https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Apr 2026 03:26:44 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097744 Fri, 06 Mar 2015 10:09:18 +0000 Bluebonnet 2097744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs.KMM: Normally, I'm really against people resigning before they have a baby for the reasons others have listed (maternity benefit payout, health insurance coverage, being 100% sure you want to SAH, security of DH's job/what would happen if he lost his job, etc). </p> <p>But it sounds like you aren't paid any maternity benefits and your insurance coverage is although through your spouse. As long as you're in a good financial position and 150% sure you do not want to return to work, then give advanced notice to give your employer enough time to find a replacement. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097656 Fri, 06 Mar 2015 08:58:47 +0000 Radish 2097656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I told her 6 weeks before my planned last day (8 weeks before due date). I knew for much longer, but felt no obligation to tell her sooner since a typical 2 week notice is all that is necessary. I thought 6 weeks was plenty of time to figure out a replacement. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097567 Fri, 06 Mar 2015 07:48:15 +0000 lilyofthewest 2097567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am seriously thinking about whether I intend to return to my job. I have to give 4 weeks notice, and I can not give notice while on any kind of leave. </p> <p>I mean, really I could just not go back, but they could (and I think would) make me repay all benefits dating back to an appropriate notice period. </p> <p>I get my health insurance through my partner. And state law requires that my earned vacation leave be paid out to me even if I just walk off the job with no notice. But, I'd have to pay back all of my sick leave. I've saved up about 8 weeks over the years, so, that's a lot. </p> <p>If I do decide to leave, it won't be until after I go back. I'll probably work for a couple full weeks before making any final decisions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097553 Fri, 06 Mar 2015 07:15:43 +0000 looch 2097553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My conversation was very matter of fact. I had a 3 month notice period, so while I was on maternity leave, I called HR first, and told them I was not returning. Then I called my line manager and told him that I had decided not to return. He knew the reason was because of our day care situation, so he was absoultely fine with it.</p> <p>In the end, they ended up making my position redundant, so they didn't even have to worry about hiring. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097332 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 21:00:27 +0000 SweetiePie 2097332@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs.KMM: Duh, sorry! To answer what your main question, I tend to be an over-explainer. So maybe I said more than necessary, but I told my bosses that I had pictured myself as a SAHM for many years, but now that I have a career that I enjoy, I wasn't sure if that was still the case and the only way for me to know was to spend some time at home once he arrived. And I told them I didn't like the idea of having a deadline to return to work, I wanted to return when I was ready. Therefore I was resigning. (Then we agreed on everything I stated in my original post above). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097320 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 20:53:04 +0000 Mrs.KMM 2097320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pui: @tysonja: @MrsBananaGrabber: Because of the small environment that I work in, I can't even imagine waiting until after an unpaid maternity leave to tell my boss I'm not coming back. That to me is just burning bridges and really screwing him over. I am happy to help with training a replacement and making the transition as smooth as possible, especially with my coworker leaving very soon as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097315 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 20:50:41 +0000 Sunshine710 2097315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I told my boss on week 8 of my 12 week leave. I told them it was a tough decision but that this was what was best for our family at this time. I told her that I absolutely loved my job and would love to come back someday if there were opportunities (the truth). She said she understood, it was a good conversation. We went to lunch a few months ago as to keep in touch. I'll probably try to speak to her every so often to keep doors open! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097312 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 20:49:38 +0000 Mrs.KMM 2097312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wheres_c: All of our insurance and benefits are through my husband's job.</p> <p>@Modern Daisy: I am 150% sure the staying home is what I want to do. I have always wanted to be a SAHM!</p> <p>@Foodnerd81: I don't actually get any paid benefits/leave. I just get the 12 weeks of my job being safe that FMLA requires. So there are no paid benefits that I have earned that I could take advantage of by waiting to tell.</p> <p>All - I know my boss will be very understanding. That's not really my concern. I just wanted to know how much of an explanation people gave for their decision or if they just stated that they aren't coming back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097270 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 20:31:17 +0000 DillonLion 2097270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't decide completely until my maternity leave was over (but I went back full time). Either way, I wanted to make sure the birth and her first few months were healthy before telling my job anything other than I'd be back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097253 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 20:16:44 +0000 Foodnerd81 2097253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I came in and told my boss in person as soon as my paid portion of my leave was up. One, I wanted my paid benefits, but two, I wasn't 100% sure I'd stay home. What if DH lost his job? What if I hated being home? What if Lo had major complications at birth and we needed the extra income? </p> <p>So in short I kept my options open, but I also don't think my boss was totally shocked. And it was a big enough company that t wasn't a huge deal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097211 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 19:20:32 +0000 SweetiePie 2097211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I told my boss that I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, but they should start to think about the possibility of me not coming back. My situation is different because I got ZERO paid maternity leave. So for me to say I was taking the 3 months and then would decide was not viewed negatively. Actually, since I was unpaid anyway I also took off 2 months before my due date. (Good thing I did because I delivered 3 weeks early and it gave me some nice prep time).<br /> But anyway, I told them at the end of May that I was leaving August 1st and may not return.<br /> They appreciated the 2 months notice and that I was honest about not coming back. We agreed that I couldn't depend on them holding a position for 5 months and they couldn't depend on me coming back after 5 months. We just agreed to keep in touch every 3 weeks or so to touch base on both sides.<br /> In the end, I wanted to go back but I was considered to have quit, so I couldn't just waltz back in. They wanted me back and I wanted to be back, but red tape kept that from happening. I'm now 6 months PP and I wish I had agreed to just go back at 3 months and then make a decision. I still wouldn't have felt guilt if I quit after because it's not like I got a paid mat leave. You know what they say about hindsight... :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097195 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 18:51:14 +0000 Modern Daisy 2097195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't done this, but at my company the women who did it waited until full maternity leave was finished. One actually went out on long term disability for a year and when she was about to be cut off she finally admitted she wasn't coming back. It drives the bosses mad every time when they do it that way. But to be 100% honest if I were planning on not coming back I would also wait until the end of mat leave. I worked long and hard to earn these benefits so I want to actually get them! I wouldn't want to risk having my company not giving me the STD pay, plus I would want the 12 weeks to make absolutely sure that not coming back was my final decision. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097177 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 18:35:09 +0000 MrsBananaGrabber 2097177@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a boss, I'd appreciate being told as soon as you know, especially if it's a small work environment. It takes time to find replacements and train them. It's best to be honest and keep a good relationship with your boss, even if you're planning to stay home, in case you ever want to go back or use him/her as a reference in the future. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097079 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 16:55:54 +0000 bunnylove08 2097079@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>my coworkers told them during their mat leave. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097078 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 16:54:55 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 2097078@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I waited until my baby was born, but it wasn't to SAH, I accepted a new job... So it was like any job change. Not a huge deal. I would have told them sooner, but I did not know about my new job timeline so I kept quiet. I came back to fulfill all remaining obligations--- which amounted to a couple of shifts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2097065 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 16:45:35 +0000 tysonja 2097065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>not for mat leave, but when I decided to leave my job (small company), I decided to give my (amazinnnnggg) bosses 2-3 months notice, because it takes about that long to train someone new up. I knew there would be no hard feelings, and it was easier for everyone as I could help the new person transition in, and help the clients with the transfer as well. I didn't have to worry about insurance/getting fired early or any of those things, though. hope it goes well for you!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096986 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 16:03:16 +0000 MrsMccarthy 2096986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our case may not be helpful because we were moving across the country. Telling them about the pregnancy and the move all at once was a lot but they were happy for us and we did give notice. I wouldn't take leave though unless you plan to go back for at least enough time to train someone new. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096964 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 15:49:28 +0000 daniellemybelle 2096964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I told my HR person first and then my boss over the phone after my maternity leave. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096958 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 15:45:41 +0000 pui 2096958@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a small company owner, we would like to just be told, as soon as possible, if someone is leaving. The sooner the better. We wouldn't be upset with any reason someone decides to leave, we'd just like to know so we can sort out a replacement.</p> <p>Your boss will probably be stressed out that everyone is leaving lol, but if he is a good boss, he should be understanding and accommodating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096951 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 15:41:37 +0000 wheres_c 2096951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I waited until the baby was born. It's not what I wanted to do, but I needed to keep my insurance. Are you insured through your job or your husbands?<br /> My boss was very understanding. I told him it was cost prohibitive given the cost of childcare in FL. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096870 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 14:52:29 +0000 jhd 2096870@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I actually had to tell him over the phone. He was shocked and really didn't say much. It wasn't how I wanted to resign but LO had health issues which prevented me from doing it in person. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096866 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 14:50:08 +0000 Tanjowen 2096866@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I decided to return to give it a fair shot to make sure I really wanted to SAH. After a week, I told my boss and we worked out a one month plan for me to train my replacement. She was very understanding and happy for me, and grateful I was willing to work on a flexible end date.</p> <p>To be fair, I was only able to do that because my mom stepped up to the plate and kept my LO that month. Otherwise I'm not sure which route I would have taken in telling her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096811 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 14:16:43 +0000 LuLu Mom 2096811@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't personally but a coworker did before me and our boss was very understanding, he was happy she had given him plenty of notice to train someone before leaving. There were no hard feelings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096740 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 13:35:03 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2096740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I told him at the end of my mat leave. I just said that we decided it was best for us right now for me to stay home. He said he was happy for us. </p> <p>Good luck! It's nervewracking for sure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/telling-your-boss-youre-not-returning-post-baby#post-2096733 Thu, 05 Mar 2015 13:33:16 +0000 Mrs.KMM 2096733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For those of you who worked before deciding to become SAHMs, how did you tell your boss that you weren't planning to come back? Did you explain any of your reasoning behind your choice, or just state that that's what you were doing?</p> <p>I am due with my first in June and work in a teeny tiny academic research lab. It is just my boss, me, and one other girl. I found out this morning that my one other coworker just put in her two weeks notice and I am planning to not come back after the birth of my baby this summer.</p> <p>DH and I have decided to let my boss know this on Monday so that he can make re-hiring decisions accordingly versus thinking that I'm coming back which might change his plans. So I'd really appreciate any insight on how the conversation went when any of you told your bosses that you would not be returning. </p>