https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 23 Jun 2026 14:18:42 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368194 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:52:45 +0000 mellybelly 368194@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Bluebonnet: That definitely worries me if my husband were to get laid off. </p> <p>@pelikila: I have a very good relationship with my boss. I have had some issues in the past, and he was more than accommodating for me, and really has my best interests at heart. That makes me want to tell him sooner rather than later.</p> <p>@ladyfingers: I'm with you! Maybe I'm just too honest/good-girl/whatever you call it, but I just don't think I could ever do that, no matter what I feel like I "deserve." I have several friends who've done it though, so I know it's common. As for your question, I'm not on my company's insurance (I am on my husband's plan), so they wouldn't have any expense during my maternity leave. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368167 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:40:26 +0000 lemondrop 368167@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a similar situation- I was the only full time instructor in my department at a career college, and knew that I would only want to return part-time after the baby was born. I had to let my boss know early since I have work hazards that I shouldn't be exposed to during pregnancy and we have limited qualified people in our area. I told them at 8 weeks, and they didn't get my replacement until I was 34 weeks. </p> <p>I had been at my work position much longer though, so in your situation I would wait until late fall/early winter since they will still have plenty of time to make alternate plans before the summer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368112 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:17:12 +0000 ladyfingers 368112@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree you should wait until the second trimester. </p> <p>Just my two cents (and I know it's kinda moot in your case, but...) I really don't like the idea of waiting until after maternity leave to say "Hey, btw thanks for the paid leave, but I'm staying at home, peace," if you're 110% sure you want to be a SAHM. It's kinda skeezy and also you can be on the hook for that money. I know you're not getting paid leave... but would they pay your health insurance while you were gone? Most places will. That's a costly expense they're footing just to be surprised when you tell them you're not coming back. Just something to think about when weighing the advice about waiting until much later versus doing it sooner! </p> <p>Good luck! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368109 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:15:38 +0000 pelikila 368109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on your relationship with your boss. If you know telling him now will not negatively affect your work until baby comes, then I say do it now. If you feel the relationship isn't solid enough that it will negatively affect how you are utilized, then wait. I had a very favorable relationship with my boss so I told him as soon as we knew. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368105 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:13:17 +0000 Foodnerd81 368105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Bluebonnet: Just what I was thinking (husband getting laid off). </p> <p>I'm also always jumping to the worst case scenario. It's a gift. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368057 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:51:14 +0000 T.H.O.U. 368057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really would wait until at least 12-13 weeks before you tell them you are pregnant. Even then, I would wait to tell them until 20+ weeks that you don't plan on returning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368051 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:49:09 +0000 mellybelly 368051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, thank you so much everyone for all the different perspectives!! This has given me a lot more to think about and consider before I tell my boss. </p> <p>Really this has been so helpful. I'll let yall know what I decide to do!! Thanks again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-368041 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:43:51 +0000 Bluebonnet 368041@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Congratulations!</p> <p>Just wanted to give you a different perspective. I have a friend that told her company she was going to be a SAHM after her baby came. And then her husband got laid off and she wanted her job back, but they already hired somebody else. </p> <p>A lot can change between now and the time you have the baby and even more could change while you're on maternity leave. Keep your options open just in case you need to go back to work or you decide you'd rather work than stay home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367972 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:10:54 +0000 Pink Champagne 367972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think if you are positive that you're going to quit your job after you have the baby, you should absolutely tell your boss of your plans at the same time that you notify your boss of your pregnancy. That gives them plenty of time to re-evaluate what they want to do with the new position and train someone else.<br /> ETA: I think second trimester is fine as far as timing goes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367905 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 13:35:06 +0000 blackbird 367905@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you tell your boss in your second trimester, it would give them plenty of time to get a replacement and train them. Leaving your boss high and dry may not make it easy for you to come back later, if you want to. Companies appreciate consideration. Especially in engineering--it's a tough field to come back into. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367904 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 13:34:46 +0000 Alivoo01 367904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I suggest you wait until everything is finalized with the new role before revealing the news to your manager. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367851 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 13:15:47 +0000 Adira 367851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>First of all, congratulations!!!</p> <p>I think you should wait - even waiting until the second trimester gives your boss plenty of time to figure something out. And I definitely wouldn't tell him you're planning on staying home until AFTER you have the baby. He would normally have to find someone to replace you while you are out on leave anyway, so presumably that person can continue long-term once he knows you're not coming back. Plus, you just never know - you might change your mind and want to be able to come back to your job! If you tell him now that you're not coming back, you're limiting your options. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367834 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 13:07:55 +0000 MamaMoose 367834@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would absolutely wait until your second trimester when you can have more confidence in the pregnancy. If you told them you were planning to quit to become at SAHM and then God Forbid lost the pregnancy you would really regret having told them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367812 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:53:34 +0000 mellybelly 367812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: I guess I should have noted that it's a small company (less than 50 employees), so they don't have to offer any kind of maternity leave, and if they did it would be unpaid. Also, I don't have any benefits through my job since I go through my husband's company's insurance. So it really would be no different to take my "maternity leave" and not go back to work vs just telling them I'm quitting when the baby comes.</p> <p>I agree that it feels so early to tell anyone outside my family, so I'm definitely torn about this. I would probably be more comfortable telling the boss around Thanksgiving (I'll be 9 weeks), so I might just wait until then. Thanks for your thoughts! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367791 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:47:22 +0000 Foodnerd81 367791@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't tell him that you are planning to be a SAHM until after you have the baby. I think it is ok to be vague about when you will return, but I assume you have maternity leave coming to you, and wouldn't want to jeopardize that. I can see telling him a little earlier than planned, though, but also don't think you should tell before you are ready. What if you do it more like around Thanksgiving-- earlier than expected, but not SO early. I probably won't even tell my mom until later than 5 weeks!<br /> I know I won't be coming back after I have kids, but I'll be leaving that vague with work until my mat leave is up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367764 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:38:02 +0000 mellybelly 367764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsBrewer: I've always wanted to be a SAHM when the kid(s) are young, and in light of the recent developments at work, I have tried to really figure out if that's still what I want. After a couple of weeks of contemplating this, I am even more convinced that I want to quit my job and stay home with baby.</p> <p>Thanks so much for your input! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367757 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:34:08 +0000 MrsBrewer 367757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Are you for sure going to be a stay home mom? If so I think I would still wait a few more weeks, but I would try and tell your boss as early as possible in this situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-the-boss-help#post-367751 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:32:13 +0000 mellybelly 367751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know there have been several threads on this, but I really need some advice for my situation! </p> <p>I have been with my company for almost 2 years, and in the last two weeks, I have been given a new role in the company to oversee our own products. I had never worked with our own products before, so it's almost been like learning a completely new job. They are having to train me in several different aspects of this new role. My boss is really excited to have me in this role, so that he can have some consistency in the management of our products for the long term. However, I am five weeks pregnant and I know I want to be a stay at home mom when the baby comes in June.</p> <p>If I didn't have this new role, I would probably just tell them around Christmas time, when I'll be starting my second trimester. But should I tell them earlier so that they can rethink their long-term plan, and possibly start training someone else to fill this role instead of me? I really like my boss/co-workers, and I want to leave on good terms so that I can possibly come back when the kid(s) are older. </p> <p>What would you do?! Thanks so much for your advice! </p>