https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 03 Jun 2026 22:40:57 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2227286 Sun, 05 Jul 2015 23:57:28 +0000 daniellemybelle 2227286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Myicitygirl: Thanks for sharing your experience! That sounds exhausting. Thankfully the flights are shorter for us. A 5.5 hour flight with two LOs has to be rough!</p> <p>@2littlepumpkins: I am hoping we will end up closer to family by the time we have two LOs that are both over lap child age... because I can't imagine! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2227048 Sun, 05 Jul 2015 16:11:50 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2227048@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: Re: reciprocal visits.. My mom comes out a lot and she always pays for her flight and stays with us and often buys us dinners out.. we're very lucky. When LO was really little she even babysat and gave us date days. I know it's not "fair" in that we pay a lot less but we just can't afford more than we already do. I'd do the same for my LO so I guess I don't feel too bad! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2227047 Sun, 05 Jul 2015 16:10:01 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2227047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We'll be paying about $1800 every time to fly. Driving is not an option. We have flown with LO as a lap child and not (even before 2) so the cost has changed but now she's going on 3 so it's about $1800 every time. LO2 is due in October and we'll probably fly with him as a lap child until he turns 2. The thought of buying four tickets makes me feel like freaking out!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226978 Sun, 05 Jul 2015 13:39:41 +0000 Myicitygirl 2226978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: we moved from the east coast (where both sets of families live) to the west coast in october 2012. Since then, we have been back to visit 5 times - every 6 months except for when LO2 was born. It gets really exhausting, even with taking steps to make the trip as comfortable and convenient as possible. We try to avoid holiday travel times, fly direct with seats for both LOs regardless of age (SO worth every penny not to have to wrangle with a baby or toddler for 5.5 hours each way), rent a car, rent a 2 or 3 bedroom furnished apartment through AirBnb or Homeaway. Besides the planning and headache of flying, it is really hard to live out of suitcases and deal with jet lag and routines being thrown out the window. And running around trying to spend time with everyone and feeling guilt about taking away the only grandkids on both sides. </p> <p>So after our 16 day marathon trip this past April (NYC and Toronto), I decided I need a break and we are not going back for 18 months, for FIL's 80th birthday in October 2016. </p> <p>My in laws agreed to come visit us for thanksgiving (they are retired and mostly sit around the house). At some point it will be too hard for them to travel cross country, so then we will back to making the frequent trips. But it will be easier when the LOs are older. </p> <p>It takes time to adjust to being far from family, but it does get easier and life gets so busy with kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226812 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 23:56:44 +0000 daniellemybelle 2226812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: I checked into Amtrak, hoping it would be an amazing solution... it's just barely cheaper than a plane ticket and TWENTY EIGHT HOURS. No way! Thanks for the suggestion, though, haha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226809 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 23:42:43 +0000 daniellemybelle 2226809@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not going to be able to reply to everyone, but one thing many of you mentioned that I wanted to respond to: Visits will definitely be reciprocal! We are very lucky in that regard that both sets of parents are able and willing and for that we are grateful. </p> <p>Still, in both cases we have siblings and on DH's side we have nieces and nephews we'd like to see - not just our parents. So, I want to make sure we go visit because it is not feasible for all the family members to fly to see us. Especially while LO is still a lap child, it will be cheaper for us to go to them. Can anyone here forge a birth certificate!?!?!</p> <p>My mom &amp; I are hoping to get to see each other about once per month. That is a lot more often than most of you are seeing your family that are the same distance (or even closer). I feel like we are going to have to get creative! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226806 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 23:37:00 +0000 daniellemybelle 2226806@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone for your input. I have avoided coming back to this thread because I am really, really bummed out about this. :crying: </p> <p>I think I have devised a good plan, though. When we fly to one family's city, DH will return for work and LO &amp; I will rent a car and drive the 7 hours to the other family's city. My grandparents are halfway, so we can stop there and see them too! Then we'll return from the other city. Only have to pay for one flight to see both! Perfect, right?</p> <p>Only drawbacks to that plan is that DH won't always get to come, and I worry that LO will be worn out from the first family visit for the second visit. I don't know that it is ideal to do trips back-to-back for that reason... but it is better than nothing.</p> <p>Another thing I am trying to decide - Should we pay for 3 flights at Christmas so LO &amp; I can visit my parents for longer, and DH can meet up with us? Or should we save the money and drive the 12-13 hours? We'd probably stop and stay in a hotel but it is still so much cheaper than 3 holiday season tickets. Honestly, LO &amp; I could drive and DH could fly one way and it would still be cheaper, but I don't know if I can do that drive with her - and stay in a hotel - by myself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226540 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 12:03:20 +0000 MamaG 2226540@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For the holidays, we don't travel. Any and all family is welcome to our home. For me it's important to be at home and establishing our own family traditions. And my husband now has a job where he can't take time from October - January. Which just further enforces our lack of travel.</p> <p>We'd love to travel to them other times of the year, but honestly it's just hard. I don't want to use all of our vacation time just visiting family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226537 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 11:54:42 +0000 yoursilverlining 2226537@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My in-laws used to be a cross-country flight, which we did several times a year as there wasn't really any other option but to fly.</p> <p>Airline miles or travel reward credit cards help a lot, so does traveling just before or after peak holiday. We have flown ON Christmas a few times because it was considerably cheaper than flying before. Same for the week after Christmas. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226499 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 09:51:03 +0000 DesertDreams88 2226499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have lived basically across the country for 5 years. Until this year we used to fly to their locations twice a year (once for christmas and once for summer) In the 5 years, each set of parents has only come out here twice... total. To be fair, we are teachers so we get way more time off than they do, but we also get paid way less than we do. Each trip for just the 2 of us is about $500, so we regularly saved about $2000 a year to do this. It was a budget prioirity.</p> <p>Now that most of our friends have moved out of our hometowns and we have LO1 on the way, we will be pushing to make the trips more even... we fly there, you fly here. Another change we have already made is dropping the Christmas flights and doing just summer, bc Xmas flights are so expensive and you usually run into snow issues somewhere.</p> <p>We also have started suggesting family vacations some of which involve our "home regions" and some of which are halfway between us. So it's not just family time but vacation time. We've done 4 of these in 5 years.</p> <p>Last idea, that depends on your locations and amount of time off:<br /> We save a TON of money by doing our trips back to back. We in AZ fly one way to CT, then one way to WI, then one way back to AZ. It is always, always cheaper than 2 roundtrips and WI &amp; CT are way closer to each other than AZ. This also only works if you are able to take off enough time (about 10 days total??). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226389 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 04:00:05 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 2226389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's important not to set a precedent of you always traveling to them. Make sure they come to you too. I was the first person in my family to move away and it took a couple years for them to come my way because I went theirs. Flights are expensive and vacation days are precious, so if you are the only one making the effort it can cause resentment.</p> <p>Also there might be some holidays where it is just you, your husband, and your DD. Having some traditions of you own and things to look forward to will make the distance easier.</p> <p>There are also times when we see our families without each other because of cost and/or time. It sucks to leave the other person behind, but we can't always swing two plane tickets. Those times are usually just long weekend visits, not vacations with family.</p> <p>We have planned vacations with our families too. We went to Disney World with my dad and siblings, and to Alaska with his mom and siblings. We don't like to use all our vacation days going back home, so it's nice when we can see our family and go somewhere new too.</p> <p>I won't lie, being so far away was really hard on me the first year. I did get use to it and now it's normal. I talk to my mom all the time and we are still really close. Now that I'm expecting my first baby though I definitely feel a desire to move back. I'm not sure what the future looks like, but I don't think we'll be 1000 miles away from our families forever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2226386 Sat, 04 Jul 2015 02:46:27 +0000 lemondrop 2226386@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are close, but my husband's family is on the opposite coast. We usually see them about 3 times a year- they come to us once (usually my MIL flys out one additional time alone), we go to them once, and we meet them somewhere once. We also try to plan a conference in one of the trips, that way we can go somewhere fun, write it off, and give the grandparents time/have child care while we get continuing education. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225991 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 11:49:13 +0000 msplatypus 2225991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live far from family, also it is just very expensive to travel from where we live because it is so cut off. So we don't, like almost ever. Even before lo. I'm hoping we will try when she's older but for now it doesn't seem worth it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225891 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 08:42:06 +0000 Rockies11 2225891@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My ILs live a 4 hour flight away. Before we had kids and when we had 1 lapchild we went all the time - like 6 or 7 times a year for one reason or another, including holidays, weddings, etc. It was stressful because my husband's parents are divorced, so we were moving back and forth between them and other family members pretty much every day and everyone was always mad we weren't spending enough time with them, multiplied by 1000 when we had our first. Since we have had our second, we haven't gone and my husband decided that we aren't going to go this year for Christmas. Since we have gone less, they have started coming here more, which is a lot easier because they get to visit for as long as they want, and we're not constantly being criticized for not spending enough time with each person. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225865 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 07:29:23 +0000 travellingbee 2225865@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Luckily for us, my parents moved across the country to be close to us a few years ago, so we only have to travel to visit one side of the family. ILs are about 8-9 hours drive. We've never driven it and go 2-3 times a year in SWA miles. But now that LO is over 2 and we have another in the way, the plan is start driving and going for longer but fewer times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225841 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 06:21:46 +0000 sslm 2225841@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're actually visiting the in-laws right now and it was a 15 hour drive. It wasn't as bad as we thought it would be! It's our first time doing it with LO. Our plan is to do the drive once a year in the summer and the rest of the time have them come to us. We're staying 10 days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225840 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 06:17:05 +0000 ladybee 2225840@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's so hard. We don't have funds for flying so we would probably drive it once for the holiday season. Where we are people rent vans and drive to Myrtle Beach or Hilton ahead (13ish hours) all the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225821 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 04:00:30 +0000 looch 2225821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband has set up all kinds of alerts for airline flights...do you have several options for airports near you at all? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225817 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 03:13:47 +0000 BSB 2225817@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live in Seattle and both of our families live in Philly. </p> <p>We've been out here for almost 7 years.<br /> What has helped us was getting an Alaska Air and US airways credit card. Both of them had a companion ticket deal. So we would pay full price for one adult and the companion would pay about $119 to fly (different airline had different prices). Oh, this companion voucher was an annual thing so we would have to decide which trip to use it for. For a round trip flight from WA to PA, it would cost about $500 each person. So the companion ticket really saves us money.</p> <p>Oh, there is an Alaska air airplane hub in Seattle and a U.S. air hub in Philly so usually those two airlines usually have the lowest prices for flights. Oh, also, the flights between both cities were non-stop. Long at 5-6 hrs each but non-stop. </p> <p>We use the Alaska air for Christmas trips because Alaska is the only airline with an climate controlled cargo hold and we can take our two dogs home with us for $100 each. Our Christmas trips are usually 10 days or longer and it was cheaper to take the dogs with us than to board them at a kennel. </p> <p>Then US air for our summer trips or other mid year trip, if we can fit it and afford it. Well... Bad news is American Airlines and US Air merged and unfortunately got rid of the companion ticket. :( They replaced it with a $100 discount. It's better than nothing but still annoying.</p> <p>With the twins arriving, we'll no longer take our dogs with us for Christmas since we'll be paying for a 3rd seat. Plus, I think we would be crazy to take 2 infants and 2 dogs home. </p> <p>Oh, the first year we moved out to Seattle, we went home for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Don't do it. We were both exhausted from the trips. It didn't feel like we unpacked and it felt like we were just at the airport. </p> <p>We are hoping to move back east after the twins arrive so hopefully we won't have many cross country trips in our future.</p> <p>Oh, one of the perks of our credit cards with the airlines is usually one checked bag is free for each person. So that helps. Oh, another perk is early boarding.</p> <p>Oh, other travel tips, we usually stayed at least a week and flew on Wednesdays or Tuesdays. Red eyes are usually the cheapest. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225813 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 02:01:36 +0000 78h2o 2225813@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I live in MD, my parents live in OR, and my sister lives in TX. I usually end up flying 2-3x per year. It's expensive, but usually I can use FF miles or a companion ticket (I have a credit card that issues one per year) for at least one of the trips. Often it's just me and my dughter(s), as my husband doesn't have very much leave (and it's also cheaper that way). </p> <p>Next week I am flying cross-country by myself with my 2.5 year old and 6 week old! Wish me luck!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225808 Fri, 03 Jul 2015 01:39:58 +0000 lamariniere 2225808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Both of our families live in different countries from us and my family is on another continent. Yes, it is expensive and yes, we will also fly with our youngest LO as a lap infant until we have to start paying. We always try to combo family visits with vacation. This summer we are going to the U.S. for the first time in 3 years for a wedding, to visit friends and to visit my family. So while I am crying over the expense (we could have such an awesome vacation somewhere exotic!), I'm also glad that we get to see new places while visiting family. We try to travel in the off season when possible. We are also not so into holidays so we don't feel obligated to travel during the peak holiday season. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225499 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 18:38:42 +0000 regberadaisy 2225499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is Amtrak an option? My family is 6-7 pre kids and we go a few times a year for a weekend. With a 14 hour drive I would probably plan around major holidays to extend the stay. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225497 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 18:35:51 +0000 avivoca 2225497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our drive is not as bad as yours (5 hours), but we alternated Thanksgiving and Christmas. It sucked. Now we usually only see my inlaws 2-3 times per year because we can't make the drive for a weekend visit and they won't come here. We FT them most days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225438 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 17:13:02 +0000 travelgirl1 2225438@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Flying is the only option we have and is soooo expensive! These days we just don't really go (last trip was two years ago). Cost plus emotional trauma of trying to fit everyone in, feeling guilty that it's never enough and all the goodbyes every time really put me off. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225433 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 17:07:20 +0000 JMOM 2225433@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We moved 2 days drive from our families last year. We drove to see them over Christmas last year but it was a fiasco - bad weather driving back, stomach bug and then the flu. I told my husband that we wouldn't be doing that anytime soon. I already have flights for Thanksgiving but we'll stay home for Christmas. I think we may just switch each year or stay home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225418 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 16:48:00 +0000 Jess1483 2225418@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ILs are a 14-hour drive away. We go once a year for a week in the summer (and we take the car for our own convenience, although we've also done the flying thing), and they visit us 3ish times a year. We won't drive that far on winter roads with little ones, and holiday air travel is too expensive. It's not ideal, but it is what it is. My family is local, so we celebrate holidays with them. It's not totally fair, but DH's family understands. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/traveling-to-visit-family-far-away#post-2225415 Thu, 02 Jul 2015 16:45:18 +0000 daniellemybelle 2225415@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are moving 800 miles away from my family and our current city, and over 1,000 miles away from my husband's family (currently only about 400 miles away). LO is going to be 2 in October and I am already overwhelmed at the cost of traveling for the holidays when she is no longer a lap child. (Yes, we will fly with her as a lap child until the day she turns 2. This is not a discussion about whether to use car seats on airplanes.) </p> <p>If we get good deals on flights, it will still be $1,000 to fly for Thanksgiving and Christmas each! Driving will be about 12 hours if we go straight to my family and I think like 17 hours or something insane to my husband's. But, man. That's a lot of money.</p> <p>What do you do? Fly? Drive? Teleport? Do you just not go? I am hoping to be able to see my family fairly regularly. I am used to seeing them every week. :bummed: </p>