https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 10 May 2026 03:52:46 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-270366 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 19:54:47 +0000 Trailmix 270366@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rachel ROFL!</p> <p>I'm sorry, that would really upset me too, absurd! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-270355 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 19:32:04 +0000 spaniellove 270355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dc yoga bee: The other variation on that - (looking at him) "Can I help you?" (looking at me) "Can I help you?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-270327 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 18:44:23 +0000 dc yoga bee 270327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh!! I feel your pain. I'm black, he's white and two diff last names. Last night we were standing in line together at IKEA, with rings, the lady looks at DH who is standing RIGHT next to me and goes- you're missing a box to this- it's two pieces. Mam, you're missing a box to this, it's two pieces. Um, you idiot we're together and I magically have one piece and he magically has the other "missing piece." I feel your pain. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-270314 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 18:28:50 +0000 StbHisMrs 270314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I use to get that a lot too, then I started introducing him as "This is my Husband ..." I haven't changed my last name yet, it's been almost 2 years. I should probably get on that...I don't have a good reason not to, other than not wanting to pay for all of my licenses to be changed as well (drivers, state insurance, state notary... blah blah blah). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-270251 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 17:21:13 +0000 MsLipGloss 270251@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What the What? &gt;.&lt; </p> <p>And why does it matter what your name is if you qualify for the loan? People who aren't married (and have different names) buy things together all.the.time (like cars and houses and such). *jinkies* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269795 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 12:38:40 +0000 sorrycharlie 269795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>wow, that's awful :/ sorry you had to deal with her. </p> <p>@Rachel: seriously!! O.o </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269779 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 12:33:36 +0000 Mrs. Pen 269779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>that's insane... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269776 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 12:32:29 +0000 spaniellove 269776@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rachel: Oh yeah...that is way too advanced for her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269698 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:37:20 +0000 Shutterbug 269698@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Jeez, imagine what she'd do with a married same sex couple - her head would explode! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269694 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:32:12 +0000 edelweiss 269694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>whoa, that is really close-minded of her. my husband and i are of different races and with different last names, but we've never gotten that kind of treatment. i'm sorry you've had to deal with this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269691 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:30:43 +0000 Andrea 269691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That is crazy. I'm Asian, DH is white, and I didn't change my name but I've never had anyone assume that we're not married ... at least not to my face. Sorry that happened! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269687 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:29:57 +0000 autumnlove 269687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Dang, super annoying! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269681 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:25:09 +0000 Adira 269681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, that's so annoying!!! It seems crazy to me that in this day and age people make assumptions like that! So sorry you have to deal with this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269669 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:18:52 +0000 DillonLion 269669@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What the heck?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/vent-why-assume-were-not-married#post-269668 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:17:57 +0000 spaniellove 269668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This seems to happen to us a lot. DH is Jewish and I am Asian, and we have different last names. Yesterday we closed on our refi (yeah!) and after about an hour, during which the lady could clearly see our hands with rings on the table, she asked, are you married? I knew he was thinking, not again! We're pretty sure we wouldn't get asked this if we were the same race. It isn't just the last names because people ask us this not knowing our names. They even assume we can't possibly know each other if we're standing right next to each other. </p> <p>(The insanity did not end there. She didn't understand the concept of not changing my name, and that I didn't have a separate maiden name. She insisted I had to write a statement about my maiden name...DH told me he wondered if she thought he was standing in for my real, Asian, husband.)</p> <p>Okay, just had to get that out! </p>