https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 07:06:24 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924687 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 21:58:15 +0000 LemonJack 2924687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: She lives in the country and does have a very big yard so once the ceremony is over there will be a ton of space for the kids to run. I worry people will be packed in during the ceremony, but my youngest is NOT going to sit still so I will stand in the back far away from everyone with him. My girls are in the ceremony, so I’m not sure if they’ll be standing up front with MIL or sitting in the front row. Either way, if they’re in the front I know the family they’re sitting next to IS vaccinated.</p> <p>As far as what happens if we go back early, I’m not sure. If it’s super early I would consider just driving home and eating the cost of the hotel. I think we’ll take two cars that weekend so if I leave early my DH can still stay. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924686 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 21:40:48 +0000 LemonJack 2924686@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: DH and I will attend because we’re both vaccinated and can mask up as an extra layer of protection. I feel safe for me personally, with those precautions outside. :) I’m worried about the kids because they aren’t vaccinated, and although my older two are great at mask wearing, my youngest isn’t old enough to wear one yet. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924685 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 21:37:48 +0000 LemonJack 2924685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you everyone for the kind, thoughtful remarks. It’s helpful for me to hear from others who understand why I’m nervous despite the fact that it will be outside. I know we will really disappoint my MIL if we don’t stay long, but I am leaning toward that route. I think we’ll have to have a discussion with her soon asking about what mitigation they plan on, if they know how many aren’t vaccinated, etc.</p> <p>Edited to add that we’ll just have to keep an eye on it as things seem to be changing so quickly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924683 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 19:23:54 +0000 agold 2924683@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are really worried about the kids, you should all stay home. If you think your kids will be exposed to germs, you will be exposed to them all the same and bring whatever it is back to your kids. Safest to stay home. Also, having to be militant about kids keeping masks on and staying outside (what about the bathroom???) sounds like a drag for everyone. Just stay home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924682 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 11:47:34 +0000 JJ2626 2924682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I’d have the kids wear masks for the ceremony. I think the party really depends on how big the yard is. If the kids will be off playing and can stay away, I’d maybe let them go with their masks on but be prepared to leave if necessary. Also depends on what rates are like where you live. If I was somewhere like Louisiana no way would I go. Here in rural Massachusetts, I’d consider it. But I’ll also say, do what you feel safe with and don’t feel pressured into something. It is so hard to make decisions right now and give yourself grace to potentially offend your MIL. The pandemic is not over and people can’t expect life to be normal! Good luck. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924681 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 10:25:51 +0000 Bluemasonjar 2924681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Being outside for the ceremony would not concern me. I would probably have the kids wear masks knowing there are unvaccinated people in attendance. If the food is being served inside and there is no option to eat outdoors then I would leave after the ceremony and pictures. I think it is a good compromise, you will be there to celebrate but are balancing it with your family's safety. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924680 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 09:51:32 +0000 ElbieKay 2924680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go, have the kids wear masks, and be super militant about having them stay outside. If it's not working, you can leave a little early. Be clear on the plan and expectations with your husband so that you can function as a team if things get off course.</p> <p>And if you know that someone is unvaxxed, make sure they stay away from your kid. It's fine to be a mama bear about that. Don't worry about offending them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924679 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 09:29:10 +0000 Mama Bird 2924679@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd go, unless cases are out of control. Outside is really safe. I've seen so many kids at museums and aquariums and on the beach this summer. And obviously their parents can't control who's next to them on the beach. An outdoor wedding doesn't seem that different. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924678 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 09:28:19 +0000 greencraftycello 2924678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My sister postponed her 2020 wedding to the beginning of July, when the COVID numbers were thankfully very low. We knew 95 percent of the guests were vaccinated, and because of this and the low numbers at the time, we decided to attend as planned. We did have the kids tested before seeing my immunocompromised FIL.</p> <p>If her wedding were taking place now, with the numbers how they are and possible breakthrough cases, I would probably have had them attend only the ceremony and do pictures. Do you have other family you trust that could watch them during the reception at the hotel? And if things are just too unsafe, especially if there are a lot of unvaccinated people there, it’s ok to say no! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924677 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 08:44:41 +0000 erinbaderin 2924677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you take them back to the hotel what will happen then? Will you all skip the reception and stay at the hotel? How far away is this from your house? I'm just wondering if it's actually worth it. I agree with you that this would make me super nervous - that's a lot of people, does she have a yard big enough to hold 80 socially distanced people? </p> <p>I get that she will be upset if you don't attend. That being said - it's a pandemic, your kids are unvaccinated, and that's a lot of people. I might be inclined to just send your husband, stay home completely, and facetime the ceremony. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924676 Tue, 17 Aug 2021 08:24:40 +0000 bhbee 2924676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like the idea of the ceremony only - you could mask with filters (not sure if all kids are old enough) as long as it’s not sweltering (that was our best option for school here before we finally got our mask mandate back) and people probably will be spaced a bit or you could even stand to the side. And then leave when food starts. Maybe even ask if she wants to do a couple pictures beforehand with your kids before it’s so crowded? I think finding a middle ground would be ideal but from my own experience, sometimes that doesn’t work and you have to just bail and deal with the consequences. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924673 Mon, 16 Aug 2021 22:53:46 +0000 karenbme 2924673@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this! We have skipped a wedding and a first birthday party that were both controversial in the family, and it’s definitely not fun, but they were also both indoor events where we felt like people didn’t understand or take seriously transmission risks.</p> <p>I feel like there are so many unknowns, too. Are people being asked to mask or take any other precautions (like antigen testing)? What do case rates look like in your area?</p> <p>If you talk to your MIL about the event and feel like you can keep the kids masked and distanced especially from unvaccinated family or people whose status you don’t know and case rates are relatively low in your area it might be a tolerable risk. A tool you could use is the microCovid project, which has been circulating my office as leadership prepares us all for a potential mandatory company wide gathering in October. You can create a scenario and it will give you a risk (in microCovid) based on your area and the activity. The color scale is designed for things you’re doing repeatedly so not the best for one offs, but 10,000 microCovids is equivalent to a 1% chance of contracting Covid doing the activity so it lets you quantify and compare. It’s also helpful to compare to things you are doing, like work or daycare if directly quantifying risk seems arbitrary. </p> <p>Good luck! And no there isn’t a right or wrong decision just the decision you make for your family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wedding-and-kids#post-2924671 Mon, 16 Aug 2021 20:40:32 +0000 LemonJack 2924671@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL is getting married in September at her house. It’s an outdoor wedding, but I’m still worried about it because 80 people are invited, I know at least some are unvaccinated, and our three kids (all too young to be vaccinated) will be there. The food is going to be spread out inside.</p> <p>I’m super nervous about this. How do we make this even remotely okay for our kids? Clearly they will not step foot inside, but I’m still worried it’s not possible to social distance with that many people.</p> <p>Do we just bring them for the ceremony and then take them back to our hotel? Thoughts?!</p> <p>I know MIL is going to be heartbroken, but this just doesn’t seem safe. </p>