https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 24 Jun 2026 13:05:45 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2393537 Fri, 18 Dec 2015 12:00:06 +0000 erinpye 2393537@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I stay up way too late and take me time then. I also try and do a few things a month out with friends, a hair appointment, DH and I will take a date night or two-- anything that I get to go do sans kids counts! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2393327 Fri, 18 Dec 2015 09:30:36 +0000 Mamasig 2393327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would like "me" time but I rarely get it. Unless you count my commute time. And my children are night owls so I don't even get time in the evening. It's really not a complaint. Just a fact for this season of life. I don't think I need it though - I would just like it! But to be honest, when I'm not with my kids I often feel guilty - can't explain why but I do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2393126 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 22:29:22 +0000 gentlelunette 2393126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I do need time to myself and I struggle to get it. My husband works like crazy and when he's home, I like to spend time with him. That said, I probably get out on my own/with friends once a month 😬 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2393122 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 22:24:31 +0000 MOMTOLITTLEB 2393122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so glad you were able to connect with each other, moms need to support each other. I don't need to tell another mom how much I appreciate my son! They feel the same way and I have met the occasional mom who cares about nothing but her kids but most of us crave the balance of including some time for ourselves. I voted that it's not that hard for me- most of the time. My husband is really good about giving me time and we share most chores and my son goes to bed early, so I'll usually spend the first hour doing stuff around the house or working if I have to, then after that it's my relaxing time. I really need it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392622 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 15:01:58 +0000 Chuckles 2392622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely need me time, even if it's just running errands by myself or having time to do nothing but read or knit. When I was working part-time, this was actually pretty easy to come by because my parents who watch S could stay slightly later or come slightly earlier than I really needed to work. And I didn't feel guilty at all because I was home most of the time.<br /> Now that I've gone back to work full time, I feel like any non work time should be spent with S. And I can't really get time before or after work because of when daycare ends. Plus DH usually doesn't get home from work until at least 7. The kicker is that S is in that obnoxious stage when he still sort of needs a nap or he'll be a mess by 7, but when he does nap he's up until 9 easily. So, yeah, no me time right now :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392612 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 14:59:19 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 2392612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do need it (especially now), but don't get it super often. DH and I work opposite schedules so if he is home and available to watch the kids, I usually need to be working. Sometimes I get to run errands alone (Costco, Target, post office) and that's nice. I usually have some sort of a girls night (just an hour or two) with my girlfriends once a month. </p> <p>More often than not, my "unwind time" means running errands with either my 3.5 year old or my 2 year old, but having just one of them feels like a vacation compared to running errands with all 3. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392584 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 14:47:53 +0000 Raindrop 2392584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@snowjewelz: Yes that could be it too!!! I must admit before I had my second I really missed babies... I totally forgot *how* hard it was ... until I actually had a baby again. Haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392514 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 14:25:35 +0000 snowjewelz 2392514@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Raindrop: Or they miss that baby stage so much they can't imagine why you wouldn't want to treasure every, single, second :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392495 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 14:19:46 +0000 Raindrop 2392495@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you again everyone for the comments! I loved reading all of them. I'm glad for this community.</p> <p>@snowjewelz: Haha good question. I asked her. The two other ladies she talked to at work is a mom with 2 grown kids (our age) and the other one has two middle school age kids. I told my co-worker that they probably just forgot how hard it was!! Haha. Now that their kids are older... they probably have no trouble finding time because their kids can just do things independently now. That's my theory. I'm not sure about the other people she talked to. </p> <p>@smocks: One of the things I told my co-workers was dishes too! Heck we ate off paper plates... longer than I would like to admit (a few months and still maybe 1-2 times a week) just to get a handle on the chores. I feel you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392142 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 11:15:26 +0000 smocks 2392142@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I absolutely need time for myself, it's a non-negotiable. If I'm stressed, I make everyone else in my household feel stressed, so I make myself a priority. I WOH, fwiw.</p> <p>Biggest time/sanity savers:<br /> -Grocery shopping during my lunch break. This way I don't have to schlep 1 or 2 kids with me to the store since DH has such a variable schedule. We have 2 work fridge/freezers and I just put one bag in each until I leave for the day.<br /> -Going on walks during my lunch break. If I sit at my desk all day everyday, I will go nuts. Even though it's not exhausting exercise, it's at least something and gets me outside and enjoying nature unencumbered by anyone else.<br /> -Not caring about how clean the house is. I think I do dishes... 3 times a week? It's gross, sure, but I would rather spend my evenings with my kids, and later evenings with DH or watching trashy tv to clear my head than the misery that is washing dishes. I've stopped feeling guilty about it unless we have company. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2392050 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 10:34:09 +0000 MK0180 2392050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm super introverted and so being around people just zaps the strength out of me. I do need time to recharge but it has become difficult to do so. Partly due to guilt and the other part is just lack of time. When we put DS down for the night then we have maybe an hour or two to ourselves but then that usually involves getting dishes done, picking up and then maybe watching a show. I want to be able to just go somewhere and read a book and drink a glass of wine. That's all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2391985 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 10:05:30 +0000 erinbaderin 2391985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely definitely. Some of the 'time to myself' I get is during my commute - not the #1 way I'd choose to spend my time but I listen to podcasts so it's kind of relaxing. I'm also lucky that my son is usually asleep by 7:30 so we have some time each evening and my husband is always happy to go play video games if I just want to chill and watch Vanderpump Rules. On the weekends I find it harder because I feel bad asking my husband to take our son by himself so I can do nothing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2391968 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 10:00:25 +0000 snowjewelz 2391968@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Who is she talking to that would call her selfish for wanting me time?! I feel so bad that she was shamed for feeling that way until she talked to you!</p> <p>I def have a really hard time to take time for myself, and often I let resentment build up inside if I see DH having time to himself and I don't. But I do it to myself; even if DH tells me to go do something for myself, I feel so guilty not spending time with DD b/c I already WOH all week and nights/weekends are all I have. </p> <p>I have to continually remind myself that DD needs a happy mom too, not just a mom that is with her every chance she gets. </p> <p>This is def a goal for the new year! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2391831 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 09:00:29 +0000 Trailmix 2391831@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I enjoy time to myself and I get it once the kids go down at night and on the occasion my husband will take them both so I can meet girlfriends for dinner or whatever. Mine are a bit older though, which makes it easier. When they were younger it was much harder! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself/page/2#post-2391779 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 08:34:36 +0000 Adira 2391779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely need time for myself, but I"m fortunate that I get every other Friday off, so I feel like that fills my quota. Those days off (with the kids in daycare) is pure BLISS, even if I'm doing chores around the house, grocery shopping, or going to appointments. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391726 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 07:44:03 +0000 rachiecakes 2391726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I need time but it's a struggle. Husband works opposite schedule, no family or reliable sitters around.<br /> It's rare that we're all together as a family so I feel guilty when I take off to do something for myself but occasionally I need it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391709 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 07:16:49 +0000 brownepiano 2391709@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted that I find time because I am only pt WOH. Nap time is me time every day (or work time but I enjoy the chance to use my brain). I also enjoy my job and getting out of the house alone, even though I'm working it feels great. However actual me time that is not nap time or work time is rare. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391703 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 06:57:50 +0000 catomd00 2391703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't really need a lot of it on a regular basis. I don't consider time for chores me time. I get a lot of time alone at work, on my commute, etc. so when I'm home with DD I don't want to lose precious time. I definitely enjoy going out alone or with a friend for a few hours from time to time but I don't crave it. I totally see how others do though! I think I needed it more when DD was smaller but at that point wasn't comfortable enough to leave her.</p> <p>Oh and I'd never feel or tell someone they were selfish for needing it!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391691 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 06:26:17 +0000 Pumuckl 2391691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I def. need alone time. Basically it is every evening after our first is in bed (the second is in bed before that). So from about 9pm to 11:45pm is me time. I don't really do anything but watch TV, veg on the couch with a tablet or some crochet though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391682 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 05:25:20 +0000 wrkbrk 2391682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Raindrop: I voted yes I need time and no it's not hard to find it but that's only bc DW and I have I have overlapping maternity leave and our three week old sleeps a lot. So we each get out of the house once a day to do something alone (even if it's just Walgreens and the Starbucks drive through!). I'm sure this nice little set up will all change soon though ... :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391670 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 03:53:22 +0000 ScarletBegonia 2391670@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm very lucky that my son is in daycare for the 4 days a week that I work, but I get 2 weeks holidays every 10 weeks or so, plus a 7 week break that I'm in right now (summer break in Australia)...teaching schedule really doesn't get any better than in Australia! So, during those 2 week breaks he still goes to daycare for at least 3 days (if I'm honest usually all 4), and I laze around the house, run errands, go to movies by myself (my FAVOURITE activity) and generally unwind from the craziness of the previous term. Its so good for my mental health. I love being a mom, but I think I have less tolerance for the day to day than most... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391666 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 03:38:34 +0000 Cherrybee 2391666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've come to realise that I need time to do all my household tasks, time for myself, time with friends and leisure with DH. Its impossible to get all of that! I make time where I can and try to balance all of my needs with the demands on my time -work, child, extended family - but mostly I try to remind myself that this wont be forever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391659 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 02:49:30 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2391659@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Now that I'm a mom, I realize how important it is for me to have time for myself. For me, it's a necessity. The first few years (and my daughter is now 3.5, so it's ongoing) is tough. But it was much harder when she was a baby. I think that most of the people that automatically comment about "just enjoying the younger years" get help in some way. I say this because everyone that I know that has said this either has 1) older kids and they don't remember how it was and 2) when their kids were babies, they had family close-by to help. Those comments used to get to me as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391650 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 02:00:30 +0000 anonysquire 2391650@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't need or want time for myself with my first. I didn't leave my baby for a second for her first year. Well except 6 weeks of a couple night shifts. Bad idea. After my second and his 9 months of colic, I decided I might need some time. So I got a gym pass that has a daycare and occasionally go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391643 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 01:41:12 +0000 NorCalWayfarer 2391643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A very apt post for me right now -- currently struggling with this. DH is really good at taking time for himself, but me not so much. I really need to make a point of scheduling some me-time in for the week, but it's hard between work, commuting, chores, and wanting to spend time with my 18 month old, DH and our friends :-/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391641 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 01:24:16 +0000 LindsayLou 2391641@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am struggling with this immensely right now. My daughter is 4 months. I just started working again, 30 hours a week, as a nanny, taking my daughter with me. I'm grateful that I get to have her with me, and it's nice to bring in some money. But not having time to myself is exhausting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391638 Thu, 17 Dec 2015 01:17:07 +0000 lemondrop 2391638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We give each other "me time" sometimes just a trip to Target by myself is all I need. Going for a haircut once every two months is great, but sometimes he just takes the boys to the gym with him so I can catch up on things. Sometimes I take the boys out so he gets a break, or I tell him to go enjoy a beer after work. </p> <p>I thrive in doing my work, but I don't really count it as me time since I am usually helping my students problem solve, and that is hardly relaxing, just more mentally and socially stimulating for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391603 Wed, 16 Dec 2015 23:28:55 +0000 Nutella 2391603@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely need me time! And I mean time apart from running to the markets/shops. My DH works crazy hours &amp; im a SAHM currently with no family or help nearby, so I ask DH to take LO out on the weekend and I'll go out for my own wanderings - coffee and a book, pedicure or meet a non-baby related friend! Sometimes I'll also clean the house because I actually like doing it, but just don't get the chance. </p> <p>I found the hardest part was actually disciplining myself to give myself the me-time...so many times I often decide to go along with DH &amp; LO because whatever they are doing sounds so fun! But we realised that helps noone and just makes me more wound up by the wbd if Sunday night! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391600 Wed, 16 Dec 2015 23:24:42 +0000 PurplePeony 2391600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted #1 but I think it needs some qualification -- I definitely need time to myself and I do get "alone time" but not necessarily "me time." My office is very small and my boss works from home a lot, so if my co-worker is out, I'm all alone that day. And we work overlapping schedules so there are always at least a couple hours each day when I'm there and she's not. And my DH has to work a couple evenings per week, so I'm after DD goes to bed, I'm alone until he gets back. So I DO have time during my week without anyone actively requiring my time and attention. But those times, I'm either working or doing chores or collapsed on the couch because I'm too exhausted to do the ninety-billion things on my list.</p> <p>So, I rarely get the kind of time I need. I don't have many close friends in this city, and they all have kids of their own, so girls' nights or brunches or whatever don't happen much. And I find it really hard to get out and do things like shopping (for fun, not for necessities like groceries) because as a WOHM I want to maximize my time with DD. But by the time she is in bed, stores are pretty much closing. And weekends just get away from me, though once in a blue moon I get out while DD is napping. It's hard, and it can be lonely, and even when I do get out I feel guilty not being with my family so I don't really enjoy it. I don't know the answer, but it sucks sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/time-for-yourself#post-2391592 Wed, 16 Dec 2015 23:03:43 +0000 Mrs Green Grass 2391592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: similar for us. We kind of divide the weekend so we both have some time on our own (and some together). </p>