https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 07 May 2026 15:32:11 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696770 Mon, 13 Feb 2017 00:51:31 +0000 ALV91711 2696770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS is almost 4 now but his first year I was home and nursing. I basically did all the night wake ups and getting up in the morning since DH had to go to work and I could nap with DS. Once or twice a week he would get up with DS in the morning so I could get some extra sleep. </p> <p>After I went back to work we split night waking. DH would do anything until abou 1/2am and I'd do the rest. it took until after 2 for DS to sleep through the night. </p> <p>I get up with DS on weekday mornings. I can deal with the earlier wake ups easier and finally DS is starting to sleep later. We each get a sleep in day on the weekends. </p> <p>If I'm feeling unwell or exceptionally tired I'll tell DH and he'll do extra mornings. DS has started waking some nights recently and I just handle it since he comes to me and I can fall asleep faster in the middle of the night. </p> <p>I think it is something that you have to talk about and do what is best for your family. DH does lots of other things to help out and if he needs that bit more sleep and I can get by without it then that is the way it will be. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696137 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 12:46:59 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2696137@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in a similar situation. It was excruciatingly apparent during the newborn days! Argh. DH would be so, so tired, even after a seemingly long night's sleep. Then I realized he had a real, legit problem and it took me a long time to realize it. DH snores loudly and I would often notice pauses in his breathing. I finally looked it up and he fit the description for sleep apnea. I now make sure he sleeps on his belly and not on his back. Problem solved :happy: </p> <p>Not sure if this would help you any, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to share. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696118 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 12:11:08 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2696118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: Maybe one or two. But I have a really hard time falling asleep and can't sleep unless everything is just right. So daylight and noise make it nearly impossible. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696116 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 12:07:21 +0000 wrkbrk 2696116@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: No nap in 30 years!! This made me LOL! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696114 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 12:05:49 +0000 wrkbrk 2696114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: DW cannot go back to sleep if awoken like ... at all. I can in 30 seconds flat. So I do, and always have done, all the night wakings. To compensate, she does more other stuff (cleaning, cooking, driving DS to school, etc). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696070 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 09:07:49 +0000 Cherrybee 2696070@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You get so much sympathy and commiseration from me. My DH is useless if his sleep is compromised. I have handed ALL night duties for both of our children, including our older DD who didn't STTN consistently until she was 3 and her baby sister was already here (and she is still not STTN at 10mths). Yet, still, if my DH is slightly disturbed in the night, he's a wreck and don't we all know about it. God, the sound of him snoring while I handle everything makes me rage. I'm very, very bitter about it but I just keep telling myself that it won't be forever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696042 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 07:16:12 +0000 Rocker2014 2696042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are not alone! DH is completely unable to function (and awful to be around) when he doesn't get the sleep he needs, which is a lot. I can function reasonably well on very little, so very early on we made a plan where I do ALL the night wakings, but DH takes on way more chores around the house. 2 years later this is still working for us (LO has always been a terrible sleeper.) DH does all the kitchen maintenance in the house, including most of the cooking, as well as floors, trash and toy pickup. This works for us as I get to have more restful time during the day, though I'm not a nap person, and he gets good sleep at night. It is not a division of labor that works for everyone, and I don't know if it would work with 2, but it has been a good option for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2696023 Sat, 11 Feb 2017 00:24:08 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2696023@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: Yeah. I feel like a terrible person, but I have so much trouble being sympathetic she she's sick. I'm working on it. 😉 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695978 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 21:43:05 +0000 gingerbebe 2695978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I get it, my husband has a 150 mile commute, although not every day. I prioritize his sleep because I want him to be safe. But perhaps you can do some things to help him get up. </p> <p>Is your son old enough to use an okay to wake clock? You can tell him he needs to stay in bed until the light hits 7am and then set your husband's alarm for 640am and let him snooze until then or however long it takes him to slowly rise. My husband usually needs a few minutes to get his bearings and use the bathroom before he can go get the kids but our guys wait in their rooms until we get them.</p> <p>How often is your toddler waking anyway? He should be sleeping most nights, no? Because of that I didn't feel bad about making DH get up with him at night. While I can usually get up and I am the one who hears DS1 when he wakes at night, when I was pregnant I would shake DH and tell him he needs to get up. Perhaps that meant DH needed a minute to get up and go to DS slower than I would, DH just needed to learn to deal with it better by doing it more often. He needed to work through his own coping methods the next day. Perhaps that meant he needed a lot more caffeine the next day and early bedtime, but he wouldn't be able to figure it out unless he had to, you know? Maybe you can start with making him do any MOTN wakeups on Friday or Saturday nights and getting up with DS on Saturdays and Sundays. Maybe they can do a donut breakfast date every few weeks and let you sleep in. I think if your husband made some kind of effort to acknowledge the disparity it would go a long way.</p> <p>Another thing is getting a mommy helper. After DS2 was born I got someone to come on Saturday mornings. I would send our helper to the park with DS1 for 2-ish hours and have her handle lunch and snack and I would focus on the baby and take a nap myself. Then DS1 would go down for his nap and DH was on deck with DS1 until dinner time, which was often delivery Chinese. Then he handled DS1's bath and bedtime and it was just an easier day for me overall and it helped a ton. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695962 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 20:48:55 +0000 yellowbird 2695962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: well I'm a morning person so I'm usually okay and fine for a while but after a few hours I start getting a pounding headache and I'm passing out by 6pm that night. </p> <p>I power through though and still get what I need to done. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695961 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 20:43:25 +0000 hellobeeboston 2695961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: having two kids has been a huge adjustment for us. So many people we know said going from 1 to 2 was no big deal, but it was for us!! Having a newborn when our older son was 3 was tough as the 3 yo was a handful at that age. The baby was almost easy (despite the no sleep) but I would say we really split the responsibilities down the middle, having him take LO 1 was key, it was very overwhelming having them both for me for a while. He actually handled it much better... but I would have that discussion. He's probably going to need to help out way more for a good while if you have another.... it really is double the work!</p> <p>Our big struggle now is finding time for each other and for ourselves. I swear we go a week sometimes without barely speaking because of our work schedules and parenting. It's nuts. </p> <p>I hear you on the worrying about feeling resentful. It's so easy for me to fall into that and I remind myself about all he does. Try to keep honest about your feelings. I'm sure it's so easy to feel like that being home all day while he is at work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695953 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 20:22:12 +0000 ineebee 2695953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is helping. Thanks, everyone, for contributing to this conversation. I'm definitely not alone!</p> <p>@bhbee: Holy crap, Kindergarten starts at 7:40?? Wow, that's early. I like that plan, though. It's practical. We sometimes do that too - planning ahead of time when DH will wake up with DS - but because he has to wake up suddenly, he'll (DH) still need that nap afterwards, so it just feels kinda useless!</p> <p>@looch: I WISH that were the case. I wish I could say that he doesn't get enough sleep. But seriously, we'll go to bed at 9:30 on a Friday night, and he'll get up at 7am (when I've been up with DS from 5:30a). By DS's nap time, DH is also ready to nap just from being on his feet and helping to entertain our son. SHRUG!</p> <p>@yellowbird: See... I totally agree with you. But I'm struggling with this so much. I want to know what DH expects if/when we have baby #2, but it's so hard to have that conversation without sounding accusatory. Question for you, though: when it's your days to wake up with the kids, how productive can you be without having had the sleep you need?</p> <p>@ShootingStar: I hear you. I take on the mornings because it makes my life easier in a sense. If DH takes a morning, it just messes up the schedule of the whole day because of all the napping he needs to make up for the sudden wake-up. I'd rather have less of him at 100% than more of him at 60%. </p> <p>@Mrs. Turtle: "If she's sick she basically will nap all day." YEP. Exactly. I don't understand this because I've never experienced this, but I have to trust that he needs it because I know he knows how hard it is for me when he gets sick. So what can we do?? Yes, I also am trying to focus on his strengths - working a thankless job, doing the house chores that he can, etc. etc. </p> <p>@smocks: Wow, that schedule sounds torturous. I think I'd do the same if I were you! </p> <p>@Mama Bird: This is what I'm wondering. Is it equitable on the weekends? I know during the week that equitable shares of kid/house work is impossible (he has a long commute, long work hours, I'm a SAHM). But on the weekend, what does equitable work look like for us? This is a talk we need to have...</p> <p>@hellobeeboston: Not rambling! I'm interested in how things changed when you had two. I think doing man-to-man defense makes sense. But if/when we have baby #2, having DH be solely responsible for our older child... I don't know if he could handle that! It's hard for him on the weekends when I'm with him! This is gonna be the beginning of our next discussion when we talk about TTC. Sigh...</p> <p>@sarac: I hear you. And that's been my attitude all along too: someone needs to be able to deal. But I can't shake this question of "Just because I can handle more, does that mean that I have to do more? All the time?" I don't want to resent my husband, and sometimes I can shake it off and do the work happily...but sometimes it really gets to me. And I can only imagine it getting worse when we have two. This is the core of my problem. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695927 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 19:50:05 +0000 sarac 2695927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As the one who needs more sleep, I really sympathize with that spouse. I think he needs to suck it up and get over it as much as is physically possible, but people just have different sleep needs, and that's that. My husband does far better than I do on terrible sleep, and it's great, honestly, because someone needs to be able to deal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695880 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 18:00:18 +0000 hellobeeboston 2695880@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: my husband has sleep issues. If he wakes up in the middle of the night, it's usually over for him, he's up for a few hours or the rest of the night. Sooooo, that didn't mix with newborns very well. Our second is now 16 months, here's what worked for us, even though it wasn't ideal.... since I was nursing, and I can fall back asleep very easily, I was on baby duty at night. This mostly meant me and the baby were sleeping in our room and my DH was in the guest room. For almost 8 months. Yikes. On the weekends he would usually come sleep in bed with me. I didn't mind the night wake ups and he could sleep and function at work. </p> <p>Now, with two I usually had the baby and he had our older son so we split most duties. And we both work full time out of the house....So I do mornings and he does evenings. </p> <p>I really didn't mind doing the nights, I knew it was temporary, and it was. It's more even now that they both sleep through and we take turns with random wake ups.</p> <p>Sorry. Feel like I'm rambling, you get the point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695867 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 17:39:18 +0000 Mama Bird 2695867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can totally function on less sleep. I'm sure it's taking years off my life when I do, but I function. DH just plain can't. If he's up all night, he cannot think at work. Maybe it's some kind of hormone change that happens to new moms, and men just don't have the benefit of it.</p> <p>He's totally the earlier riser though. So he gets out the door first and has to pick up the kids from day care. It's all fair :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695808 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 16:24:18 +0000 smocks 2695808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have a totally unconventional scenario that doesn't necessarily apply, but I'll throw it out there. I have more sleep needs than DH does, but I never ever make him interrupt his sleep and/or naps. But this is bc he works variable shift work, and flip flops his circadian rhythm sometimes multiple times per week. It is awful and I would be a murderous zombie if it were me doing those flip flops, so I give him a pass. We aren't equitable in housework, but he has a much more challenging job than I do, and that paired with the sleep variation buys him a pass. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695783 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:45:34 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2695783@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: I'm in the same boat. DW needs SO MUCH MORE sleep than I do. I don't love getting no sleep either, but I can still function the next day. She really can't. Her sleep needs are really, really high. If she's sick she basically will nap all day. I haven't napped in...30 years? She really needs about 9 hours per night to feel good. 9 hours is a lot. So she's struggling with having young kids, one of whom is a spectacularly bad sleeper. I've had 3+ hours of uninterrupted sleep like 2 times in the last 6 months. I do pretty much all of the night wakings unless they are both up screaming and she really has to help. </p> <p>All that to say, I don't really have a solution. I've come to the conclusion that it is what it is. I definitely get resentful sometimes, but I try to remind myself that this phase will pass. And that I am doing ok. I'm tired and don't feel great, but I am functioning and still like my kids. She wouldn't like them if she were getting the sleep I'm getting! I try to just think of it as personal differences. She's great in other ways, cleaning the house, taking care of all of our animals, working two jobs so I can be a full time foster parent, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695782 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:44:19 +0000 ShootingStar 2695782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I are complete opposites with sleep. I need more than he does, but I manage better when sleep deprived. When he's sleep deprived he can be cranky and kind of useless. And normally he's cheerful and non-stop productive. So I end up prioritizing his sleep over mine. </p> <p>So for example, fairly often the baby has a tough night and I take care of it. One night I was up from 2-5 with DD then DS woke me up at 6. I was like a zombie and completely non-functional. DH took both kids and got them ready and left without me having to do anything, when normally I feed and dress DD and help with the morning routine. Instead I went back to sleep for a couple hours and went in a little late to work. This share of responsibilities makes both of us happy - he gets to sleep all night and I get a productive husband. And yesterday during the snowday I had been up with DD since 5am. So when she went down for a nap at 10 I took a nap too, and he entertained DS with playing in the snow and I don't know what else. </p> <p>Again, I'd prefer him being productive and giving me the chance to sleep. And if the baby wakes up multiple times a night or if DS comes into our room super early to tell us he has to potty, then I have DH take over. So it's not like I'm stuck with everything. I just intentionally take on more night stuff because ultimately it makes my life easier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695773 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:36:53 +0000 yellowbird 2695773@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm the one with higher sleep needs in the relationship, but even so we pick days where we will be in charge when the kids wake up (or when they were little, night wakings.) It's not reasonable to expect one parent do everything while the other gets normal sleep 100% of the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695762 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:25:01 +0000 looch 2695762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ineebee: I think you have to look at it from the perspective if there is anything he can do to change it. I mean, I am not the best person in the world the second I get out of bed, I need a paced wakeup as well, otherwise I am a grouch all day too!</p> <p>Sleep is so individual. The fact that he needs naps though, if not sick, tells me he might not be getting enough sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695761 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:23:10 +0000 bhbee 2695761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dh needs overall less sleep than me but he stays up late and is awful, truly awful at mornings. I've had to learn to accept it to a degree - I don't mind getting up so much so that's usually what happens on weekends (I always get up with them weekdays). But if I'm feeling like it's unfair I try to talk ahead of time about a plan so I can have a morning off and he can force himself. And we may try to change it up when LO1 goes to kinder in the fall (starts at 7:40!) and we may have a newborn coming. I think I will have to force the issue truthfully if I want a change. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695754 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:12:23 +0000 ineebee 2695754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Interesting perspective! I'm very interested in the "I'm the mother so I don't get a pass" idea. This is kind of what makes me think that on the weekends, it's justified that I do more. I struggle with this!</p> <p>@looch: Not exactly. It's just when he's jolted awake (without 20-30 minutes of slow wake-up time) or if he's on his feet for a long time, he is completely useless unless he naps. :( But that's frustrating for you!! I'm sure you've tried a lot of things to help improve his quality of sleep?</p> <p>@Jess1483: Yes, the complaining about being tired when I've had less sleep than him! Or the complaining about being groggy after a nap! OMG. I've asked him to tack on the phrase, "But I know you must be tired too," and it's helped. A little!</p> <p>@gingerbebe: Yes, DH definitely knows the routine and has taken on more responsibility in recent months. I take all the night wakings during the week because he has a super long commute and I couldn't live with myself if he got into an accident because he was up in the MOTN with DS and fell asleep at the wheel. </p> <p>@erinbaderin: I like your perspective. It IS a little bit of both: getting over it AND accepting different strengths and weaknesses. I'm thinking maybe we can have a talk about that. Maybe I'm not noticing some of his strengths because I have tunnel vision about his sleep needs. Thank you for this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695751 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 15:02:24 +0000 erinbaderin 2695751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband can get by on a little sleep but he's not great being woken up in the night - it takes him a long time to wake up and understand what's going on. He also sleeps pretty deeply so he generally doesn't hear the kids when they wake up in the night. This means that I have to decide whether to wake him up and deal with the frustration of having to listen to a crying kid for several minutes while I explain what I need him to do or just deal with it myself. </p> <p>I think it's a combination - to be honest, there is a little bit of "he just needs to get over it", although in a loving way, and then there's a little bit of accepting that we have different strengths and he picks up the slack in other ways. Maybe one weekend day per week he could just suck it up so you can sleep in, or he could go to bed early the night before so he's still getting his 9 hours (or whatever) but he's sleeping 9-6 instead of 11-8? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695743 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 14:51:00 +0000 gingerbebe 2695743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH needs at least 7 hours a night and usually needs a nap on the weekends. When I was pregnant with DS2 I put him in charge of DS1 because I knew once I had the baby I couldn't do both at night. If DS1 woke up sick or crying at night, DH handled it. However I would prep anything he might need at night like a water cup and syringes pre-measured with Advil in the hallway. DH also got up with DS1 in the morning and handled breakfast and getting him ready for preschool and dropping him off. DS has to get up by 7am so DH knows he has to be in bed by midnight at the latest. We aim to be asleep by 11pm most nights. During the newborn phase he handles evening feedings and baths and evening chores like bottle washing before he goes to bed. He also handles dishes and laundry almost exclusively when I'm in newborn hell. When it was time to sleeptrain he also stayed up to handle it with DS1. We have our boys on a schedule so DH knows the routine of what to do when if I'm not around. It also means there is a 2 hour block on the weekends when their naps overlap so we all take a family nap. It's wonderful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695741 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 14:50:02 +0000 Jess1483 2695741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep, DH is high sleep needs and takes for.ev.er to fall asleep. And then complains if he didn't get a good night's sleep, even if I've been up with the kids multiple times. All night time care/sick care tends to fall on me (when the babes were little, he did more, but now that they're 1 and 4, it's not every night so it's usually me). Sometimes it gets to me, sometimes I just accept it as it is. The only time it really gets to me is when he's super slow to get up and then rushes off to work instead of helping me in the morning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695735 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 14:45:45 +0000 looch 2695735@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am convinced my husband doesn't get good, deep sleep. He can go into bed at 7:30 pm and still be asleep at 9 am the next day and that to me isn't normal. Is there something like this at play with your husband? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695733 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 14:44:10 +0000 Anagram 2695733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Here's my input. My husband and I have polar opposite sleep tendencies and issues. DH can fall asleep instantly, can sleep with a child literally on top of him or while the kids kick and roll on him, can sleep with a light on, or the tv on. BUT, he's an early riser (no matter what), and sometimes if he is woken in the very early morning, he can't go back to sleep. So if the kids wake him at 4:50 am, he might be up for the day. Temperament-wise, I'm lucky that DH is laid back in general. He just isn't a cranky or snappish person in general. So even on less sleep, he's an ok dude. He also doesn't nap--like, ever.</p> <p>I am the polar opposite. I'm very snappy when I don't get enough sleep--especially towards DH. I am a night owl and would prefer to stay up late and sleep in late. I frequently have struggles with insomnia. I have trouble falling asleep and it can take me an hour. BUT once I am finally asleep, I am asleep...and even a wakeup or two won't stop me from falling back asleep. Also, I can nap during the day (if conditions are right).</p> <p>Now--the difference here is that I am the female and mother. And I am the one who really needs more sleep (because of my propensity to be B*tchy when I'm tired). But because I am the mother, and mothers tend to not get a pass on these things, we have a pretty equal split of nighttime/early morning duties. We rotate.</p> <p>Even if I have insomnia and am up till 2 or 3 am, if it's my turn to wake up with the kids, I have to get up. That means I'm cranky all day, but I'm the mother so I don't get a pass. but the fact that I have more sleep issues means that my husband has always done more than most other husband I know. We've always split night wakings, and we've always split early morning duty. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/tell-me-about-your-so-who-needs-more-sleep-than-you#post-2695720 Fri, 10 Feb 2017 14:36:57 +0000 ineebee 2695720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just wanna hear that I'm not alone. I can function better than DH on less sleep, and after being awoken suddenly. These two together mean that I'm generally the one who gets DS in the mornings, while DH sleeps for a while longer. He also tends to take multiple naps a day when he gets sick. </p> <p>I accept that my ability to power through is greater than his. Or do I? I accept that because I'm more able, I do more...Or do I? And now with the possibility of baby #2, I don't know how to deal with this disparity. I know I can handle the physical challenges of being a SAHM with two kids, but I'm really afraid of how it'll affect how I view my very wise, very loving, honest, amazing, but very sleepy DH.</p> <p>If you are or were in a similar situation, how do you deal? I'm very interested in your nuanced solutions, or even just commiseration. He is a good, good man, so no "Screw him, he needs to get over it" comments, please. </p>