks) until we had the anatomy scan.</p> <p>One of the hardest things for me is that my husband didn't have the same emotional reaction to it that I did. It never felt real to him so the loss felt less real, I think. Not that he was ever dismissive of my feelings, but he didn't grieve like I did. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581527 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 10:04:12 +0000 MrsKoala 2581527@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How far along were you? 4w5d<br /> How was it physically? Painful and heavy. Worse than labor even. I had very heavy bleeding for about 7 days.<br /> How long did you grieve? Probably about 5 months. Maybe longer.<br /> Did you wait to TTC? Yes. Dr. told us to wait one cycle. We did and DH asked to wait longer so we did. We ended up getting pregnant about 4 months later.<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? Yes, I was scared out of my mind until 12 weeks. Even then, I'm not sure I believed that this pregnancy would be successful until baby started moving regularly. Even now at almost 31 weeks, I worry.</p> <p>Miscarriage effing sucks and I hate that you are dealing with this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581526 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 09:58:38 +0000 erinbaderin 2581526@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you're going through this. When I miscarried I was six weeks along. Physically it was pretty easy - I used misoprostal. I didn't have any of the cramping is read about - the only physical problem, really, was caused by the oxycodone the doctor gave me, which made me nauseous (and which I totally didn't need). I don't remember how long I grieved - I remember months later I'd be at my desk and suddenly a wave of grief would hit me, my face would just crumple. I bought a ring as a sort of memento because I wanted to have something tangible. I think we went back to TTC right away but I'm not 100% sure - this was a random natural pregnancy after 3 years of fertility treatment and we went back to IUI after. </p> <p>It definitely made me more stressed for my next pregnancy. I remember my husband was away on business and I called him sobbing convinced that this pregnancy was also going to end, and I later realized it was the same day in the pregnancy that I'd lost the last one. It got easier as it went on, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581524 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 09:55:49 +0000 FaithFertility 2581524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How early are you talking?!<br /> I had 2 very early miscarriages/chemical pregnancies<br /> One after our 1st IUI at 4 weeks<br /> Second after our second at aroundaround 5-6 weeks</p> <p>First one my body didnt bleed for a bit and I took proverb to start the bleeding , I was devastated as we tried for almost 2 years before this with out EVER getting PG so when I took the blood test and my numbers never doubled and dropped it killed me!<br /> Second as well I just couldn't understand it happening again!</p> <p>Second time my body bled a few days later no.pain, just normal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-early-miscarriage#post-2581521 Wed, 06 Jul 2016 09:48:27 +0000 jedeve 2581521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you had an early miscarriage, what was it like for you? I know everyone is different but I don't really know much about miscarrying this early. I don't have any frame of reference. </p> <p>How far along were you?<br /> How was it physically?<br /> How long did you grieve?<br /> Did you wait to TTC?<br /> Did affect how you felt in future pregnancies? </p>