https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 11 Jun 2026 21:33:38 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158996 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 13:05:25 +0000 Ms.Badger 1158996@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like you are pumping? Let your SO give her the bottle. I think it helps if your boob are off the table, then if it's just a comfort thing she might get the hint and not wake for just a bottle. GL.<br /> ETA. Also try bicycling her legs a couple times throughout the day. Could maybe relieve some of the gas. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158926 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 12:41:26 +0000 photojane 1158926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no advice, I just wanted to say that every phase is just that - a phase! It seems so daunting now, but it will pass. In a few months you'll be on the other side of it! You can do it!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158876 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 12:28:26 +0000 lovehoneybee 1158876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scotchbonnet: I think the ones we used were Carter's brand? </p> <p>His sleep didn't start stretching out until probably 3 months or so. I'll be perfectly honest, though, I'm pretty sure the only reason he slept at all was that we co-bedded. The sleep sacks helped, but being close to me/being able to nurse on demand all night was probably more beneficial. For both of us, since I barely stirred when he latched on (which was often). Sleep has been a constant struggle for us--even at 14 months he still usually wakes up at least once a night. </p> <p>I can definitely empathize, but you're absolutely not doing anything wrong. Some babies just aren't great sleepers! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158842 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 12:20:19 +0000 Alivoo01 1158842@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If your LO is gassy, maybe give gas drops? I did this for DS and it helped a lot as it gave immediate relief. My pedi said gas drops don't do much for BF babies, but I beg to differ! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158801 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 12:10:21 +0000 .twist. 1158801@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dude slept like that up until almost exactly 13 weeks. It was terrible. Sleep still isn't great but it's a lot better. </p> <p>I agree about ditching the swaddle, just remember it takes a few days for them to get used to something new, so don't give up on the first night if not swaddling doesn't go so well. </p> <p>I also will dip his paci in gripe water when he's drowsy and it usually helps him fall asleep.</p> <p>I also want to say that I was told the same thing about formula and it truly didn't make a difference. Now he's 14 weeks ebf and he will occasionally sleep 6 hour stretches but his usual stretch is 3.5 hours. </p> <p>You'll be ok, just push through! **hugs** </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158748 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 11:56:40 +0000 Foodnerd81 1158748@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scotchbonnet: we got infant gas drops for C that seem to help. I give them to her between sides while nursing before bed. If it's gas that could definitely help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158733 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 11:54:11 +0000 scotchbonnet 1158733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for your replies. I do feel a bit encouraged to hear that others have been through it. I got a couple more different pacifiers to today to try so we will see. Also I will look into the sleep sack with the sleeves, and when that arrives, I think I will just transition her to the crib from the moses basket.<br /> I really don't want to formula feed so I will top her up with breast milk in a bottle for her feed before she goes down tonight. I know that gas pains wake her up a lot of the time too, so I am trying everything I can to rectify that as well.</p> <p>Something has got to work... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158126 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 08:19:51 +0000 lamariniere 1158126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds normal to me. My DS was like that until at least 6 months! Like others have said, try a pacifier or change sleeping areas. Also, can you send in your SO to try to comfort her without feeding? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158108 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 08:16:19 +0000 edelweiss 1158108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>you're not doing anything wrong. that is a brutal schedule, you must be at your wit's end. i don't know whether this will make you feel better or not, but i don't think formula vs. breastmilk will make a difference. if you want to try, you could do a 50/50 bottle of formula + bm to see if that helps.</p> <p>like others have suggested, you could try a pacifier, rock n play, swing, etc. to see if that will help her sleep longer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1158008 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 07:37:13 +0000 Revel 1158008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs to you! You're not doing anything wrong. It took my LO a while to get longer stretches of sleep, and at 19 weeks she still has not ever had a night without a wakeup, although now she usually gives us a 6 hour stretch to start the night. She certainly wasn't doing that at 9 weeks. I think your LOs sleep is totally normal. And honestly, once I surrendered to the fact that LO just wasn't going to STTN for the foreseeable future, I felt much better.</p> <p>Stick to your plan to EBF if you want to and don't give in to the formula suggestion. There's no guarantee that will work anyway.</p> <p>Also regarding the night feedings, I've pretty much always just fed LO when she wakes, even now approaching five months. She sometimes is hungry and sometimes not, but it is the fastest and easiest way to get her back to sleep. I know that may be controversial for some who sleep train, but IMO, especially with a 9 week old, I wouldn't want to not feed her if she seems hungry.</p> <p>Hang in there. I think we started to get longer stretches around 10 or 12 weeks. I remember a really rough sleep period from 7 to 10 weeks, so you could be right around the corner from some better sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1157862 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 04:35:52 +0000 Penny Lane 1157862@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scotchbonnet: for white noise we use an old iPod plugged in to an iPod dock. the app we use is relax melodies, the free version has tonnes of different sounds! we use rain ones, because I wanted to get him used to rain noises (to say it rains a lot here would be an understatement!)</p> <p>I definitely second (third, fourth, fifth?) trying without a swaddle. we also gave up swaddling very early. i see you tried that tonight without much success, but it could take a few nights to really work.</p> <p>does your LO cluster feed at night before bed? at that age my LO would eat every 30 - 90 minutes from 5pm - midnight (fun times...), but then he would sleep a solid 4 or 5 hours. maybe if you encourage feeding more often in the evening it will help fill up her tank, so to speak?</p> <p>another thing you could try that I haven't seen mentioned is putting the moses basket on a slight incline, so her head (and maybe upper body) is elevated. I think Mrs. Blue did a blog post on how she slept her twins, and that was one of the ways!</p> <p>ETA: just wanted to add that you're not doing anything wrong! formula isn't necessarily going to make your baby any better at sleeping! on the other hand, if that's something you want to try, there's nothing wrong with formula! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1157855 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 03:54:27 +0000 scotchbonnet 1157855@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lovehoneybee: oh man, that sounds exactly like my lo! What brand sleep sack did you use??? I will try anything at this point. Last night, I tried really tanking her up on milk before bed as suggested and I ditched the swaddle. She woke up 45 mins after I put her down :(<br /> How old was lo when you started using the sleep sack? How long did your lo start sleeping for after that? Sorry for the million questions; I am a desparate woman :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1157854 Fri, 18 Oct 2013 03:48:13 +0000 scotchbonnet 1157854@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ellie: That's something else to try. She loooves the sound of the kettle when it is starting to boil. I tried to find sounds similar to that on youtube but she wasn't too keen on those. There are so many to choose from. Which one would you recommend? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1157629 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 22:03:27 +0000 lovehoneybee 1157629@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Big hugs. Those early days are so draining! </p> <p>My LO was the same. At the beginning he wouldn't sleep anywhere but in my arms, and the only way I got any sleep at all was by co-bedding. And he wouldn't take a paci until he was 6 months old. And he refused to be swaddled. He wouldn't just struggle and then calm down, he would full on panic and Houdini out of every swaddle we tried. </p> <p>On that last point, putting him into a sleep-sack (we used long-sleeved fleece) instead of a swaddle did wonders for us. He was just much more comfortable sleeping with his arms up over his head! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1157591 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 21:30:35 +0000 Ellie 1157591@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you have a white noise machine or a humidifier or something on to make a white noise? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154515 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 09:02:35 +0000 scotchbonnet 1154515@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@alivoo01 ah I can't wait for 4 hour sleep stretches. It must be like heaven indeed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154360 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 08:22:53 +0000 Alivoo01 1154360@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just wanted to commiserate with you on the sleep and the formula advice given. DS is 13 weeks now, but I remember those 2 hour nights. Heck, he was waking up every hour on the hour for a couple days just last week! </p> <p>I agree with ditching the swaddle if she hates it. Is she eating quite a bit during the day? My pedi said to make sure they eat more during the day so they can sleep more/better at night. Otherwise, you'll be feeding all night because they're hungry. DS is also a lazy eater and always falls asleep at the boob after just a few minutes of nursing. He stays awake if I give him a bottle of expressed milk, and will finish it so I've been him a bottle of expressed milk right before bed so I know he's full (like @chopsuey said).</p> <p>It gets better! DS is now sleeping 4 hour stretch at night and it's heaven!! haha </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154355 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 08:21:59 +0000 Foodnerd81 1154355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scotchbonnet: My LO usually won't take a paci either, except that sometimes she does and is soothed by it. Makes no sense. So, don't give up totally. In my case, it won't help her sleep really, but it helps sooth her in the car so that's something. Like you, I bought pretty much every brand on the market, thinking the next one would be the ONE that works. Same with swaddles, come to think of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154317 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 08:09:09 +0000 scotchbonnet 1154317@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira, she wont take a paci for nothing. She is such a diva. I have tried many different kinds too. The next thing to try tonight is a bottle of expressed milk. I only have a stash of 8 ounces as my supply is not great ( I eat oatmeal everyday and will be adding fenugreek capsules next).<br /> @Ms. Badger she sleeps in a moses basket next to me and i have a blanket rolled up to make it more cozy.<br /> @chopsuey i will ditch the swaddle and see if it helps and give her an extra bottle of expressed milk. If those dont work i will really be completely out of ideas.<br /> thanks for the suggestions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154224 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:56:25 +0000 Smurfette 1154224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ditch the swaddle if she doesn't like it!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154222 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:53:54 +0000 Ms.Badger 1154222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Where is she sleeping? Have you tried something more enclosed? My LO slept in the rock n play for 12 weeks, no swaddle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154212 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:34:28 +0000 Foodnerd81 1154212@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any great advice bc we battle out own sleep issues but I just wanted to say I totally understand- the nights when I just don't get any good sleep the smallest thing just makes me burst into tears. I hope you figure something out- its impossible to get through te day like that. </p> <p>Have you tried just unswaddling her , or swaddling around her chest with arms out? I know my Lo would flail her arms too much anyway but it seems to work for other people. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154211 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:33:41 +0000 Adira 1154211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I concur with @chopsuey: on the swaddle front. Xander never liked being swaddled so we stopped in the first couple weeks. It took him a little bit to get used to his hands smacking himself around, but once he was used to it, he slept a LOT better without the swaddle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154210 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:29:57 +0000 chopsuey 1154210@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you pump? In the early months I used to give DS a pumped bottle of milk right before bedtime so I knew his belly was full.<br /> Both of my kids hated being swaddled so I ditched the swaddle early on too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154207 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:25:53 +0000 Adira 1154207@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Will your LO take a pacifier? How I got Xander to drop some of his MOTN feeds was when he would wake up, I would immediately pop the pacifier in his mouth! Sometimes he'd just spit it out and I'd pop it back in a few times, but eventually it would stick and he'd fall back to sleep. Unless he was actually hungry - then he'd keep refusing the pacifier! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-am-i-doing-wrong-2#post-1154196 Thu, 17 Oct 2013 06:13:30 +0000 scotchbonnet 1154196@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi all, I could really do with some advice as I feel like I have hit a wall. LO will be 9 weeks on Saturday, and she is still sleeping max 2 hours day or night. Daytime, I am obviously ok with 2 hour max naps but night time is becoming unsustainable. </p> <p>She is EBF and I am trying to keep it that way. It is so discouraging when people keep advising me to just give her formula at night. I don't know if she is waking up out of habit because for her first night feed, she only feeds for a few minutes before falling asleep. Nothing I do to try and keep her awake for that feed works. She simply goes right back to sleep. She wakes up and acts like she is VERY hungry for that feed so I get confused.</p> <p>I try to tank her up on BM before she goes down for the night. I feed her, then we do the bathtime routine so that she is wide awake, then I feed her again before she goes to sleep. But she keeps waking up every 1.5 to 2 hours.</p> <p>Last night she woke up every hour. I am so exhausted that I actually burst into tears at one point when she woke up after 45 mins. I can't keep this up. </p> <p>I swaddle her (we are on swaddle number 4) but she hates it so much that the moment she starts to wake even a little bit she starts to fight the swaddle and then wakes herself up fully crying. I still swaddle her anyway but just one hand.<br /> What am I doing wrong?<br /> Should I just give her formula??? I am so tired. </p>