https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 21:33:57 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2290022 Mon, 14 Sep 2015 06:03:39 +0000 Dandelion 2290022@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said 5+ cause my kids are 6 years apart and it worked out great for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2290020 Mon, 14 Sep 2015 06:02:37 +0000 GrapeCrush 2290020@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It really depends on the day when I answer this. Mine are 15 months apart, and a lot of the time I think it's a great age gap! The way they play and love each other and are BFFs is amazing to watch. Then there are other days when I can't handle two that are throwing tantrums like whoa, and wish there was 2-3 years between.<br /> If we have a 3rd(probably not happening :sad: ), there would be at least a 5 year age gap between #1 and #3. Which is ideal for our current situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2290006 Mon, 14 Sep 2015 04:04:27 +0000 Pumuckl 2290006@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have a 21 month spacing with LO1 and LO2 and I love it. That said we'll have a bigger gap between LO2 and still potential LO3 because I was put on modified bedrest with #2 and I attribute it to my body not being fully healed. Also I don't want an early fall baby since I don't do too well with pregnancy in the heat of summer. So the gap will probably be more like 2.25/2.5 years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2289995 Mon, 14 Sep 2015 00:01:40 +0000 daniellemybelle 2289995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it is different for everyone and there are pros and cons to any age difference.</p> <p>For me, anything less than 3 years would be too close for a lot of reasons. Mainly that we just weren't/aren't ready. Right now I am feeling like 3 years would be perfect - but we will probably wait a little longer so we are probably looking at more like 3.5 years. DH thinks as long as they are still 3 school years apart, the additional 0.5 of a year doesn't really matter when they are older which is a good point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2289991 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 23:22:58 +0000 birdofafeather 2289991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didnt vote because what's ideal for me right now is due to finances, work, my age, etc. what it will be for me next time we want to have a kid will be different. I'm stoked on having 1 and 2 (due in November) just under 3 years apart but we're planning on 2-2.5 years between 2 and 3. And ya know, sometimes it's just the cards you're dealt too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing/page/2#post-2289796 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 15:13:07 +0000 QBbride 2289796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are 26 months apart and honestly it's been great! DS sleeps well, so far there haven't been jealousy issues, he loves helping out etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289786 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:52:05 +0000 clover 2289786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Most people recommended 2.5-3 years to me. I had always thought 2-3 would be good (not sure what I was basing it on). DS will be 2.5 when DD arrives in November so I'm hoping for the best. What I can say is DS has become so much more independent and helpful in the past few months since turning 2, I can only imagine that helping once baby is here. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289785 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:50:14 +0000 MoonMoon 2289785@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree everyone's situation is different. I voted 3.5 years. My OB said it would take 1-2 years for my body to recover and replenish for a second pregnancy, especially with breastfeeding thrown into the mix. Plus I just couldn't deal with 2 with one a young toddler. I like the idea of spending lots of one on one time with each kid, giving undivided attention to a baby while the older kid is in preschool or pre-k or something. Sometimes I look at my 2 year old and the thought of dividing my time breaks my heart. So I guess I'm not mentally there yet, lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289775 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:35:33 +0000 Smurfette 2289775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think there is an optimal time. Everyone's situation is different. You have to choose what is best for your family. For DH and I, we need a bigger gap. We need more of a break from a baby. Our marriage is too important to have thrown another in the mix. I am ready now and DH wants another 9 months(to TTC). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289771 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:31:22 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 2289771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our kids will be 25 months apart, and I think it will be pretty ideal. I'd have liked them to be a bit further apart, so that K was potty trained- so maybe 2.5 years? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289762 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:17:07 +0000 BrandNewMom 2289762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: Yes! Literally word for word everything you said. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289754 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:10:38 +0000 coopsmama 2289754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There's no such thing as ideal spacing in my opinion. Mine are 13 months apart and frankly it's been AWESOME which I never thought would be ideal. I also know people who have had a three year (or more) gap and that has been great for them, too. And I also know people who have had all sorts of other gaps and it's been tough for various reasons. I think personalities and situations really play a part into whether something is ideal or not and when you being a new life into the world you're not really going to know how it's going to play out for a bit. :)</p> <p>We're going to TTC in November so if that were to work out my 2nd and 3rd would be 25 months apart -- I'm really interested to see what that gap would be like since the other gap is a full year sooner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289751 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 14:05:31 +0000 jetsa 2289751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: yes good point,I've got a double nap going on right now and I love just being able to stop for a bit.</p> <p>@mrsrain: ours are 20 months apart and I love it!</p> <p>@oliviaoblivia: there's a blog called double the fun and she hasn't blogged in a while but she has Irish twins and makes it look like so much fun. They actually have the same birthday, they're 3/4 now but she blogged a lot when they were younger </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289746 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:57:24 +0000 jetsa 2289746@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ours are 20 months apart and I love it. She's almost 4 months and he loves her so damn much, it just makes my heart happy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289742 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:45:19 +0000 Anagram 2289742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I dont really believe in ideal spacing, haha. But i like the 2 year spacing i have now because my 2 year old still naps 2 hours a day, giving me some time to chill w the baby. If she were older, i would never get the double nap. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289737 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:31:04 +0000 Mae 2289737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said 3.5 years because I'm undecided about 3-4 years. I don't thrive in chaos. At all. And I think a toddler + newborn sounds like chaos. I'm less concerned about "starting over" and more concerned about not hating life when/if we have #2. Not that people who have 2 under 2 hate life... but I think they are better/more patient people than I am lol. I want #1 to be old enough to pretty consistently tell me what she wants, understand quiet time, understand and be excited about a baby, and be beyond the "oh shit I can't not watch her for literally 30 seconds or she'll catapult herself over the back of the couch" phase. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289736 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:27:16 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2289736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think anywhere from 2-3 years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289732 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:17:33 +0000 shopaholic 2289732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have almost exactly 2.5 years apart right now, and it's so new still, but happy with how mature and able we are to communicate and reason with LO1 now. The past couple of months have shown a lot of growth with her, so I think that made a big difference! DH would have preferred 4 years apart for financial reasons for schooling. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289724 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 13:01:49 +0000 BandDmommy 2289724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS and DD- 2.5 years. This has been an awesome gap!<br /> DD and LO3- 17 months.. This is not ideal I would have preferred more time with DD as the baby.. Making the best of it though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289720 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:56:54 +0000 getjazzy 2289720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted 2.5 years. Ours are 2 years apart and that extra 6 months would have been handy to get LO1 potty trained first. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289712 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:41:05 +0000 mrsrain 2289712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ours will be 20 months apart. If I did t have to take certain things into consideration, though, I think 3 years would be perfect. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289710 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:39:13 +0000 NovBaby1112 2289710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't really vote yet bc my second isn't here yet, but I think anywhere from 2.5-3.5 is an ideal time. Mine will be 2 months shy of 3 years apart. My LO is independent, sleeping good, can communicate with me, and will be able to "help" out with the baby. Mentally and physically, I do not think I could have done anything under a 2 year gap. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289697 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:18:51 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2289697@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really liked 23 months and would have aimed for that again had nature not had another plan.</p> <p>Please vote for one year someone. Next year is going to be so hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289692 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:15:06 +0000 Greentea 2289692@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would never say 2 years, I think 3 would be ideal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289691 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:14:08 +0000 simplyfelicity 2289691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: I think I am leaning toward 3...my sister had two of her kids 15 months a part and she feels like she missed out on a lot. I can totally see that they.will be super close once they aren't so competitive with each other. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289688 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:10:18 +0000 Foodnerd81 2289688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@simplyfelicity: savoring the babyhood is a good point! I feel like I practically missed everything in the first trimester because I felt so crappy and I wasn't able to enjoy her. It happens with any spacing but I'm glad she wasn't tiny. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289682 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:07:04 +0000 sarac 2289682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted 2, but ended up with 4 due to infertility. I worry that they won't be as close as they might have been, but otherwise it is absolute heaven. My oldest is old enough to be helpful, old enough that I don't need to worry about her around the baby generally, and she absolutely loves her sister. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289675 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 12:00:47 +0000 simplyfelicity 2289675@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamasig: Congratulations!! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289672 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 11:53:52 +0000 Mamasig 2289672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@skipra: yes! Just found out - another May baby due about a week after DS2's birthday. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-do-you-think-is-the-optimal-birth-spacing#post-2289670 Sun, 13 Sep 2015 11:46:38 +0000 simplyfelicity 2289670@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2littlepumpkins: My thoughts too. Especially since we are probably only having 2, I don't want to rush it and really want to savor their babyhood. DH prefers 3 years and I prefer 2...I have a sibling 2 years and 3 years a part and we are equally close </p>