https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 07 Apr 2026 00:10:29 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-512546 Fri, 18 Jan 2013 09:00:38 +0000 kml636 512546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Some days it was really really bad... When I finally started moving on with life it got better. I love to travel and DH said we could plan a trip anywhere to help take my mind off things. I booked a trip to Italy, Greece, and Turkey in June and like the next week, of course, I got pregnant with my LO that I had 8 weeks ago! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-512255 Thu, 17 Jan 2013 23:55:50 +0000 singingbee 512255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I cried, talked to my BFF, talked to my mom, talked to DH. We lost our daughter at 20 weeks. I've tried to channel my energy into other things. I couldn't finish our nursery, but I could work on my classroom--which I moved to a new job this school year. I am focusing on working out again and trying to alleviate stress that way. </p> <p>I also find comfort in the fact that we did get pregnant and my body could carry our daughter for so long. The fact that we lost her means that something was wrong from the beginning, that this pregnancy was not meant to go full term. After I delivered, my doctor noted that the umbilical cord was abnormal. I know it wasn't anything I did, but it was something that plagued me for a while. I wondered if there was anything I could have done. I've turned to my faith more. I've prayed and prayed and sometimes just sat in silence. </p> <p>It's been a difficult thing to deal with and trying to keep on in life, but I know that this made our relationship stronger and I know we will have our sticky baby soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-512236 Thu, 17 Jan 2013 23:43:13 +0000 Mrs. Schoolbus 512236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had two losses in 2011 (one in march at 12 weeks and one in dec at 9 weeks.) The thing that brought me the most comfort was just crying. People would say things that were well-intentioned but would come off wrong or I wasn't prepared to hear it because I was still sad. Talking to others who went through a miscarriage helped-- because they just listened and didn't try to give me advice or say stuff like "you'll get pregnant." because at the time, I had no idea if I could ever keep a pregnancy. It definitely brought DH and I a lot closer-- he even shed some tears-- (he's super manly so good thing he's not on here reading that I just told y'all he cried~~!) lol! I also went through acupuncture and my acupuncturist was so comforting-- she just listened, didn't place blame, and said "we're in this together." That was also comforting. :) I'm currently almost 22 weeks. Take heart @sugar.biscuit! We all have our journey and story-- we just don't know how it will turn out yet but there is always hope. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-508110 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 14:18:34 +0000 heffalump 508110@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm Jewish, and instead of putting flowers on graves we put rocks. I found a beautiful rock and wrote a message to my LO on it and put it out front in the entryway. I see it every time I enter or leave the house :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507982 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 13:48:22 +0000 banana 507982@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Going through the grieving process alone and then talking to my family and friends about it helped me get through it. It was really hard on the both of us (DH and I) but having each other to talk to really helped. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507953 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 13:38:08 +0000 stargal 507953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: that's such an awesome selfless way to look at it. Love that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507947 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 13:36:13 +0000 Cherrybee 507947@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me, it was the moment I realised why it had happened to me, what the real meaning was and I could thank God instead of raging at Him. There was a thread on here about TTC woes and someone commented in a less than sensitive way. It occurred to me that, if my first-month-trying pregnancy had stuck, I might feel the same way.... But my MC helped me to understand what other women are facing and feeling. Subsequently, it has helped me to be sensitive to my SIL, who had a MC, when I announced this pregnancy and will help me to support many more friends who go through it. In short, my experience has made me a better, nicer person and I'm grateful for that. That's what helps me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507913 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 13:24:27 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 507913@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted to add that the HB community has help a lot too! I know I'm not alone but reading your stories has helped a lot! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507827 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:54:41 +0000 stargal 507827@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Grieving for our lost lo and naming him and making him a memorial really really helped. Crying a lot to my mom and hubby who let me talk about it all the time. Having their support and acknowledgement that it was. Indeed a baby and not just a missed miscarriage was essential and helped a lot. Also getting pregnant and having my lo has healed my heart a lot<br /> BC I wouldn t of had my pierson had I had my first baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507824 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:53:53 +0000 Mrs.Someone 507824@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was also comforted in that I was able to get pregnant. To be honest, thinking of it as a baby hurts more. I was told that genetically it wasn't compatible with life, so my body recognized that. Of course it still hurts, but I'm trying to just look at it from the positive angle of sperm being able to meet egg, step 1. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507808 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:44:49 +0000 Alivoo01 507808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: I had my HS best friend relay the same message when I told her about my loss. She said if it wasn't meant to be, there's a reason. And she listed a variety of reasons that was really comforting for me. She went through a similar loss and went on to have a healthy baby boy a few months later. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507805 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:44:23 +0000 MaisyMay 507805@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Having permission to hurt was probably the biggest thing. As I was going through my miscarriage, I ended up with a very bad ear infection that landed me in the hospital. Due to how focused I was on getting myself healed from that, I wasn't able to grieve the mc right away.<br /> When I was able to, I ended up very depressed. I saw a counselor at my hospital, and he told me that what I was dealing with was essentially post-partum depression and that I needed to let myself grieve before I could deal with everything and move on.<br /> Also, we had already told everybody that we were pregnant, so they were able to grieve with us. Having other people acknowledge that we had lost something significant helped us deal with our own feelings and emotions. They've rejoiced with us so much over this pregnancy and now our LO too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507800 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:43:16 +0000 Alivoo01 507800@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Lots and lots of crying and being "cradled" in my hubby's arms as he comforted me with his words and love. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507784 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:35:55 +0000 MrsTiz 507784@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow. Goosebumps! lol</p> <p>For me, it was simply the fact that I got pregnant in the first place. To me that meant the world. I can get pregnant, I did it once &amp; I WILL do it again. It also washed away any doubts I had about TTC, because having a baby for just a brief few weeks made both DH and I more excited/happy than we had been in a while. </p> <p>Another thing, which some people see as offensive...but a friend told me this and it really changed how I saw it. She said that maybe the baby I was growing wasn't meant for me. It's personality, gender, birthday, life plans, etc weren't the ones I dreamed of. It could be some thieving, lying mean little hoodlum.. not my sweet baby. If that makes any sense? I don't know how else to word it. But I know that my sticky baby is going to be my dream baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-brought-you-comfort#post-507765 Wed, 16 Jan 2013 12:26:29 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 507765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I went to therapy last night and talked about everything going on the last couple months. Grandpa dying, surgery trauma, &amp; our MC. He said I'm going to live &amp; that I don't need to come back. As weird as it sounds it was good to hear.</p> <p>The most important thing I came out of there with was comfort and understanding about my MC. First thing he said after I told him, what did you name it? I was taken back by that for a min and then felt a little guilty that we didn't name it. I guess because it was an early MC (5 weeks) I was viewing it through the eyes of a medical professional more so then the eyes of a mother. Protecting myself from anymore pain which caused more pain. He reiterated that life starts a conception, that we are now parents of an angle &amp; we can have peace in knowing our baby was given immediate entrance into heaven. This was exactly what I needed to hear.</p> <p>I went home nervous and excited to share this with DH. He hasn't talked about it much. I felt pretty alone in greeving over the MC. He would say stuff like, at least we know we can get pregnant now, and tried to be positive about it all. The reality of it didn't hit him till I told him what the therapist had said. </p> <p>This was huge step forward in our relationship. DH surprised me by wanting to name our baby. We names it Gabriel which is an archangel who typically serves as a messenger to humans from God. If it was a girl we would have called her Gabby, a boy Gabe.</p> <p>What brought you comfort &amp; helped you deal with your loss? </p>