https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 03 Jun 2026 14:40:20 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871799 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 11:00:17 +0000 immabeetoo 1871799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: agreed! Two options give him power but not overwhelming. Apple or clementine? Makes him happy to choose but if I just ask what fruit he wants, he gets wigged out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871684 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 07:29:42 +0000 BandDmommy 1871684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PinkElephant: I usually offer LO 2 choices. But both are options I can live with, so it's a win-win. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871630 Sat, 20 Sep 2014 23:59:41 +0000 PinkElephant 1871630@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@CherryBee: what is it about tummies and tantrums? My daughter never scratched herself, but she went through a phase around 20-22 months where when she got mad she'd say "shirt off!" And try to remove her top! :)</p> <p>Agree 100% that having words helps. My 2 year old is very verbal and (touch wood) this seems to help her avoid the seemingly senseless meltdowns. She still has plenty of demonstrations of will though - ie tossing a cup or toy down when I tell her to do/not to do something, then staring me down for a reaction. That is also frustrating!</p> <p>I need to get better about not asking questions - I think I do it because I feel less bossy, but as others have said, it invites a kid to say "no!" When I didn't actually intend to offer a choice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871293 Sat, 20 Sep 2014 13:37:48 +0000 Cherrybee 1871293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I saw a toddler have an epic tantrum in IKEA today. He was screaming and screaming, then he lifted up his shirt and started scratching violently at his tummy. I felt so sorry for his poor mum. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871131 Sat, 20 Sep 2014 08:30:38 +0000 BandDmommy 1871131@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think young 2 is tougher because they don't have their words. My LO is almost 2.5 and much better at expressing what's wrong so we avoid tantrums. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871087 Sat, 20 Sep 2014 07:16:14 +0000 hilsy85 1871087@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scg00387: I totally agree with your second point! I have tried to stop asking questions when it's not a negotiable subject--even saying " We're going to go in 5 minutes, ok?". He can then say no and it becomes a discussion. I try to just say, "we are leaving in 5 minutes! Let's get our stuff together!". etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1871022 Sat, 20 Sep 2014 05:10:49 +0000 yin 1871022@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The two's were not too bad for us. I'm currently struggling with the three's, and by struggle I really mean drowning. I feel like I'm dealing with a teenager every single day. Overall he is a great kid, but he has his moments. No is his favorite word, and boy is he stubborn. None of my previous methods work anymore. I'm completely lost. :( I really hope the four's are as wonderful as everyone says it is. If not, I don't think I'll have my sanity anymore. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870462 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 14:25:45 +0000 immabeetoo 1870462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsMccarthy: we have used something since he was little that helped a lot. If he has something he shouldn't, we ask if he wants to give it to us or if we need to take it. If he doesn't fork it over we count to three and if he doesn't give it by 3 we take it ourselves. He knows this drill very very well and it had eliminated almost all of those fights. For a while we were asking questions that weren't actually questions ("are you ready for bed?" When the only answer we were looking for was yes, but he was within reason to say no). It took a while to stop doing that but helped a lot, for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870444 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 14:18:40 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1870444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scg00387: that's a good tip too. We are trying that somewhat but perhaps we need to do so more often. It's so hard so hard when I have to take something away because he isn't supposed to play with it and he just doesn't understand and wants that thing only. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870419 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 14:03:25 +0000 immabeetoo 1870419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe we just haven't hit the big stage yet but my son tends to be diffused best if we try to voice what is frustrating him instead of just ignoring him, which is my first instinct. We have lately been trying to show him how to take deep breaths which sometimes helps too. It is hard though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870412 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 13:58:45 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1870412@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lovehoneybee: oh my gosh E sounds so much like T right now! I'm glad to know I'm not alone but hoping for both of our sanity that this stage is short. Those are great tips and I will be stealing a few of them. All of this is very hard whilst I am pregnant and trying to keep my cortisol levels down. </p> <p>I think we are dealing with a combination of newfound independence/ assertion of desires and communication that hasn't quite reached a clear level yet. I'm trying hard to be patient and not to bribe but its so hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870302 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 13:13:59 +0000 LuLu Mom 1870302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've been struggling for a month now, she turns 2 on Oct 1st. Everything is so dramatic, if she doesn't get her way watch out it's a meltdown. She's starting hitting her head when she's mad too which scares me a lot. I do my best to walk away (although my kid is very persistent and will FOLLOW me screaming to show me she's still upset.) Timeouts work if we catch the fit in the beginning, I send her to her room ad she's allowed to come out when she's not crying and is ready to apologize. But no use in trying a timeout if it goes too far, she doesn't care.</p> <p>It's stressful, bedtime is the biggest struggle for us right now, she all of a sudden hates her bed. So she's been falling asleep in the living room and we transport her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870212 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 12:26:27 +0000 lovehoneybee 1870212@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh my god, Evan screamed for like hour this morning because, god forbid we not let him wear his favorite (pee-soaked) sweatshirt to bed, which racheted up when I was annoyed with D not moving the thing out of his sight and put it in the washer, and kept on when we tried to put dry PJs on him. </p> <p>And we cycled through a whole #reasonsmytoddleriscrying post a few nights ago. He asked for applesauce, then screamed no and started to cry and threw it on the ground (after grabbing it from my hand). Same thing with a piece of bread, milk and blueberries (after I had filled his bottle and washed the berries, of course). and of course D was still at work. That night I skipped a bath, pushed him through brushing his teeth and putting on a diaper and PJs (the dark bruises on my arms and on my hip can attest to the mood he was in--namely, kicking me. Or bicycling his legs wildly and I just happened to be in the kick-zone--he wasn't TRYING to kick ME, I was just in the way but determined to get him dressed and the lights off because my patience was snapping and I didn't want to yell at him. </p> <p>Normally we just try hard to go on like the tantrum isn't happening. He's screaming about his pee-sweater and D and I are enthusing about PJs with foxes on them like we can't hear him. Then PJs with cars, then about the ABCs on his new dry sheets. Whatever we could do to distract (and change) him. And he never went back to sleep, even though he woke up around 5 this morning. But he was at least eventually distracted into a better mood--crayons, Daniel Tiger, promise of a banana. </p> <p>Normally that's what we aim for, but sometimes I just have to grit my teeth and do whatever I have to do to get through it (and give myself some room to breathe and restore my patience.)</p> <p>Sometimes we try to reason him through it/ignore it completely, but this normally happens on the weekends, when we have awake time with him and aren't rushing through very early morning exhaustion, getting out of the house on time for school/work, getting to bed, etc. We'll tell him that we'll listen to him when he uses his words, that we can't help him when he's just screaming, then we'll keep talking to each other or going about doing whatever else. Normally he'll calm himself down, and once he does we'll ask him what he wants again. We still might say no, but we'll try to offer him a substitute suggestion: bananas instead of applesauce, car PJs instead of soaked sweater, coloring instead of playing the Endless Reader game on my phone....</p> <p>Anyway, long story short: I feel ya. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870204 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 12:19:27 +0000 Mama Bird 1870204@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For us, it comes and goes. DS starts to test new boundaries, we have a week or two of bad tantrums, and then it passes until he finds new things to be upset about. The worst time turned out to be teething related though... When in doubt, I always blame the teeth :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870192 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 12:11:43 +0000 SeptMomma12 1870192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son turned 2 last week and OMG, he is suddenly so opinionated about everything. "I want Elmo cup", "I wear fire truck shirt", "I eat green plate" - things he has never cared about before. He's more likely to stand and whine incessantly when he doesn't get his way than he is to actually tantrum, but I feel your pain with the sudden change in behavior.</p> <p>We actually saw the doctor today and she said the only solution is ignoring it, but that's a lot easier for her to say when she hasn't been listening to it all morning :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870100 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 11:21:41 +0000 autumnlove 1870100@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our worst tantrums were around 16-20 months. Two hasn't been as terrible as I expected but I think that is because she can usually tell us what is wrong. We still get some BAD tantrums but definitely not like it was when she was 16-20 months old. </p> <p>I always try to calm her down and talk it out, redirect or remove her from the situation. Sometimes I have to ignore her and give her time to come down from the tantrum.</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/two-year-old-tantrums#post-1870093 Fri, 19 Sep 2014 11:16:08 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1870093@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son turned two on the 7th and for some reason this week he has become a nightmare about tantruming. He is so willful and chooses to throw a fit over little things that he never used to get so worked up about. If he can't have something now or doesn't get the exact food he wants he screams in this shrill awful way and hits. I've been telling him no bad ignoring. I guess I'm just wondering if there was a magic age when your child became more difficult, what you did to help resolve it and how long it lasted? I'm really getting a headache from all of the screaming. </p> <p>Thanks! </p>