https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 16 May 2026 23:23:09 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1017587 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 22:27:24 +0000 SweetiePie 1017587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry again for your loss :-( . I think that any feeling you have is legitimate - I'm a firm believer that when you suffer a loss like so many of us have, there's no feeling or thought process that's "wrong". Sadness, frustration, anger...happiness because you get to drink wine again :-) All of that is "normal" because its how you feel. </p> <p>With both of my losses, I've had a friend that ended up being due 2 weeks before me. My most recent one (found out about loss two weeks ago, D&amp;C one week ago) I was due Feb 19th and one of my close friends is due Feb 4th. We were so excited to be due so close together, so its hard now to know that as she progresses I would have been 2 weeks behind her.<br /> My first one I would have been due in two weeks (Aug 30th)! And our friend was due 8/10 (she ended up giving birth 4 weeks early and I'm meeting her baby girl tomorrow). So after my MC in January, to get a text from her that she was due 2 weeks before I would have been was hard.<br /> Absolutely NO ill will or resentment towards either of them - I am so happy for them both and, coincidentally, they have both suffered miscarriages - so that makes it so much sweeter that they have arrived or are on their way to a healthy baby. But it will definitely be hard to meet the baby that would have been so close to the age of mine tomorrow - and to watch my other friend progress as I would have if the 2nd had stuck...a constant reminder from both.</p> <p>The point of my rant is that you're not alone and we all have stories about the pregnancy announcements that stung the most - feel no guilt or shame :-) Lots of love to you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1016782 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 15:36:39 +0000 pastemoo 1016782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aww hugs! Been there, done that. Glad it's over.</p> <p>Eventually you will get to that point, too.<br /> I can't even understand why it hurts so much--I'm not usually a jealous person but with TTC I was very jealous in the bad and pain-inducing way quite often. It was not fun at all.</p> <p>sticky baby dust to you in your next TWW! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1016176 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 12:50:42 +0000 PEAPIE 1016176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1016170 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 12:49:09 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1016170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Sprite: @googly-eyes: @erinpye: Thanks ladies! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014895 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 02:36:05 +0000 erinpye 1014895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so so sorry. I've been on the other end of this- my cousin and I are like sisters and were due with our first pregnancies within 3 days of each other. She had a loss when she was almost at 12 weeks and had to watch me progress exactly where she should have been. I watched her devastation, and it broke my heart. I know how personal it feels, especially when it's such a tender issue as having a baby, but I hope you know that those who love you want it for you too, and are rooting/ praying/ crossing fingers for you. I hope you get your sticky baby very soon, and in the meantime enjoy that glass of wine! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014323 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 18:23:00 +0000 googly-eyes 1014323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs! Not much good comes from facebook! You have a wonderful attitude, but yes it's also ok to feel however you feel. Be a little selfish today, enjoy the wine, and know that we are all rooting for you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014293 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 18:06:38 +0000 Sprite 1014293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry @NorCalWayfarer! Thinking of you and hope you enjoy that wine tonight! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014187 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 17:13:46 +0000 mlm2934 1014187@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@NorCalWayfarer: that quote got me through the first days after MC :heart: that quote. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014151 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:52:40 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1014151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LovelyPlum: That's exactly why I love you girls. I can't keep it together 24/7. And the bees are always there to tell me its ok to cry and have a glass (or four) of wine ;-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014150 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:51:54 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 1014150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>*hugs* Facebook was the DEVIL when we were TTC. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014138 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:45:50 +0000 LovelyPlum 1014138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@NorCalWayfarer: good girl :) but when you need a shoulder to cry on, know we are here. Or a pity party...we throw good ones of those, too ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014137 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:45:13 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1014137@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Torchwood: I try :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014127 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:40:42 +0000 Torchwood 1014127@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@NorCalWayfarer: Sounds like you have a wonderful attitude about it. I think I'm going to remind myself of that quote as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014109 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:31:32 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1014109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LovelyPlum: @FutureMrsMcK: @Cherrybee: @Mrs.Someone: @Torchwood: @runnerd: @Mrs. 64: Thanks ladies for the kind words and validation. It is hard and I empathize with what you've all had to unfortunately experience as well. </p> <p>@FutureMrsMcK: Yes, I think "walloped with an announcement" is a good way to put it ;-) </p> <p>I'm excited for everyone's announcements, I really am. I also have to keep in mind the quote "Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." I don't know what my cousin has had to endure thus far with her pregnancy so I can just be happy for her and supportive. But I have to allow myself the opportunity to grieve and feel pain. But then brush my sorry butt off and stand up and keep going :-) And continue to practice gratitude. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1014082 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 16:15:36 +0000 mrs. 64 1014082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry. Your feelings are perfectly normal. Thinking of you. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013896 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 15:00:01 +0000 mlm2934 1013896@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's hard!!! :( every announcement stings for me. I had to listen to one at a party we had last weekend while the girl told me that is was their first month trying, and she was 6 weeks. Those are the ones that are hardest for me, carrying the weight that hardly anyone knows we had a baby at all, while others get to announce and share the joy and everything ends up fine for them.</p> <p>*hugs* it's been 5 months since our loss, and it gets easier but that pain doesn't go away. I am definitely in the camp of feeling our feelings it is legitimizing, that those lost babies were real. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013867 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:53:15 +0000 Torchwood 1013867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Been there as well. My cousin is pregnant with her fourth, and her due date is about 2 weeks after mine would have been. It's really hard some days, even though I feel so much better about the m/c than I did at first. I didn't hide her on fb because she almost never posts about her pregnancies, but she did post something the other day about how many weeks she was. That hit me way harder than expected because I'd managed to avoid thinking about how far along I would be by now. Since her edd is so close to mine, I couldn't help but know. </p> <p>I agree with the others that you have *every right* to hide her for as long as you need. Take care of yourself first. Hope you enjoy your wine and cheese and all, and lots of hugs. You're not alone and we all care! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013819 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:37:13 +0000 Mrs.Someone 1013819@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been there too, you have every right to be emotional! Don't hesitate to hide people from your feed when needed. You can always visit their page when you're up for it and curious what they are up to. I've hidden just about every pregnant woman or new mom because I need to choose when I see those updates. I even unfriended a few old acquaintances that I'll never see again. Its rough! Hang in there my friend, we're here for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013803 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:32:44 +0000 Cherrybee 1013803@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh no, I'm so sorry. I've totally been there. A friend announced her surprise pregnancy (with a guy she had not long started seeing) a few weeks after my early m/c. There is no rhyme or reason to it and it just so unfair. Hugs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013768 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:18:12 +0000 lovehoneybee 1013768@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Big hugs sweets. </p> <p>A few weeks after my loss I found out that my next door neighbor was pregnant with #4...with the exact same EDD we had had. I sat down in the kitchen and sobbed. </p> <p>It's not fair, and it's absolutely okay to not be okay all the time, especially when walloped with an announcement. </p> <p>I found a lot of piece in wine and unpasteurized cheese...I hope you will too ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013752 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:13:20 +0000 LovelyPlum 1013752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh darling-big hugs. I have been there, and it is awful. I pretended to have it together, but it was such a lie, even to myself. Just know that however you react is fine. It is ok to be sad, it is ok to be happy, it is ok to go between the two. And know that you are not alone :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013751 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:12:45 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1013751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jhd: @lilteacherbee: @MrsCB: @Mrsbells: @pui: @Mrsjets: Thanks ladies :-) I'm just having a little pitty party for myself. I think wine, soft cheese, and sushi sound like a perfect plan!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013737 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 14:08:53 +0000 Mrsjets 1013737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs </p> <p>I'm sorry you're struggling, but it hasn't been that long - don't be too hard on yoursrlf. I'm still thinking of you. I hope you get your BFP and sticky baby soon. </p> <p>And the wine, soft cheese and even sushi sound perfect tonight! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013699 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:58:59 +0000 pui 1013699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( *hugs* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013656 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:47:43 +0000 Mrsbells 1013656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>&lt;3 Hugs &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013649 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:46:28 +0000 ShootingStar 1013649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have some wine and sushi and unpasteurized brie :). And anything else self-indulgent that might make you feel better. I went out with a friend for sushi right after I found out about my loss and it somehow did help a little. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013636 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:41:17 +0000 lilteacherbee 1013636@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs! :heart:</p> <p>I ignored my Facebook for a good 2 months after my m/c because it was so hard. A close friend who also happened to be married to DH's cousin (so she was family as well) had her baby 2 days after my m/c. I just couldn't handle it at that point.</p> <p>It's totally okay to have those feelings!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013629 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:39:58 +0000 jhd 1013629@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>hugs :heart: i haven't been through a loss, but i do know what it's like to have family members announce pregnancies when you want so badly to be pregnant yourself!!</p> <p>hang in there. &amp; enjoy that wine tonight! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/thought-i-had-it-under-control#post-1013597 Tue, 13 Aug 2013 13:33:01 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 1013597@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just found out via Facebook that my cousin is pregnant. We just experienced early pregnancy loss last month and I thought I had my emotions under control. I guess it's one thing to have acquaintances announce it via FB and another to have a family member. Just another reminder, close to home, about our "failure." </p> <p>Also kind of funny -- she hasn't told us cousins, my parents (her aunt &amp; uncle) or my grandmother, to my knowledge.</p> <p>Just wanted to vent a bit. I know there are quite a few other bees here dealing with early pregnancy loss and/or several months of TTC. At least I can drown my sorrows in a bottle of wine tonight ;-) </p>