https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 17 May 2026 16:31:30 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459486 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 21:33:59 +0000 boiledpnut 459486@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We aren't accepting visitors for 24 hours after birth. I'm sure we'll be tired and we want a little bit of time to spend with our baby before people start coming. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459456 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 21:17:43 +0000 sorrycharlie 459456@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: they've caused so many other issues lately that he decided he's just not talking to them anymore until they mature more..I could go on for ages about how nuts it is! They wouldn't care if they knew, unfortunately - they always need drama so they'd move on to something else (which then became how horrible I am for not letting ILs hold her at the hospital. We were there 1 day and she was so overstimulated from visitors and drs that she screamed for hours, by the time they showed up she had just stopped so I told them i wasn't pushing my luck. Apparently mil cried all night and its all my fault! Umm..baby's happiness trumps your pictures, sorry!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459428 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 21:02:27 +0000 Smurfette 459428@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sorrycharlie: I am sorry! Did he not tell them it was his choice? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459422 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 21:00:12 +0000 mediagirl 459422@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents waited the waiting room. We called them when she was here and said we would invite them in when we were moved to the recovery room. I didn't want anyone in the delivery room. We were moved 1.5hrs after she was born. I know they were going crazy waiting!! :-) As soon as we were in that room, I called them and told them to come. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459415 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 20:57:21 +0000 sorrycharlie 459415@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Haha ohhh this is an ironic post. Everyone said to do what I wanted and that people would get over whatever I decided - well, I went into labor at 5 and delivered at 930, my parents had just walked into the hospital (my mom was gonna be in the room) as I delivered. So they came up after 40 min then went home. My husband didn't notify his family til the next morning (to avoid them showing up, and he chose not to for other reasons) and shiz hit the faaaaaaaan last week (yup..11 weeks later). Apparently I'm an awful selfish person among other insults and I treat his family terribly and favor mine (even though it was his decision, they think he should grow balls and stand up to me..interesting). Among a slew of other insults and rants. Good times.</p> <p>Regardless - do what you want, just be prepared for any fallouts lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459408 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 20:54:32 +0000 prettylizy 459408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents, DH's parents, my sister, her husband and DH's sister were all in the waiting room for quite a few hours waiting for me to deliver and then waited the almost hour it took for our skin to skin and nursing after she was born. I was excited to share her with everyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459397 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 20:47:25 +0000 MaisyMay 459397@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom, FIL, and MIL will be around while we are in labor, but once it's time to push or have a c-section, it's off to the waiting room for them. Our hosptial also has a golden hour policy that we fully intend to take advantage of. I figure that there's a restaurant next door to the hospital and those waiting can go get something to eat while we bond. Once we are ready, then they can come back and join us. They all seem pretty okay with that plan. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459376 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 20:31:43 +0000 Smurfette 459376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know my parents will want to be in the waiting room. We will call the Inlaws since they will have a 4 hour drive. I am assuming they will come up right away, they haven't said anything to us about it yet. DH and I agree only parents and siblings will know when we are in labor. I know my whole family, aunts, cousins will want to be there but I want to avoid that at all costs. I want some time with just the three of us especially if I am not in a recovery room yet.</p> <p> My biggest concern is my SIL posting something on FB. I told DH I want us to make the announcement when she gets here and announce her name, not his sister who can't keep her mouth shut. But that is really a whole another story..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459367 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 20:13:50 +0000 Boogs 459367@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a few relatives waiting around the whole time. We ended up having a complicated delivery that made it impossible for me to see the baby at all the day I had him. As I was waking up after surgery I remember people coming in to see me and say goodnight. DH showed them all a photo out of the baby, but out of respect to me he asked that everyone wait until the next day to come see LO after I finally was able to. He figured enough people got to hold him before I did and he wanted to at least limit it as much as he could. All of our family completely understood. So, just be honest with everyone about your wishes. Or make it DH's job to do so. ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459293 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 19:05:37 +0000 BelugaBean 459293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I gave birth at 7:48pm and I don't think anyone who hadn't been in the room came in until like 10 or 10:15. My recovery lasted a while and then I made it known that I wanted to do skin to skin and try to breastfeed. When they were done stitching me up, they had to give me a catheter to see if that was hindering any clotting and my mom was about to go get everybody! I told her no and that I'd tell her when I was ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459284 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 18:59:52 +0000 matador84 459284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was so worried about this but I went into labor at 11pm and delivered at 2a, so not only was timing bad but it happened so fast we didn't call anyone! It took over an hour to clean me and stitch up. I doubt they'll be barging in as soon as you deliver. Stay optimistic ! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459175 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:43:10 +0000 daniellemybelle 459175@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've given way more thought to this than someone who is not even pregnant should probably give! :) I, too, would like to have "the golden hour" just me &amp; DH, but I know that will really hurt my mom's feelings. I also think I might want support from her during labor. Still, I feel like if you let one parent in, it's not fair to keep the others out... so I don't know what we will do! Honestly, I am hoping DH's parents won't be waiting at the hospital, so we just have my mom to contend with. My stepdad and siblings will be understanding and willing to wait. But if DH's parents want to come earlier, I don't think we would be able to tell them no... it's their grandbaby! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459149 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:29:46 +0000 mrskc 459149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I made my family wait like 2.5 hours. I felt kinda bad but not bad enough to let them in. I did like 2 hours of skin to skin. My mom was already in the room for delivery. I did let my gma come in b/c I didn't care if she saw me BFing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459141 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:25:39 +0000 .twist. 459141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so worried about this. I know my mom will want to be there IMMEDIATELY. I can't even tell her after it's born because she would be so hurt. I am hoping our hospital has a 1 hour skin-to-skin policy! I might make it up! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459124 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:16:02 +0000 twinmama 459124@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Blue: I think we had about 45-ish minutes in the OR after birth while the babes got checked and I delivered placentas and had my tear stitched up. Other than their quick evals, we got to hold them the whole time.</p> <p>I know I'm in the minority, but when we got wheeled back to our room from the OR, all of our immediate family members were there (both sides), and it was one of the happiest moments of my life to have everyone there together with our long awaited babies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459110 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:02:24 +0000 ladyfingers 459110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our hospital has a one-hour skin-to-skin policy, so I have no compunction about asking our nurse to tell waiting room visitors that they can go in after an hour. Make them the bad guys! They don't mind :)</p> <p>My dad and stepmom already told me they want to know as soon as I go into labor, but I'm going to revise that plan and tell them once I'm admitted to the hospital. To be fair, they live about an hour away, so I understand they're anxious to see us and would rather be on our side of town than at home worrying and anxious. We'll have to extend the same policy to my FIL, who will be in town for 3 months when I'm due. I've already told DH, though, that I don't want anybody in the room until I have an epidural and/or feel like it, that they can't be there when I'm delivering, and that they can't come in for an hour afterwards. I don't feel bad about it at all -- I'm giving birth to our son, our first child, and I don't want to feel weird or awkward with people in the room at inconvenient times, or feel stressed out by their questions. DH agrees wholeheartedly, especially after our childbirth instructor told us that every distraction can delay labor by up to an hour, and shared stories of crazy family members asking all sorts of questions! He looked at me and said, "OK, my dad isn't allowed in the delivery room at all." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459109 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:01:53 +0000 kml636 459109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents were waiting, they came in about 45 mins after. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459103 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:00:11 +0000 blackbird 459103@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs. blue, a friend talked me into a doula this morning! It really made me realize that as much as I totally trust *my* OB, there's always a chance she can't deliver me! I mentioned one to DH and right away he said yep. My mother can also be a very intense person (since she worked in healthcare, she's all-knowing, lol) so I don't think it could be a bad thing!</p> <p>I know my MIL just wants to see the baby because when I mentioned the shower, she goes, "i don't want to see YOU, silly!" and I was like, "well, duh. But still. Blood. Down there. No thanks". Photos can suffice, I guess. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459098 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:56:24 +0000 jedeve 459098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've wondered about this since I think our parents will be in the waiting room. Mine are staying with us and DH's live an hour away. I don't want people in there while I'm still delivering the placenta or anything!!</p> <p>I'll probably have DH tell them a half or hour so after baby's born and then tell them they can come in in another half hour. But definitely no visitors until the baby has breast fed for the first time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459059 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:42:31 +0000 Mrs. Blue 459059@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I fully intend to utilize the nurses or our doula to help with this without hurting anyone's feelings. </p> <p>I had more written then this and then realized it probably won't matter for me because I have to deliver in the OR even if I have a regular birth and our babies will each have a NICU team there to evaluate them, so I think that pretty much solves the problem of right after the babies are born. Depending on how chaotic it is, I may ask the nurses to tell our parents they can come visit for X amount of time after we are back in the regular room and then there are some things they will need to do with "just the mom and dad and babies." Our hospital's childbirthing class leader, said the nurses are pros at handling grandparents, etc., if you just let them know what you want. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459057 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:42:00 +0000 blackbird 459057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining, I hope our hospital has that policy! it is a newer, more modern hospital, so perhaps it already does!</p> <p>@artbee, that's a great idea! I could see my MIL and my mother both making a crapload of phone calls! </p> <p>I can't not call my mother; if she finds out I had the baby and THEN has to drive 5 hours up, that is a wrath I am not willing to face. And good lord, if my MIL sees me and the baby before her? Nuh-uh, not going there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459042 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:37:04 +0000 luckypenny 459042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH insisted his MIL come in after an hour. I was still shaking pretty bad from epidural and teeth were chattering so hard that I was uncomfortable with anyone seeing me like that but I'm close to her and now 8 months later I dot care. But next time, I'm going to be showered at least! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459009 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:23:50 +0000 sotomorrow 459009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We called everyone when I was admitted to the hospital (shortly before midnight Saturday night) and said the baby would most likely be born in the morning on Sunday. We asked everyone to make plans to come visit us on Monday. Everyone was very understanding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-459008 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:23:41 +0000 Mommy Finger 459008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents were in the waiting room all night waiting for DS to be born. I felt bad since my labor took forever! I think we waited an hour before they came in. Obviously I wanted to be cleaned up before they came in. However, it's different when it's your parents vs your in laws. Do what makes you feel comfortable! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458863 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 15:11:51 +0000 Mrsbells 458863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree just dont tell them you are in labor, because you never know how long it might be. call them after the baby arrives. thats what we did </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458858 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 15:10:42 +0000 heffalump 458858@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We told both of our parents a couple of months before I gave birth that they weren't going to be allowed in the room at least an hour after my LO was born so I could do skin to skin and we could bond as a family of 3. They were all very understanding about it and of course still chose to come to the hospital as soon as they found out I was in labor to be in the waiting room for the whole thing. DH sent them a picture of her right when she was born so I think they spent that hour sharing that picture with friends and family and calling everyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458849 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 15:06:02 +0000 yoursilverlining 458849@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our hospital didn't allow any visitors in to see you for 1 hour, starting when you got into your recovery room. If you want longer time alone, I bet you could ask a nurse or doctor to tell your MIL she has to wait per "hospital policy" so you don't have to be the bad guys! ;-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458776 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 14:43:18 +0000 blackbird 458776@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, my parents have to drive 5 hours up here. So even if I call when I'm in labor, there's always a chance they'll still miss it, if it goes quickly! But my MIL lives &lt; 30 min away. DH says he doesn't mind making everyone wait, but doesn't have an issue popping out to say that everything is OK. And our hospital has 24/7 visiting hours for maternity patients, so that's not gonna save me, either :P @tororojo, there's a good chance our hospital has this policy, too, and I just haven't been told that yet!</p> <p>I guess by the time they get you to a recovery room, though, it could be awhile?...I don't know how my SIL's hospital operated compared to mine. I'll be finding out in a couple weeks though, during the tour! But I definitely got the impression she got to see SIL *right* away </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458770 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 14:41:50 +0000 tororojo 458770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our hospital encourages parents + baby only for the first hour after birth (2 hrs for a c-section), then after that you get transferred to a recovery room where we'll have visitors. Apparently the first hour after birth is the most aware time for a baby, so he/she should be bonding with you, not grandma. (I would prefer even longer but don't want to cause family drama) Maybe you can blame it on hospital/doctor recommendation and say no visitors until ___ hrs after birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/visitors-how-soon-after-birth#post-458757 Thu, 20 Dec 2012 14:37:36 +0000 Adira 458757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just don't call them until after the baby is born!</p> <p>I'm worried that Hubs family would want to barge in on my too, so I think I'll just wait until we're done and then call them and say "We're at the hospital and the baby is here!" </p>