https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 01 May 2026 19:00:48 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy/page/2#post-2764255 Wed, 02 Aug 2017 08:13:19 +0000 bubblegum 2764255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: Yes! I'm so happy about that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy/page/2#post-2763987 Tue, 01 Aug 2017 15:40:22 +0000 youboots 2763987@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: awesome! It's great you did not have to wait long. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2763947 Tue, 01 Aug 2017 14:53:19 +0000 bubblegum 2763947@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just wanted to update everyone that I have an official appt. At this moment, I'm not in overload like before but I want to go and give it a try because I know these episodes come and go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761285 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 15:24:31 +0000 bubblegum 2761285@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catomd00: My fingers are crossed that I find a good fit </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761270 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 14:18:21 +0000 catomd00 2761270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have seen the same therapist on and off for the better part of a decade now, starting during a bad relationship before I met DH. I went regularly for a few years, then stopped for about 2 and went back again about a year ago to deal with specific issues with my mother. I have seen my therapist for so many random issues though - relationships, sexual assault, eating disorder, anxiety/depression, family stuff, dealing with chronic pain. I think everyone should have a good therapist on hand! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761261 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 13:55:13 +0000 bubblegum 2761261@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsLonghorn: That's what I'm so fearful of. I'm already in a discouraged state and having to wait to hear back is making it a tad worst. If I get set up with a bad therapist, it's going to for sure make me feel defeated. I hope I'm able to push through. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761254 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 13:43:54 +0000 MrsLonghorn 2761254@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tried seeing a therapist many years ago, as a young adult having issues with my mother. My first therapist took forever to find and get an appointment and was a horrible fit. I hated her and my second session was worse - she was completely dismissive of me.<br /> I KNOW I should have put in the effort to find someone else, and keep going, but I just couldn't handle it at the time. SO please remember that the first person may not be a good fit, and don't give up like I did!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761214 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 12:40:59 +0000 bubblegum 2761214@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@helloperidot: I hope you're able to accomplish that through your sessions with your therapist. I know that it must be difficult to not have those tools and giving you peace in dealing with the situations, good for you for making that move. I am hoping I find it to be just as helpful as you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761208 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 12:26:34 +0000 helloperidot 2761208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have an appointment on the 2nd to start seeing a therapist to help me deal with mom issues (she's controlling and emotionally manipulative, and I think borderline narcissistic). Mainly I'm looking for tools to set and enforce boundaries, how to maintain some semblance of a relationship if that's what's healthiest (or, to be honest, an unbiased opinion on whether I should go low or no contact), and to deal with my own issues processing guilt and emotional manipulation.</p> <p>I've been in therapy off and on for other things (recovering from an abusive relationship, general anxiety, coping after we experienced a loss last year) and have found it's a life changing experience. It's definitely hard work, but the work is worth it. It won't fix things overnight, but I know for me therapy has been an invaluable experience and I'm excited to get back in and do more work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761163 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 10:43:06 +0000 bubblegum 2761163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lamariniere: That's amazing. I'm hoping the process is that quick for me. I'm bummed that I'm on a wait list since I have no idea how long it'll take and I feel like I really need the help now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761125 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 09:39:48 +0000 lamariniere 2761125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: that's great that you are taking steps towards getting help! I went to therapy for anxiety two years ago and it was amazing. I got lucky and really connected with the therapist the first day. She was excellent and within 5 sessions I had the tools I needed to deal with my triggers and she and I both decided I didn't need to come anymore. She said I could come back for a "touch up" session anytime, but I haven't really needed it. I hope you find a good match and get the support you need. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2761088 Mon, 24 Jul 2017 08:08:41 +0000 bubblegum 2761088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hey ladies! I want to thank everyone for their support and for sharing their own experiences. I just wanted to give everyone an update; I finally called the therapist office. I am on a wait list, but it's a step in the right direction of finally getting help. These in laws issues keep continuing and not have anyone else to talk to other than DH is effecting me badly. I am hopeful that they call me soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751976 Mon, 26 Jun 2017 09:14:05 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2751976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do, and it's been life changing. My reasons and process are similar to what others have said. I wasn't a big believer in therapy, TBH, but about 6 years ago I went through a storm of stuff, including issues with TTC that were not within my control, and because I couldn't control them, I needed to figure out how to deal with them so I found a therapist to help me process all my frustration. And then we got pregnant and I put therapy on hold, and then parenthood hit me like a ton of bricks and dealing with post partum anxiety and the issues that I'd been dealing with around the TTC process were being exacerbated, so I needed to go back. My husband and I did about a year of marriage counseling, though we didn't have a great therapist and didn't get out of it as much as I'd hoped, but one big takeaway for me was that I absolutely needed to go talk to someone. I process my feelings and emotions verbally and I needed that outlet, as well as someone who could engage with me and help me change my behavior, not just listen. I found a great therapist who specializes in CBT (cognitive behavior therapy), and have been seeing her for a year and a half now and she has really helped me become an overall better person - more patient, more in touch with myself and how to take care of myself, more calm, less emotionally trigger-happy, etc. I don't get a lot of financial reimbursement - in the DC area, therapists are rarely in network with insurance, and mine covers less than 20% of my cost for the out of network service- but it's totally worth it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751883 Mon, 26 Jun 2017 00:13:11 +0000 BSB 2751883@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have been going on and off since college. I did do acupuncture while having infertility so it helped calm me with the worry and anxiety. Now, that we moved and I don't have a ton of time, and have been stressed with a lot of things, I have gone back to therapy. It's close to work so I can take a short break out of my day to go. </p> <p>I think I always need some form of therapy. It's good to talk it out. Also to someone IRL. I know I used to be pretty active here but online forums can only do so much. I've been distant because even I didn't feel like venting to the internet. I needed something a bit more private. </p> <p>Anyway, don't feel ashamed to talk to a therapist. I really like that they are mostly unbiased and after becoming a parent, I really needed to voice some of the things I have been keeping in. </p> <p>Also, you can see them as frequent as you like. Weekly, monthly... Whatever works.</p> <p>Oh, I didn't have PPD so I was feeling pretty good after having the twins. I think the move and new job triggered a lot of stress. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751651 Sat, 24 Jun 2017 09:43:43 +0000 bubblegum 2751651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2PeasinaPod: I'm going to have to look into it. It for sure sounds like a lengthy process but it sounds like a positive outcome. </p> <p>@HeartAbandoned: @2littlepumpkins: thanks for sharing your experiences ladies. I really appreciate it. </p> <p>@LCTBQE: I'm going to give it a try. I'll call Monday and see what can be done. I've gone this long without the help I need so I'm willing to go through the process. Thanks love</p> <p>@youboots: that's not bad! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751587 Sat, 24 Jun 2017 00:13:09 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2751587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I went for a little while when I had PPD. It helped but once I felt I could get by on my own I didn't think it was worth the time and money. Mostly it was the time. I felt like it was "me" time and then I couldn't do anything else more enjoyable for "me" time. But it did help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751524 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 19:31:49 +0000 youboots 2751524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: after I reach my deductible my insurance pays a percentage and I pay the remaining which is less than $15 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751458 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 15:22:28 +0000 LCTBQE 2751458@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: how you pay and how much varies wildly. I know people who get it free with their insurance, people who do co-pays that range from $20-60/per session, I pay fully out of pocket and pay $120/session, which is a lot, and I even know people who pay $200. My therapist is out of network, so after fulfilling my deductible I could ostensibly get paid back 80% --but my oon deductible is like 13k and I'll never fulfill it so it doesn't matter. My husband just got a new job with amazing insurance and I'm hoping I can get it covered from now on :meh:<br /> I would start by calling your insurance and seeing what they say/offer, see if they have anyone in network who they recommend if it's covered, and also ask around--I've had friends and coworkers ask me for recommendations, and I found my therapist because an old coworker loved her. It sounds annoying to do the research and digging but it's worth it :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751403 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 13:34:54 +0000 HeartAbandoned 2751403@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I started seeing a therapist last summer after I identified that I was suffering from anxiety. I knew of a counseling center in my area and made an appointment with someone who had the availability I needed. She has been wonderful, and I've been able to cut back from going weekly to going monthly now. I HIGHLY recommend it. I'm a better mom and wife because I go, and I am so much happier and more at peace than I was before. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751389 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 12:59:27 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2751389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: It all depends on how your insurance works. I started off with my company's Employee Assistance Program (EAP). They offer 10 free visits/year with a therapist. From there, it switches over to my Behavioral Health benefit. My plan offers a copay for BH services, but you may have to meet a deductible before your coverage kicks in. </p> <p>So to start, I didn't enjoy the first therapist they gave me. I saw her twice, and decided not to go back. I was pregnant with my youngest at the time, and the last time I saw her was in July. I gave birth in September, and went almost a whole year without seeing someone. I reached back out to EAP, and they found me someone new. She was part of a large BH group that also provided other services and had a ton of therapists. She was forced to retire due to a recent health diagnosis, and referred me to another counselor within the group. This was the one who canceled on me because she was "sick" more times than I saw her. I asked to be transferred. They then gave me someone who was at 5 days/week, but was cutting down to 3 days/week and needed to squeeze her 5 days of patients into 3 days and couldn't take me on as a new patient. They found me someone else within the practice and I'm still with her. She's amazing. It took me a long journey to get to where I am today, but it's been well worth it. This is why I say not to give up. I was about to, and then my current therapist came along. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751361 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 12:13:20 +0000 bubblegum 2751361@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: YES! 100 times yes. Sometimes I feel so terrible unloading on my friends, especially DH because this his family and that's not fair to him.</p> <p>@2PeasinaPod: How does the process really work? Like does insurance pay for it and you pay the co-pay? Can you not change therapists easily? I'm so glad you have that person you can find comfort in speaking to about those issues. I also have issues with my mother and I'm sure once I find the right therapist our relationship will be much better.</p> <p>@LCTBQE: Oh I'll unload on them all the topics I have in mind lol I agree. Wine and fun things do not help me resolve the problem, only helps me not think about it in the moment. Now as far as payment, is it just the co-pay you have to pay or insurance doesn't cover any of it? This is a huge question of mine.</p> <p>@Dahlia: That's interesting that you say you feel as though you aren't a great candidate but actually find it useful. That gives me hope</p> <p>@Revel: Aww fingers crossed you find the perfect one soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751330 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 11:55:51 +0000 Revel 2751330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I went for a few months for anxiety about a year ago - i didn't really connect super well with the therapist so I stopped, plus scheduling challenges etc. I'm hoping to maybe find a better fit and go back sometime after I have this baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751321 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 11:49:06 +0000 Dahlia 2751321@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: I would get frustrated sometimes because I would think "well duh, I already know that I'm doing x because of y" but the benefits of having someone else to unload on and getting some coping tips were really helpful. I'm probably the worst candidate for therapy since I hate emotion and I hate talking about it, but even I found it helpful! </p> <p>I would say try it, you've got nothing to lose. Finding the right therapist makes a difference too. I was happier with my second therapist (after we moved). She was a professor (so am I), so I think she understood my thinking more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751302 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:58:18 +0000 LCTBQE 2751302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: I've gone weekly for the past five years and the difference in how I feel and deal with problems, not to mention the extraordinary benefit to my relationship and, professional life, has been immeasurable. It's expensive and a lot of my disposable income goes to it, but therapy has made me empowered in my life and better to the people around me and better to myself. I do think it's important to find a therapist that you resonate with, and don't be afraid to try a couple of you don't love the first one. If you go with a few specific goals in mind, it can help open up some underlying themes (we all have them :) ).<br /> To me, wine and bubble baths and manicures and fun treats, not helpful for deeply painful problems. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751301 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:57:07 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2751301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: I want to also say that you may NOT find the perfect therapist on the first try, and that's ok. Sometimes the system makes it really difficult for you to continue through finding the perfect therapist for you, but please don't give up and please don't be disheartened. My journey included a bad therapist to an amazing one, to the amazing one retiring, to another bad one, to being assigned one who didn't have time to see me to finally finding my perfect therapist. We're going through some heavy stuff right now that I didn't even realize was still in the back of my mind, and I feel like therapy has been the best thing for me.</p> <p>For context, I started seeing a therapist because I had a giant blowup fight with my mom who has emotionally abused me my entire life. That had lead to a lot of twisting me up, and I'm really glad I have someone to talk through how to handle her and situations in which I feel a ton of anxiety. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751288 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:28:29 +0000 pwnstar 2751288@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: That's what makes the therapist relationship so great. I think in so many situations we hold back from the friends and family to whom we would normally turn because we don't want to burden them/are aware of the issues they are dealing with in their life, feel shame/guilt/embarrassment about the issue, don't want to hurt their feelings, change the way they think of us, etc. I don't have those concerns with my therapist--it's okay for me to solely focus on my feelings and how to process/organize those. It cuts out a lot of *noise* (and negative self-talk) and allows me to identify the root of the problem (and the issues related to it/stemming from it), and identify ways to cope/manage the situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751287 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:18:28 +0000 pwnstar 2751287@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: I agree-different categories/needs. I, personally, would not have recovered from PPA through working out or frequenting the *mothership* (a.k.a. salon). I needed professional support. I just wanted to re-frame the issue in the event that it would encourage others not to be dismissive/feel guilty for identifying a need (i.e., personal time, therapy, etc.). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751279 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:07:34 +0000 bubblegum 2751279@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@IRunForFun: That sounds so amazing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751276 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:06:52 +0000 bubblegum 2751276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: It'll be scary but I'm sure the end result will be amazing.</p> <p>@pwnstar: Yes that's what I feel that I need, just extra support through difficult times. I agree with you. Women need to really put themselves first at times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/therapy-for-mommy#post-2751273 Fri, 23 Jun 2017 10:03:44 +0000 IRunForFun 2751273@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I go to counseling once a month. I have anxiety so I was going before pregnancy and during pregnancy as well, but I'm glad I still have that outlet now postpartum. It's a safe space to talk about and through my feelings about parenting and co-parenting and my anxieties and I usually come out with a lot more clarity about things I need/want to change and how to discuss them with my loved ones (mainly DH.) My therapist doesn't tell me what to do (other than giving specific exercises or suggestions for managing anxiety) but he's really good at asking questions that lead me to my own conclusions about what I want/need to do. I actually look forward to going each month! </p>