https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 01:53:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-369037 Wed, 31 Oct 2012 07:28:19 +0000 heffalump 369037@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO is 15 months and still not walking. The doctor even seems worried, but for some reason I'm really not. I feel like she can walk, she's just scared. I think mother's intuition plays a part in it, and I just have that feeling that there's nothing to worry about and she'll walk when she's ready. Of course I worry a little bit..... but not enough to lose sleep over. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368922 Wed, 31 Oct 2012 01:51:12 +0000 Ree723 368922@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, I hear you on worrying about LO hitting milestones; it's so hard not to compare to other babies! Our 4 month old is nowhere near pushing herself up on tummy time but it seems like all I see are pictures of babies much younger than her pushing themselves up with their arms and staying there for a while. I also know other babies her age are sitting unassisted briefly or doing the tripod sitting, but again, we're nowhere near that. DD is doing really well with the communication milestones though and has been hitting all of them quite early.</p> <p>I just remind myself that all babies eventually learn to sit up, roll, walk, etc, so if she doesn't do it now, it's not a big deal. I also like to believe the old adage that says babies are either walkers or talkers. </p> <p>It's so hard not to worry and/or compare though. I really like what a PP (I think it was Cocobee) said about just enjoying them whilst they're still little and immobile as this only lasts for such a short time! Way to put it in perspective! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368875 Wed, 31 Oct 2012 00:24:09 +0000 HLK208 368875@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With DS, I was a huge worrier. DD, I know it will happen, if it doesn't--I'll find out later but there is no reason to worry today since my baby is happy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368869 Wed, 31 Oct 2012 00:15:20 +0000 banana 368869@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son has a speech delay which we're dealing with right now. So we're constantly evaluating his milestones, as well as my 3 month old daughter's milestones. I used to not really care or monitor them much, but looking back I wish I did. Maybe i could have caught my son's speech delay sooner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368780 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 22:54:38 +0000 brownie 368780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastemoo: I wish people would stop judging on size. My LO is teeny tiny (just fits on 9-12 month clothes at 18 months) and physically advanced. So everyone says how advanced he is. But he doesn't speak well at this point. He understands what we say but won't actually use his voice to make words. I see him behind but everyone else just sees little and his physical abilities. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368675 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 21:47:09 +0000 sarac 368675@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, I think a lot of these feelings are driving by the fact that no one goes on and on about their baby being late at anything. My baby, for example, is a SUPER early talker. I'm always talking about it to family and facebook because it's so cute and fun and I just love it and feel so lucky to have her. </p> <p>But walking? At 13 months, she's not even interested. She barely crawled until 12 months, so I expect her to be on the late end of normal for walking. But I don't go on about that, so you'd just think I had this really brag worthy baby. When instead, she's just fast in some things, slow in others, just like most. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368613 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 21:13:05 +0000 T-Mom 368613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with some of the other ladies that there are plenty of babies hitting their milestones "late" that you don't hear about. A friend of mine's babies didn't get any teeth until they were after 1yr (all 3 kids who are few years apart), which seemed worrisome to me but they were fine and gummed their food until then. I also tend to compare my 2 kids.. One is more physical and the other more cerebral. Not to mention boy vs girl. All babies develop at their own pace! Your LO will be fine I'm sure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368544 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 20:29:01 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 368544@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastemoo: hopefully not! We make a conscious effort to never compare out loud. Each little one is a unique individual... Now what goes on deep inside your head... Well, we can't help that, right?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368528 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 20:11:17 +0000 Sammyfab 368528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastemoo: I'm an OT as well (like mrs. m57) but I primarily work with school-age children. Because of my clinical background, I can figure out all of the little steps that are comprised to make up an overall task. So when I practise physical skills with my LO we do something called backward chaining where I'll help him do steps 1-4 and he does step 5 on his own. Once he's mastered that then he does steps 4 and 5, and so on... Feel free to PM me as well :).</p> <p>I am actually taking my LO for an OT consult (since I don't specialize in infants) in a couple of weeks but I'm not sure if she is going to tell me much that I may not already know. I'm hoping I do learn some new things though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368458 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:32:51 +0000 Mrs.M57 368458@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastemoo: Lily is a big bubba too, and I feel like people think the same, that she should be doing more because she looks so much older!<br /> And just following up off of @cvbee I'm not sure about every state, but I know in PA there are free services regardless of income level that come to your home for children 0-3. In PA it is called Early Intervention. But, I would start with your pediatrician if you have any concerns. I work in PA's system for 0-3 as an occupational therapist, and honestly even if you just want peace of mind and some tips, an evaluation doesn't hurt! Honestly though I think us mommies put so much pressure on ourselves to teach our little ones, but babies are so different! They do things in their own good time, and make us worry, but most of the time it's ok! I have had many kids that I've seen that I started services with, and before I even got to work with them they hit the milestone that I was there to work on! Babies have so much they are working on within their first year of life, it's really amazing to think about, I wouldn't want anyone to rush me on learning so much in such a small amount of time! If you have any Other questions or just want to talk feel free to PM me :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368446 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:22:44 +0000 cvbee 368446@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe to make you worry less, I can try to remember some of the things they were looking for at our 6 month appointment:<br /> -reaching and grabbing objects<br /> -sitting with support (not on own!)<br /> -higher push-up at tummy time</p> <p>I can't remember them all, but when I saw the list, I was like 'wow, I really thought that we were expected to do more by now....phew'.</p> <p>Hopefully going to your 6 month appointment will make you feel better. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368422 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:10:56 +0000 cvbee 368422@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastemoo: bah! I forgot our differences in system...Here in Ontario, Canada there is a place where we can take our babies/young children to be seen for free. Wish you had a place like this too: <a href="http://www.onekidsplace.ca/english/home.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.onekidsplace.ca/english/home.html</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368417 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:07:34 +0000 pastemoo 368417@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs.M57: :) Thanks!<br /> @LAGS: Oh anecdotes! LOVE that. My mom couldn't tell me a thing about my brother--she didn't remember.<br /> @cvbee: Huh. I don't think my insurance would allow that--I'm having a hard enough time getting him to the audiologist that he is supposed to go see. If I ask for something else I doubt I'd get it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368413 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:03:20 +0000 cvbee 368413@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think about how convenient the non-milestone is for me. (For example, knowing that LO will be exactly where I put him when I come back, or letting him nap on a bed when we're out visiting since he can't roll over!) </p> <p> But if you are honestly a little concerned you could see a special baby OT who could teach you some ways to help him along. A couple of my real-life friends have done this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368411 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 19:02:45 +0000 LAGS 368411@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think everyone goes through worry like this in their own way. Earlier I was googling various infant activities to do with LO because I found myself all paranoid that I'm not doing enough for her developmentally.</p> <p>Also, touching on what Mrs. Jacks said, my SIL (DH's older sister) apparently was SUPER early with all her milestones and when DH came along he was the total opposite - he was late with everything socially and physically. They semi-worried there was something wrong with him lol... now he's grown and is my smart, strong hubby. All babies are different! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368380 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:42:48 +0000 Mrs.M57 368380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is a huge issue for me too! With my job, I know when babies "should start to do things" and I tend to get anxious about them. I find that hubs keeps me in check. We talked about it while I was pregnant and he promised to help me. So at 6 weeks when DD hadn't smiled yet and I was freaking out, he calmed me down and sure enough she smiled by 7 weeks :-) this is a toughie, im right there with you though **hugs***</p> <p>@mrsjacks: I'm sure that is really hard having two kids to compare! Kids do things so differently it's amazing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368376 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:41:38 +0000 pastemoo 368376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: So I'm going to be worse with the next one? :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368375 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:40:58 +0000 pastemoo 368375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: I think maybe it's just that he is big and people keep looking at me like my 9 month old is really far behind but he's 5 months old.<br /> I get daily comments on what he can't do because he's big. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368368 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:35:51 +0000 Mrs. Pen 368368@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am a worrier by nature... but somehow I skipped this!! I just don't worry about his milestones. Maybe because I want him to be my baby forever! ;)</p> <p>I never pushed for him to roll, sit, crawl etc. I don't care when he walks or talks. Sure it will be exciting when it does happen - but eventually IT HAPPENS. So why not just enjoy this fleeting time that he is a wee little baby instead of always waiting for the next thing... basically forcing him to grow up.</p> <p>I'd hate to look back on this time and think I wasted it by worrying only about what he can/can't do especially in comparison to other babies. I already have peace of mind about the first six months because I always followed my instinct. I have never done anything "by the book"... but instead I did it "by my baby", according to his needs. And I'm happy I did and do :) he seems to be as well! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368357 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:28:13 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 368357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's especially hard when your two kids are so different with respect to milestones... I'm just trying to appreciate the things that M does. And she's doing things in a different order (no better or worse, just different). </p> <p>I guess as long as she's happy and not frustrated and not so far behind that she needs speech therapy, then I'm ok. Not helpful, I know! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368333 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 18:04:16 +0000 pastemoo 368333@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lemondrop: I like this advice.<br /> @mrsaudi: My baby is big, too. :)<br /> @stargal: a mind of his own. :P &lt;3<br /> @regberadaisy: :P I know I never learned to crawl and just walked. It happens. It's part of "us" and partly about a million facebook friends have been posting things that I just can't keep up with.<br /> @Rainbow Sprinkles: :P I guess. You bet I'll still brag when it all happens.<br /> @brownie: LOL. I know. It's funny. I grew up with so much pressure to perform and I do NOT want to pass that on and yet I feel like people judge me by what my son does. Also he looks older than he is because he is big so I feel like a lot of people are disappointed in what he can and can't do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368324 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:55:47 +0000 regberadaisy 368324@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@brownie: haha I love your perspective!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368320 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:54:29 +0000 brownie 368320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know this isn't as comforting. But as soon as they hit a milestone, they lose the benefits of the old thing. So as soon as they are crawling, they are no longer staying where you put them. Once they start talking, they never shut up and start talking back. </p> <p>Also, sometimes they can do things but they choose not to show you. This is okay. My kid always did things at daycare before I ever saw it. And he says way more words to daddy than he ever says to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368298 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:39:20 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 368298@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>daisy has a good point....you only really hear about other babies' milestones when they're hitting them early, not when they are late. So it kind of skews perceptions, making it seem like every baby hits them early (since moms don't "brag" about their late sitter/crawler/talker).</p> <p>Hugs, girl. Xoxo </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368290 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:36:07 +0000 regberadaisy 368290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aww not "us" I hope?!</p> <p>I do worry too but not too much. Usually it's just a twinge then I go eh. Like you said all babies are so different. And it just makes it seem worse bc you only hear about it when they're hitting it early but not when it's on time nor later on.</p> <p>M still does not roll regularly even tho I know she can. I've just decided she's going to be cool and skip crawling and go straight to walking! :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368286 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:31:31 +0000 stargal 368286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pastempoo: wow, i feel like i could of wrote this post! even when i see milestones post of hellobee, icant help but compare and then i feel bad like im judging my little one. what i do is read what he should be doing nd try to help him and then stop reading. so i know where he should be at in geranl terms but dont stress about it.... (ha im trying to get better with it!) BUT he's his own person, if he is intrersted in doing it, he will. llike rolling he's done it twice, he just doesnt care about doing it at all, but the boy will make me stnad him up a 10000 times a day. and i think ok so ive never heard of a baby not walking (insert other activity) bc they didnt roll, etc.....babies have amind of thier own and are so unique it really even baffles me that we have milestones for them to reach at a certain age when babies are so different.(and how we stress about them!, and trust me it weighs on my mind alot!) . </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368207 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 16:11:12 +0000 Springtime 368207@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I worry too, a lot. I know my LO is behind in some milestones and I hate hearing about younger babies that can do things my LO can't. I always tell myself that each baby is different and will achieve these milestones when they are ready. My LO is on the heavier side 95 percentile so that makes it a little harder for him to roll over and move around. He is advanced in other areas though so I think he makes up for where he lacks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368206 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 16:09:28 +0000 lemondrop 368206@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I stopped reading the books. I got too hung up on the "whens" so I just started working on him with whatever skill he seemed ready for next. </p> <p>For example, he had mastered the Army crawl, then started to pull himself up to stand before attempting the real crawl. So I worked with him on lining up toys of baby puffs to crawl after. He did the real crawl when he was ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368203 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 16:01:12 +0000 pastemoo 368203@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mandb36: That is adorable!<br /> So how do you recognize what are the smaller steps? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/ways-to-not-worry-about-milestones#post-368202 Tue, 30 Oct 2012 15:59:55 +0000 BelugaBean 368202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I worry too but I agree that I focus on the smaller steps that lead to a bigger goal. I also try to focus on what she can do and try to think back to how far she's come since a month or two ago.</p> <p>Another thing that always helps is her face when she reaches a new milestone and accomplishes something new. She always has the biggest smile and looks so proud of herself. </p>