https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 07 May 2026 06:19:12 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2199068 Thu, 04 Jun 2015 12:58:53 +0000 sarac 2199068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I think about this a LOT in my marriage. I'm the chatty one, and my husband is relatively quiet, but he loves to tell me about what he's working on or reading about. Our interests only overlap to a certain degree, so often I'm not actually all that into what he's so eager to tell me about. But I always do my best to try to take an interest in it, because I know it matters to him, and I love seeing what he's into, and because it's just a fun way to connect. I try to never turn away a 'bid' for connection, and I think that it really contributes positively to our marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198863 Thu, 04 Jun 2015 10:49:11 +0000 MOMTOLITTLEB 2198863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I remember looking at my husband while he was talking about football or some other nonsense and all I could say was "How can you think about anything besides this baby that has taken over my whole life??" </p> <p>Things are much more normal now. We still don't share all of the same interests but we're able to focus on each other more. I think it's an ongoing balance. I try to listen to his stuff but sometimes I will let him know that it's getting to be too many details of something I'm not super interested in, just give me the basic point! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198545 Thu, 04 Jun 2015 08:08:34 +0000 fuzzypeaches 2198545@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>God yes! I was always feeling so irritated by chatter about golf or crossfit or anything lol. But I am trying to make more of an effort because u know it helps our relationship when I show interest in things that are important to him! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198429 Thu, 04 Jun 2015 05:49:57 +0000 Adira 2198429@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely think this is normal. After I had my first, I had trouble talking to ANYONE about anything not baby related! It gets easier with time though, at least for me, so hopefully the same is true for you. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198413 Thu, 04 Jun 2015 05:07:54 +0000 mediagirl 2198413@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's totally normal. After a long day sometimes all I want is silence not mindless chit chat. A baby makes that feeling so much stronger. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198205 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 17:47:43 +0000 rachiecakes 2198205@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>haha YES! DH tends to give long-winded answers to simple questions and it makes me crazy. I was asking him if he was going out tonight at dinner and he started telling me about his friends schedule, etc. I was like TLDR; please get to the point - you going out or not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2198197 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 17:14:55 +0000 macintosh 2198197@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so glad it's not just me! DH is very understanding, but I'm still struggling not to cut him off or tune him out constantly. I imagine it will get easier as we adjust to being a family of 3. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2195815 Mon, 01 Jun 2015 21:08:02 +0000 Mama Bird 2195815@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh yeah, that's normal and it passes. You're exhausted from caring for a newborn, you're always on call caring for him, and it's hard to have the energy to carry on a conversation. About anything. Even if you'd normally be super interested. I'm sure it'll get better when you start getting more sleep! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2195785 Mon, 01 Jun 2015 20:33:14 +0000 Mae 2195785@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep. My husband just finished his MBA and he really loved most of his classes. He was working full time and going to school at night and I was home with a baby all day and night alone. He'd get home and want to tell me alllll about whatever they were talking about in class and 1) I don't find most business stuff interesting, and 2) I was worn out from a long day with the baby and I just wanted to sit quietly and not talk or interact with anyone. </p> <p>But I remember that I read this article once (no clue where now) about how one huge predictor of happiness in a relationship and future divorce is whether or not couples respond to each others' "bids." The researchers found that when one person reaches out to try to talk to the other and that person blows them off it is the sort of thing that makes the other person either stop trying to talk to them and/or become upset with their partner. The couples that responded to more of their partners' bids are the ones that stayed happily married more than those who responded to less bids. </p> <p>That doesn't mean I was always able to act interested when I wasn't. I've not been my best self/wife this past year for sure. But I really tried to participate in the convo as much as possible because I do think it is important for the long term happiness of our marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2195764 Mon, 01 Jun 2015 20:16:30 +0000 maybebaby 2195764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are not alone! My son is 2 now, but especially those first few months - and not just with DH--I found it near impossible to focus on (or even feign interest in) anything anyone was saying, as my mind was constantly on the baby. I found with DH it was helpful for us both if I articulated my feelings - "sorry honey, I am having trouble focusing on your story because baby is ___ or I am worried about ___." It acknowledges that he might be feeling ignored but justifies why you are feeling that way. I promise as baby gets older the ability to focus on other things will change! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/too-tired-to-listen-to-dh#post-2195762 Mon, 01 Jun 2015 20:12:55 +0000 macintosh 2195762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know if it's because of my DH's personality (a little childlike from his brain injury) or if it's just me, but I find I have no mental energy to listen DH talk much of the time. He asks a lot if questions, kind of like a kid, and he sometimes just wants to chat about random stuff (something he read on Facebook, a story from his last that I've heard before).</p> <p>I find myself unable to focus on what he's a saying because I'm always thinking about the baby. At my worst, I get really annoyed. Has this happened to anyone else, especially with a newborn? </p>